This is going to be a long post. My life story almost. It all started in 2010 when I was introduced to poker. Yada yada yada, I got hooked.
Naturally a tight passive player, I was able to stretch each $20 deposit a long way.
I slowly started adding aggression. Betting with flush draws, etc.
Ran it up to around 3k.
Booked a flight to LA to go visit my cousin but it was really just an excuse to go to commerce casino (my first live experience).
Didn't know about their $40 buy in structure. Lost 3k in 1 week.
quit playing for a while.
black friday happens.
Dream is offically dead.
Oh wait, what are these off shore sites. Bodog? sportsbookpoker? intertops? cake? wtf. lets check them out.
Ran good on intertops. Turned $20 into 4.3k in 1 week by running like Usain.
Played against a guy named ivysaurus for my entire roll at 25/50 headsup.
Lost.
Called it quits again.
got a job at a restaurant.
worked there for 2 years.
saved up 10k.
moved to vegas in 2016.
played live 1/2.
played too loose.
Lost about 2k the first month.
Switched over to playing 1/3 at bellagio.
better results started happening.
wpt diamond is starting.
Cameras all over the place in bellagio.
poker tables all full.
The sportsbook is filled with tables now.
My roll is at 16k.
I try to get into a 1/3 game. Waitlist too deep.
2/5, same story.
Theres an open seat at a 5/10 game.
eh why not, im running good lately.
I sit down. Called down 2 streets 2nd pair.
My heart is racing. Villain checks river. I check back. I win.
$300 profit in 1 hand.
New villain sits down at table.
Hes a tv guy that plays 25/50 on poker night in america. I forget his name. Arabic or armenian lookin dude with curly hair.
He wild.
Hes splashing cuz hes just trying to pass the time until he gets into the bigger games.
I win 2k off him in like 30 minutes. He gives me the death look and mutters some curse words. Floor comes over, tells this man his seat is open. He gets up. Floorman picks up his chips for him cuz he a bitch.
Game seems to be too tough now. Actually its the same game, but Im sitting on a 4k stack. I get nervous and cash out.
my bankroll at like 19k now. Highest point of my life.
Fell in love with a hooker. Down 3k.
bankroll 16k.
Refocus.
Go to aria to play some 1/3.
Crush it.
Lots of noise at a plo table in the corner near the bathroom.
I get on the waitlist for that game.
Im addicted to plo now.
Ran good at first. Won like 5k my first week playing 1/3/5 plo.
Then my ev started leveling out. I was never a winner at plo.
Lost the 5k right back and then some.
dont worry, losing 5-7k in a week isnt that bad.
or is it?
damnit it was.
This was the moment I should have gone back to 1/3 nl.
but nope. Plo more fun.
kept playing. learning on the fly. didnt do that bad looking back on it, but it was still bad.
my bankroll was down to 14k at one point and I remember feeling so defeated.
I might as well have had $100 to my name, cuz thats what it felt like. I do not know why. Mental issues.
It was all down hill from here.
the chase begins...
fill in the blanks
you know how this story ends.

Hey everyone,
I wanted to put out a few thoughts regarding mentality in League, especially compared to other competitive activities and skill-based endeavors. This is as much to simply clarify my own thoughts as it is to create a dialogue and, if I may be so bold, inform.
Also, I love writing long posts. If you clicked in, be warned. This is a goddamn novel.
However, here's the tl;dr
TL;DR - Basically I want to know what you guys think we as a community can do to improve toxicity and mentality in League, and maybe make it a bit more inviting and fun. Scroll down to the bottom on my suggestions/discussion section for my main talking points.
First, let me flex a bit to show what I'm bringing to the discussion (because it really isn't League knowledge, unfortunately):
I'm a dilettante at heart. I love learning new subjects, and I've always had a particular bent for competition.
Chess was a first competitive game, and I peaked around 1700 Elo. Not the highest, but not a bad player. Go (also known as baduk, igo, and weiqi) was a major love, and I currently sit at 1 kyu. I've also played some Overwatch (peaked at Plat) and a handful of other smaller games with less competitive communities.
For those unfamiliar with the ranks, to use a very rough comparison to the League system it would probably be something like:

• High Gold/Low Plat in Chess
• Mid Diamond in Go (maybe?)
• Plat in Overwatch is honestly like, mid Gold in League

