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No fans, no home arenas... the playoffs are going to be a street fight. So which STREET FIGHTER is your team?

For this, we're going to tap into the cast of Street Fighter II (not # 1). I may be old, but I'm not that old.
WESTERN CONFERENCE STREET FIGHTERS
(1) L.A. Lakers as.... RYU
It doesn't matter who's the betting favorite for the title or for MVP. The Los Angeles Lakers are the marquee team in the NBA, with the marquee player at center stage. If we were making a poster for the league, LeBron James would be front and center.
(2) L.A. Clippers as... KEN
As Pete Holmes asks on his ill-fated talk show, do we really need another Ryu? Do we really need another L.A. super-team? Does throwing on red jerseys/gis really distinguish one from the other?
But of course, the answer is, hell yes. The Lakers-Clippers has finally become a worthwhile rivalry, with both teams reaching title contender status at the same time. Like Ken and Ryu, these two have plenty of history together. And while the Clippers never proved a formidable rival to the big brother Lakers, their new star Kawhi Leonard certainly did his own damage. Leonard helped the Spurs beat LeBron's Miami team back in the day, and he's on the verge of his second straight championship now. If Leonard can pull that off, he should surpass "The King" and inherit the throne as the greatest player on the planet.
(3) Denver Nuggets as... E. HONDA
Comparing hefty sumo E. Honda to Nikola Jokic is too easy. Too cheap. Too lazy. So naturally, let's just do that and move on.
(4) Houston Rockets as... BLANKA
In Street Fighter, we have some classic fighter tropes. The sumo wrestler, the boxer, the ... green electric jungle monster?? WTF is that?? Similarly, Daryl Morey and the Houston Rockets have experimented and developed a monster unlike anything the NBA has seen before.
(5) Oklahoma City Thunder as... CHUN-LI
You may not expected a woman to come into a street fighting tournament and kick some ass, but that's exactly what Chun-Li intended to do. Similarly, the Oklahoma City Thunder were written off immediately this season (with an oveunder of 32.5 wins) only to defy expectations and hold their own. In fact, their winning percentage is even better than last season when they had Russell Westbrook and Paul George. Now facing a Westbrook-less(?) Houston team, they may not be such an underdog after all.
(6) Utah Jazz as... DHALSIM
Mystical yoga master Dhalism may not have the look of a vicious street fighter with his gangly physique, but when he extends his arms he becomes a difficult opponent to land punches on. Similarly, Utah's stringy center Rudy Gobert wins primarily with length (7'9" wingspan.) And while he may still be getting some bikram-level heat from the media and fans after the coronavirus episode, he'll have every chance to prove his worth in this first round matchup against Nikola Jokic and Denver.
(7) Dallas Mavericks as... VEGA
The masked man Vega is among the most dangerous fighters in the game, in no small part to the sharp claw that he's somehow allowed to yield into battle. Similarly, the Dallas Mavericks have their own unfair weapon in Luka Doncic, the 20-year-old who can slice and dice his way to 30-10-10 games. Doncic -- like Vega -- also cut his teeth (and claw) in Spain (playing for Real Madrid.)
(8) Portland Trail Blazers as... BALROG
In Street Fighter, boxer "Balrog" was a shameless ripoff of Mike Tyson to the point where they had to change the name (from "M. Bison") to avoid lawsuits.
Portland may need to hire good counsel as well. After getting whacked by rival Golden State last season, they're taking a page right from the Warriors playbook. Damian Lillard is doing his best Steph Curry impression, launching 10 threes a game this year (and hitting 40%). Without Curry and the Warriors around anymore, perhaps this version has a puncher's chance of pulling off some more upsets.
EASTERN CONFERENCE STREET FIGHTERS
(1) Milwaukee Bucks as... M. BISON
We've seen great players emerge from outside North America before, but none of them have ever been the consensus best in the world at a point in time. Dirk Nowitzki won MVP and a title, sure, but not in the same year. Giannis Antetokounmpo has the chance to do that this season if he can win MVP, DPOY, and a championship all in one fell swoop. If he does, he'll reign over them all.
Like M. Bison, the mystery man has emerged from the far corners of the world and threatened global domination. For you, the day the Greek Freak dropped 40-20 on your team was the most memorable game of your season. But for him? It was Tuesday.
(2) Toronto Raptors as... SAGAT
With all the talk about Eastern power M. Bison, people tend to overlook the destructive potential of Sagat. Remember, this is a competitor who held the belt last time around in Street Fighter I. The Toronto Raptors may still be lost in the shadows of their woodland rival, but they can more than hold their own thanks to their length and title experience.
(3) Boston Celtics as... GUILE
Air Force special operative Guile represents 'MURICA! right down to the flag tattoo on his bicep. Yet, strangely, the film portrayal of Guile had more than a hint of European in him thanks to the performance of Jean-Claude Van Damme.
Likewise, there's nothing more American than the "Boston Celtics," who sport at least 4 different stars born and raised in the good ol' U.S. of A in Jayson Tatum, Jaylen Brown, Gordon Hayward, and Kemba Walker as well as an aw' shucks apple pie coach from the heartland in Brad Stevens. Yet, strangely, there's more than a hint of a European style to their play thanks to their ball movement and socialist scoring (with all four stars between 17-23 PPG.)
(4) Indiana Pacers as... CAMMY
With Street Fighter II characters running out, we're going to have to extend into the Special Edition bonus characters like Cammy. Cammy was the second female character introduced. She was there, we swear. Similarly, the Indiana Pacers are in this playoffs, we swear.
(5) Miami Heat as... T. HAWK
Another add-in character, T. Hawk is described as an indigenous warrior from Mexico "whose ancestral homeland was taken over by Shadaloo, forcing him into exile." Sounds like the plight of sullen and wayward warrior Jimmy Butler to me. After being exiled from Chicago... and Minnesota... and Philly (kinda), Butler has found a new home with this rugged Miami Heat team. If his tribe members can supply enough shooting and arrows around him, they'll be a dangerous party to pass through.
(6) Philadelphia 76ers as... ZANGIEF
Russian mauler Zangief entered the tournament with an unusual approach: strength and size over speed. Similarly, big man Elton Brand prioritized size and strength this summer when he signed Al Horford to go along with Joel Embiid. The twin towers approach needs to work now, because the Sixers don't have another choice now that Ben Simmons will miss significant time.
(7) Brooklyn Nets as... DEE JAY
Another new character, video game makers must have figured Dee Jay would catch on with the young'ins. He's hip! He's cool! He's a recording artist! Heck, even his name is Dee Jay! He's the next big thing!
Similarly, the Brooklyn Nets are banking on being a big deal in the future. Sure, their current roster is a plucky group of overachievers, but by this time next year, Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving (if healthy) may have them among the title favorites.
(8) Orlando Magic as... SCOTT and MAX
Shit. We've officially run out of Street Fighter II characters.
Or have we? A google deep dive suggests that the two characters from the intro loading screen have names. "Scott and Max." Similarly, these Orlando Magic may only be here in the playoffs to serve as an introduction to the rest of the action. If Milwaukee is going to run the table, they need to beat somebody in round one. Orlando (minus Jon Isaac) will have to play that role of "somebody."
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Brazilian Big12 series, Episode 9/12: Santos

Previous episodes: Flamengo, Vasco, Fluminense, Grêmio, Botafogo, Atlético Mineiro, Internacional, Corinthians
In this series I will present each of the 12 Brazilian teams that together compose the "Big 12". My point is to make them more knowledgeable to you, since each one of these teams have their share of the Brazil national team success and of Brazilian club football accomplishments as a whole. I'll try to be as smooth, efficient and non-boring as I can. If the feedback is positive, I'll keep bringing more to this series. So ok, let's do this!
Method: I'll present the teams in a chronological order, from the oldest foundation (Flamengo-1895) to the latest one (São Paulo-1930). The order will be: Flamengo, Vasco, Fluminense, Grêmio, Botafogo, Atlético Mineiro, Internacional, Corinthians, Santos, Palmeiras, Cruzeiro, São Paulo. How many of these have you heard of?
Extra clubs: Due to a high number of requests, I'll also present 3 teams who don't belong to the Big12, but are also considered big clubs in Brazil: Bahia, Athletico Paranaense and Coritiba. Welcome to the club!
Geographical reference: Before we start, I'd like to ask something very simple from you. I want you to keep in mind that these 12 teams are spread in 4 different States in Brazil. The club's State name is written below, next to the club's name. It has a direct link to Google Maps, so that you can check it out to make this experience more accurate.

Episode 9/12: Santos (State: São Paulo), founded in 1912

State rivals: São Paulo, Palmeiras, Corinthians

Stadium: Vila Belmiro

Mascot: Whale

Major achievements: 2 Intercontinental Cup (1962, 1963), 3 Copa Libertadores (1962, 1963, 2011), 8 Brazilian Leagues (1961, 1962, 1963, 1964, 1965, 1968, 2002, 2004), 1 Copa do Brasil (2010)

State League titles: 22 (Against Corinthians' 30, Palmeiras' 23, São Paulo's 21)

