Any INTP knows the odds are against them all the time and that is enough to deter them. But I've always been a gambler. In middle school I got a multigame mini pool table, table tennis, and Roulette wheel and card table. My friends would come over and gamble money or things. My friend's mom disapproved and made him give me some stuff back (haha). I just didn't know I had to rake games to be "the house." In middle school the black kids taught white kids craps and we'd shoot for dollars. I still love a good dice game. We'd have them on payday after close a couple jobs ago. The shit talking is so much better than poker games.
In HS I gambled poker and chess a lot. My favorite poker game was played where everyone had 2.25g of shrooms in them. No poker faces and it didn't last that long. Not great at poker. I've gambled on Chess pretty successfully. Not great at Spades.
But I'm an INTP and Casinos aren't my thing. Rather gamble at pool at a dive bar.
That said I'm doing a lot of sports betting right now. I once read that a professional sports gambler only wins 55% of the time but they have advanced knowledge in props, parlays, hedging etc. I just figured at college and to a lesser extent pro football, I could pick the winner above 55% maybe even against against--the-spread. My favorite former gf was good at betting on the ponies because she was into horses and leased one, so she had similar inside knowledge as someone who's watched football for 25yrs
I put $150 deposit and got $165 because they passed some BTC savings onto me. First week I bet the full $165. I remember the bets too. $45 on Duke (Lost but beat the spread) Same with the $45 I put on S. Alabama. $45 on Coastal Carolina who won outright against Kansas $45. Because the house rakes the games I'd only win about $40 off each so that's $270. But I put a $30 parlay on all three winning and won $180. Turned $165 into $360 (not exact--change and some numbers were rounded). I qualified for a bonus $165 for betting everything. That's a cool $425.
I thought "Holy Shit I can just go pro" beginners luck. It was also right after I lost my job and I'm moving for a new one mid October. Back to my home city and old neighborhood. Pretty psyched really except moving is a hassle.
Two weeks ago lost $70. I thought that comes with the territory of a pro sports better. I broke even last week. This week I chose a new strategy and bet on 7 games instead of 3. Truth was I don't know a certain percentage. I know games I "know" but I only lost $60. It just feels worse because I went 1-6 instead of two weeks ago when I went 1-2. Plus I lose some change on the low probability parlays.
The problem is that I just dipped into my other $165 to bet on pro football. Put in a couple bets and a parlay. The winnings get transferred into my main account. I'm still up either $80 in my account (I can't cash in the "free money")
My floor is $200 because I wanna make at least $50 off this fun lil exercise but I see how addictive it is for the first time. I even sought out a Bitcoin chess gambling site mainly used by Africans but I don't play because either I'm not better at Chess than Nigerian Royalty or they use chess bots or both. It also was pretty obviously used for money laundering which is what the gambling sites are also used for. Now I'm betting on Sunday football. Not just Saturday.
I guess my cashout ceiling is a grand but I don't see that happening haha.
Point is that wk2 college football this year was like my first joint, the first time I mixed valium-codeine-and a belt of scotch at 14. The first time I painted something halfway decent under a bridge at 16. The first time I fucked a girl at 17. The first time I had an audience in stitches at 22 (standup). All very pleasurable and only relatively routinely done. Except maybe sex and drugs but they have other major downsides.
Hell when I learned to read at 8 I was attached to books my whole life but nobody thinks that's bad. Haha.
Do other people gamble?
I'm extraverted enough that if someone has dice on the street I'll shoot or if they have a chess game at a coffee shop. I'll bet $20.
Best in person bet was with a frenemy in my group who was the epitome of iamverysmart and everyone in my group thought he was a genius. I took $20 off him in front of everyone and he refused to try to win it back. Bad look for him.
I hope I can keep it just for fun. Any other INTP gamblers on here?
Edit: Forgot to mention I won $400+ in a $20 pool for the 2011 March Madness B-Ball tourney. I watched none of the regular season (like usual) but knew UConn was good but nobody picked them as they were a #3 seed. I didn't win most rounds either. Dumb luck. It's funny that I forgot because it was less recent than that grudge match against that guy I played chess against.

Disclosure: This is not a comprehensive breakdown, and it's not meant to be. Just some key points and context that I thought you'd find interesting.
DraftKings is technology stock meets gambling
Three main products: Daily fantasy sports or DFS, Sportsbook, iGaming
DFS is OG DraftKings. Fantasy sports are where players make fantasy teams and battle each other to win money. However, sportsbook is where the money is: betting actual money on actual sports against the house. iGaming is basically an online casino with some online games you can gamble on, in addition to the classics like blackjack and Russian roulette.
In addition to DraftKings, there’s also SBTech, the online gambling technology company that had an arranged marriage as part of the DKNG merger.
Landmark Case
In 2018, the Supreme Court knocks down the federal law prohibiting sports gambling throughout the United States. Pandora’s box is open. Each state has to decide what it wants to do with gambling on its own.
The Path to Legalization
Map of Sportsbook legality
DFS legality is more widespread
Currently, 36% of the USA population lives in a state with some form of legal gambling and 24% in a state with legal online gambling. The population living where DraftKings is live or going live is only 13% of the country. There’s a lot of ground to cover.
NJ is the posterchild for sports betting legalization at the moment, and it’s DraftKings promised land. Generating 30% of DraftKings total revenue, it is a testament to the money waiting to be made if sports betting is made fully legal.
The Risks for DraftKings
Regulation: Gambling is a money-maker, but it’s also a social disease. States will want to cash in with taxes of 6.8 to 36% but it will be a tough battle to make it happen. And that battle will unfold state by state. Just like with the marijuana industry, the fate of the market is undeniably shaped by how legalization unfolds. It could end up being a niche hobby in select states, or it could end up like gambling in the United Kingdom, where there’s a gambling shop on every corner. Or there could be a huge gambling market, but one that is monopolized by the States exclusively. If they’re going to allow gambling, why not take all the profits, right?
Competition: FanDuel and DraftKings once considered a merger before the FTC played tough. Now, together they own 95% of the DFS market in the USA with a slight majority going to DraftKings. However, there will be fierce competition as new states open up, and missteps could be stifling for either company in the early stages. The lifeblood fueling this battle? Cold hard cash burned up in advertising and incentivizing dollars. Maybe it’s not as bad as Uber since gambling has a chance at being profitable, but if you don’t like to see money burning, think twice about entering the online sports betting market over this coming decade.
Technology: The hardware of gambling is a liability. Paying for the bandwidth needed at the exact moment of a match when everybody checks their bet is expensive. Payment processing, user validation, server hosting, sports data, app store placement: these are all areas of vulnerability and cost that you can minimize but can’t eliminate. With SBTech in the fold, having complete vertical integration is the aim and strength of DraftKings.
The House Always Wins…Usually: Writing bets means risk. Thankfully, the DFS is player versus player, so DraftKings always wins, taking something like EDIT: up to 15% of what players put in. It's a bookkeeper's wet dream. But Sportsbook and iGaming have classic gambling risks which should be fine over the long-term.
The Good Side (and Oh God They’re Beautiful)
Growth Potential: It’s a technology stock. The PE Ratio is over 600. When you buy DraftKings, you’re buying the dream of an America where gambling is as American as the Ford F150. A matured Sportsbook market in the USA would be around $20 billion, about $85 per adult. It’s a beautiful untapped (and non-existent) market with lots of money waiting to be taken. With Coronavirus, the slice of the sports betting pie that goes digital is bound to be more than ever before, if the sports happen
COVID19: The only thing that can stop a sports betting company from making money is getting rid of sports. Thankfully, new sports like Table Tennis, eSports, and a host of other betting topics have allowed DraftKings to get by. With lots of cash on hand ($450 million plus) and a monthly burn of $15 million, there’s enough to weather the storm. And if sports reopen with empty stadiums, fans may turn to online gambling to get their authentic sport experience.
Turnaround Time: The largest expense that DraftKings has is conquering new markets. Every time a state opens up, it’s a massive investment. That’s why analysts and executives don’t think DraftKings will run net positive for years to come. However, DraftKings experience in New Jersey has shown an average turnaround time of about two years is all it takes to recoup their initial investment when entering a new market. Some pretty tasty data to have coming in.
The Numbers
Revenue was up to $323 million in 2019 from $226 million and $191 million the years prior. NJ made up $86 million of that, growing by 8.5x after sports betting legalization in late 2018 to make up over a quarter of revenue in 2019.
Net loss however was $146 million in 2019 from $76 million and $73 million the years prior. Cost of Revenue was $103 million, Sales and Marketing was $185 million, Product and Tech was $55 million, and General and Administrative was $124 million of that. DraftKings has never been in the green. They attribute the accelerated burn in 2019 to growth in new markets so whether its aggressive or reckless is up to you. To be fair, if you’re investing in this stock, you should be expecting them to burn every single dollar they get at this point.
Average monthly unique players was up to 684k in 2019 from 601k and 574k with the average revenue per monthly unique player up to $39 from $31 and $28. As of March 31st 2020, there were 720k monthly unique players with average revenue of $41 per. So continued growths in the midst of the early Coronavirus pandemic. Q2 will be revealing for certain.
The stock just skyrocketed to $34+ yesterday meaning a market cap of over $10 billion and a PE ratio of over 600. Take it for what it’s worth to you.
Some Quirks
DraftKings revenue is seasonal. Q4 is the best when the NFL and NBA coincide, with Q3 and Q1 being roughly equivalent, and Q2 basically being garbage. With COVID mainly taking out Q2, perhaps there’s hope for sports by Q3 and Q4 to hit those high-earning months?
Controlled Structure: You get 1 vote for 1 stock, but CEO and Founder Jason Robins gets 10 votes for each stock. So whatever you do, he has 90% of the voting power. Good for long-term growth in a highly reactive landscape, but being powerless is never a fun feeling.
SBTech offers B2B solutions for other gambling companies looking to offer online sports betting and iGaming, so there’s that added benefit. In fact, the share of B2B has been growing from 1% in 2018 to 5% in 2019, so some diversification is happening.
DraftKings’s ticker symbol DKNG reminds me of Donkey Kong