I also play three instruments competently (guitar especially well) and went to school for classical guitar and music composition. For those who have not worked in music or sought a career, it's quite competitive.
Oh, and Smash. I've played a healthy amount of Melee and PM. I'm not the best, but I'm better than most, played a fair amount online and followed the esports pretty closely. A few other fighting games too, but those never interested me nearly as much.
The reason that I bring these up is just to give a baseline of my knowledge about competitive mentality in general. You don't get good at these things by talent or just "not being an idiot," you have to play and practice and work and study. Talent doesn't get you very far at all.
Next, a disclaimer:
I'm a relatively new League player. I started playing League because my crush (later girlfriend, now wife) had just gotten into it. This was like...late S7? I played a couple dozen games, fed my ass off and then dropped it not long after. I didn't pick it back up until quarantine, where I started in Iron III and have made it up to Silver III (where I failed my promos for Silver II last night...).
So NOT a world-class League player. Statistically on the lower side of average, actually. But I'm working on it and I'm having fun.
I wanted to talk about a few subjects as they relate to League of Legends through the lens of my experience in learning other stuff. These are discussion points, not instructional. I don't want to tell anyone how they should play a game, but I did want to let everyone know how it looks from the viewpoint of a newcomer looking to compete in something cool.

1. League's Aspects
2. Toxicity
3. Newcomers
4. Comments/Suggestions for Discussion

​
LEAGUE'S ASPECTS
So the first thing is that I really like League as a skill-based game. MOBAs are very unique in their spot, but I think they deserve a seat at the table with discussions about games like chess, go, poker, etc.
One funny thing is that it is a skill-based game without the element of chance (per se) when it comes to gameplay, which makes one put it in the same realm as chess and the like. There's no RNG, just the choices of others, and so skill expression is very apparent.
However, there is a key distinction between games like chess and League, namely access to information. In chess or go, you see the whole board. You have the same information that your opponent does. In League, you have a situation where you have the limited information from your own team's vision via minions, towers, wards, and your own champion's line of sight. If there were no fog of war, League would be very much a simpler game and would be abysmally boring. This aspect gives it a similar feel to the competitive aspects of poker, where you have access to limited information and the skill lies in playing the numbers and using this to read your opponents and gain small advantages.
Next, there is another aspect which differentiates League from games like chess as well as games like poker and (an arguably much more direct relative) RTS games. That is the fact that League is played with a team. This makes it similar in a sense to a game like Overwatch in that one of the main factors that is out of your control is what your teammates do with their champs. You do your best on your champ, and communication with your team becomes a massive competitive advantage.
So the way I see it, there are a few distinct aspects of League when you want to break it down as a competitive game:

• League is a skill-based game, where your game knowledge, decision making, and technical execution are rewarded. There is very little RNG. Lack of knowledge, poor decisions, or poor execution of decisions are punished.
• League is an information-based game, where you do not have full information of the field of play and so information gathering and processing are rewarded. Lack of information gathering and failure to interpret what information you do have correctly are punished.
• League is a team-based game where you have to work together with other players to accomplish your goals. Good communication and coordination are rewarded. Poor communication and coordination are punished. This is also the aspect which is most outside of your control.

TOXICITY
This is, unfortunately, the thing for which the League community is most infamous. Let's break down some situations I know y'all have seen in SoloQ:

• You have a bad game. Everyone has them in SoloQ, from Iron to Challenger. Just check out op.gg or look at TSM's Worlds 2020 performance (jk, but not really. sorry, all NA fans...). Someone on your team starts "flaming" you for playing like shit. Which, let's face it, you are probably playing like shit compared to your average games.
• Someone on your team is having a bad game and blames a teammate (usually the jungler) for their awful performance.
• Your team starts losing and a teammate decides to "run it down."
• Teammates that spam ff on a game that is still pretty winnable
• Teammates that refuse to ff in order to lock you into an unwinnable game while they continue to run it down.
• ADC blaming support or vice versa, when they just took bad fights or mispositioned.