PLAY AND LISTEN TO SANTOS ANTHEM WHILE READING - Click here
The Football Kingdom
There's an urban legend that says that a lightning never strikes the same place twice. But apparently this legend doesn't apply to the physics of Santos, a humble and small port city on the coast of São Paulo. There, a young kid named Pelé, would come up to become football's greatest legend, a man that could stop a war with his foot, a man that transcended all sports combined. In that same city of Santos - with a probable electromagnetic sequel caused by the lightning of Pelé - were raised the raw talents of the princes Robinho and Neymar. Curiously enough, Marta, the Queen of Football, and Falcão, the King of Futsal, also stepped foot and left a legacy at Santos, the football kingdom of the world. Let the story begin!
The early years and the 100-goal team at 1929 São Paulo State League
Santos was founded in 1912, but only on the late 1920s the team would become a threat to the State League teams from the state capital, São Paulo. Indeed, in 1927, the team led by Araken Patusca and Feitiço scored 100 goals in 16 matches, an average of 6,25 goals/match, a world record in official competitions until today. However, they lost the title in the last round to Palmeiras. These two players would make history in Santos: Feitiço scored 214 goals and is the Santos 5th top goalscorer of all time, while Araken Patusca scored 184, and is the 7th.
In 1935, Santos would win their first State League title, after beating Corinthians 2-0.
The Pelé Era: the greatest team in the world, the team that stopped a war in Africa, Os Santásticos
Before Pelé arrived, Santos had recently won the 1955 and 1956 State Leagues, with a great team led by Brazil NT forwards Del Vecchio, Pepe, Pagão, Jair, and the midfielder Zito.
After Pelé left, Santos had added 25 more trophies to their cabinet: 2 Intercontinental Cups, 2 Copa Libertadores, 6 Brazilian Leagues, 10 State Leagues, 3 Rio-São Paulo Tournament, 1 Supercopa Sudamericana and 1 Recopa Intercontinental.
During Pelé's time in the 1960s, Santos scored around 3000 goals, with more than 1000 scored by the king, in both official competitions (643 goals) and friendlies (448 goals) for Santos. Actually, counting only teams from Europe big6, Pelé scored 103 goals in those high-level friendlies, as you can see here. If we count all European clubs and National Teams, Pelé scored 163 goals. He also scored 87 goals against 1st division Brazilian teams, 116 goals against South American teams and National Teams, 44 goals against African/Asian/Central American National Teams, totalizing 410 goals in high-level friendlies - all data details here. At that time, friendlies were highly hyped, and there were more Europeans attending friendlies vs. Santos than attending their own national leagues matches - attendance data here.
League 1960s League att. average Friendlies vs Santos att. average
England 29.180 34.800 (10 matches)
Spain ??? 48.100 (9 matches)
Italy 21.056 39.620 (33 matches)
Germany 24.160 31.700 (15 matches)
Portugal ??? 34.000 (3 matches)
France 8.400 32.300 (8 matches)
Overall 20.700 36.750 (78 matches)
Pelé arrived at Santos in 1956, at the age of 15. In that same year arrived the right-wing Dorval, aged 21. In 1958 arrived the centre-forward Coutinho, aged 14, and in 1960 the attacking midfielder, Mengálvio, aged 20. They all joined the left-wing Pepe, at Santos since 1954, to form the famous quintet that dominated the world: Dorval, Mengálvio, Coutinho, Pelé and Pepe.
Player Apps Goals Brazil NT Caps Goals World Cup titles
Dorval (1956-67) 612 198 7 - -
Mengálvio (1960-68) 371 28 14 1 1 (1962)
Coutinho (1958-68) 457 368 15 6 1 (1962)
Pelé (1956-74) 1116 1091 92 77 3 (1958, 1962, 1970)
Pepe (1954-69) 750 405 40 22 2 (1958, 1962)
But everything started in the 1957 São Paulo State League, when Pelé was topscorer with 36 goals, at the age of 16. There wasn't a National League until 1959, due to Brazil's huge size and weak infrastructure, so the players would shine in the State Leagues, which lasted the entire year. Pelé, at 17, broke the São Paulo State League record (until today), scoring 58 goals in 38 matches, in 1958 - which brought him to the Brazil NT and to the 1958 World Cup. After winning it, him and Santos started travelling in exhibition tours to make cash and challenge the best teams around the world in "friendly" matches.
In 1959, Santos took part in the 1st Brazilian League edition, qualifying as São Paulo State League champions. However, they lost the final to Bahia (2-3, 2-0, 1-3).
As Santos lost the 1959 São Paulo State League finals to Palmeiras, they didn't qualify to the 1960 Brazilian League.
However, they won the 1960 São Paulo State League and qualified to the 1961 Brazilian League. From 1961 to 1965, Santos won 5 consecutive Brazilian Leagues, a record until today. However, Santos would always enter in the semi-finals and only play 4-5 matches to be crowned champions - this rule would only be modified from the 1967 Brazilian League.
Year Champion Runner-up Results
1961 Brazilian League Santos Bahia 1-1, 5-1
1962 Brazilian League Santos Botafogo 4-3, 1-3, 5-0
1963 Brazilian League Santos Bahia 6-0, 2-0
1964 Brazilian League Santos Flamengo 4-1, 0-0
1965 Brazilian League Santos Vasco 5-1, 1-0
Highlights to the 1962 final between Santos and Botafogo, which had 11 players from the 1962 World Cup won by Brazil: Gylmar, Mauro, Zito, Mengálvio, Coutinho, Pelé, Pepe (Santos), Nilton Santos, Garrincha, Amarildo, Zagallo (Botafogo). Santos won the decisive match 5-0 at the Maracanã, with this goal from Pelé.
In 1962, Santos also participated in their first Copa Libertadores, qualified as the 1961 Brazilian League champions. Santos topped their group stage against Cerro Porteño (Paraguay) (9-1, 1-1) and Municipal (Bolivia) (6-1, 4-3). In the semis against Universidad Católica (Chile), Santos tied 1-1 away, and won 1-0 at home. The final would be against Peñarol (Uruguay). Santos won the first leg 2-1 in Uruguay, with two goals from Coutinho, in a great comeback. In the 2nd leg in Brazil, a crazy story: after a big and violent confusion, the match was restarted and Peñarol scored the third goal at '51 (2-3). Santos only needed a tie and scored it at '67, the match ended 3-3 and Santos celebrated the title. However, the referee wrote down in the match report that the match was over at '51 - he was scared to really end it, so he kept the match going until the end, but it wasn't counting for him, so he (and CONMEBOL) declared Peñarol the winners. This forced a third match, in neutral Argentina, which Santos dominated and won 3-0, with two goals from Pelé and one own goal from Peñarol. Santos were for the first time, and the first Brazilian team, crowned South American champions.
This title qualified Santos to the 1962 Intercontinental Cup, against the European champions, Benfica. The 1st leg at the Maracanã ended 3-2 for Santos, with 2 goals from Pelé and one from Coutinho. Before the 2nd match in Lisbon, Benfica announced that they were selling tickets for the third match, certain that they would win at home. However, Pelé destroyed the match with a splendid hat-trick, an assist, nutmegs and dribbling past the entire Benfica defense to score one of his goals. The match ended 5-2 before a crowd of 73.000 portuguese fans, and Pelé proved once again he was still football's king, as he and Santos were crowned club world champions for the first time. Highlights of the match here (4mn56 video).
The next year, in 1963, Santos would once again win the Copa Libertadores. Being the current champions, they entered in the semi-final stage against the legendary Botafogo of Garrincha, Didi and Nilton Santos. The 1st leg ended 1-1, with Pelé scoring a tie at '90. The 2nd match at the Maracanã ended 4-0 to Santos, with Pelé scoring the first goal, also the second goal from a header, and the third from a penalty kick. Lima scored the fourth, with an assist from Pepe. Santos were once again qualified to the Copa Libertadores final.
They would meet Boca Juniors, from Argentina. In the 1st leg at the Maracanã, Santos opened 3-0 with two goals from Coutinho - notably this one - and one from Lima. Boca, however, scored twice with Sanfilippo and the match ended 3-2.
The atmosphere at La Bombonera for the 2nd leg was intense. 50.000 Argentine kept singing "Pelé hijo de puta, macaquitos del Brasil" (Pelé son of a b., little monkeys from Brazil). Then Boca opened the score at '46 with Sanfilippo. However, 4 minutes later, Pelé assisted Coutinho to score the tie. Later, Pelé mocked the Boca team by playing with the ball at Boca's GK hand. And at '82, Pelé scored the winning goal and celebrated with euphory and anger: Santos were back-to-back Copa Libertadores champions.
Santos were once again qualified to the Intercontinental Cup, and would face Milan. Santos lost the 1st leg 2-4, at San Siro, in Milan. In the 2nd leg at the Maracanã, Milan went to half-time winning 2-0. A heavy rain began and the pitch became a mud. Santos, without Pelé, counted on Pepe's free-kick to score their first goal. Almir and Lima scored Santos second and third goals, at '54 and '65. Pepe, again from a free-kick, scored the fourth at '68, forcing a third match.
In the third and final match, at the Maracanã again, Maldini committed a penalty and was sent off. Still without Pelé, Dalmo scored the 1-0 winning goal, crowning Santos once again club world champions.
Santos wouldn't win the Copa Libertadores again in the 1960s. They reached the semis in 1964 and 1965, and refused to play it in 1966, 1967 and 1969 - not only it was financially unattractive, but also too violent and with tendencious refereeing. So Santos prefered to travel around the globe and make cash to pay their expensive team.
The "Santos Globetrotters", would tour the world and smash whoever and wherever. 7-1 Internazionale, 5-0 Roma, 6-2 Napoli, 3-0 Lazio, 5-1 Lecce, 5-1 Barcelona, 6-0 Hamburg, 9-1 TSV München 1860, 6-3 Wolfsburg, 5-2 Eintracht Frankfurt, 4-2 Hertha Berlin, 6-4 Fortuna Düsseldorf, 5-0 Arminia Bielefield, 6-3 Benfica, 4-2 Sheffield Wednesday, 4-2 Newcastle, 5-3 Reims, 6-1 Racing, 6-2 Lyon, 3-0 Toulouse, 3-0 Feyenoord, 5-0 Enschede, 3-0 Peñarol, 8-3 Racing (Argentina), 4-0 Independiente, 4-1 Boca Juniors, 4-0 River Plate...
In official competitions, Pelé's Santos played 6 matches against Europeans, with 5W-1L:
Competition Result Goals
1962 Intercontinental Cup Santos 3-2 Benfica Pelé (2x), Santana (2x), Coutinho
1962 Intercontinental Cup Santos 5-2 Benfica Pelé (3x), Eusébio, Coutinho, Pepe, Santana
1963 Intercontinental Cup Santos 2-4 Milan Pelé (2x), Amarildo (2x), Trapattoni, Mora
1963 Intercontinental Cup Santos 4-2 Milan Pepe (2x), Mazzola, Almir, Lima, Mora
1963 Intercontinental Cup Santos 1-0 Milan Dalmo
1968 Recopa Intercontinental Santos 1-0 Internazionale Toninho Guerreiro
However, Santos wasn't invincible, and Palmeiras stopped them from winning 12 consecutive State Leagues (1958-69), by beating Santos in 1959, 1963 and 1966.
1969: the year that Santos stopped a war in Africa and that Pelé scored his 1000th goal
On the 4th February 1969, Pelé's Santos stopped an ongoing war in Nigeria. The civil war had been going on in the Biafra region since March 1967, and it lasted until January 1970, with the separatists' defeat. 2 million people died in the conflict.
There was a global effort trying to stop the violent repression of the Nigerian government against the Biafras. Artists like Joan Baez, Jimi Hendrix and John Lennon, authorities like the Pope Paul VI and the United Nations tried do contain the conflict, without success.