Both of these games are the same, by the same company. You can do both offers, and if you haven't completed these offers previously, I highly recommend nabbing this easy $100.
If you want to complete easily, play Slots until lv 65. At level 65, you'll need about 200-300m chips to hit 150. You can either gamble for the chips, or buy them with money. Ideally, you'll hit a moderate or large jackpot around 65-70 or so to give you a good chip boost. Note: if you purchase chips with money, the amount you get from your offer depends on your current level. Your first purchase is also considerably larger than subsequent purchase offers, so keep that in mind as well.
If you want to go the 100% pure free route, pray you win a decent jackpot at the 60+ level range. Usually playing the 1m slots will eventually nab you a 100-200m payout. They give away chips on their Facebook page daily. Joining a high ranking active club can also net you a tidy sum of chips. My advice is if you are utterly broke on chips and don't want to insert coin, use the free daily FB chips, the club chips, the free chips from the 15m timer, and the shop chips. Accumulate about 30-40m, then sit and play some 1m slots of your choice. I heard Wizard of Oz and Sky Gods are both decent payers.
After you have enough chips, sit at the Roulette table for 10m. Make sure to sit at a private table (hold down the table button to select a Private Table) so it goes quicker. Bet 5m black and 5m red. Repeat (use the Rebet function) until you are the desired level. You will lose 5% of the time, but you're playing to tie and regain your 10m bet rather than outright win. You'll also gain some chips by leveling, and every level after 80 will result in a 5 min 2x XP buff which will accumulate, since it takes less than 5 minutes to level.
Getting to 150/160 takes about 6-8 hours. Getting to 200 will take you 20-24 or so. If you are doing lv 200, I highly suggest saving your bronze Lottery Tickets for when you need a break. There's a 24hr 2x XP buff in those that you can win. Also, Lottery Ticket prizes increase in amount depending on your current level. Don't use them early!
I finished both HUUUUGE and Billionarie in a day each. https://imgur.com/yAidtvX
Good luck!

Here are some tips for those who are are working on Huuuge Casino. The tips also apply to Billionaire Casino.
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1. Make sure to get Free chips (ex. site)
2. Join a club that is atleast level 20 that completes daily events.
   1. You can use the Advanced Search to specify level. I would also recommend increasing the member size too.
   2. Collect Free chips from the Club Wall as they become available
3. While playing slots, send Likes and Connect with others as new players show up.
   1. This will increase how many Daily Chips you get (max 100 likes, max 25 friends)
   2. You can also bulk send Connect requests to all members of your Club once you join one
4. Collect Free chips from the Shop
   1. Lower right corner, on timer
5. Collect Free chips from Betty Bonus
   1. Lower left corner of lobby, on timer
6. Collect and save your lottery tickets until atleast level 100
   1. The lottery prizes increase once you hit level 100. ( u/JefeTomas12 )
   2. You should always see a timer going on the lottery button for earning another lottery ticket. If you don't, enter the lottery area and then exit to get the timer going again.
7. Use Baccarat or Roulette to grind
   1. It is usually recommended to reach level 65 before doing baccarat or roulette because that is when the 10M betting table opened up. Even before 65 I would use the these to get the most out of my 5min x2 XP boosts.
   2. Always start a private room. To do this, go to the menu with the roulette table options. Hold your finger on a table and a pop up will appear with an option of creating a private table. This will significantly speed things up as you wont have to wait for other players to bet!
   3. Baccarat has slightly better odds at keeping your money for longer, however I felt that it was much slower per game even with a private room. It also looks like baccarat gives less XP per 10M bet then Roulette, but I did not verify the exact amount. I estimated almost hafl. I would recommended Roulette during x2 XP if you have the chip cushion at the very least.
      1. Baccarat = (.458 banker win odds * .975) + (.446 player win odds * 1) + (.096 tie odds * 1) = .989 average percentage of bet won
      2. Roulette = (.947 red or black win odds * 1) + (.053 0 or 00 win odds * 00 = .947 average percentage of bet won
   4. For roulette:
      1. Choose your total bet amount and place 1/2 on Red and 1/2 on Black. You will have a high probability of getting your money back with this method to allow for longer grinding. You will only lose if the wheel hits 0 or 00.
   5. For baccarat:
      1. Choose your total bet amount and place 1/2 on Player and 1/2 on Bank. You will have a high probability of getting all your money back with this method to allow for longer grinding. You will only lose a small amount of money in the case of the Bank winning (250,000 on a 10M total bet).
8. ALWAYS utilize x2 XP power ups, even at lower levels
   1. This is the time to add a bit of risk for a higher reward, especially when betting on roulette where the risk is far less. Max out betting on roulette as much as you can, its worth it, especially if it means you level up and get the next level's rewards.
   2. From u/Greenoverzz: If you have x2 XP for 5 minute, click the spin button instead of auto as it tends to be faster
   3. You can get x2 XP for 24 hours from the lottery wheel, which is the best reward by far ( u/JefeTomas12 )
   4. From levels 1-80, you will receive a 5 minute x2 XP boost every 5 levels. Starting at level 81, you will receive a 5 minute x2 XP boost every level. It is good to plan for this. If you have the chips for it, you can use that x2 XP boost plus betting 10M on roulette to shoot you from 81 to approximately 125 without running out of XP boost.

If you're looking at a level 200 offer from Huuuge Casino, it is really difficult even with the above tips to complete in 7 days. It might be possible in a 14+ day window. Obviously you can make it easier by spending a little money, but I don't like making tip guides based on spending money. That's probably just me.
If you do want to spend money, your first purchase is discounted so make it count! u/TheOofsterInTF2 commented that once you reach level 100 or so, you will get a $8.99 800+ million chip pack offer. If you are interested in getting this pack, remember to not make any other purchases before this. They reached level 200 in 6 days (see their post here). They also commented they had to grind 15+ min per level towards the end, which is really mind numbing to me. If you want to spend less, there should be a $1.99 option with a couple million chips and a lot of bronze tickets ( u/JefeTomas12 ). The tickets can help complete the bronze puzzle or score you that x2 24hr XP boost!
Enjoy and Good Luck!

Last updated 2:00 EST, 27 July
^{RIP my inbox}
All new posts asking about information already provided here will be removed and redirected here to reduce redundancy.

Release

As of 5:15 EST, the update has released on PS4, Xbox One, and PC.

• 3.4GB on PS4
• 3.2GB on Xbox One
• 2.9GB on Steam
• 2.6GB on Social Club.

On the note of releases... Some countries will not be able to access certain content from this update due to gambling laws. Thankfully though, players from these countries will still be allowed to download the update in general.

Money for Diamond Casino

For ways to make money to afford the new DLC content, along with methods to make an empty lobby to do CEO/MC work, check the Mega Guide.
Tips

• You only need $50,000 to register as a VIP! If you have at least that much, you can register as a VIP for 4 hours and get access to VIP missions (which can be done in an invite only session), giving you a lucrative way to save up.
• If you own both a crate warehouse and vehicle warehouse, you could use them together to make more money overtime than you could by using either exclusively. Use your sourcing/exports between crate pickups and sales, and you'll be getting the best of both worlds, gaining from the postive money-making aspects of both.