This is normal, right?
But it's all kind of weird mentalities, especially because when they are doing well these same people never seem to think that they did it with their team's help or because of bad enemy play.
You go 10/0/0 in lane and got a double whenever you got ganked? It was because you popped off! It wasn't because they tried fighting in your wave or didn't track summs or just mechanically misplayed. It's because you're awesome, right?
Jungler camps your lane and gets you fed (in a dream world, right?) it's because you set up your lanes correctly, right? You might give some credit to your jg, but not as much blame as junglers usually get when the laner is just running it down.
Enemy team ffs a winnable game you type "?" in all chat.
Enemy team refuses to ff a game when you're 30k gold ahead on scaling champs, you feel confused and maybe laugh a bit.
I won't say that players never acknowledge mistakes of the enemy team as mistakes, but I think that the degree to which your teammates are upset by your mistakes is absolutely disproportionate to how well you are acknowledged for sound play, and the credit players give themselves is disproportionate to how much credit they give their team.
***
Some Comparisons:
Overwatch: I think League's toxicity stems, to a degree, from its team-based aspect. Overwatch is the only thing I've encountered where the community was anything but lovely, helpful, and informative. I think it's because in 2-player games, the only person you can blame is yourself. The other person beat you, therefore they were better than you that game, and so you have something to learn. Overwatch...that's not always the case.
However, I think Overwatch players do better than League players. There are calls people will make to do better, but it's very rare that someone gives up or spends a lot of time being upset when their teammate sucks, and they may adjust their play accordingly if someone on their team is not doing well.
Go/Chess: This aspect of toxicity was actually the reason I never got into League before quarantine. When you compare League's community to a game like go, League is (quite bluntly) fucking disgusting.
Do you know what go players do at mid-high ranks after a game? They sit down and review it together. Even in tournament settings, if you have time before your next match it is absolutely the polite thing to do. To refuse to review a game (barring perhaps if you have somewhere to be) can even considered a bit rude.
You know what would NEVER happen in a go match? Being rude to your opponent, whether they won or they lost. Like, I can't even fathom playing a game online with someone, dumpstering them and seeing them type "fuck you, kys trash" in game. Or getting dumpstered and someone typing "gg ez."
Now go players are a bit different. Go is a very thinking-based game and based on concepts of balance, trading, and sharing. So the game doesn't appeal to someone who can't sit at a board for a couple of hours quietly and compete, nor to people who feel the need to dominate someone.
But chess is about domination to a larger degree, and the games (can be) much faster than go, or at least of a similar length as your average game of League. And I could count EASILY on one hand the number of times anyone has been rude to me before, during, or after a chess match.
***
Rank-Shaming:
You know how deeply this is ingrained into players? Whenever anyone has told me they play League, they almost always put as a precursor that they are a "(insert-rank) scrub." Whether bronze or silver or diamond, they automatically feel bad because they know they can improve on the game.
Most everyone knows that statistically speaking over half of players are Gold or below. According to League of Graphs, Plat+ is just under 15% of players, while Diamond+ is just under 3% of players.
Do you know how objectively ridiculous it is to make fun of someone for being "hardstuck Diamond II"? To make fun of someone for being in the top .5% of all League players? That's insane.
This isn't a call-out post specifically and I legitimately am interested in opening up discussion, but this part is a bit of a call-out. This activity is stupid. It would literally be the equivalent of someone making fun of an IM (International Master) in chess for not being a Chess Grandmaster. IM is a lifetime achievement in and of itself.
The ONLY thing I've ever seen an equivalent of is some light jabbing from VERY high rated players when ACTIVELY TRYING TO HELP a player who is trying to break into high Elo (i.e. help a chess player break into 2000+ Elo and hit Candidate Master; or help a go player break into 1 dan).
If someone is being a toxic asshole, call them out for being a toxic asshole, not for their rank. I mean, damn.
Also, this flies in the face of any understanding of how systems like this work. Honestly if everyone (and I mean EVERYONE) in the world was as good as a Diamond player is currently, then you know what would happen? If there were any change at all, sure there would be fewer iron players BUT THERE WOULD ALSO BE WAY FEWER DIAMOND PLAYERS. The bell-curve would flatten out and most people would still fall somewhere in the middle. (Correct me if I'm wrong on my statistics knowledge here, reddit...)
Either way, rank is an indication of skill and a personal achievement. Shaming someone for not having made that goal yet is really shitty, I think.
***
Flaming Your Own Damn Team:
My brother (and frequent duo-queue partner) said it best when we muted some toxic teammates: "For a game so fundamentally based on communication, League is remarkably improved by turning off chat."
As mentioned earlier, teams are a core part of League and one of the things you can least control. So why is it that in the few things we can do to control our teammates (namely chat and pings), we insist on making it a toxic shit-hole of an experience? It's super easy to vent your frustrations, but it actively harms your team.
I don't think a single player has ever legitimately improved by getting flamed. Ever. They either get defensive and just do the same damn thing, they troll, or they mute you. But, in almost every case, they tilt. They play WORSE because of what you're doing. And they don't actually learn anything.
***
Winning/Losing:
In go, there is a saying: "a newcomer should lose their first hundred games as soon as possible." When the newcomer does this, the response is frequently "Nicely done! Get on with losing the next hundred."
This doesn't mean you int 100 games of go in a row. It means that you learn more by losing than by winning.
A question for all of you: how many games that you lost do you actually remember? Maybe a few spectacular losses, or some really close games that you couldn't pull through. But seriously, compared to how many games you've lost, how many actually stuck with you as memories? I'd bet not many.
For that matter, how many games that you won have stuck with you? Again, maybe some spectacular hijinx you pulled off and saved in a highlight reel, sure.
But at the end of the day, the W and the L are equally unremarkable when you're not playing professionally.