But Santos did. As the team was touring in Africa, they were invited by the Nigerian government to play in Benin. A first and only cease-fire was declared so Santos could move from the hotel to the stadium and then back to the hotel. Santos won the match 2-1, and left the country the next day, as the war restarted as soon as they were gone, lasting 11 more months.
On the 19th November 1969, Pelé scored his 1000th goal, against Vasco, the team he supported as a child, at the Maracanã. Journalists from all over the world had been following Santos matches, waiting for the 1000th goal to happen, which he did on his 912th career match.
By the end of the decade, Santos team had changed, but was still strong, notably counting with the right-back Carlos Alberto Torres, the midfielder Clodoaldo and the forwards Edu and Toninho Guerreiro, all of them champions in the 1970 World Cup, except for the latter. They notably won the 1968 Brazilian League, the 1968 Supercopa Sudamericana and the 1968 Recopa Intercontinental.
My personal favorite goal of this era is this one by Toninho Guerreiro, after a rainbow flick assist by Kaneko, in 1968.
The Pelé Era last title was the São Paulo State League title of 1973. Pelé left in October 1974, having scored 1091 goals in 1116 matches for Santos.
1978-1984: the Meninos da Vila (Vila Boys) and the last title before the drought
In 1978, a new term was coined to the players produced by Santos youth system, or just young players that were bought: the Meninos da Vila (Vila Boys), that won the 1978 State League. The 1st generation counted with Juary, João Paulo, Pita, Nilton Batata and Ailton Lira.
Meninos da Vila Apps Goals
Juary 229 101
João Paulo 412 103
Pita 408 55
Nilton Batata 249 36
Ailton Lira 182 37
In the 1980s, Santos built a good team that reached the final of the 1983 Brazilian League, and won the 1984 State League - Santos last title before the drought.
1984-2002: 18-year title drought
In this period, Santos reached the 1995 Brazilian League final - led by the idol Giovanni -, as well as the 2000 State League final. Santos won the 1997 Rio-São Paulo Tournament and the 1998 Copa Conmebol, but they were minor trophies and didn't count as the end of the drought, that would last until 2002.
Nevertheless, Santos became the first team in the world to score 10.000 goals - the record took place in January 1998, with a goal scored by Jorginho.
In December 2000, Santos was elected by FIFA the Club of the Century in South America, and placed 5th in the world, behind Real Madrid, Manchester United, Bayern and Barcelona.
2002: Diego & Robinho and the 2nd Meninos da Vila generation
In the last season of the Brazilian League with knock-out stages (round-robin were introduced in 2003), Santos were broken and bet once again on their own DNA: youth system and offensive football. Led by 17-year-old Diego and 18-year-old Robinho, and with great young players Maurinho (24), Alex (20), Renato (23) and Elano (21), as well as great experienced players like Fábio Costa (25), Léo (27) and Alberto (27), Santos qualified on the 8th and last spot to the quarter-finals - after an exciting 1st stage, even leading the league at some point, but dropping a lot in quality towards the end.
In the knock-out stage, Santos won 5 of the 6 matches before becoming champions. In the quarter-finals, against the scary São Paulo of Kaká and Luís Fabiano, Santos won both legs: 3-1 at home and then a 2-1 comeback away, with Diego scoring twice, one of them the winning goal on the 2nd leg.
In the semi-finals, Santos defeated Grêmio 3-0 at home, with a great show from Robinho, who got Grêmio's CB sent off and then scored this great goal. Alberto scored twice, notably this backheel one. In the 2nd leg, a 0-1 defeat was enough to put Santos in the league final.
The final would be against Parreira's Corinthians. In the first leg, Diego brilliantly assisted Alberto to open the score, and then Robinho at '88 also brilliantly assissted Renato to close the 2-0 score.
The final 2nd leg was monumental. Corinthians needed to win by a 2-goal difference to be the champions. It started badly for Santos, with Diego leaving injured with less than five minutes. But at '35, Robinho produced one of the most iconic moves of the football world in 2002, the 8 Pedaladas (8 Stepovers), after which he suffered a penalty, which he himself converted into a goal dedicated to Diego. Corinthians now needed 3 goals, and at '75 they scored the first, then at '84 they scored the second. Total fear in Santos supporters. But 4 minutes later at '88, the heir of the king, the prince Robinho carried the ball from the midfield until the right side of the box to assist Elano in Santos second goal. But it wasn't over yet, and at '92, him again, the prince Robinho left two Corinthians' CB completely lost in a quick body turnaround to assist Léo to score the 3rd and winning goal. The perfect match was over, Santos won 3-2, and were crowned Brazilian League champions. Highlights to Santos goalkeeper Fabio Costa who had this absurd performance (2mn33s video) and to Santos coach Emerson Leão, the man who chose to bet in these young players.
2003-2004: the show must go on
In 2003, Santos, Diego and Robinho were the Brazilian trend. They kept their high-level football with the addition of Ricardo Oliveira in the attack, and finished 2nd in the Copa Libertadores - losing to Boca Juniors - and 2nd in the Brazilian League - dominated by Cruzeiro.
In 2004, Santos won the Brazilian League again, their 8th and most recent Brazilian League title. With the departures of Renato, Diego and Ricardo Oliveira to Europe, Santos brought Ricardinho and Deivid from Middlesbrough and Bordeaux, and the international coach Luxemburgo from Cruzeiro.
It worked greatly, and led by Robinho and Elano, they won the league on the 46th and last round, after beating Vasco 2-1. It was a very dramatic league in all possible ways, and against everything and everyone, Santos were once again Brazilian Champions.
Meninos da Vila Apps (Santos) Goals (Santos) Clubs in Europe
Diego 133 38 Porto, Werder Bremen, Atlético Madrid
Robinho 253 111 Real Madrid, Milan, Man. City
Elano 322 68 Shakhtar, Man. City
Renato 424 33 Sevilla
Alex 103 20 Chelsea, Milan, PSG
2009-2013: Neymar & Ganso, the 3rd Meninos da Vila generation
After the 2004 team was dismantled, Santos won two State League titles in 2006 and 2007, besides finishing 2nd in the 2007 Brazilian League and reaching the semi-finals in the 2007 Copa Libertadores, led by international star Zé Roberto.
In March 2009, Neymar made his debut at the age of 17. With midfielder Ganso (aged 19), they finished 2nd in the State League, losing to Ronaldo Nazário's Corinthians.
In 2010, the Cirque du Soleil Santos show began. With the addition of Robinho (on a 6-month loan from Man. City) to the front line, the team reached a historical mark of 111 goals in 34 matches on the title campaigns of the 2010 State League and 2010 Copa do Brasil. Overall in the year, Santos scored 176 goals, and Neymar 42 goals. The team played for fun and brilliant goals were a constant, notably: Robinho's backheel goal against Rogério Ceni's São Paulo, Ganso finesse assist to Robinho against Grêmio, Neymar's little-stop penalty goal against Ceni's São Paulo, Ganso's lob against Monte Azul, Robinho's lob against Bragantino, Ganso's backheel assist to Neymar's goal against Santo André, Alex Sandro's goal against Cruzeiro, Wesley's goal against Grêmio, Ganso long distance goal against Grêmio, Neymar dribbling past the whole Santo André defense goal, Neymar's assist to André against São Paulo, and obviously, Robinho air backheel assist to Neymar against Santo André.
However, the epic 2010 team only lasted 6 months: Wesley, André and Robinho left to Europe, and Ganso got severely injured. With the team dismantled, they ended on the 8th position in the league.
2011 Copa Libertadores: the third continental dream title
Santos started the season with the 2011 State League title, beating Corinthians in the final (0-0, 2-1).
Santos also counted with the return of Elano for the 2011 Copa Libertadores, but the team started badly: 2 draws and 1 loss, so Santos needed to win all the next 3 matches to advance. And they did, without much problems: 3-2 Colo-Colo (Chile), 2-1 Cerro Porteño (Paraguay) and 3-1 Táchira (Venezuela). Highlights to Neymar's dribbling-goal against Colo-Colo and Danilo's long-distance goal against Cerro Porteño.
In the round of 16, Santos met América (Mexico) and beat them 1-0 at home in the 1st leg. The 2nd leg, in Mexico, was a 0-0 tie, with goalkeeper Rafael Cabral having an exceptional match.
In the quarter-finals, against Once Caldas (Colombia), Santos had no problem beating them 1-0 in Colombia, and then tying 1-1 at home, with this great goal from Neymar.
In the semi-finals, Santos beat Cerro Porteño 1-0 at home, with this great assist from Neymar to Edu Dracena, and had a restful 2nd leg after opening 2-0 and leaving Paraguay with a 3-3 tie and qualified to the finals.
In the big final against Peñarol, Santos left the 1st leg with a 0-0 tie in Uruguay, with Peñarol having this goal bravely disallowed at '85. In the final 2nd leg, Santos pressured Peñarol at home, until Neymar opened the score at '46 with a brilliant shot, after a fine backheel-play by Ganso and ball-conducting by Arouca. At '68, Danilo scored one more, but Santos centre-back Durval scored an own goal at '79. On the last minute, Neymar almost scored the third, but the ball hit the post. At '93, the match ended, and after 48 years, Santos were the Copa Libertadores Champions, for the third time in their history.
Neymar was the MVP and second topscorer with 6 goals, at the age of 19. He was also elected the 2011 Brazilian League MVP, but Santos finished on the 10th place.
With this title, Santos qualified to the 2011 Club World Cup in Japan. They beat Kashiwa Reysol 3-1 in the semi-final, with this splendid goal from Neymar. However, they were completely dominated by Messi's Barcelona in the final, losing it 0-4.
In 2012, Santos had another great year, led by Neymar, Ganso and Elano. They started the season with the 2012 State League title, beating Guarani in the final (3-0, 4-2). They also reached the 2012 Copa Libertadores semi-finals, but got eliminated by Corinthians.
They also won the 2012 Recopa Sudamericana and finished 8th on the league.
Meninos da Vila Apps (Santos) Goals (Santos) Clubs in Europe
Neymar 230 138 Barcelona, PSG
Ganso 162 36 Sevilla, Amiens
André 94 41 Sporting
Rafael Cabral 190 - Napoli, Reading
Danilo 80 10 Porto, Real Madrid, Man. City, Juventus
Wesley 63 10 Werder Bremen
2013-today
Since the Neymar & Ganso Era ended in 2013, Santos has won 2 State League titles (2015, 2016), finished 2nd in the Brazilian League twice (2016, 2019) and in the Copa do Brasil once (2015), as well as revealing Rodrygo in 2018.
Santos represents the essence of Brazilian football DNA, which is offensive and beautiful football, a philosophy which made their youth system one of the most respected in the world. You can watch here some rare Pelé highlights, here some 2002-2005 Robinho's and here some 2009-2013 Neymar's.
Santos is one of the 3 Brazilian teams that has never been relegated.
To this day, Santos has a fanbase of 6 million supporters, and a stadium attendance average of 10.300, as of 2019.
If you have any questions about Brazilian football, feel free to join us at futebol, where you'll be very welcomed!
submitted by majinmattossj2 to soccer [link] [comments]