Content and Prices

Content that has initially released with the update.

Southern San Andreas Super Autos

• Weeny Issi Sport - $897,000
• Vapid Caracara 4x4 - $875,000

Legendary Motorsport

• Annis S80RR: $2.6million
• Enus Paragon R: $905,000
• Obey 8F Drafter: $718,000
• Truffade Thrax: $2.3million

Penthouses

• Cash Pad: $1.5million
• Party Penthouse: $3.78million
• High Roller: $6.5million
• "Design Your Own": $1.5million

Penthouse Customizations

• Colour options: $215,000 or $258,500
• Pattern options: $92,000 - $210,000

Penthouse Addons

• Lounge Area: $400,000
• Media Room: $500,000
• Spa: $800,000
• Bar and Party Hub: $700,000
• Private Dealer: $1.1million
• Office: $200,000
• Extra Bedroom: $200,000
• Garage: $800,000

Gambling

As this is a Casino-centric update, there's plenty of ways to gamble away your hard-grinded money.
The gambling in this game centers around a new form of currency, called Chips. These chips are pretty much like real-world gambling chips, with a one-to-one dollar value, except you keep your chips when you leave the casino. Chips are an actual currency in GTA Online, as they can be used to purchase exclusive items from a shop inside the casino, along with being used to bet with when playing the Gambling Games, listed below

• Slot Machines: There's plenty of options to choose from, but they all perform the same way. Spend some chips, and let the RNG decide whether or not you earn anything from it.
• Blackjack: Casino style blackjack with up to four simultaneous players, all of which play against the dealer. Anyone who beats the dealer individually wins, anyone who the dealer beats individually loses, and if the dealer gets Blackjack (an Ace and 10/face-card), everyone immediately loses. Assuming your initial hand isn't a Blackjack, you have the option of doubling-down, which doubles your initial bet with the caveat of only being able to hit once.
• Poker: Three-card poker. You make your bets, check your hand, and similar to Blackjack, each player wins if their hand is better than the dealer's, and the dealer beats whoever has a worse hand than him. While there is no option to double-down, how much you win does depend on how good of a hand you have. The better your hand, the more you win. Also, while you can fold your hand, you lose your initial bet anyway.
• Horse Racing: Pretty much standard horse racing bettering. You choose a horse, you put your money down, and if you bet correctly, you get double the amount you bet in return. Otherwise, you just lose the amount you bet.

To gain more chips, there is a counter inside the casino where you can buy them, however you are limited in how many you can buy per day (real-world 24 hours). As standard, you can buy a maximum of 20,000 chips per day, but if you own a penthouse of any tier, you can buy up to 50,000 chips per day. Chips can also be traded in for money, but there does not appear to be a limit on this. No matter how many chips you win from gambling, it appears that you can trade them all in at once for the equivalent dollar value.
Lastly, there is the Wheel. It's a roulette wheel that you can only spin once per day, which costs $500 per spin. There are twenty reward slots, and since some rewards are in multiple slots, they have greater chances of being selected. The biggest note about this wheel however is that there is one slot in which you can win a free car! What makes this so significant is that since the car takes a 1/20 slot on the wheel, that means you still have a 5% chance of winning a free high-value vehicle! Compared to most online games, that's pretty much the most generous RNG you can get.

Business and Missions

coming soon

FAQ

Are there any differences between the penthouses
For once, yes! Well, technically... they're the same basic property layout, but each option gives you different addon options.

• The Cash Pad: The basic Penthouse with no property addons available . You cannot purchase a garage, extra bedroom, lounge, etc. with the Cash Pad. You can, however, purchase penthouse customizations (colour and wall patterns).
• The Party Penthouse: Gives you certain of the addon options: the main Penthouse, the Extra Bedroom, the Lounge Area, the Spa, and the Bar and Party Hub. You are locked to these options, no more, no less.
• The High Roller: Gives you all of the property addons as standard, and the most expensive penthouse customization options... this means that you cannot choose your own colour and wall patterns with this version.
• The "Design Your Own": ...What should be the standard option. It gives you the basic penthouse and allows you to choose which addons and customizations you want, with an extra cost for each one, of course. Just get this one. You can also renovate this option later, allowing you to purchase more addons and change your customizations later.

What do the Penthouse Addons do?

• Lounge Area: Allows you to purchase the other Penthouse Addons (except for the Extra Bedroom and Garage, which are the only items addons that can be purchased without a Lounge).
• Media Room: You know the cinemas around Los Santos? The ones that play a few 5 minute animated films on repeat? That, but in a Penthouse.
• Spa: Gives you access to a hot tub and a Personal Stylist. The Stylist's services are the same as the ones spread around Los Santos (hair, contacts, and make up), but they're all free.
• Bar and Party Hub: Allows you to consume drinks that instantly intoxicate your character, along with access to special arcade games that aren't available anywhere else in the game.
• Private Dealer: Allows you to play gambling games in your penthouse.
• Office: Adds a standard computer, a Gun Locker, and a money vault (don't get excited, it's just aesthetic).
• Extra Bedroom: Bedrooms in owned properties in GTA Online are used as spawn points, so why can you pay to have an extra one? Because you can now allow a friend of yours to claim it! The Extra Bedroom allows a friend of yours to use your penthouse as a spawn apparently, though the exact implementation of this is not completely clear.
• Garage: Access to the Penthouse's garage bay.

How do I get the armored car?

• To recieve the Enus Paragon R (Armoured), you have to complete the Diamond Casino's mission series, which you must own a penthouse to access. Once of the missions are complete, you'll be given the vehicle for free! But remember, it's uninsured and you only get it once, so immediately go into passive mode and take it to the nearest Los Santos Customs to insure it, or else you could lose the vehicle permanently.

Passive Mode

Good news, passive mode has been fixed!

• Passive Mode can now no longer be active when using a weaponized vehicle
• A Passive Mode cooldown of 2 minutes is now in place for players who have just killed another player
• Players now must wait 5 minutes before they can activate Passive Mode again after disabling it
• Players now must wait 30 seconds before they can disable Passive Mode after activating it

These changes make is so that grievers can no longer abuse passive mode, or at least no where near as easily. If you start to get the upper-hand on a griefer and destroy whatever death-machine they're using to troll you, or if you confront them in a death-machine of your own, they can't abuse Passive Mode to try to get the upper-hand on you!

Solo Session

Check the Mega Guide for ways to push yourself into a public Online session with no one else in it. Keep in mind that some missions and abilities are unavailable if there's no one else with you though!

Bugs and Glitches

• Apparently on PS4 and Xbox One, you must have full size of GTA V available to download the update, so if you have less than ~60GB free, you may have trouble downloading the update. This does not mean that the entire game is re-downloaded, it just means that the update may not download if you don't have that much space available.

Credits

Special Thanks: u/Rebored_Warrior - Sent me the official patch notes link!

• u/LordMcze - Information on countries that restrict players from gambling functions.

Bookmakers Not On Gamstop

Bookmakers Not on GamStop:>https://gamstopbookmakers.com
The bookmakers on this site are not licensed by the UK Gambling Commission, therefore they are not obligated to operate by the strict UK government guidelines. Instead, they are regulated by the gambling authorities like MGA (Malta Gambling Authority) or the Isle of Man Gambling Supervision Commission.
So what does this mean?
Bookmakers not on Gamstop can offer great offers and bonuses to play on their sites as they do not come under the strict rules of the UK Gambling Commission. These bonuses can be very attractive and rewarding, such as no deposit offers or lucrative matched deposits. Many UK players enjoy the freedom and high bonuses bookmakers not on Gamstop have to offer for joining their site.
The Top 6
Here we have hand picked the top 6 casinos not on Gamstop. Theses casinos have been calculated on the following:

• Welcome Bonuses
• Existing Player Bonuses
• Online Reviews
• Casino Layout and Accessibility