I've probably played and lost hundreds of games of chess and thousands of games of go. Do I remember any of them? I don't remember a single chess match I lost with any clarity, and I can remember exactly one go loss that I had because it was at a tournament I traveled for and the loss was due to a silly blunder.
League isn't different. So why do League players treat a loss like it's the end of the goddamn world?
Sure, there's a time investment involved and nobody likes to play to lose. But, if I'm being real...don't play competitive games if you're a sore-ass loser?
Like I said, go players often review the game with their opponent, win or lose. Usually the winner is the one who offers the review, but it doesn't matter. The point is that when the game is done, both players are willing to look each other in the eye and help each other get better at the game.
I personally feel like dignity in losing is important, and the lack of it is something I think will absolutely hurt your climb if you don't have it. Getting the fuck over yourself is something that frequently pushes someone past a middle rank in chess/go/etc. up to a serious ranking.
The idea should be to go into every game and try to win, but accept that you'll lose sometimes. If you're losing less than half of the time, you're climbing. If you're losing about half, then you have mistakes to learn from. If you're losing significantly more than half your games, you're either boosted or you're tilted, and you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
Additionally, you should realize that people who you are playing with are at your rank. "Elo Hell" is a concept that stemmed from League players and stems from the team-based nature of it all. Your teammates are "so bad" that you have to "hard carry" your games to get through, and even then you can't make it.
But that's bullshit, right? Sure there will be games where your teammates int and there's no way you can win but, over a long enough time period, there should be just as many games where your opponents int and you get a free win.
Actually, it's better than that. So long as you don't literally give up or troll, you have 4 players that could give up/troll on your team and 5 players that could give up/troll on the enemy team. Statistically, if you're better than your peers, you should climb.
There are certain strategies that work better in SoloQ (as opposed to coordinated FlexQ/Pro Play) and these are MORE than covered by a ton of YouTube content, as well as strategies that work better at low elo than high elo and vice versa. But barring that, your skill has a lot to do with your rank, so unless you are actively getting better at a rate faster than the people at your elo, you'll probably stay the same rank and maybe climb very slowly.
***
Surrender Votes:
This one I add because I mentioned it and thought there were two interesting schools of thought and wanted to see what others thought about it:
Chess:
In chess, there is not really incentive to forfeit since you may be able to force a draw. You are certainly allowed to resign if you're sure that the opponent has a way to beat you, knows what it is and is actively planning on properly executing that strategy, but there's nothing wrong with someone making you "play it out."
My dad always liked to say to me regarding chess that you should make your opponent "prove it." They should prove they know how to pull out the win. Quitters never win, right?
Go:
Go players do not share this philosophy. Since Go is a point-based game where you typically win by accumulating small advantages and the rules (as of the twentieth century) do not allow a draw to occur, the game can be won by a small margin or a large margin.
There occasionally comes a point where your opponent has accumulated an overwhelming advantage over you and you do not actually have room for counterplay. The lead is too great, and you will lose this game.
It is actually considered rude in the go community to NOT surrender, as all you are doing is wasting the time of your opponent.
While there is still no incentive for resignation from the standpoint of "you won't win either way," there is no incentive to continue either. You will lose. The reward for the forfeit is valuing your time and that of your opponents over pride.
League:
League appears to have players in both camps, each feeling the other is rude or inconsiderate.
Some people think that people who want to ff have "weak mental." Maybe it's true sometimes, but maybe they are looking at a situation where the enemy team is ahead, scales better, and appears to be well-coordinated. They don't want to spend the extra ten minutes "playing it out" when there seems to be no incentive for doing so. If they just chalk up the LP as lost and get to the next game, that ten minutes would already have them well into their next laning phase.
That being said, throws happen CONSTANTLY in League. Especially since the later a game goes on, the longer death timers are. So if the enemy team is ahead and doesn't end, and you catch someone out, you can force a fight 4v5 and maybe even just end if the game has gone on long enough, even if you are behind.
So "hostage takers" are sometimes just counting on the enemy team throwing, as they often may do.
Additionally, I think while League definitely has the aspect of "accumulating small advantages over the course of the game" and you can get to a situation where the enemy team just steamrolls you, League is more like chess than go in that there is a "checkmate" situation. The gold you have doesn't matter, the towers don't matter, the dragons don't matter except in how much they help you to take down the enemy nexus.
Therefore, objectively, it makes more sense to play it out. But this also goes back to toxicity: nobody wants to be trapped in game with an 0/20/2 mid/jg who's flaming all chat, spam pinging everyone and everything, and seems hell-bent on making sure that there's an extra 100 gold with every cannon wave mid by running straight into the enemy team 1v5. Why flame someone for wanting out?
What do you guys think?
NEWCOMERS
Like I said, this is my first real season actually dedicating time into this game. It was something social I could do in quarantine with my brother, wife, and a couple friends, and then I got into the competitive aspect a bit more. I studied it like I studied other things, namely by studying from experts, getting coaching where I could find it and playing a lot of games.
I felt comfortable in doing so because I have a great little group of friends that play and they were happy to teach me until I was comfortable enough to learn.
One thing I think that has improved in content-creation between when I first encountered the game in Season 7 and when I looked at it now is that it seems to be more widely understood that there are TWO sets of fundamentals in League. There are the basic mechanical aspects of how to play (abilities, last-hitting, towers, what jungle camps are and do, what each role does on a basic level, etc.) and then the more advanced decision making aspects (wave management, roaming, jungle timers/pathing, teamfighting, lane positioning, etc.).
The knowledge base required for League is actually massive, by the way, just like it is for almost any competitive game. The MINIMUM knowledge that I could see would be required to play like an actual human and not get smashed EVERY TIME is:

• An intimate understanding of at least one role and how that role relates to the team
• A strong understanding of at least a couple of champions, knowing how to play them, who counters them, who they counter, what runes to take, what items to generally build
• A basic understanding of basically every other champion in the game so you know what to look out for
• An ability to focus on several things at once (map, enemy movements, wave states, warding, enemy positioning, your own positioning).

Getting good requires expanding this knowledge base, as well as other aspects of the game. It's a lot to take in.
Combining this with the fact that you get punished for not being good (as covered earlier) and get flamed, told to uninstall, or even have homophobic/racial slurs and get told to kill yourself (which isn't as harmless to some people as you might think), the face of League is a very unfriendly one.
Which begs the question: how many more people would have fun and play this game if it weren't the baffling combination of complicated, difficult, and toxic?
​
COMMENTS/SUGGESTIONS FOR DISCUSSION
I've been thinking about making this post for a while, especially since Voyboy's famous video on community toxicity.
While I do think that Riot should not allow rampantly and obviously toxic behavior, the community has to do a lot of stepping up too.
Every time you personally int or type something shitty or are an asshole to others in-game, you show the rest of the players in your game that to some degree it is socially acceptable to do.
I ran a go club for a while, and if anyone treated a new player or an unskilled player half as poorly as I've seen inexperienced players treated (hell been treated as a new player), they would get a stern talking to and, if it continued, I would just kick them the fuck out. And nobody in my club would have batted an eye.
Wouldn't it be nice to have more people to play League with? And have the games be less toxic? Hell, maybe actually be fun?
The thrill of competition is a shared experience. If you have trouble with toxicity yourself, maybe just start by acknowledging that sometimes its okay for people to have a bad game, and its okay for your enemies to pop off sometimes. To feel otherwise is to torture yourself, as there's no way that (unless you're hard smurfing) you should expect to win 100% of your games with people at your rank.
But this goes beyond simply not being the guy who spends the game sitting under his turret typing and flaming his team. That should be a given if you want to see a less toxic game. It is the absolute bare minimum to not actively contribute to the things you don't want to see in game.
I think that if we want to improve the general environment of the game, we have to actively set examples and change what we think is acceptable conduct. Ignore or report bad conduct, but also add things you can do to improve the conditions.
Here are my thoughts on some stuff I think we can do as a community that will improve stuff:

• Reviewing as a courtesy. Reviewing a game with your opponent can be SO helpful. I think we're not in a place where an offer to go over the game with your enemy laner would be seen as anything but condescending, but maybe it might be better received if the loser asked to go over the game? Or at least have a brief discussion about it in the post-game chat.
• Coaching as a courtesy. The "Go Teaching Ladder" is a great service where lower rated go players would submit their games and higher rated players review them for free. The higher rated players also submit their games for review, so it runs off a combination of goodwill and fair exchange. This really wouldn't be hard to implement, honestly. What would you guys think of such a site/service? The flaw in this system is that a Bronze player might get incorrect information from a Plat player, but I think it's better than the Bronze player having at best Bronze information and at worst no information about how to improve.
• Acknowledging both your enemies and your allies for good play. Instead of flaming someone else or going into self-deprecation, maybe just trying to look more at what an opponent did well and just typing in post-game chat that they played well and giving a genuine "gg" would just help make things not so toxic constantly.
• Turning off chat. So we all know when we're being kind of toxic, right? If you can't help but type all game, then maybe just...remove your own ability to type? Just be the bigger person, realize you don't have the mental to avoid tilting your team even harder and just not do it. Conversely, if you know you have a weak mental and tilt easily or you're a brand new player and getting flamed all the time, it would also be good to disable chat while you get better. And I don't mean muting everyone or just "holding back" from typing. I mean clicking escape, going into your game settings and disabling both allied and team chat. The downside there is that you might miss calls and coordination in chat, but you can do most shotcalling with some creative pings and if you have a major problem with these things it can do more harm than good.
• Making reports actually matter. Reporting someone for having a bad game seems to be common, but I think it harms the game. If there are 10,000 reports submitted and 9,000 of them are for "inting," but only 500 of those reports were validly for people actually running into enemy turret and flaming in all-chat between death timers, then Riot can't punish people as effectively for actually ruining the game. They have to play the numbers game here, and if you punished everyone who was reported as having a bad game at the same level as everyone who was actually inting, you would ban half the player base. So then it takes more reports to actually act upon these things to try to weed out people just not doing well or learning a role/champ, so now the actual offenders get to play more games before they get punished.

Anyway, thoughts on my suggestions? Suggestions of your own? Comments? Critiques? This has been bugging me for ages and I wanted to talk about it.