I am a Sheriff's Deputy in Bull's Heart, Texas. Part 2.

Part one lives here. It'll make more sense if you it first. https://www.reddit.com/Revblackrage/comments/hxikru/bulls_heart_texas/
I was half way to my car before I knew it, fresh cup of coffee in my hand. Ellie wouldn't let me leave without one.
I set the cup of coffee down on the roof of the Dodge and started digging around in my pockets. Looking for my keys. A scream ripped out of the restaurant behind me. It was long and loud. Sounded like someone had just stuck their hand in a deep fat fryer. Or had it forced into one. It startled me and I jumped, So much so that I dropped my keys.
I heard a snort. Which sounded suspiciously like it was at my expense. I looked over my shoulder as I bent over to grab my keys.
Murray's horse, Pistola, was tied up in a parking spot, about three spaces down from me. It was technically against city ordinance to tie an animal up in a commercial parking lot. Outside of Rodeo season of course, And there was special emphasis on undead mammals.
But if you won't tell, I won't. The skeletal equine was staring at me over a feed bag strapped to his face. I pretended not to notice that the feed bag was stained brown, with a suspicious blackish liquid dripping from the stained burlap. Sometime's in Bull's Heart, the answers just aren't worth the questions.
"Cut me some slack, dude" I said. With a voice that may or may not have registered a bit of annoyance. "I'm not a three hundred year old dead horse. Shit creeps me out sometimes."
I could have sworn that old Pistola, rolled his eyes at that. But that may have been just me giving the horse too much credit.
Another shorter scream erupted from the diner. This one ending suddenly. The context clues I had at my disposal, told me it was Marcel who was doing the screaming in there. Now were I a normal Sheriff's Deputy it would be my job to run into that Diner, ready to get to the bottom of it. But. I already knew the score and felt no need to investigate further. Plus, fuck that guy. Stripers had no protections under the law and I was specifically instructed to ensure their safety at my discretion and i discresified that Marcel was a worthless piece of human wreckage, who should be fed to a wood chipper. His death would truely be a net benefit to humanity as a whole. And that was about as far as I was willing to take it.
Just as I scooped up my keys, I heard a low nervous sound from the undead horse. One of those 'Hey I'm not cool with this' sounds horses make. A rustle of feathers creeping out of the night sky, the horse's call of unease it's only accompaniment.
"Fuck" I swore outloud. A rustle of feathers on a night time breeze could mean only a few things in Bull's Heart and only one of them would creep out a horse. I stood up straight. Looking for it. Resting my paw on the handle of my Smoke Wagon. My fingers wrapping around the checkered grip of the ridiculously large revolver. They always come when the stink of blood is on the air. They bring the cold with them too. As was attested to by the shiver running down my spine and the light steam I was suddenly exhaling. The hairs on my bare arms stood up in response to the suddenly frigid air. On one level I knew that I was under no immediate threat.... But you tell that to two hundred thousand years of evolutional preservational instincts. Shit was there for a reason. Yes I suppose you could say the thing perched over the door of Earl's diner made me uncomfortable. Just a touch.
The neon lighting from the diner's sign cast an odd neon red hue across it. The light seemed to accentuate the shadows it lurked in. But I wouldn't even have to look at the damn thing to know it was watching me. The whole site of the thing was like watching a demon stalk you.
Nobody was really sure where they had came from. Nobody who'd been to the Great Beyond, or any other such ports of mystical or metaphysical call, could recall such a creature in any of their travels.
I would describe it as a humanoid, with big ragged vultures wings. Bipedal body. Bird's legs. A man's chest. I usually saw a big fuck off beak, that was attached to a face that looked similar to a plague doctor's mask.
But rarely did two people see the same thing when they looked at the creatures. Well for the most part. The going theory was that they were some matter of shape shifters. But that still left a lot to explain. Everyone described the same ragged wings and the same piercing eyes. Orbs of a pure white, that burned with a mix of corruption and malevolent anger. Like spotlights of hate on a greasy black night.
But nobody could agree on secondary characteristics. To me they all looked the same, but if I tried to describe what I saw, you wouldn't know what I was talking about, because you saw a horses head with a seagulls beak for a face, or some other such silliness.
This particular creature's wings were drooped over it like a cloak. I could see the eyes boring into me from the inky black recesses of it's wings. No notion of a head, or shoulders, or anything could be discerned from the shadows.
I glared back at it for a moment, before I took a good weaver style shooting position, drew my smoke wagon and planted it's front site post right smack dab between those dumbass eyes. It did nothing but glare back at me with those huge hate filled peepers. I couldn't even tell if it understood what was happening. But I could make out it's inky black talons flexing on it's perch, as if it was about to throw itself forward and rip my belly clean open in a fit of avian fury. Everything in me told me to pull the trigger on my Magnum Research BFR and send a .45-70 Government Consecrated Exploding Sabot round right into the thing's forehead. Everything in me wanted to send that unearthly thing back to whatever soulless void it spawned from. The things aren't right for this world and everything in me was telling me to send it back where it belonged. To the pit it crawled out of.
But technically........Under Texas department of Fish and Game code, They are classified as an endangered species.
So all I could do was whisper "Bang" like a petulant child and reluctantly holster my weapon. I am not horribly mature, I admit.
Yeah, sure they stole dead bodies. Sure they flew around from Dusk till Dawn creeping the living fuck out of people. Sure they had all the sentience of a learning disabled possum. But some genius decided to call them an endangered species and grant them protected habitats. Like the forests surrounding Bull's Heart. Because where the fuck else would they be able to go?
The thrice cursed things are Illegal to hunt for sport or harvest. And if you kill one by accident, you better have your ducks in a row. Because you are about to be investigated for Poaching. Which in Texas, means you are going to face a lot of Jail time.
Which is some Fucking liberal bullshit, if you ask me.
Our local game warden, a fella named Lingelsou, was very particular about the animals of what he calls 'His Forest.'
He also had zero problem running in Deputys for violations to the Texas Fish and Game code. He once arrested a Deputy named Landis for taking one down. Even though he had a good reason for it..... well maybe not a good reason exactly, but a pretty damn good excuse.
About once a month or so, Deputy Landis has a condition that.... Well it's just best that he gets away from people for a couple days or so. He goes a little wild in that time frame. So he goes out to a plot of land he owns out in the woods and just rides it out. Safer for everyone that way.
During one of these..... Fits I guess you could call it. He took down one of the creatures and ate half of it. Warden Lingelsou took him in for it. It didn't matter that Deputy Landis wasn't in his right frame of mind. He still didn't have a population control hunting license, which was the only way to legally hunt them.
Sheriff Onryu had gone to bat for the Deputy, going so far as to site the American's with disabilities act of 1990, trying to point out that Landis had a condition and certain accessions had to be made in order to provide a fair and equal environment for him. Including free reign hunting rights for the thing that lived inside of him. Lingelsou wasn't buying it though. "Laws be laws" The Game Warden had said. "In my forest and in my jurisdiction, the laws be respected"
Sanctimonious do-gooder Prick. But the creatures did a good job of keeping their number's low and they didn't really go out of their way to attack people. Unless cornered. Which is a good thing. Because when they are worked up into a good lather, they can take and dish out a lot of punishment before they finally go down. Kind of like a skybourne Armadillo. Only less cute.
This specimen, as if sensing my unease, leaned forward and screeched at me. I got the impression of a beak sticking out from between it's wings. The screech was loud in the frigid silence. It gave off the audio sensation of nails on a chalkboard mixed with a crying newborn. A pretty unpleasant mixing of audible input.
Than the burning eyes turned back to Pistola, and I briefly wondered if the Creature was going to go after the undead horse. I mean they were death eaters and technically the horse was dead after a fashion.
I would legally be allowed to shoot it at the point, as Pistola was technically livestock....Deadstock?..... Anyway, in Bull's Heart, you could defend tame animals from wild Animals. Especially with all of the weird crap that lives in our woods.
But before I could sink much thought into it, the creature reared on it's haunches, gave one last terrifying screech and took wing, quickly disappearing into the night sky. My caveman ego wanted to believe that it was because the Creature was made uncomfortable by my presence.
But more than likely it figured that the staff of Toothy Earl's weren't going to toss Marcel's corpse out the front door, so there was no point in hanging around. Either way Pistola seemed to be okay with the end result, as he let out a sigh of equine relief as the potential predator made it's exit.
I watched the night sky in the direction it flew off for a moment, wondering if it was going to change it's mind and come back.
They have a name.
Like we don't just call them 'Creatures.' I just happen to think the name is stupid. Real fucking stupid. Because it's not a hot chick on a winged horse swinging a sword.
It is in no way shape or form a Valkerye. And yes that is a hill that I am willing to die on.
It's a fucking bird monster, not a chick who escorts dead warriors to the All Father's table. Can't put that shit on the side of a panel van from the seventies. End of discussion.
I just call them 'Shitbirds.'
When I was certain that the Shitbird was gone for good, I turned and gave Pistola a nod.
"You're safe now, Sir." I said with a professional smile. "You're welcome."
The Horse just stared back at me with Milky dead eyes. He seemed super unimpressed.
"Fine" I said with a bit of feigned exasperation "act like that thing didn't have you scared out of your peanut sized mind"
The Horse snorted at me again and again I swear he managed to roll his pupiless white eyes at me. That damn horse was smarter than he was letting on. I shook my head and turned back to the Charger. But as I got into the Dodge, I thought I heard something. Like words floating out of the dark. Scratchy. Raspy. Just at the point of hearing. The point were you aren't sure if it's your inner monolog or your ears, and i definitely wasn't quite sure which one it was.
"The.... Master.... Comes...."
I stared off in the direction the creature had flown. Well that was odd. I couldn't be sure that I had heard it.... But I couldn't completely write it off either.
*
I knew the way to the Miller's house like the back of my hand. We were out there enough after all. The Miller's were two people that shouldn't have been together. But they were also both extremely stubborn. Neither was going to be the one who broke first and left. They also refused to admit they had problems. Even when they were doing their best to rip each other apart. Made conflict mediation between the two parties a royal bitch.
They were one of the reasons I hated this God forsaken town.
I was going to meet up with Gruk and Daliwal at the foot of the Miller's drive and we would go up their property as a group.
It's usually best to go out on calls with as much back up as possible. Especially in this town.
I briefly thought about Gruk's condition. I glanced down towards the Digital Defensive Control Suite sitting in the middle of my Patrol car's center console. The screen showed that the U.V. Defensive lighting rig that sat on the roof of the Uparmored Charger Hell Cat cruiser was off. I reached down and tapped the off button just to be sure. I than reached over and hit the manual safety, locking it out of action.
A lot of citizen's of Bull's Heart had one condition or another that made U.V. light anything from annoying to downright lethal, so much so that the local Government classified U.V. lights as destructive devices. If you had some? You had better have a very damn good reason for having them or you were going to jail. Occasionally certain people would kick up a stink about it, make some noise about it being a violation of the 2nd Amendment, but they usually didn't get much support because.... well it's hard to get people real worked up about lightbulbs.
It would have been a damn shame to take Gruk and possibly Daliwal out of action, due to some avoidable asshatted dipshittery. I actually wasn't sure if U.V. would take Daliwal down or out, but I did know his kind were nocturnal, so better safe than sorry.
I turned down the dirt road that would take me to the Miller's front gate. Something about the way the lights of my cruiser played down the narrow tree lined dirt road gave it an ominous feeling. I was hoping it wasn't a sign of things to come.
"Here the fuck we go" I grumbled outloud.
I saw Gruk's S.U.V. and Daliwal's cruiser parked next to the Miller's cattle gate. Gruk had to drive one of the bigger S.U.V.s due to her massive size.
"More like her massive ass" I said to myself, giving myself a slight chuckle in response, finding myself hilarious. And before you ask, yes I am aware that I am an idiot.
I parked behind the big SUV and got out, but not before I let dispatch know where I was. "Jen, Whiskey Hotel, 10-23 at the Miller's" I told dispatch over the radio.
"Roger that, Whiskey Hotel, good luck!"
"Roger. Thanks. Out."
Daliwal and Gruk were standing in front of the latter's cruiser, looking up the property. Gruk turned her massive head my way. The black pupils of her eyes seemed to dig right through me as she stared. Her lips parted slightly and she gave me a disdainful sneer.
"Oh look..." She said said sounding gruff and vaguely British, like a bad guy from a Lord of The Rings Movie "'Ey sent a pathetic little 'Oomie to back us up..."
The look on her face could have frozen fire. She looked like she wanted to rip open my belly and play with what she found there. She squared up her shoulders like she was ready to throw down and raised her hands up to shoulder height. Flexing every muscle she had in her upper body. Her jaw fell open revealing some seriously nasty gleaming white canines. A Threat display if there ever was one. Her Body Armor and her duty belt did nothing except add to idea that she was preped and ready for a real slobberknocker.
She took a step forward, looking every bit of the bruiser she really was. From the top of her pony tail to the soles of her size twenty black Bates combat boots, she was built for war. Literally. Thats what her race had been bred for.
"Only thing 'Oomies is good for is filling bellys...."
Daliwal looked over at her with a 'what the fuck?' Look on his face. He seemed genuinely suprised by her words and aggressive actions. He looked over at me, his big yellow-green eyes going wide. He raised a hand to his beard and stroked it a few times. Looking back and forth between us. I got the feeling that was how his nerves liked to showed themselves.
The palm of his hand faced outwards and his fingers seemed to go backwards like their joints were reversed. He was a transfer from another town like Bull's Heart, somewhere in Florida. Thunder? Or maybe it was Cougar Teeth? Not that it mattered I guess. He had only been with the Sheriff's department a few weeks now, and most of that had been training time. He may have been a veteran. But here in Texas, he was 'The new guy' and he was still trying to figure out what was what.
The look on his face said that he wasn't quite sure what he had found himself in the middle of here, but he wasn't a fan of it.
I wasn't used to the backwards hands thing yet and it was still a little weird for me. Tiger head was off putting too, but that was easier to get used to. Seemed like a hell of a nice guy so far though. Like he was really working hard to dispell the negative views most people had towards free form shape shifters. He didn't need to though. He wouldn't have earned his Star if he were an asshole.
I tried to come up with a witty zinger to shoot back at Gruk, but I was drawing a blank. I almost went with 'ol reliable,' a Shrek reference. But I wasn't feeling it. So I just raised my hands to the waist, making sure not to spill my coffee, and mugged a sarcastically terrified expression at her.
"Ohhhh scary" I said in the most mockingly insincere voice I could muster, rolling my eyes as hard as I could. "Cut the fuckin' shit, Gruk, you're scaring the new guy" "Watch your language!" Gruk said suddenly, dropping the bad movie Orc accent like a bad habit. Her real voice sounded more like a housewife from somewhere in the mid west. Like Nebraska or some shit. Flat but somehow bubbly. You always had a suspicion that the next word out of her mouth was going to be 'Ope.'
"And besides, He isn't scared he already knows I'm a total sweetie" She said fixing him with a wide smile. Which despite the fact that it showed off her massive fanged canines, still managed to come across as incredibly warm and inviting. Like someone's mom. "I gave him some of my famous oatmeal cookies, would a big nasty evil orc make cookies for the new guy?"
She directed the last question at Daliwal. He looked like he was still in shock at the rapid shift in tones. His eyes were wide and his jaw was still slightly hanging open. I could tell that he wasn't exactly sure if we weren't playing a game of 'fuck with the new guy' His shifted his gaze between our faces. He swallowed, a bit nervously.
"Well...." His voice had that crisp English accent that alot of educated Indian Immigrants had, when they learned their English at a British founded University. You could tell from his tone that he wasn't super comfortable in the situation.