​
Bookmakers Not on GamStop:> https://gamstopbookmakers.com
What is GamStop?
Gamstop is a self-exclusion scheme introduced in April 2020 by the UK government that allows players to block themselves from any gambling activity. Due to the pressures placed on UK bookmakers by the UK Gambling Commission, they are restricted to what bonuses they can offer new customers.
Since bookmakers in the UK cannot operate unless licensed by the UK Gambling Commission, this will have a huge impact on the gambling industry. Gamstop was originally created so that players could take control of their gambling habits.
Once you have signed up to Gamstop and excluded yourself from gambling activity, the gambling companies you are registered to will automatically be notified and then close all accounts related to your name and prevent you from signing back in. Furthermore, as of April 2020, the UK Gambling Commission have places restrictions on players depositing on credit cards, an setting deposit limit amounts which cannot be exceeded in a specific time frame.
Due to the pressures placed on UK gambling companies by the UK Gambling Commission, this has had a significant affect on what offers and bonuses the gambling companies can now offer. The gambling industry has taken a devastating affect on enticing more customers to play on their sites.
Gambling companies under the UK Gambling Commission such as; WilliamHill, Coral, Betway, to name a few are restricted to offer new customers no deposit offers or attractive bonuses to join their sites.
Benefits of Bookmakers Not on GamStop
Bookmakers not on Gamstop are not licensed by the UK Gambling Commission, therefore they are not obligated to operate by the strict UK government guidelines. Instead, they are regulated by the gambling authorities like MGA (Malta Gambling Authority) or the Isle of Man Gambling Supervision Commission.
So what does this mean?
Bookmakers not on Gamstop can offer great offers and bonuses to play on their sites as they do not come under the strict rules of the UK Gambling Commission. These bonuses can be very attractive and rewarding, such as no deposit offers or lucrative matched deposits. Many UK players enjoy the freedom and high bonuses bookmakers not on Gamstop have to offer for joining their site.
For more information visit:> https://gamstopbookmakers.com
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I saw this thread the other day about WallStreetBets awards and was asked to compile a list. I've gathered here a list of:

1. Top 50 WallStreetBets Gains of 2019
2. Top 50 WallStreetBetsLosses of 2019
3. Most winning tickers of 2019
4. Most losing tickers of 2019
5. Most upvoted YOLOs/Gains/Losses Reddit threads of 2019.

​
If you have the time you can sift through them and find some gems so you can vote at the link above. Enjoy!
​

Top Gains

AMD: $82.2mil of AMD in one year. Averag..., u/thesmd1 (Gains $1,020,000)
SHOP: I�m beginning to think holding Shop..., u/jimbeam145 (Gains $782,000)
AMD: Thanks AMD!, u/thesmd1 (Gains $725,442)
A before and after of one of my acc..., u/RazzleDazzle_ (Gains $640,000)
Slow & steady wins the race, u/b33f_c4ke (Gains $605,815)
ROKU: Out of $ROKU - wasn't able to hit 5..., u/hasbs (Gains $460,000)
FB: My FB tendies., u/urnotserious (Gains $407,000)
TSLA: whatcouldgowrong, u/tdking3523 (Gains $393,500)
FNMAS, u/TheSerpent (Gains $368,000)
AAPL: Shout out to the guy that told me t..., u/stormwillpass (Gains $350,000)
CRM: small winner, u/reddit1280819 (Gains $293,625)
SPY: SPY Puts - 277k Profit in 1 Minute..., u/analfarmer2 (Gains $277,109)
TSLA: Thanks Lord Elon for the 300k. Mayb..., u/7figurebetontesla (Gains $263,270)
ROKU: With my AAPL position losing me mon..., u/hasbs (Gains $250,000)
ROKU: Locked in 70% of my profits off ROK..., u/hasbs (Gains $250,000)
$240k from Papa Nutella and House o..., u/Momar11 (Gains $240,000)
ULTA: Please tell me what this will be wo..., u/Yocz23 (Gains $237,930)
DISH: Real gain porn. Up 50% all time. I ..., u/StreetAutist (Gains $228,000)
We've had so many loss porn threads..., u/Fausterion18 (Gains $220,000)
CI: Autist in my Discord YOLO�d $7k int..., u/thedogman420 (Gains $209,571)
DIS: Made $100k of DIS Calls today, u/fellowautists (Gains $200,000)
Am I doin it right?, u/ChuckJA (Gains $185,974)
ALGN: ALGN Play - 180k Profit in 5 Minute..., u/analfarmer2 (Gains $180,000)
GME: GME YOLO month-end update � Nov 201..., u/DeepFuckingValue (Gains $176,000)
CI: $CI is my bitch, u/lego3072 (Gains $172,494)
AMD: $AMD Gain Porn, u/HomoChef (Gains $170,000)
ULTA: Update on my ULTA puts, u/Yocz23 (Gains $170,000)
BYND: Cook & Hookers it is boys. Update o..., u/Fuyuki_Wataru (Gains $160,000)
Closed +150k/1000+%, don't want Tru..., u/Fausterion18 (Gains $150,000)
SPY: $100,000 in $SPY 11OCT 294P, u/-Hyre (Gains $145,802)
DIS: DIS YOLO., u/allofher (Gains $143,000)
PINS: Had a fight last week but the makeu..., u/Warbring3r (Gains $137,812)
Only 3 days after I took over my br..., u/YungBillionaire (Gains $133,901)
PINS: When you nut but she keep suckin' (..., u/Warbring3r (Gains $131,000)
TSLA: Gain porn? Don�t worry lost it all ..., u/quinwoodz (Gains $130,000)
Thank you fed and telfon don, u/World_Chaos (Gains $125,284)
AMZN: $AMZN made my day. Yikes, u/MoveGEtoWallSt (Gains $124,463)
QQQ: $70K -> $187K in one week. So glad ..., u/Power80770M (Gains $117,000)
GOOS: ...2 weeks later , u/vrmworld (Gains $101,000)
2019 good year so far with trading..., u/mysundaydriver (Gains $100,650)
Pretty good day and a pretty good m..., u/wins22x (Gains $100,000)
Like running through a minefield. A..., u/-Hyre (Gains $100,000)
Remember Who Brought You This Trade..., u/NOVACPA (Gains $100,000)
SPY: Do I sell?, u/World_Chaos (Gains $97,647)
ABBV: Practically in the red for a whole ..., u/butgerbollege (Gains $96,650)
I have been holding onto these opti..., u/MBA2016 (Gains $95,000)
NUGT: NUGT, the gift hat keeps on giving..., u/MBA2016 (Gains $95,000)
This year has been pretty good cons..., u/J_Powell_Ate_My_Ass (Gains $95,000)
SPY: Thank you big orange man!, u/Slyex (Gains $88,650)
SPY: From $30,000 on Tuesday to... (Part..., u/HomoChef (Gains $80,000)
NUGT: Gonna buy a golden dildo, u/one_roll (Gains $77,076)
​

Top Losses

SPY: 600k Yolo in FDs expiring tmrw.. if..., u/analfarmer2 (Losses -$599,880)
Came across this guy on blind. wya?..., u/mcdonalds_is_my_vice (Losses -$461,778)
Doubling Down Wasnt the Best Idea....., u/analfarmer2 (Losses -$231,000)
Gg seems like my ceiling was at 140..., u/SilentPhanto (Losses -$190,522)
I won�t be surprised if I�m at -$20..., u/woodc93 (Losses -$187,000)
SPY: I AIN'T DONE YET, u/-Hyre (Losses -$171,300)
TSLA: My friend lost $160k on Tesla Calls..., u/fellowautists (Losses -$160,000)
ATVI: Throwback to $ATVI Q3 Earnings Last..., u/ZombsCS (Losses -$148,400)
Once upon a Time, there was a autis..., u/SilentPhanto (Losses -$124,265)
SESN: Biotech DD for those who don�t know..., u/GhettoGainsGoblin (Losses -$113,000)
Stocktwits user claiming to be a fo..., u/DelonWright (Losses -$111,398)
FIT: Roast me for holding $FIT 200k shit..., u/kodbell (Losses -$110,000)
AMZN: $100k on $AMZN Puts, u/-Hyre (Losses -$103,500)
SPY: Another $100K in Spy puts., u/-Hyre (Losses -$102,600)
SPY: $95,000 loss on $SPY puts., u/-Hyre (Losses -$95,000)
SPY: Well damn here I go again., u/SilentPhanto (Losses -$78,795)
It�s been a rough year, u/Hell_to_the_Naw (Losses -$61,735)
What does a man have to do around h..., u/Camel-Kid (Losses -$59,569)
No luck in option for over a year. ..., u/AshleySilvia (Losses -$59,021)
It�S nOt A LoSS UntIL yOU seLL..., u/lifewtr (Losses -$58,588)
SPY: Whats 50k to a mf like me would you..., u/World_Chaos (Losses -$55,200)
Russian roulette confirmed, u/Camel-Kid (Losses -$54,848)
UNH: UNH YOLO aftermath, still have 78k ..., u/kid70 (Losses -$54,130)
AAPL: One more for old time's sake. (beca..., u/ControlTheNarrative (Losses -$51,000)
AMZN: 60k into AMZN puts #FuckBezos. Anyo..., u/Baikalic (Losses -$50,000)
SPY: 50k SPY Puts Yolo, u/Hell_to_the_Naw (Losses -$50,000)
AAPL: I recorded today's market-open and ..., u/ControlTheNarrative (Losses -$50,000)
SPY: Spy Puts Yolo Update: 50k loss..., u/Hell_to_the_Naw (Losses -$50,000)
GME: GME YOLO update following "nightmar..., u/DeepFuckingValue (Losses -$49,051)
TSLA: Tesla Yolo didn�t go too well, u/canthinkof123 (Losses -$47,971)
Going down with the ship boys, Noti..., u/mortal6 (Losses -$47,659)
MSFT: MSFT $49,000 10/18 135P. SUB 130 OR..., u/slamtt (Losses -$47,628)
TSLA: mod me. i just started options trad..., u/kid70 (Losses -$47,390)
3 Years ago: 35K; All time high Oct..., u/EngHH (Losses -$47,000)
TSLA: Watch the downfall of Dejula, u/Dejula (Losses -$47,000)
TEVA: In true wallstreetbets fashion. Buy..., u/PuzzleSlayerrr (Losses -$46,874)
Lost 45k. Still have 5k left. How t..., u/fishbowlreferral (Losses -$45,605)
Think I'll get fucked this Valentin..., u/aerialAria (Losses -$45,130)
Been lurking for a bit, embrace my ..., u/weedstockbagholder (Losses -$45,008)
My friends account [screenshot]..., u/Mpcars (Losses -$41,165)
TSLA: Tesla earning here I come , u/Dannyz7365 (Losses -$40,000)
CGC: My Final Yolo... 40k into CGC calls..., u/analfarmer2 (Losses -$40,000)
CGC: My Final Yolo... 40k into CGC calls..., u/analfarmer2 (Losses -$39,990)
What goes down must go up . Right ?..., u/jxzheng951 (Losses -$39,492)
I caught autism, u/ise8 (Losses -$39,000)
TLRY: One year ago today, I lost all my T..., u/SirAlek77 (Losses -$38,951)
​