".....The .....'Cookies'--" I got the feeling that he had to mentally restrain himself from saying 'biscuits' "--did have Raisins in them, so the question of your being a 'Sweetie' or something of a malicious sort hasn't really been settled just yet."
It took me a second, but I got the humor. Fucker was just so goddamn dry in his delivery, that it almost didn't land. I gave him a chuckle. I got the notion that he was gonna be an okay guy to work with. Once He got settled that is.
Gruk however stared at him for a moment. She didn't quite give a laugh, but she did give him another award winning smile. She placed her left fist on her waist and pointed at him with her other hand.
"I'm gonna have to keep my eye on you, Mister!" She said with a bit of humor in her voice. "And don't you worry about the Raisins, just my way of messing with the new guy, I guess. But don't worry. They help a body increase blood production. Thats good for you..... and Me."
Daliwal waited a beat before giving Gruk a wide-eyed nervous chuckle, before breaking eye-contact and looking down to make sure his boots were still on his feet.
His timid response set me off. I let lose with a stifled laugh. I squeezed my eyes shut and laughed into the back of my hand. My sides shaking. Now Daliwal wasn't a small guy, he was broad across the shoulders. Had Fangs and Claws of his own. A Gun too. I didn't know him too well, but I would bet that He could take care of himself in a fight. His kind were usually pretty good with their mitts. Or at least thats what I had heard about them. (That might just be a stereotype though. If it is, and anyone of you out there reading this are of the Raksasha people and have a problem with it, please know that I meant nothing by it.)
But when a Person of Gruk's size and ability, friendly disposition or not, makes a mention of your platelet count it could be a little disconcerting.
Especially since Gruk, in addition to being one of the largest specimens of Orc you would ever meet was also afflicted with Vampirism.
She was hell on wheels without the condition. Half the department had called her 'Mama Bear' because if you were down and bleeding and you needed someone to drag your ass out of the fire, she was the one you would want arriving on scene.
Believe me. I know what it's like to be laying on your back, getting the shit kicked out of you, looking up and seeing Gruk come charging onto the scene like a cross between The Incredible Hulk and Jesus Christ. But as to how she came across the Vampirism, It's actually kind of a sweet story.
A few years back she fell for a local gal named Maddie and they got married. Maddie was a vampire. In good standing of course. But than again she had to be, because rogue Vampires get run out of town pretty quick, if not staked down for the morning sun.
A man by the name of Kincade ran the local Vampire Coven and he was a stickler for 'The Rules of Fair Conduct' which 'The United Night Walker Covens and Clans of The United States, Mexico, and Canada' had applied to towns like Bull's Heart.
Kincade ran a tight ship and The Sheriff's Department had rarely if ever had reason to pick a fight with the Blood Suckers. Well.... Except that one time..... But thats neither here nor there. Plus we don't like to talk about it around here. It would be especially impolite to discuss it with outsiders.
Anyway the point is, that with the Vampirism accentuating her already considerable strength and hardiness.... she had gone from Hell On Wheels to a One Woman SEAL Company.
Part of the lovely couple's wedding vows had been Maddie converting Gruk into a Vampire. Maddie had taken Gruk's name and Gruk had taken on Maddie's condition. I had to admit. It twanged on the dusty strings of my heart. For some reason, it struck me as beautiful. To not only tell someone you want to be with them forever, but to take steps to actually do so? Well, I'm not gonna lie. I shed a few happy tears at the wedding.
I guess I'm a bit of a softy.
"Senior Deputy Gruk" I said, doing my best to come to Daliwal's rescue "if you could quit subtley terrifying the New Guy for a moment? I think we got us a wellness visit to make, if you would like to take charge and lead your valiant warriors on a crusade in the name of public safety? Now would be a good time for that."
"Oh, party pooper" Gruk said. But she drew up to her full height and turned to look up at the Miller's House. It was a white ranch style sitting on top of a slight hill. The lights were off and nobody appeared to be home.
"Okay" She said looking down at me "First things first, Cowboy."
She pointed down at the Magnum Research BFR in my Holster.
"Go to the trunk of your car and get a gun that isn't stupid"
"Goddamnit" I grumbled.
*
Five minutes later we were walking up the Miller's Driveway. A fifth Generation Glock 40 sitting in my Holster. We had to hoof it up the property. Because the cattle gate across the driveway was locked. Which wouldn't have mattered.
Because once a car crossed the Miller's gate, it tends to experience engine trouble. Never getting more than twenty feet before shutting down completely. Radios had issues too. Hell the 3D RMR Night Site on my pistol was probably dead. Like it's 10 year battery was burnt out. It was something to do with the Nature of the Millers..... and the Magic they threw around. Electronics hated the stuff for some reason. So normally we just left anything that had a battery in the car.
I was staring up at the House as I walked. It was odd. Usually at this point we could hear them screaming at each other, the pop and fizzle of Magic spells going off. Inhuman roaring as demons were summoned. Not to attack, but to help bolster arguments. Dishes breaking.
Tonight though? It was different. Dead silence. Like the house was a tomb. My eyes were going from window to window. Looking for any sign of life and finding none. No fluttering curtains. Lights popping on and off. No nothing.
Just the crunch of our boots on old asphalt. I almost didn't notice the temperature drop, until I was exhaling steam. I shivered inside my uniform. I was just about to ask 'Where the fuck did that come from'
When Daliwal spoke up.
"We are being watched" He said quietly.
"I see them too" Gruk said. All merriment lost from her voice. She was switched on now and jokes would be unprofessional. She eased the AR Pistol she carried off of her belt. It was chambered in .458 Socom, and of course the entire lower was custom made to fit her gigantic hand. Including a massive grip that resembled the handle of a 1911 Pistol rather than the traditional AR group. Making it the next best thing to a Bolter.
"I count twelve in the trees on the West side of the clearing"
"I count eight on my side" Daliwal replied, his voice dropping to a whisper.
"I can't see shit" I said, wishing I had some form of natural night vision, like my creature of the night comrades.
"Valkerye" was all Gruk said.
"Shit" I muttered.
"Language" Gruk gently admonished, without taking her eyes off of the Trees on the edges of the clearing.
I followed her gaze out to the trees. I could just barely make out the little pinpoints of white light, that would have been the eyes of the Shitbirds.
I whistled lowly. There were a bunch of them out there. I had never seen so many in one place. Usually when there is more than two or three in one spot, they would fight each other. It looked like these assholes were just coping a squat and having a watch. Very odd behavior for Shit Birds.
"I've never seen so many..." Daliwal said, a tremor of discomfort in his voice. I noticed that his tail was held down, close to his leg. That might have been a good tactical decision to keep the appendage out of the way....... or it might have been an involuntary fear based response.
"Don't let them get to you" Gruk said, her voice soaked in matronly concern. "They never come for us..... just for the dead."
"Yeah" I said, turning my attention to the house. "Boss Lady is right. Pay them no mind."
I took a sip from the Coffee cup I was still holding. I was intentionally trying to look as nonchalant as possible. Partially for the new guy, partially for the fact that I wasn't going to give the Shit Birds the satisfaction of spooking me twice in one night. I did my best to walk like I didn't have a care in the world. Daliwal looked over his shoulder at me. His eyes widened slightly when he recognized the stylized Alligator on the cup. Toothy Earl's logo.
"You were at Toothy Earl's earlier?" He asked me, his ears perking straight up "Was.... Um.... Was Miss Ellie working?"
"Yup" I Responded "She was breaking in a New Striper. Didn't go so hot for him"
"Ah" The new guy said "Do you happen to know if.... If.... She is...uh... talking to anyone?"
"She talks to a lot of people" I said playing dumb "it's part of her job, silly boots"
"Oh... Uh... No..." He said, turning back to watch his side of the clearing, and the Valkerye in the Trees beyond. "I meant is she.... In a relationship with anyone?"
"Well" I said continuing on in the playing dumb vein "I'm sure she has a lot of relationships, with a lot of people--"
"Oh be nice" Gruk grunted at me "You know what he meant." She said to me. To Daliwal she said "Yes there's a fella she talks too, but I don't know if it's serious. Tall, blonde, human, a lot of people think he might really be that one lightning guy, the one with the hammer.... oh what is his name.... oh it doesn't matter." Her voice picked up a little more Growl as she went on. Apparently remembering that we were supposed to be focusing on the task at hand "Both of you need to pay attention to your sectors. Or I'll treat you both like a couple of juice boxs and call out another couple of Dumb Dumbs to back me up, when I've sucked you both dry."
"Yes ma'am!" Daliwal said, responding to the matronly authority in her voice.
"Yeah" I said, properly scolded, not even attempting to go for the obvious joke there. "Sorry, Boss."
She was right. Now wasn't the time for jaw jacking. She had left it unsaid, but there were more Shit Birds out here than anyone had ever seen in one spot. They were acting strangely. This was the quietest 'Millers Call' I had ever been out on. I would wager that it was Gruk's quietest one too. It was too weird of a night to be acting like a dumbass rookie. There was a time to fuck with the new guy and this wasn't it clearly.
I followed Gruk's lead and drew my Glock. I checked the RMR site and noticed that my Dot was in fact no longer illuminated on the glass. Like the battery was dead.
Fucking Miller's and their spooky ass hoodoo. The rest of the short walk was quiet. I watched the front, where the house was. Gruk and Daliwal watched the sides. They stayed quiet.
I would occasionally peek off to the side, at the trees in the distance. White Eyes Beamed back at me, making them look like under dressed sparsely decorated Christmas Trees.
I kind of wished we were talking more. As the feeling of all those eyes on me was driving me crazy. Felt like ants skittering up and down my spine. Some light conversation would be great to take the mind off of current events.
When we reached the house, Gruk mounted the steps to the porch and paused. She looked around. She tilted her head up to the side and sniffed the air around her. She suddenly tensed up
"What?" I asked her.
"Blood" She responded "Lots of it. Human."
Now were this the movies. The Vampire would look at me like I was a pot roast and get a strange look in her eye. But this isn't the movies and Senior Deputy LaVonda Gruk is a goddamn professional and I'll not have you imply otherwise. She treated it like a call for help and instantly got ready to run into an unknown situation to potentially save a life.
She raised her massive pistol and trained it on the door. She motioned to me with her head, telling me to kick the door for her. She looked at Daliwal and patted herself on the backside, wordlessly telling him to stack on her. He nodded and did as he was instructed.
I leaned against the opposite side of the door, back against the wall. I raised my leg and swung it back, giving the door a solid donkey kick. The door flew open in an explosion of cheap trim and paint flakes. Gruk and Daliwal flowed into the house. Gruk having to duck down in the doorway, so she wouldn't bang her head on the door jamb.
"Sheriff's Department!" She yelled.
The living room was empty of life. There was a stone table set up where a coffee table would be in a normal house, with stone bowls and unidentifiable powders in them. Jars full of God knows what lined a massive book shelf that covered an entire wall. Candles lit the space, some burned all the way down. Looked like they had been going for a while. Strange symbols were painted everywhere. I recognized a couple of them, just from being on the job so long.This looked like a Wizard's lab or a Witch's brewery. It probably was too, knowing the Millers.
"Clear!" I heard Daliwal yell. His voice a bit more of a roar, with the adrenaline surging through his veins. Gruk looked over at me. She pointed to her nose and than pointed towards a door leading off the living room, she than patted her backside again. I got behind her, ready to go wherever she would take me.
Gruk always took point. She was the most likely to survive a Shotgun blast to the face and stay in the fight. So it made good tactical sense. But it was also just the way she led. From the front.
We left Daliwal in the living room. To hold our only known exit, in case someone squirted past us. Gruk and I cleared the rest of the house, finding nothing. We came to a stop at a closed door at the end of the main hall. She looked at me and tapped her nose again. I got her meaning. This was where the smell was strongest.
I nodded and reached down for the door knob, i jiggled the handle finding it unlocked. I shoved it open and in went Gruk, pistol at the ready. I flowed in behind her. The smell of tangy copper hit me in the snout like a bag of hammers. I involuntarily gagged. I couldn't see anything. It was pitch black. But I knew it was bad. Room smelled like a badly run slaughterhouse. I felt around for a light switch. Found a candlebra instead.
'Good enough' I thought to myself as i dug in my pocket for a lighter. I gave the bic a couple of test flicks.
"Wait" Gruk said from somewhere in the darkness. "It's bad. It's real bad."
"Yeah" I said. I had gathered that much from the smell. "But how bad can it be?"
I lit the candle. It must have been a candle with some magic to it. Because it lit that room like a surgery ward and Gruk was right. It was bad. It was real bad. It was a bedroom. You could tell because a massive California King-size bed occupied the center of the room.
The comforter was soaked in reddish brown blood. There was a lump of meat in the center of the bed, that I slowly realized was a woman's torso. On one night stand there were ten neatly severed fingers. In two columns of five each. On the other night stand was a head. Devoid of a face. Just ragged skull staring at the doorway. At the foot of the bed were two legs, crossed over each other like an X. I realized that various organs and bits of body were arranged around the torso in a circle.
I looked over at Gruk. She was staring wide eyed at the wall above the headboard. I followed her gaze. The face of Giselda Miller stared back at us from the wall, where it had been nailed up like a trophy on display. Eyeless of course, because the eyes were still in the skull. But I knew that face. It had screamed all matter of venom and curse at me before.
There was something weird about this. Well, yeah no shit it was weird. But there was a strange sort of order to where everything was placed in the room. I looked over at Gruk. She looked back at me. I saw her swallow a few times, like she wasn't sure what to make of this all. Her face looked almost helpless and I felt bad for the Giant Orc.
"We...." She started to speak. Her voice a little unsteady. She paused and closed her eyes. She swallowed a few more times.
"We need to get out of this room" she said, more in control of her voice.
"Yeah" I said moving towards the door. I had seen this level of carnage before. Part of the job. People say when you see shit like this enough, eventually you get used to it. Well I'm still waiting on that fucking day.
"Forensics will have our butts" Gruk said, command voice firmly back in place "if we mess something up"
"Yeah" I said. Not particularly giving a shit why we got out of the room, but just happy to do so. We pulled Daliwal out of the House with us. Gruk closing the door behind us, to preserve the crime scene. We spun him up on what we had seen. His eyes narrowed in thought.
"What?" Gruk asked.
"Back in Florida. We had a Necromancer in town....."
"Awww fuck" I interrupted with a sigh, knowing where this was going. Necromancers were bastards and I didn't want to deal with chasing one down. I had one throw a dead cat at me once. It bit me. Shit was weird.
Gruk did that hand-shake shushing thing that mom's do when you were interrupting their shows. She wanted me to stick a sock in it. Probably had a problem with the cursing too.
"What you describe...." Daliwal went on "sounds like a ritual she did. We never found out why she did it. We figured out who it was and showed up at her door step with a lot of firepower. She did not come peacefully." The look on his face, and the way he stroked his beard, said it was a bad memory. Gruk had an uncomfortable look on her face too. I couldn't say as I blamed Her.
This could be real bad. If somebody was going around killing people for some silly necromancer bullshit..... well my week was about to get a lot fucking busier.
It's always something with this fucking town.
"Okay" Gruk said "So let's get down past the Gate and see if we can get some back up out here."
"Gonna have to wake up the Sheriff" I sighed.
"She'll be pissed if we don't. But in the mean time, we need to get people out looking for Mark Miller. His whereabouts are unknown, so that makes him our only suspect at this point."
And since the power's that be have a sense of fucking humor......
I heard a rustle of wings above our heads. Right before about two hundred pounds of meat was dropped right in the middle of our little pow-wow. It was a body. The legs caught me square in the chest, knocking me on my ass.
The face attached to the body's head, sure looked a lot like Mark Miller's face. Albeit a little more battered and beaten than usual. Dead bodies have a certain look about them and Mark Miller was rocking the fuck out of that look, broken neck and all. All three of us looked up. A Valkerye hovered about twenty feet above us. It's wings wide open, like it was riding a thermal. It's eyes blazed as it glared at us from on high. I had never seen one not skulking in shadows. I had never seen one this brazen.
"THE MASTER COMES!" It screeched down at us.
Thats when all hell decided to break loose.
submitted by RevBlackRage to nosleep [link] [comments]

Sub Survey Results!!

Thanks to everyone who filled out the survey! I was hoping to get some insight into what's bringing people here and how we can improve, and I think we mostly met that goal! You can go on a deep dive into the results below.
In general, people come here because of the sense of community and how nice everyone is. Ways we can improve: more engagement with each other and with the band (I lost count of how many people asked for Rian's AMA lol). The mods will work on what we want to do with some of these ideas and go from there.
81 people filled out the survey. Last year, we had 65 responses. I linked the results to the last survey, but I have not yet gone through to see what's similar and what's different.
Disclaimer #1: Some comments were lightly edited for clarify or spelling.
Disclaimer #2: Next time I think I want to do a survey, someone please remind me how much freaking work it is to put all the data together.
Disclaimer #3: My comments are in bold, as are the top selections for each category. I was a little sassy.
Reminder: There are controversial opinions about the band and normal song opinions. You're welcome to respond to anything but remember to be nice and respectful. Everyone is entitled to their opinions and mostly everyone is here because of how welcoming the community is.

Demographics

Gender

Location
State (if in US)
Age

All-Time Stats

How Long Have You Been Listening to ATL?
First Album/EP You Listened To?
Where Does ATL Fit Into Your Favorite Bands?
How Many Times Have You Seen ATL Live?
Do you watch/listen to Crash Test Live/Full Frontal?