Winning Tickers

SPY, TSLA, AMD, ROKU, DIS

Losing Tickers

SPY, AAPL, TSLA, CGC, AMD
​

Most Upvoted

SHOP: I�m beginning to think holding Shop..., u/jimbeam145 (Losses -$-782,000)
TSLA: Tesla Yolo didn�t go too well, u/canthinkof123 (Losses -$47,971)
ROKU: Thank you Roku!, u/TheTriviaTribe (Losses -$-49,786)
BYND: Cook & Hookers it is boys. Update o..., u/Fuyuki_Wataru (Losses -$-160,000)
AAPL: I recorded today's market-open and ..., u/ControlTheNarrative (Losses -$50,000)
CI: Autist in my Discord YOLO�d $7k int..., u/thedogman420 (Losses -$-209,571)
AMZN: $100k on $AMZN Puts, u/-Hyre (Losses -$103,500)
BIIB: $BIIB. Got lucky. My last $580...., u/marmadt (Losses -$-26,556)
What goes down must go up . Right ?..., u/jxzheng951 (Losses -$39,492)
SPY: SPY options for the win 2k to 70k..., u/dcjbella (Losses -$-68,000)
NFLX: Come suck my pp u/Dangelo_mixtape f..., u/antsy123 (Losses -$-9,660)
SPY: 600k Yolo in FDs expiring tmrw.. if..., u/analfarmer2 (Losses -$599,880)
AMZN: please God, u/MilfLover_69SQUIRT (Losses -$15,635)
MU: Thanks a lot MU you stupid slut..., u/TheRealHBR (Losses -$4,109)
TGT: Thanks Target, $90c 10/18 sold this..., u/Ubernaga (Losses -$-8,528)
DIS: $DIS - $250 to $165k - inspired by ..., u/Fog_ (Losses -$-15,100)
First year trading options. Started..., u/Th3_Candy_Man (Losses -$-20,513)
FIT: LETS GOOOOOO BABY LETS FUCKING GOOO..., u/CharlieTheHomeless (Losses -$-8,903)
AMD: $82.2mil of AMD in one year. Averag..., u/thesmd1 (Losses -$-1,020,000)
Gg seems like my ceiling was at 140..., u/SilentPhanto (Losses -$190,522)
My friend showed me his Robinhood a..., u/MiskellShoots (Losses -$26,658)
PINS: Had a fight last week but the makeu..., u/Warbring3r (Losses -$-137,812)
AMD: AMD losses. This is why you don't g..., u/LoveOfProfit (Losses -$13,000)
TSLA: My friend lost $160k on Tesla Calls..., u/fellowautists (Losses -$160,000)
Finally climbed out of the hole..., u/printingious (Losses -$-55,848)