Opinions

Favorite Album/EP?
Least Favorite Album/EP
​
Favorite Song
Least Favorite Song
Favorite Opener - this band has some great openers. I went with Reckless but it was hard to choose!
Favorite Closer
Favorite Part of ATL
Least Favorite Part of ATL - this is why we're all reading this post, right?
Favorite B-Side
Favorite Song to Hear Live
Least Favorite Song to Hear Live
Dream song to hear live that they WILL NOT PLAY?
Do you have a favorite member?
Wow us with your controversial opinions/hot takes: or is it THIS section we're all here for?

Sub Feedback

How long have you been subscribed to alltimelow?

How often do you come here?
What other subs do you frequent? I took out all the because that seemed super spammy
What other fan spaces do you use? (To interact with other fans, not to follow the band/members)
If you use other spaces, how does the sub compare?
What do you like about the sub?
How could we improve?
What would you like to see on the sub for content/activity?
Anything You Want To Add?
submitted by jg429 to alltimelow [link] [comments]

Base Toyota Comparison 2019 Prius C vs 2020 Rav4

These are company work cars. Thought I'd give a little write up for people considering them as a work vehicle. My job takes me all around SoCal from the border with Mexico up to Ventura County. Roughly 300 miles per day average if it's a full day 8-13hr shifts depending on the schedule. This will be a brief write up mostly focusing on the characteristics that would apply to a purely economy vehicle since sportiness is clearly not what you're going for in either of these vehicles. The prius c has ~85k miles the rav4 had a little over 600 when I started and I have only 700 miles experience with it so far. Both largely driven in eco mode.
Driving characteristics:
Both cars suffer from a throttle that is more of an on/off switch. The eco modes exaggerate this and I understand that it is for economy but it is very annoying trying to a) pass someone on the freeway without the trans holding the gear way too long or b) making turn that you need to make somewhat quickly. Moderate throttle produces almost no power, heavy throttle produces excessive power.
This is where the vehicles show their difference. The prius feels underpowered at times but it has never really been an issue for commuting. The rav4 feels underpowered until you apply about 65% of the throttle then the engine grabs the gear and feels like the throttle is 100% open revving all the way to redline and provides a shocking amount of power causing torque steer and even tire slippage during a turn. I hate this as you are launched ~15mph ahead of where you were at before the throttle dumps which is always more than I need or want.
The Prius C feels like a gokart due to the small and thin wheels as well as short+narrow body. So great for freeways and roads alike as you have so much space. The ride quality is quite harsh and bumps/dips will make themselves apparent regardless of speed. Turning is good for an economy car and during turns down onramps you made too fast still feels very predictable - the wheels/tires talk to you well.
The rav4 has decent handling for a crossover but is much too big for my needs personally. Obviously worse handling due to the height/weight/size but still decent. Turning is good but this wont compare to a car. Ride quality is somewhat better but perpendicular dips present a challenge.
Both cars will understeer and both have heavy steering for their class - rav4 is much heavier in a good way feels very calm and secure.
Interior:
The prius C is plasticky and a little cramped. I'm skinny and 6' so it was alright for me but I can see bigger drivers being uncomfortable. The seats are alright but past 10hrs and my back will start hurting. An aftermarket seat rest helps a lot but still potholes are a little gnarly. Interior is sparse with basic cruise control and dash. No complaints as far as the touch screen goes it is functional. Speakers I consider amazing for a base. Jet engine style vents and curvy dash shape look great in my opinion. Cabin noise from airoad is present but not bothersome.
The rav4 has much more padding (padded dash, armrests, softer steering wheel, center console) and this I do appreciate. It is easy to do paperwork on the rav4 center console where the prius is impossible. Seats are much more comfortable but that could be because it is so new, the prius c already had 60k on it when it was given to me but if I had to straight guess I'd bet on the rav4 being more comfortable if it also had 85k. Interior is also sparse but less plastic makes it feel more premium. Cabin noise is much more than the prius very annoying at 80mph. Engine noise surprisingly loud for a 2.5L. Speakers decently worse than prius in all categories. You will probably find it lacking not in volume but in quality of the highs/lows.
Both vehicles have sun visors that are far too small in length and height. It is my biggest gripe that applies to both cars - you will frequently be blinded by sun coming from the sides and in front of you.
Electronic aids:
Cruise control: the prius normal cruise control vs the rav4 cruise is a huge difference. Personally I hated the radar in the rav4 (radar speeds and slows you with the car folliwing the car in front) as it kept me way too far back from the car in front of me. Anyone familiar with LA will know that in bumper to bumper this means cars will keep piling in front of you. Even at 80mph LA drivers drive close together and using radar just is not what you wanna be doing. On top of this radar would sense cars not in my lane during turns a couple times and rapidly decelerate AND sometimes momentarily thought bumps in the road were people/cars inducing a short period of rapid braking - both these situations induce a lot of anxiety.
Prius C is easy to use and will accelerate/decelerate perfectly imo application results in concise de/acceleration. The rav4 de/increase buttons are confusing as I have pressed the + button many times only to find that over the span of a minute it had increased the speed 15mph past where I wanted it and still going well into the 90s. I'm sure with more time I could figure this system out but for now all I can say is it is definitely confusing at first.
Auto braking is overall good. Brakes apply strongly but smoothly and I have not seen this feature activate unnecessarily to the point of concern in either car. Sometimes I feel like both cars auto brake when not necessary but no complaints because I probably should've been braking earlier tbh.
The rav4 has blind spot assist which I never needed as visibility was great for a vehicle that size, but it was cool and I have no complaints. The prius doesnt have them but I havent felt the need for them as visibility is great.
Rav4 has electronic parking brake which I dont like as I prefer the physical feeling of pulling one. No complaints though you can feel the brakes squeeze down if you pay attention so you know its good. Button has red light when activated - a good visual confirmation.
Prius has a digital speedometer which I find very responsive and quite enjoy. No RPM gauge which freaks me out a little but overall is fine. Speedo on rav4 is a little hard to tell speed with preciseness but is fine.
Rav4 has lane keep assist but unfortunately I didnt think to try it as I've never used it before and I was paranoid about wrecking a company car due to some computer I dont know much about.
Gas mileage
In eco mode the rav4 hangs out close to 30mpg in my daily mix of city/freeway 15/85 split for my work. The prius C averages ~44mpg for the day which is a huge improvement. Gas mileage struggles on long uphill freeways but balances out well over time. Both vehicles feel to me like they get roughly the same distance per tank.
Transmission:
I kind of already jumbled this into driving characteristics but I will add that the trans on the rav4 was a letdown for me as a person who drives manuals getting to try a 2020 8 speed. Good improvement over the automatics I have experienced (latest previously being 2013ish if you dont count this prius) but still indecisive and rough. Sport mode on the rav4 helped a lot but shifting thru 8 gears by pushing/pulling was boring and still felt laggy.
The prius is also a bit laggy but less jerky by far. Battery only mode is a cool feature - great peace of mind for not running out of gas. No way to shift gears but I doubt I would anyway on this economy car.
Exterior
This section is mostly focusing on how others precieve you as that's really all you care about for a work car.
Prius C is lowkey and smooth looking. You are invisible to cops and aggressive drivers alike.
Rav4 has rugged looks I actually really like it for a crossover. Aggressive people in crossovers actually tried to egg me into a race for some reason. People look at my car more. I feel like cops look at me more. But I blew past one sitting at a speed trap going nearly 30 over and he didnt blink... may have been luck.
Both cars look professional although the rav4 looks more regal to the people who see you exit it.
If you have questions or comments hmu. Overall I prefer the prius c for my needs (low amount of gear) and would choose it over the rav4 which I would only buy if I really needed the space.
Edit: after writing this I tried the steering assist and it was a hell of an experience. I've never driven a car that will even partially drive itself so this was crazy for me. It still struggled to stay in its lane in LA freeways where lines disappear, parts of the road dissolve into holes from semis, inconsistent paths etc and I had to jerk the wheel a few times. Combined with the radar it would still drive without hiccup for a few mins at a time. It still has a long way to go before it could drive itself completely but this definitely gave me hope for the future!
submitted by Trippy-Skippy to cars [link] [comments]

GMHI DD

Gores Metropoulos – GMHI
IPO Date: 2/6/2019 | Deadline: 2/5/2021
Target Industry: Food & Consumer
https://www.gores.com/portfolio/gores-metropoulos-inc/
SEC Link
The Breakdown:
Institutional Holdings
​
Gores Track Record
Leadership team
Dean Metropoulos has been our Chairman since August 2018. Mr. Metropoulos has served as Executive Chairman of the Board of Directors of Hostess since November 2016. Since 2013, Mr. Metropoulos has served as the Executive Chairman of certain subsidiaries of Hostess and a member of the Board of Directors of Hostess. Mr. Metropoulos also served on the Board of Directors of Pabst Brewing Company until 2014. Mr. Metropoulos has over 30 years of experience in acquiring and restructuring businesses in the U.S., Mexico and Europe, focusing on the food and consumer sectors. Mr. Metropoulos has been involved in approximately 80 transactions, including investments in Pabst Brewing Company, Utz Quality Foods LLC, Pinnacle Foods Group, Inc.(Swanson/Hungry-Man,Vlasic Pickles, Open Pit Barbeque Sauce, Duncan Hines, Log Cabin Syrup, Mrs. Butterworth’s Syrup, Aunt Jemima Frozen Breakfast, Mrs. Paul’s Seafood, Van De Kamp’s Seafood, Celeste Pizza and Lender’s Bagels), Aurora Foods, Stella Foods, The Morningstar Group, International Home Foods (Chef Boyardee, Pam Cooking Spray, Gulden’s Mustard and Bumble Bee Tuna), Ghirardelli Chocolate, Mumm and Perrier Jouet Champagnes and Hillsdown Holdings, PLC (Premier International Foods, Burtons Biscuits and Christie Tyler Furniture), among others. Mr. Metropoulos holds a B.S. and an M.B.A. from Babson College. Mr. Metropoulos’ business expertise, financial acumen and business industry contacts make him well qualified to serve as a member of our board of directors.
Alec Gores has been our Chief Executive Officer and a member of our Board of Directors since August 2018. Mr. Gores is the Founder, Chairman and Chief Executive Officer of The Gores Group, a global investment firm focused on acquiring businesses that can benefit from the firm’s operating expertise. Mr. Gores implemented an operational approach to private equity investing when he founded The Gores Group in 1987 by operating businesses alongside management, or in some cases in lieu of management, to build value in those entities. Since then, the firm has acquired more than 100 businesses including a current portfolio of more than 20 active companies worldwide. Mr. Gores began his career as a self-madeentrepreneur and operating executive. In 1978, he self-funded and founded Executive Business Systems (EBS), a developer and distributor of vertical business software systems. Within seven years, EBS had become a leading value-added reseller in Michigan and employed over 200 people. In 1986, CONTEL purchased EBS, and Mr. Gores subsequently began acquiring and operating non-core businesses from major corporations and building value in those entities, a decision that ultimately led to the founding of what has evolved into The Gores Group today. Under his leadership, The Gores Group has continued to acquire businesses in need of operational and financial resources, while creating value and working with management teams to establish an entrepreneurial environment as a foundation for sustainable growth. This philosophy has served the firm well. Mr. Gores served as the Chairman of the Board of Directors of Gores Holdings I from its inception in June 2015 until completion of the Hostess acquisition in November 2016. Additionally, Mr. Gores has served as the Chairman of the Board of Directors of Gores Holdings II (Nasdaq: GSHT) and Gores Holdings III (Nasdaq: GRSH) since their inception in August 2016 and October 2017, respectively. Mr. Gores holds a degree in Computer Science from Western Michigan University. Mr. Gores’ significant investment and financial expertise make him well qualified to serve as a member of our board of directors.
Andrew McBride has been our Chief Financial Officer and Secretary since August 2018. Mr. McBride has served as Director, Finance and Tax at The Gores Group since February 2010, where he is responsible for tax due diligence and structuring of acquisitions, compliance, planning, financial management and portfolio company reporting. Mr. McBride served as the Chief Financial Officer and Secretary of Gores Holdings I from January 2016 until completion of the Hostess acquisition in November 2016. Additionally, Mr. McBride served as the Chief Financial Officer and Secretary of Gores Holdings II (Nasdaq: GSHT) from its inception in August 2016 until October 2018 and he has served as the Chief Financial Officer and Secretary of Gores Holdings III (Nasdaq: GRSH ) since its inception in October 2017. Previously, from January 2008 to January 2010, Mr. McBride worked in the High Net Worth group at Ehrhardt, Keefe, Steiner, and Hottman, P.C.. From January 2004 to January 2008, Mr. McBride was with KPMG, LLP, assisting international corporations with tax planning, structuring and compliance issues. Mr. McBride holds a B.S. in Accounting and Finance from the University of Notre Dame and is licensed as a Certified Public Accountant in the State of Colorado.
Randall Bort will serve as a member of our board of directors upon completion of this offering. Mr. Bort is a Co-Founder of SandTree Holdings, LLC, a private commercial real estate investment firm since November 2012. Previously, Mr. Bort was an investment banker at Drexel Burnham Lambert, BT Securities, Donaldson, Lufkin & Jenrette, Credit Suisse First Boston, The Mercanti Group and Imperial Capital. Mr. Bort has significant financial, transactional and capital markets experience across multiple industries and has worked both domestically and in Asia. Mr. Bort earned a B.A. in Economics and Mathematics from Claremont McKenna College and an M.B.A. in Finance and Entrepreneurial Management from The Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania. Mr. Bort served as a member of the Board of Directors of Gores Holdings I from August 2015 until completion of the Hostess acquisition in November 2016. Additionally, Mr. Bort has served as a member of the Board of Directors of Verra Mobility Corp. (Nasdaq: VRRM) (formerly Gores Holdings II (Nasdaq: GSHT)) and Gores Holdings III (Nasdaq: GRSH ) since their inception in August 2016 and October 2017, respectively. Mr. Bort also is a member of the Board of Trustees of Children’s Bureau, a non-profit organization based in Los Angeles focused on foster care and the prevention of child abuse. Mr. Bort’s significant investment and financial expertise make him well qualified to serve as a member of our board of directors.
Michael Cramer will serve as a member of our board of directors upon completion of this offering. Mr. Cramer has been the Chief Administrative Officer & Executive VP at Hostess Brands, Inc. since 2013 and the Founding Director-Texas Program in Sports and Media at The University of Texas at Austin since 2010. Mr. Cramer was employed as a Director, SVP-Business Planning & Development by The Pabst Brewing Co. from 2010 to 2014, and was previously employed as an Associate Professor by New York University, a Chief Administrative Officer & Executive VP by Pinnacle Foods Corp., a President & Chief Operating Officer by Hicks Sports Group LLC and President of the Texas Rangers Baseball Club and Dallas Stars Hockey team, an Executive Vice President & General Counsel by Morningstar Group, Inc., an Executive VP-Administration & General Counsel by Stella Foods, Inc., a Vice President by CDM Hostess Class C LLC, a Vice President by Fairmont Aviation LLC, a Principal by Ghirardelli Chocolate Co., and a Director & Executive Vice President by International Home Foods, Inc. He also practiced law for approximately 10 years in Wisconsin. He received his undergraduate degree from State University of New York at Albany and a J.D. from Marquette University Law School.
Joseph Gatto will serve as a member of our board of directors upon the completion of this offering. Mr. Gatto has been a partner at Perella Weinberg Partners, L.P., a leading independent global financial services firm providing corporate advisory and asset management services (“PWP”) since 2012. Prior to his employment at PWP, Mr. Gatto was an investment banker holding senior roles in mergers and acquisitions and corporate finance at Goldman, Sachs & Co., Lehman Brothers Inc. and Barclays plc. Mr. Gatto has significant financial, transactional and capital markets experience, particularly in the consumer products and retail industries, and has worked with clients in the Americas, Europe and Asia. Mr. Gatto has also served as an Adjunct Professor of Law at the University of Pennsylvania Law School and a Fellow at Harvard University’s Advanced Leadership Initiative. Mr. Gatto holds an A.B. in economics and international affairs from the Woodrow Wilson School at Princeton University. He also holds an M.B.A. from the Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania and a J.D. from the University of Pennsylvania Law School. Mr. Gatto’s significant investment banking, financial and strategic expertise make him well qualified to serve as a member of our board of directors.
​
Positions: None right now, there's some time before we may see action. Currently commons are trading at $11 and warrants are at $2.2, the warrants are pricey right now. I'm in HCAC and SPAQ at the moment but this seems to be the next short term play after, long term for me would be IPOC or PSTH. I'm betting on the leadership.
The bad: no real forward purchase or PIPE investors or any external funding, which is okay. could indicate that the team is confident in their strategy without the need for additional funding ($400 mil in their own investment)
My thought process: if TWNK came out in this current SPAC market, would we see a hype? 1000% I think they can choose slightly above average known consumer targets and we'll see strong price action.
EDIT: added some inst holdings
submitted by genuisgeek to SPACs [link] [comments]

Wrestling Observer Rewind ★ Jun. 3, 2002

Going through old issues of the Wrestling Observer Newsletter and posting highlights in my own words. For anyone interested, I highly recommend signing up for the actual site at f4wonline and checking out the full archives.
PREVIOUSLY:
1-7-2002 1-14-2002 1-21-2002 1-28-2002
2-4-2002 2-11-2002 2-18-2002 2-25-2002
3-4-2002 3-11-2002 3-18-2002 3-25-2002
4-1-2002 4-8-2002 4-15-2002 4-22-2002
4-29-2002 5-6-2002 5-13-2002 5-20-2002
5-27-2002
  • We start with more on the death of Davey Boy Smith, including a full-length super long obituary, because apparently 2002 is nothing but people dying. I feel like I've done nothing but recap obituaries since starting back with 2002. Anyway. in the wake of Smith's death, the reaction has sadly not been one of surprise. Anyone who saw Smith in the last 4-5 years pretty much saw it coming. The cause of death, pending toxicology results, was ruled a heart attack caused from prolonged steroid use. But until the toxicology results are back, the belief among his friends and family is that there was probably more to it. Dave talks about the staggering number of wrestlers who have died under age 40 in recent years, with upwards of 20 of them being due to drug issues.
  • Smith died while on vacation with his girlfriend Andrea Hart, estranged wife of Bruce Hart. Despite that, Smith was actually on good terms with most of the Hart family, although Andrea is not. The Hart family believes Andrea knows more than she's letting on about the circumstances of his death, but she's not talking to anybody. Andrea's children (that she had with Bruce) were also there and they each apparently have different accounts of how he died (he was sleeping! he was in the pool! he was eating!) but they all pretty much agree he collapsed doing whatever he was doing. Andrea told the press that she believed Smith had overdosed, but Smith's dad did his own interviews and denied it, saying his son had stopped using drugs and was clean when he died. Needless to say, most people aren't buying that given his track record. Smith's father decided against having the body cremated and instead ordered it sent back to England for examination to make sure he wasn't murdered. "I cannot believe his death was natural," he said. "If they find drugs in his body, then he didn't put them there. Davey was clean." (Eeeeeeehhhhh....) Shit got even messier when Andrea and Smith's ex-wife Diana Hart each tried to claim the body. Despite her book (in which she accused Smith of drugging, abusing, and raping her), Diana played grieving widow in the media even though they're divorced. It may not have been an act though. Some in the family believe Smith and Diana were trying to reconcile, and they were on good terms at the time of his death. Andrea claimed to be his common-law wife, even though she's still legally married to Bruce. She later claimed Smith had proposed to her 2 weeks before his death and said they were engaged, which was the first anyone had heard about that. Smith's father claims in their last conversation, Davey Boy had told him he was planning to break up with Andrea after their vacation. So who knows. Anyway, both Diana and Andrea planned their own separate memorial services, while Smith's dad is planning his own 3rd service. Smith's body wasn't at either of the Hart family memorial services because, as mentioned, it was sent back to England where authorities are launching an investigation at the behest of Smith's father.
  • Andrea's service was said to be small and simple, just a few dozen people, and she seemed sincere in her sorrow. Diana's service was larger and more public, with hundreds of attendees and press, along with several WWE names. Vince McMahon, Hulk Hogan, Bret Hart (who attended both services), Chris Benoit, Chris Jericho, Jim Ross, and others all attended and several of them spoke. Diana's eulogy featured a professionally produced video featuring Davey Boy footage from WWE that had never aired on television before. She thanked Vince for trying to help Davey with his addiction issues. She never acknowledged everything she wrote about him in her book last year. Smith's children as well as Stampede wrestler TJ Wilson gave speeches as well. 16-year-old Harry Smith was composed and gave a great speech about teaming with his father in his last matches. And then Ellie Hart got up there and....it went about how you'd expect. She started ranting about Andrea and blaming her for not giving the family the answers they wanted and it started to turn into some drama, but the minister gently interrupted her and got things back on track. And finally, Bret Hart gave a speech, directly addressing Smith's children and saying that Davey Boy and Owen would want the children of all these Hart family members to get along with each other better than the adults have. From here, Dave gets into the actual meat of the obituary, recapping Smith's life and career. As always, an excellent read but very long to recap.
  • WWE Confidential, the new show the company is producing, aired its debut episode this week, focusing on the Montreal Screwjob. Dave once again talks about how Vince McMahon tried to downplay the incident recently, giving an interview just a couple of months ago calling the Screwjob a minor incident that almost no one cares about. Vince went so far as to say he could count on one hand the number of people who even still care about that old news. Turns out one of those must be Vince because this week, they dedicated the premiere of this new show to the story and highlighted it as the most controversial night in the history of wrestling. The hook of the show was Shawn Michaels revealing publicly, for the first time, that yes, he was in on the screwjob and knew about it in advance. Dave says this isn't really a secret. Shawn denied having any knowledge of it that night but as soon as the day after Survivor Series 97, he was bragging to friends about it. Vince McMahon also later confided in Undertaker that Shawn knew ahead of time. So it was kind of an open "secret" that Shawn knew but this is the first time he's admitted it publicly. Triple H still denies knowing about it ahead of time, but Dave is pretty skeptical there too (and indeed, it's later revealed that yes indeed, Triple H also knew). Dave thinks lots of people had to know. Even the guy who cued the music had to know, because Shawn's music was queued up and ready to play the second Vince ordered the bell to be rung. Pat Patterson always claimed not to know and Bret has said he wants to believe it, because he likes Pat, but the way Pat interrupted the match-planning conversation and specifically suggested the sharpshooter spot to them makes Bret question it (I think Patterson still denies it to this day, but I have my doubts there too). Anyway, the show recapped the history of the Screwjob and if you know Dave, you know he's about to poke a whole bunch of holes in WWE's revisionist bullshit. Here we go...
  • The story of the episode was WWF was close to going out of business due to the WCW war and couldn't afford Bret anymore, so Vince nobly allowed Hart out of his contract so he could negotiate a better deal with WCW. Actually, Dave says, Vince first talked to Bret about deferring some of his contract to later on but that was a couple months earlier. At the time, WWF really was having some financial struggles, but it's an exaggeration to say they were almost driven out of business. They were never even close. But regardless, that's irrelevant because in Sept. 97, they raised the price of PPVs by $10. That added revenue, which was nearly $1 million per month in pure profit, was easily enough to get them out of financial trouble. By the time Survivor Series 97 rolled around, WWF was doing just fine, money-wise, and were only a couple months away from catching fire and getting nuclear hot. So no, they did not need to get rid of Bret's contract. And in fact, in October, a couple weeks before Survivor Series, Vince changed his mind and asked Bret to stay, saying that the financial situation had turned around. But by this point, Hart's negotiations with WCW were full speed ahead and Vince allowed Hart to continue negotiating. But after talking to both sides, it was clear Vince had no real plan for Bret and he didn't really seem like he wanted to keep him, so Bret took the WCW deal and the rest is history. But of course, none of that is mentioned in this show. The episode also claimed Hart refused to drop the title to anyone (again, not true. Only Shawn. Bret even offered to lose it to Brooklyn Brawler if they wanted. In fact, Dave breaks down all the different scenarios that were presented here, and Bret was willing to lose the title to anyone other than Shawn, anywhere other than that show in Montreal, at any date before or after the PPV. They had actually presented Bret with dozens of different scenarios, all of which he agreed to, only for Vince to keep coming back around to Shawn at Survivor Series, which was the one and only thing Bret wouldn't budge on). They also tried to paint the picture that Bret could have taken the title to WCW the night after Survivor Series. In fact, Bret's WWF contract didn't end until Dec. 1st, and he was booked on more than a dozen house shows after Survivor Series and had even agreed to work the early December PPV because Bischoff had given his blessing. There was zero chance Bret was going to show up with the belt on Nitro. There was concern that Bischoff would go on Nitro the next day and announce he had signed Bret, and Dave says it's true that Bischoff certainly was planning to do that. But Bret had also asked Bischoff to hold off on the announcement and Bischoff had agreed. Vince knew about that too, but in recorded conversations with Bret (from the Wrestling With Shadows documentary), Vince didn't seem concerned since the word was already out and everyone knew Bret was leaving already. This just goes on and on. We all know the story already. Anyway, TL;DR - interesting show, but WWE's version of the story is bullshit. But we all knew that.
  • At the latest NJPW show, Antonio Inoki came out and cut a promo. He talked about being in attendance recently at the World Cup and said wrestling needs something like that. Inoki claimed he had put together a deal with WWE for a joint NJPW/WWE show to take place later in the year. Dave doesn't know if there's any truth to that story, but this is the first he's heard of it and he doesn't think it makes any sense for WWE so he's skeptical.
  • Usually in Japan, TV-Asahi airs the finals of NJPW's G1 Climax tournament live. But this year that may not happen, as they're looking at airing one of Inoki's MMA shows instead. This is a direct result of the terrible rating the recent Tokyo Dome show drew when it aired live. This company is struggling mightily lately.
  • Random news and notes: Inoki recently recruited a 23-year old Brazillian MMA fighter named Lyoto Machida to come to NJPW (he never really does anything in NJPW other than train at the dojo, but he had a long career in UFC and still fights for Bellator to this day). Dusty Rhodes is the new co-host of Turner South's Atlanta Braves pre-game show called "Hey The Braves Are Next!" Scott Hall will be working Insane Clown Posse's upcoming Gathering of the Juggalos event. Former WCW wrestler Evan Karagis recently filmed a role on the soap opera "Passions."
  • In the main event of FOX's Celebrity Boxing show, Chyna lost by decision to Joey Buttafuoco. Chyna's mystique of being a woman who only wants to compete with men got pretty much obliterated here, as the larger Buttafuoco manhandled her with ease for much of the match, which probably makes all those big tough wrestlers who sold for her feel kinda silly. But Buttafuoco came in as a hated heel to the audience and despite how she got pummeled, many people felt Buttafuoco was fighting dirty and cheating, so Chyna wasn't too hurt by it. She talked about wanting a rematch and Dave says if PRIDE really wants to break into the U.S. market, they could throw it onto one of their cards. Hey, this show did a really strong TV rating, maybe a rematch would be just the kind of freak-show attraction needed for PRIDE to get attention in the U.S. Nothing else they've tried has worked. Dave also suggests NWA-TNA could book it, but a worked wrestling match between the two probably wouldn't get as much media attention.
WATCH: Chyna vs. Joey Buttafuoco - Celebrity Boxing Match (2002)
  • Big Dick Dudley's ex-wife, former ECW valet Elektra, did an interview talking about his death. She said he'd had stomach pains all week and couldn't urinate. But didn't go to the doctor because he didn't think it was a big deal. Then at one point he got up to go to the bathroom but collapsed on the floor and died there on the spot. Jeez. At the time of his death, he had lost over 100 pounds from his peak weight of 320 in ECW several years ago.
  • Vince Russo is going to be writing a book about his time in WWF. Due to legal reasons and the ongoing lawsuit, it won't include much about his WCW tenure (I think he's written a book or two, but I've never read them, so if anyone has any insight, feel free to share).
  • Shaun Assael's book "Sex, Lies, & Headlocks: The Real Story of Vince McMahon and the World Wrestling Federation" will be published next month and is getting strong early reviews. Dave has talked to several of the people who spoke with Assael for the book and some of them expect it to be good while others feel that Assael fell victim to the cons and charms of wrestlers who were working him. We shall see, says Dave.
  • The debut NWA-TNA PPV will feature some sort of tournament to crown a new NWA champion. Dan Severn is no longer the champion after not agreeing to work the show (he already had a prior MMA booking for that date in New Mexico). As a result, the NWA (which is now working with TNA) just stripped him of the belt, which is convenient because they didn't really want to use Severn anyway, so now they can do whatever they originally planned to do with the belt without having to book an excuse to get it off him. The Jarretts and this new promotion now have full control over both the NWA world and tag team titles.
  • Mike Tenay has been named the lead announcer for the new NWA-TNA promotion. They're also trying to get Lex Luger to appear for the debut show, but Dave thinks its unlikely since Luger is financially set for life and has shown no interest in doing any wrestling since WCW folded.
  • Jeff Jarrett had talks with Bret Hart about coming in to do a Team Canada gimmick. Latest Dave heard is that Hart isn't interested, but they may bring in some of the new generation of Harts for it. There's been talk of bringing in TJ Wilson, Harry Smith, and Teddy Hart as a new version of the group. Smith is still only 16 and it's way too early to put him on the national stage yet and in a lot of states, he wouldn't even legally be allowed to perform. Wilson is also a teenager, from a bad home who pretty much grew up as an honorary Hart member in the Hart household. And Teddy Hart is a natural in-ring performer who would already be in WWE if not for the fact that during his two training camp tryouts, he had behavioral incidents both times. But they're all talented and will likely be big stars in the future. Last time WWE was in Calgary, Vince McMahon personally requested to meet with all 3 of them for a private tryout, but it didn't amount to anything.
  • Little bit of a change in the WWF writing teams. Brian Gewertz is now the official head writer for Raw, while Paul Heyman is the lead writer for Smackdown. Stephanie McMahon will continue to oversee creative for both shows and, of course, Vince still has final say on everything. Dave expects this to result in Raw being a more comedic show while Smackdown will be the more serious in-ring product (pretty much, yeah. And thus, we have the official beginning of Heyman-era Smackdown and soon we'll see the birth of the Smackdown Six).
  • Notes from Raw: show opened with Chris Benoit making his unannounced return to a huge pop. Dave still expects Benoit to eventually be managed by Arn Anderson, which has been the plan for months (and never happens). That was actually the original plan before the NWO was brought in. If Benoit was healthy in time (which, turned out he wasn't so it didn't matter anyway), the original idea was Benoit vs. Austin at Wrestlemania 18 with Anderson managing Benoit. But that obviously all changed. Anyway, what else? Dave once again mentions that Jeff Hardy looks physically awful. He seems to know about Hardy's drug issues and seems to be hinting about it without saying it. Tommy Dreamer continued his gross gimmick by drinking Undertaker's tobacco spit. Lesnar beat Bubba Ray Dudley but had to sell a ton in the match and Dave doesn't get it. For a guy that they so clearly want to turn into a Goldberg-like star, selling for midcarders every week isn't how Goldberg got over. Jim Ross went on and on about how Lesnar has never been pinned, which Dave says is an insult to all the fans who have seen Lesnar do jobs at house shows. RVD beat Eddie Guerrero in a 20+ minute ladder match and Dave says it's the longest match on Raw in at least a year. Dave gives it 4 stars and considering how messy and sloppy it was, that shows you how good it was. Lots of dangerous spots, some botched moves, and most notably a moment when a fan ran into the ring and knocked over the ladder while Eddie was climbing up. Eddie and Earl Hebner started stomping the fan until security dragged him out. Still an awesome match though. And finally, Benoit returned at the end of the show and turned heel on Austin. Dave says Benoit actually isn't ready yet and isn't supposed to be back in the ring until July, but the company is so desperate for anything to give them a shot in the arm that they may have pulled the trigger on this angle early.
WATCH: Fan shoves Eddie Guerrero off the ladder
  • Notes from Smackdown: the only thing Dave talks about is the Hulk Hogan retirement angle they did and he's got mixed feelings on it. First the positive: he gives Hogan credit for being an absolutely incredible performer when the heat is on. And Hogan gave a tremendous performance in this and Dave doesn't let it go unrecognized. But then the negative: in the promo, Hogan talked at length about when his dad was dying, he was basically expressionless except for Monday and Thursday nights when he'd watch WWF and his face would light up. So Hogan said his dad's last words were he wanted to see his son return to the WWF. So that's all sweet and nice, right? Weeeeeell....Hogan has told a different version of this story in the past. In previous interviews, Hogan said his dad was disgusted by what wrestling had become and he wanted Hogan to "clean it up." The idea that he was laying in the hospital and only coming to life when his beloved WWF was on doesn't exactly jibe with what Hogan has said before. And no matter what the truth is, Dave is uncomfortable Hogan using his dead dad as a way to get this storyline over, but hey, he ain't the first and won't be the last.
  • WWE's first show in Hawaii in probably 15 years is scheduled for later this month. Rock is scheduled to work the show and tickets sold out 2 hours after they went on sale. While we're at it, the Australia show in August also sold out the 47,000-seat Colonial Stadium in Melbourne in only 4 days. Once they scale the stadium for production, they plan to open up more seats.
  • It's "basically a sure thing" that Hogan vs. Vince McMahon will be one of the top matches at Summerslam. How they get there seems to change weekly. There's been talks of having Hogan take time off after King of the Ring and return for the Vince match at Summerslam. There's also been talk of him sticking around through the entire summer. So who knows? (Ended up being a mixture of both: Hogan stuck around the entire summer, but then he did an angle to get written off TV right before Summerslam. And he didn't come back until early 2003. And, of course, we got the Hogan/Vince match at Wrestlemania)
  • More info on the incident from a couple weeks ago where Kevin Nash and X-Pac reportedly threw a fit and got the script changed. They were told by writer Ed Koskey what the plans were for them on the show. Nash and X-Pac didn't like it, especially X-Pac since it involved him doing 2 jobs during the same show. X-Pac said he was quitting and told Nash he'd meet him in the car. Nash told Shane McMahon he'd go calm X-Pac down and straighten everything out. Nash and X-Pac came back, had meetings with Shane and Jim Ross, and then later with Koskey and Brian Gewertz (who wrote the show). They managed to convince the writers to change it more to their liking. Nash was also upset about how Ric Flair went on TV and said he'd fired Scott Hall. Nash didn't like the idea of Flair on TV being able to hire and fire people from their NWO, because that kinda takes away from the idea of the NWO as an autonomous, outsider group that doesn't play by WWE's rules. So that's why Nash was able to go out on TV on this night and cut the promo about how Flair doesn't control the NWO. Of course, Hall is still gone, so I guess he still does. Anyway, both Nash and X-Pac were pissed over all this and caused a scene, especially X-Pac, to the point others in the locker room wondered why they weren't disciplined instead of being given their way. But if you wonder that, you clearly ain't been paying attention to Nash over the years. Anyway, X-Pac still did the job in the Hardyz match, but not in the second match.
  • Random news: house shows in Alexandria and Baton Rouge, LA were both canceled this weekend due to low ticket sales. Shit's selling out in record time in Australia and Hawaii, but they can't give tickets away in Louisiana apparently. Undertakers hips were both banged up after the Hogan match at the PPV but he continued working, although he was limited (and years later, he'd have to get major surgery on both those hips). At Raw in Edmonton, Ric Flair was getting huge pops and "woo!" chants for him before the show started, so they filmed a backstage segment where he told Arn Anderson how much he hates Edmonton so they would boo him when he came out live. Lance Cade won the HWA title from Johnny the Bull down in developmental. WWF was pushing the city of Edmonton to present Benoit with the key to the city on Raw, but Edmonton wasn't so keen on the idea. And finally, during a bikini contest at the house show in Winnipeg, Ivory's top got pulled down, exposing her boob, much to the delight of many in the crowd.
  • Remember how MTV's The Osbournes was the only show routinely beating Raw in the cable ratings? That's changing. The Osbournes is over for the season, but this week, Raw fell to #4 behind the Lakers/Spurs NBA playoff game and 2 different episodes of SpongeBob. Patrick's a draw, brother.
  • Raven has been doing commentary on Sunday Night Heat, but he recently asked to be removed from it because he feels like it hurts his wrestling character. Dave thinks this is pretty risky. Raven as a wrestler is probably nearing the end of his shelf-life and lord knows WWE hasn't shown any desire to push him. And he was actually pretty fantastic at commentary. So giving up a safe job that he was excelling at for one that WWE doesn't really seem to see any value in him for seems like a good way to find yourself on the chopping block next time they decide to get rid of some people (yup, he'll be gone from the company in another 7 months or so). For what it's worth though, this isn't the first time Raven has been in this situation. Back in the 90s, he was a manager and commentator in WWF then too, under the name Johnny Polo. But when they weren't interested in using him as a wrestler, he quit the company and reinvented himself in ECW as Raven. Sometimes you gotta bet on yourself.
  • Jim Ross has a weekly WWE.com article where he usually just shares all the latest injuries everyone has. This leads Dave on a bit of a tangent when Ross wrote about how Triple H has a fractured patella. The injury was diagnosed by Dr. James Andrews in Birmingham and Andrews told Triple H to be careful with it, but he could continue wrestling as long as he can take the pain. Basically one of the world's top sports doctors saying, "Yeah you've got a broken knee, but throw some dirt on it, you'll be fine." It's no wonder so many of these guys end up on pain pills rather than getting the medical treatment they need.
  • Also in his article, Jim Ross admitted that the WWE is not doing a good job lately of providing a product the fans want to see. Dave thinks that's just about as strong a statement he's heard on the current state of WWE from someone so high up within the company. Ross admitted they need to create new rivalries, elevate new young talent, and effectively introduce new stars. However, Ross also blamed the economy and the abnormally high number of injuries everyone is dealing with right now for part of the problems too. Dave says the economy may play a small role in the declining live event and PPV numbers, but usually when the economy is in the toilet, TV ratings go up because people are staying home more. Not the case here. Injuries, yes that's a problem for sure. But the core of all WWE's problems right now comes down to the simple fact that the show pretty much sucks. And at least someone high up in the office seems to finally be publicly admitting it.
  • Tough Enough 2 is down to the final four. Dave talks about how Jackie Gayda is now the sentimental favorite because she tore her ACL during the show but has still refused to quit, which opened a lot of eyes on her. Speaking of Tough Enough, in a WCW-like comedy of errors, they aired a promo for next week's episode before the current episode was finished, thus spoiling who the final 4 were going to be, before it was revealed on the show people were watching.
  • The WWF Forceable Entry album has sold around 364,000 copies total since its release. But it's actually considered a pretty huge failure because WWF had to pay so much money in fees and up front advances to the various artists on the album, and they're nowhere close to recouping that cost. (The album eventually sells over 500,000 and goes gold but still a flop).
NEXT WEDNESDAY: A look at the dismal state of WWE in 2002, Tough Enough II finale, Riki Choshu's departure from NJPW, Dave reviews several new wrestling books, and more...
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