How would I expand this? I want to write a book.
​
Junior year of University, I was approached by M(atty)M(oe) he was goading me to apply to a community service organization, the Bonner program, which rewards students accepted with a $5,000 check. Reluctantly, I applied and shockingly I was accepted into the program, which also included the aforementioned scholarship. Upon receipt of the scholarship check I stood at my mailbox for about 10 minutes $5000 seemed like a small fortune to me, a check of $5000 was almost license to drink myself into oblivion, or throw my fraternity a party completely funded by yours truly.
Nervously, I walked over to the registrars office of Stetson University and said; "Ummm I believe you’ve made a mistake, this check does not belong to me…" They tell me in return, "No that’s your award for being accepted into Bonner."
My head was spinning from the absolute good fortune of doggedly pursuing the philanthropic streak in me, and heeding MMs advice. I was trying to decide what to do with the money; "I could throw my fraternity a party…I could invest it, but any investment right now is suicide…I could buy a motorcycle…" I decided to go with motorcycle, not immediate suicide, I would at least get an dopamine rush on a daily basis. I might even attract a few girls!
Side note: the 'investment option" would have been the best option, I was presenting the equity: SNA, to the board of trustees for purchase into the school endowment portfolio, at time of check receipt, SNA (Snap-On), the equity I was presenting, was trading around $30-35/share (it touched $29/share on the day I made my presentation). At time of writing SNA was trading at $183.59/share. Upon receipt of the scholarship money that was gifted to me, for my good deeds towards humanity, I could have bought 5000/35 = 142 shares of SNA, 142*183=~$30,000. Though no (not) sane 20 year old kid would want to lock their money up for eternity and buy stocks and bonds, that is for old people… like 25 year olds.
I went down to Deland Motorsports with my best friend to browse a few insane 'crotch rockets,' Id learnt that an I-4, or inline 4 cylinder, motorcycle would be vastly overpowered for a 'squid*. Accepting this, I decided on a , very powerful Suzuki SV650s, a sane choice for a "noob."
*squirrely kid
With the final signature of some loan document (stupidly I wasnt not paying very close attention to the verbiage, or amounts - pretty incredible for a finance major) a sudden Dopamine wave went through my body. Holy shit, I thought, do I own another motor vehicle? Im going to get so many girls(!) but I am dating JL… Perhaps her friends will badger her incessantly, and she'll cave and bring another girl into the mix.
None of that happened. Though I did hook up with one if the 'hottest' girls at Stetson, MC, and she specifically said: "you look so 'hawt' riding your motorcycle back from intramural Soccer games, shirtless." Which I interpreted as a flirtatious vote lauding the purchase of that death machine, exactly the type of thing I had in mind when making the purchase. Then there was CZ, Im fairly certain she didn’t have a sexual motivation activated by the motorcycle, this was just a girl who was 'thirsty.' The summer between Junior and Senior year I was selected (incredibly) for an internship with Morgan Stanley, I remember getting the call, in April 2007:
"Hello, could we speak with Nicolas Uppal?"
ohhhh shit what did I do now? "Speaking" I said
"Congratulations Nicolas! You’ve been selected to be a Junior Financial analyst with the GWMG group at Morgan Stanley! You have two options: Beverly Hills or Downtown LA"
All my friends and family can tell you how I was constantly professing to 'adore city life,' and how 'I felt empty if I did not see anything in the sky.' However, the option laid out in front of me required some deliberation, time I did not have. "Uh uh uh Beverly Hills" I blurted out.
"Excellent choice we will send you a confirmation email with the next steps included. Welcome aboard."
Holy sh!t, I thought, im a rising Senior and I already have employment plans.
I immediately called my mother, and let her know the great news.
"I hope you & BPJ approve of this." Quickly explain the Morgan Stanley tale.
"Bien sur que il va etre excite, et mois aussi!"
"Awesome, I have class, talk to you soon, love you."
And with that I thought my future was coming together. I putted around campus for the remainder of my Junior and Senior years, occasionally riding out to Daytona beach, thinking: "this is so cool thank god for this helmet though, I didn’t have the cash to buy one there! Im glad the dealer included one with the sale." That call came at the perfect time to fully let loose over spring break.
For Spring Break; I went to Key West with GA, EM, CF, and DS - we had a blast. I don’t think there was a 5-minute space when all 5 of us were not drunk or high. Then, GA and I had the brilliant idea of renting 49cc scooters and terrorizing Duvall St. We were wrong, Duvall St. terrorized us, EM got into a fight with a bouncer at some popular bar on the strip on Duvall St. EM destroyed him, he just sat on the entrance steps as all 5 of us stumbled in, then 10 minutes and 5 drinks later, we stumbled out, mounted our scooters and safely made it back to our motel, this episode only reinforced my feeling of being invincible.
The next day GA and I were racing on the mopeds around Key West, seeing some traffic up ahead I decided to ramp on to the sidewalk and ride on the sidewalk and 'bunnyhop' down off the sidewalk, thus ensuring my victory. GA pulled up next to me laughing his ass off, from that point forward it didn’t matter if we were drunk, high, or both - we were jumping off sidewalks. Amazingly, none of us went down, except for CF who gave the scooter too much throttle on the sand, lost the rear end and the scooter fishtailed out from underneath him in some sand. Schadenfreude, I thought. Good thing im (slightly) more skilled at riding scooters.
We then had our final night out, just got really drunk didn’t do anything to prepare for the ride back up to Dea(d)land, and await the final 2 months of school.
In the final 2 months of Senior year I attended Ultra Music Festival, I was so in to progressive house and was known around campus for my love affair with House music. In fact DS and I hosted a radio show called "Techno story time," where we would 'drop' the sickest track we had heard during the previous week, and between tracks I would tell an 'R'/'X' rated story of the debauchery. Looking back on this, I must've seemed like such a douchebag, literally kissing and telling whoever had the misfortune of tuning in. Ultra (UMF) was in Miami a 7 hour drive, too pusillanimous to take 'Brutus,' (I wanted to keep him in excellent condition, keep the mileage low) I decided to take the motorcycle.
I recall that going to Miami on a motorcycle was so draining, but as always I was able to overcome that challenge and arrive in Miami with time to spare. I crashed on JLs brothers couch at UM, what an awesome guy for putting up with a smelly, dirty guy who was banging his sister. Damn, in retrospect, I cant really forgive myself for breaking up with JL a year later
At Ultra Music Fest had an awesome time, I didn’t do any drugs, get drunk, or makeout/flirt/hookup with anyone else or smoke Cannabis (although you could smell the cannabis smoke 2-3 miles away). On the drive back, I decided to go as fast as I could (actually I just really really missed JL and wanted to get to Stetson sooner) I remember having the bike at 135 MPH (engine speed limit, were it not for that or I wouldve gone much faster - so that speed limiter was a good thing) for ~30 minutes on the long and boring interior highway FL91. 91 to I-4 to US 17 to JLs arms!
The final 2 months until graduation were essentially a self-imposed retirement; I had no projects due, no finals and before leaving to Ultra Fest '09 I had just given my bond presentation. I was a free man - with no employment lined up. The drawbacks of going to a small, unknown and not-well-connected-outside-of-Florida school were beginning to become apparent
During graduation, I don’t know why I was so somber, I stuck around after graduating for a few nights to party with the boys and be with JL before I departed towards the unknown of adulthood. Upon returning to Atlanta I just assumed that I would be able to 'crash' in my old room, without having a job. Luckily, about 4 months in to my joblessness my great friend from school KD was able to hook up an interview for me with his company, AT&T. I interviewed well, but I really think KD had it already arranged to have me hired, they just wanted to vet me. I interviewed and was subsequently hired to do some business analytics/data cleaning. While working at AT&T I did great work making fun of my superior AM, however, I was not entirely clear on my task. I know I was supposed to measure the times from product purchase to online implementation. Beyond that, However the work was a sinecure until I was hired by MS. We moved buildings, 1 block to a massive, wide open cubicle farm, there may have been ~1000 cubicles in that room - and my cubicle was positioned so that the screen of my computer was visible to everyone who walked in.
Despite being assigned to a less than desirable spot. I worked, not hard but I made sure I completed all my tasks. About 2 months into my 'shafting' I decided to fly to FLL, Ft. Lauderdale, to visit JL, I missed her so badly. I didn’t just miss the sex, I missed the affection, I missed the unconditional love. I had no idea what it was that drew me so close to JL, but I kept going to her. While I was visiting JL she suggested that we go to a dog racing track, having only been to one before, I went to a dog racing track in Daytona Beach with AGs dad and my BFF NB, I agreed the event was not too memorable. However, on the drive back from the track I received a call from the connection I made during my internship with MS, the Managing Director of HR, CNG.
CNG informed me of a position in Coral Gables, Miami FL working with one of her friends JFG. Since I was already in Naples, 90 miles from Miami, I replied with: "I can be there to interview in two days…" With that I experienced another endorphin rush, I ffelt like my future was being laid out in front of me, I just had to secure this job, work my ass off, endure a few years of menial pay until I am promoted to 'Associate' and pay for JL to move in with me. This was especially alluring to me because it seemed like my best friends were getting amazing jobs; RL (my best friend) was working at a PE shop in ATL, and my good friend MS was consulting with McKinsey in Dubai, then again they went to awesome schools Emory and Wharton, respectively.
After my interview with JFG I drove back to Naples for a night before flying back to Atlanta,. It finally felt like I was entering adulthood. I got the position in Miami, I then attempted to put in my two weeks at AT&T when I tried to put in my two weeks my supervisor, AM, said: "No need, you don’t need to come back tomorrow." So with that I was a free man for 2 months, it felt eerily similar to finishing Stetson. I set about organising my departure and move to Miami.
I quickly realised that I was too poor to remotely make a down payment on a condo sight-unseen, so I meekly implored JL to ask her brother, RL, to allow me to crash on his couch for '1 week at most.' I felt like such a bum, living in the UM dorms, working for MS but not having a place to call my own. I had to make a change, so I went around my office asking if anyone needed or knew of anyone who needed a roommate. Luckily, a friend of my then boss, JFG, also had an analyst on his team, RM. We met and quickly agreed to cohabitate an apartment.
Living with RM was fairly easy, he was a very agreeable roommate, I think I pulled the best hand out of the deal,I made sure I got the master suite of the apartment while paying 10% less than RM, I feel like an asshole thinking back on it - but capitalism makes you do things against your human nature. We got into an ok apartment if it were not for the recession of 08-09 we would have never been able to afford it.
About 2 months after I finalized living with RM, Ultra '11 was gearing up, knowing that I was not earning enough to afford a $230 ticket, I begged JL to buy the ticket for our 2 year anniversary. She did! I thought; oh man I love this girl so much, I cant wait to spend the rest o my life with her. My friends GA and DS also were at UMF '11, we had a blast. None of us got too high, drunk or messed up, and strangely I never got GA or EM back to my apartment even though it was 2 blocks from Bayfront park.
I recouped for 12 hours, slept off the alcohol and cannabis, and showed up for work that Monday, probably looking like shit. A few months later, I decided to look up my Boss during my internship, GD. When we connected he was so glad to hear from me, he was unsure if I had been hired. Two calls later he gave me two things: a task to test a Mercedes E55 AMG(we were both gearheads), a job offer in Beverly Hills. Having just the task to test drive the car wouldve been enough, but a job offer in LA? My mind began racing, I had a flexible start date so I was able to gradually close things out and speak with my portfolio manager. Although a favor was called in to get me hired, JFG had no qualms about letting me go.
A month later I went out for my birthday with KG, we werent dating but she had an enormous crush on me, infact she came to Stetson to visut me, much to the chagrin of Jenny. We went to a few small bars, and ended up at club LIV, it was there I met the most beautiful girl I ever laid eyes on, Viviane G. from Rio, much to my amazement she was in to me as well (probably because at the time I had a head of black hair, this made me look like a Brazilian model). Vivi (as I called her) and I hit it off we spent the rest of my time in Miami together, we never kissed, this is why I felt ok staying with Jenny.
Then, a car and yacht show, 1 block from my apartment spurred the motivation to call and break up with Jenny, strangely. I thought Vivi was the woman of my dreams, I didn’t take in to consideration everything Jenny, and her family, had done for me
I took 2 months to finish up in Miami, going out every night to get the last feel of Miami nightlife before I ventured out to the great unknown west. Once again, like in Miami, I arrived in LA and had to 'crash' on my moms good friend LDs guest bedroom, until I got my situation squared away. I was able to quickly secure an apartment 2 blocks from Hollywood Ave., with a view of the Hollywood sign. "Oh man," I thought "I must be the flossiest Stetson graduate right now." I soon came to learn that DS was in LA too, we linked up and I found my smoking/drinking partner while I was in LA.
Work in the Beverly Hills branch of Morgan Stanley was not overly intense, I was just working with a few extra figures. This increase in amount magnified any mistake I made, and I made quite a few mistakes, luckily these were only mistakes on internal reporting documents my managers (one in Beverly Hills and the other in Boston) were pretty cool with it, but still pointed these mistakes out. I remember the team assistant, AT, being so gorgeous, she was taken, or I wouldve been all over that, I wanted to marry her. There were three women that I wanted to marry: 1 - Vivi, 2 - Jenny, 3 - AT
About 2 months in to living in Los Angeles AT, told me about the website Thrillist. I thought "wow Thrillist is so cool, all these awesome events…wait whats thus 'Rental Car Rally?'" The more I read about it, the more I became supremely interested and thought, oh man my friend GA would be PERFECT as my co pilot. I kept thinking about all the hijinks we would get in to, and the speeding, and the (name your debaucherous activity here). GA flew out to LA, we secured a rental Camaro SS coupe and headed for the rally.
We get to the staging area and we see a flood of other cars, buses, and people dressed in ridiculous outfits "this is going to be too much fun!" we said to each other. As the staging process moves on we see some incredible car decorations, and at the end of the pre-rally warm up we are given the option to race on a circle track, being the speed demons that GA & I were, we A B S O L U T E L Y took full advantage of that option. There was no passing allowed, and a quarter track length between each racer. We stage in line - our turn comes up and I bury the throttle, the rear tires barely having grip as we rocket onto the track, I didn’t dare to go above 125 MPH sine I was unsure about the condition of the tires. As we finished what was essentially a penis-size competition, I decided to do an enormous burnout in the middle of the track. After that burnout we were off to the races.
The rally was set up as a series of checkpoints, you have to take a photo at each checkpoint for proof you were there. First checkpoint: LA Zoo. Going to a zoo during the day is interesting, and smelly. At night however, its frightening different sounds and screams from other ralliers in the distance, we took a photo and drove, withi the speed limits, o course, to the next check point. This checkpoint was an abandoned ski lodge, perfect for messing around on abandoned ski lifts. After the ski lodge, we vebtured out into the desert, we only had 1 checkpoint between the LA Zoo and Vegas, and that checkpoint was on the very western edge of Nevada, a brothel - GA said he had no interest in buyin their "product," I remarked to GA how sad I as that I didnt "dip my pen in Dutch ink" while I was in Amsterdam with KD, yet I too was leery of getting some western Nevada 'strange.' We terorized a few trailer parks, doing insane burnouts and leaving the trailer parkhood in dust.
GA and I get to the strip, our rental Camaro SS was filthy, but we gave no fuc*s. We pull up the crappy little off-strip motel, a motel that was likely used by the hookers around Las Vegas, toss our bags on the floor and crashed for about 4 hours. Our room was right be the Lima Bean shaped pool so we could hear the fellow ralliers horsing around by the pool. Greg gets up, looks out the window, tosses me a Natural Light and says; "the only way to detox is to retox muthaf*****!"
To which I replied :"that’s excellent, but first pack a bowl beforeI shower to get this wester Nevada hooker scent off me…"
We both get out to the pool and EVERYONE rom the starting line is there, they were all really really drunk. Since I was a little tired, and wanted to be on my game for gambling that night, I didn’t drink or smoke. The night rolled around and we rustled up some grub on the strip, then we went to MGM to gamble: "Im not putting more than $50 down for chips…"
"Cool, imma do $100, you broke bitch" GA said.
We decide to play some slots (yawn), some Roulette (yawn), then I said I wanted to play some BlackJack. We walked up to the black jack table, waited for the dealer to reshuffle, and jumped in. I felt really smart so I thought I could count cards, after a few hands I started to turn a $5 to $10 to $20 profit, leaving me with $50, the exact same as I started with I thought: "ok, I can quit now, or go for glory, and put 80% down…" Me being the dumb kid I was, I decided to put $40 down and risk it all.
"ohhhh the little piker thinks hes got game!?" The dealer said
"Ehhhh" I replied
The cards come out and I get a 9 and a King.
"I bet you want a hit…"
"Nah, the only hit im taking will be the hit of Cannabis I take after I win this hand"
"Ok kid"
The dealer got a 5, Queen. "I bet you want a hit…" I said in a snarky tone
He took a card, a 7.
I said: "Id like to close out, please"
"Awwww poor kid cant play!?"
"Id like to close out, please"
"Ok tough guy"
I take my chips, get them cashed, and wound up with $95. I turned to GA: "I see how this can get addictive, I turned a 90% ROI!"
"We both laughed, piled into the Camaro, and GA drove us back to LA. GA hung out with DS for an extra day in LA while I was at work - about a month went by before my portfolio manager GD told me I needed to get to Boston to meet the other half of the team, I had only spoken to AS & SG on the phone, trying to explain how to use my messed up spreadsheets. Upon the meeting I figured: "Im already in the North East, I will swing down to NYC to visit RL, RN & MS.
The first night we were itogether, we just went out, got drunk, went to MS' friends apartment, but she wasn’t home yet. So MS and I decided to sleep, on the loor, in front of her door in a fairly swanky Upper East Side apartment. Early that morning MS and I were both awoken by a securoty guard kicking our feet: "uhhhh whats goin on here?"
"oh, sorry we got locked out by our friend she didn’t come home last night, do you all have a lounge?"
"yep, to the right of the front desk"
"Awesome, thank you"
MS and I slept on couches (what a luxury until JP came home. We got cleaned up and I grabbed my bag and went to MS, RN, and RLs apartment. Except it was a 2-bedroom. RL has converted a narrow, but very tall closet into a bedroom/loft. RL and I had been friends since high school, so I felt ok asking him if I could toss my stuff in his room. It was Saturday night, so we all got cleaned up, grabbed a pizza ate in, and got hyped for Saturday night.
"Where should we go?" asked RN.
Me:"I really wanna go to Pacha near westside highway! I get a podcast every week by them, and they have awesome music!"
RN asks:"Ok, everybody cool with Pacha?"
MS:"I wanna hit a college bar, maybe we go there to pregame, then Pacha?"
Me: "yeah that sounds splendifferous"
We set out, at the college bar, I ended up taking 3 shots and I was done for, I cant remember a thing. I stumble up to the bar and ask or a Heineken. "Ohhh is that for me?" An unseen girl asked
"Sure, if we go home tonight."
"OK"
Not being able to believe my ears, I turned around and I see this really cuteAsian girl with her hand out.
"hmm youre pretty thirsty huh?"
"Like you wouldn’t believe" as she snatched the beer out of my hand
"Well maybe you can give me some private tutoring, so I do believe."
"Im a great teacher"
"Well, I kinda suck at school, anything you can do?"
"Well as far as sucking, I think we can work something out"
"well, Ill be sure to get you an extra juicy Apple"
"Sounds delicious"
We danced, occasionally kissing, and made our way back to RL, RN & MS' apartment. When we got there I realized I had no bed to sleep on, only a couch, but RL being the good friend he is said: "Y'all can sleep (wink) in my bed."
"The dungeon!? Yesssss. Thanks man."
So, this girl (didn’t and still don’t know her name) amble up the ladder, she was wearing a skirt and wanted to go first. "Ok I know where this is going…to the bed!"
"Aww cant we play teachestudent first?"
"Only if I get a taste of that Apple I brought you..."
The next morning was my flight out to LA at 4:56 PM, so I had time to grab brunch with the guys before I left. We ate on Chelsea Pier, I felt obliged to 'kiss and tell,' and extol them with my heroics. In retrospect, they probably didn’t want to hear it, I banged some random, probabky nasty girl on RLs bed. We finished lunch had some fun on Chelsea pier, and I flew back to LA. While back in Beverly Hills I was incredibly tire, but I took pride in recounting every detail to DV, knowing AT could hear. I stupidly thought: "if she hears how much fun im having, she might get jealous and want to hangout with me." I was such a devious little shit.
I finish telling DV just as GD walks in to hear the punchline; "…so I brought her back and got her on my friends bed!" GD walks to his station, with four screens (I used to think the ore screens you have the more of a boss you are, now I think the less you have to involve yourself with day-to-day, and intraday moves the more of a 'boss' you are) I can feel him staring at me smiling my ass of, he says "I WANT TO FU*KING HEAR!" So I launch into my tale (or should I say tail).
Later that week I called my father while biking to the gym. I called him because I made an error In the execution of a large fixed income trade, the price of the underlying security moved away from the price quoted, normally this would not matter since we had discretion over trading - meaning we would not need client approval. However, this was a trade for our largest client making a large fixed income purchase, so $.01 makes a big difference when the quantity purchased is in the millions. My father recounts this story to me as an almost emblematic admission of previous of apprehension towards him, and my subsequent of rectification.
As theNYC buzz began to wear off, I started going to bars around LA; SkyBar, and Viper Room one night my two buddies DS & DS, and I all agreed that we should go to Club Avalon, I was a huge electronic progressive house music aficionado so going to world famous club Avalon was *almost* as sweet as NYC with my bros. DS and I cohosted 'Techno Storytime' on the school radio, so we were super pumped to hear some much in the 110 - 130 BPM range.
Still feeling the nightlife buzz from NYC, I found myself able to easily to talk to girls. Doug and I were kinda wall flowers/club explorers, neither one of us has been to Avalon, but upon exploring it we both agreed, DS would love it too, we should start meeting there monthly. The night wore on, I found myself uninterested in paying $12.00 for a bottle if Heineken, so I started to hit on some women, DS and I had explored too much and I only had 30 minutes to seal the deal. So I got to work, quickly scored the number, but we got sidetracked talking about a subject I really, really enjoy; political analysis.
We talked political analysis I wish I could remember what she was saying, she was so on the ball, that awareness only increased my attraction to her. We talked for a bit, we went to the outside portion of the club, seeing her in the moonlight I thought; "shit, she is magnificent, screw AT if I land her. Her looks combined with her intellect make her a superwoman, exactly the type of woman I want carrying my seed. By this point 20 minutes had elapsed, and the club began emptying, "oh shit better seal th-"
"It was amazing talking to you, but I have to find my friends."
"Wait, maybe we…"
She was gone from my life, at least I had her number…
I moped back to DS, he asked me: "Howd it go man!?"
I started yelling that 'I couldn’t seal the f$%^ing deal!"
"Its cool man, this is a big city, im sure youll have other shots, lets catch a cab back to my crib, smoke a bowl watch a movie and forget about all this."
"Aight dude that sounds awesome."
So, we go out to the taxi area, DS and I just bullshitting, and he stop talking: "…so DS has this sick fader on his turn tab…. Wait, what was the name of the girl you were talking to?"
"Why? K(atie)A(ltman…)
"KATIE!!!!!!"
"D what the…."
"KATIE!!!!!!"
"Oh Shit that’s Katie!"
He yells -"KATIE!!!!!!"
She turns around as she is getting in to her cab, with her buddies. I sprint over to her cab wrench the cab door open, and ride with the back to their apartment in Laurel Canyon. From here, I don’t have a clear memory of what happened but I woke up in my bed the next morning. "Shit" I thought, did I walk back to Franklin from Laurel Canyon? Guess I don’t need to work out today! So I rolled back over and dozed for another 45minutes until I get a text from the girl who was sweating me at the gym, CS.
A little back story on CR; I was always checking her out, so was always pushing her massive chest out when I would walk by and she was on a machine. Then one day she walked up behind me while I was doing pushups, waited for me to finish me set… "ninety eight…ninety nine…one hundered, I don’t know I you were listening there I did 100 pushups, ha ha ha
"Is that rom a movie???"
"Anchorman!"
"Ohhhh, well lets see how you do with me riding yourback!"
"Wait what?"
CR straddled my back and plopped down. I pretended to not be able do any with her on my back. "Come on muscle man, make me ride you!"
"Um, im not sure I feel comfortable announcing to the gym that you want to fuck me"
"Who said that, that wishful thinking man…"
"How about we compare our wishes, what is a good night next week to take you to dinner?"
"Sunday night"
"Sunday!?!?"
"I am a nurse so I work weird hours, but next Sunday night, lets get take out, a bottle of wine and some…youre from India right?"
"Half"
"Ok, some Hindu Kush, sit on the beach in Santa Monica and share dinner."
"Whoa, yes ma'am!"
"Ma'am?"
"Southern thing, I tell you about on Sunday night."
"Can't wait" She said with a smile
I left the LA Fitness on Hollywood BLVD. next to the Chinese Theater in a dream state. Then I realized that Sunday night was 2 nights away! Shit I need to get wine and a ton of Hindu Kush! I secured the Hindu Kush (too much), but not the wine, I wanted to get Red, and White to give her the option. Since I has just moved into my new apartment, I didn’t have time to set everything up, so I didn’t have time to buy a cooler to chill the white wine; "I will have to buy it the night of."
I searched my room and couldn’t find any more bud, so I decided to Meet DS and DS for dinner, we wound up going to a bar too - oops! Needless to say I didn’t get to pick up the wine, or the Kush, id have to pick it up before the date, tomorrow. "Hey do you guys know I any dispensaries are open on Sunday??
"They arent, but our friend owns one, he'll sell to you."
"Awesome"
So, I contact DS and DS' buddy; I meet him and buy absolutely too much bud, and buy some gummies too, I swing back by my apartment on Franklin, drop off the dry bud" CR and I wont need that much, and get a call from DS, Ds and crew: "Yooo nuppal, were gonna go catch a movie, you down?"
"Yeah man lets do it!"
I quickly grab my backpack, remembering that I needed to pick up the wine, and knowing I needed to bring some bud. I hopped on my bike and roade over to East Hollywood to catch a flick with them. I pull up, get off the bike as theyre rolling up, I swing my backpack across, thinking im going to light up. I open the back pack… "Hey guys lets do this before…" Open the back pack a but more and reach in feeling for my bowl and the tupperware with the dry kush, and realizing that I hadnt unpacked the edibles that id bought. So, I skipped the dry bud and said: "hey guys I just bought these edibles, lets each grab some gummies and watch the movie…"
"Alright dude, but Edibles will hit when the movie is ending, but yeah man!"
So we take some gummies, and watch the movie. DS was right, the gummies did begin to take effect as the movie ended: "shit" I thought "Im gonna have to ride to Santa Monica while pretty high…no big deal, I hate riding high though." As Im riding down Sunset BLVD, heading west towards Santa Monica I happen to look up at the sky during a red light. The magnificence of a South-Western Southern California sunset is something everyone must enjoy, similar to the colors a Monet painting. I stared up at the sky for longer than the light was red, so people behind me became agitated. I quickly moved down Sunset blvd. at the famous (or infamous) intersection of Sunset Blvd. & Larrabee St. in West Hollywood.
Still mesmerized by the sunset, yet trying to focus, I see a clapped out For Expedition come from Larrabee, turning left onto Sunset the intended turn was in my path. I took a second to process "this is my path what the fuohhhh," going from euphoric joy to life saving maneuvers is not something they teach in MSF school, good thing I never went. After processing his intended trajectory I slammed on the brakes,
A part-time bartender at the Viper Room "didn’t see his red light due to sun" and was under assume every light is 'Green' for him. So he decided that even though there is traffic on Sunset, he would rather turn o make sure there was no traffic going in his intended direction on Sunset. I knew that grabbing too much front brake would send me headfirst into the pavement and his car, and into my coffin. So, I decided to overapply the rear brake, lay the bike down and hope for the best, I guess 'the best' of an inherently shitty situation did occur, I lived! However, while sliding through the Sunset & Larrabee intersection my back connected with the end of his passenger-side running board, my brand new Scorpion Exo-1000 hit the running board as well. Instantly knocked out. According to the report filed by the ambulance driver I was 'unresponsive' at the scene, but no external blood, save a bit of road rash were my jacket bunched up underneath my left arm, I suffered a 'severe' DAI brain injury (Diffuse Axonal Injury) and 26 brain bleeds.
Luckily, the ambulance ride was at most 8 minutes to Cedars-Siani Beverly Hills, this hospital was on my commute path to and from work, on Maple Dr. I always wondered what the building was, so much property in the heart of Beverly Hills however, this was NOT the method I intended to find out about this building. Must have been a funny scene in the office the next Monday. "Looks like Nick is late again" said AT
My dad gave me my first laugh post injury, we agree that laughter is the vanguard of healing mental and physical ailments.