Hi all
When I was 24 in 2006/07, I grinded a $50 deposit into playing NL200 and NL400 (i.e. 1/2 and 2/4 blinds), mostly on absolute poker, while I was at university. Obviously there are massive amounts of stories more impressive than mine, I thought some might get a kick out of what the games were like then vs now, and a few other thoughts.
Why I started again in 2020
I was a bit bored in lockdown but really enjoyed playing poker with friends over work (on a free site with video calls, with settling up $ after) so downloaded some poker clients to see what the games were like nowadays.
I ended up getting into it, signing up for upswing for 1 month and then RIO for 1 month (both good, but as you'll see below, probably not worth it given the state of the games).
I started in 2020 with a $150 deposit, and after ~70k hands it's sitting at $1300.
But the games are tough. I mean: insane. If you can't bet 25NL - don't feel bad. 25NL now is like 600NL used to be in 2006 and I'm not kidding. It's f'ing ridiculous. In 2006 if someone 3bet they had AK, AA, KK, or were a maniac.
I watched hours of upswing and RIO, and I can't believe the level these guys are teaching at. Literally no one was talking about blockers in 2006 at midstakes. Like, if someone had said I should vary call/bluff based on the fact that my hand held a busted flush draw I would have thought they were some weirdo ASD rainman. People probably did that at high stakes but they didn't talk about it.
Now, people seriously raise the question of whether the NL500 zoom is the toughest game on the planet, and it probably is! That is crazy! I was shit compared to good players, and I beat NL400 (non-zoom admittedly), for higher rates than the all but the very best players seem to beat NL500z!
Games in 2006/07
Let's talk about winrates. We used to measure winrates in "pokertracker big bets", which were 2x blinds. So if you played NL400 (I did), beat the game for 4ptbb/100 (I did), before rakeback (which I also got at ~50% on absolutepoker (lol) with bonuses + rakeback when rake was lower than it is now (!)), it meant that pre-rakeback I was winning at what people call 8bb/100 now. And then I got prolly 1.5bb/100 from rakeback as well.
I don't have my old pt database, but I have a saved old forum post when I "retired" (finished university, had 3 breakeven months at the 2007 games (lol), and got a professional job).
Over the 2 years I played an average of 14 hours a week, and won (with rakeback and bonuses) a total of $99 400 USD, for an average of $68 USD per hour.
Anyone remember that guy EMPIREMAKER2 or whatever his name was? Dude had played 100k hands at something like a 7ptbb/100 winrate (that is, 14bb/100) at NL$1000. Sure run hot but come on!
Games in 2020 and why it doesn't make sense to start poker now
Let's say the high point of poker for all but the very very best is the NL500zoom game. Let's say you can get 1k hands in per hour, and with bonuses, your winrate is 2bb/100. From my understanding, this is a very solid winrate at this game. That is 2 x 5 x 10 = $100 USD per hour.
That is pathetic. You would have to have immense natural talent, insane dedication, and huge grinding to build a massive bankroll to be rolled for it, and your reward is $100USD per hour?
Reality check: by the time you get to NL500zoom, it's probably harder than it is now, and the new game will be NL200zoom. Maybe you beat that for 4bb/100, and now your hourly rate is $80USD/hour. And what about next year?
In 2006/07, people talked about the good old days of 2004. In 2011, they were talking about 2007. In 2014, they were talking about pre-black friday. Now people hark back to 2014.
In 2025 they'll be talking about how easy the games were in 2020. If they're not it's because widespread real-time solvers have actually destroyed the game and it's just not being played.
Look at Doug Polk. Dude is a legend but is struggling coming back playing NL400 HU(down 30 buyins?) to train for his match against DNegs.
Mikka Anttonen put it well when he said (here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2POAdRI31vo) that it just doesn't make sense to start a poker career
Conclusion
I brokeven after bonuses/rakeback at my cashgames (NL10 to NL50) in 2020, but won a few MTTs which gave me all my profit. I'm not going to be playing any/much more online poker but I'll leave the money online in case I want to play some MTTs in a few weeks.
​
My suggestion:
- If you like poker as a hobby, softest online games are low stakes MTTs, so maybe fire up two of those if you're keen to play some poker.
- Seems like live poker is way easier. Home games are still fun.
- Cash games might be good for you if:

1. You live in a very poor country and incomes in the local economy are low AND
2. You are exceptionally smart and dedicated AND
3. You can't emigrate AND
4. You have exceptional mental strength/health and won't suffer the burnout all others would.

Anyway, hope this helps someone.

Conducted by ANON A review on what to expect from this up and coming project
Can be found on coingecko.
Within this post/document it will cover what $ACED & AceD as a whole is, what to expect, and questions you guys have asked alongside information on the current online gambling statistics for the world, especially sports betting.
> The reason I have gone to this effort is because I have never seen such a low MC project have so much potential, this is unironically a gem. I truly hope you all see the value in this. LONG READ.
What is $ACED and Acedbet.io?
> 500k MC at this current time of posting
> Ethereum-based Token Tokenomics, Symbol: $ACED, Decimals: 18, Type: ERC-20 Token, Total Supply: 200 Million AceD, Circulating supply: 190 Million AceD
> This IS A FULLY WORKING RPODUCT. They advertise: Multi Crypto, Sports & Esports, Fair Odds, and Full Anonymity for all betters.
> AceD bases its fundamentals in providing an alternative to existing centralized systems through the blockchain. Other than most cryptocurrencies that just provide anonymity, AceD plans on developing a privacy-orientated platform where the possibilities are endless. AceD’s mission is to provide online world class entertainment options while providing a secure and private platform.
> Multi Crypto Sportsbook, AceDBets, is a newly launched sportsbook that aims to provide a superior user experience. Custom-designed from the ground up, AceDBets combines a smooth, streamlined interface with social features that enable interactions with fellow cappers.
> “Our goal is to develop an appealing product that betters can enjoy, fair betting experience with 0 downtime. Place a bet from anywhere in the world, totally anon compatible on any device. Demand will increase with improvements. Poker will also be a major driver.”
What the original AceD and the recent move to being a ERC-20 Token? why it happened:
> “AceD started out in June 2018 as a POS/Masternode coin. We decided to swap to ethereum chain in June 2020. Some bad characters were exploiting the chain stealing masternode rewards and selling them on exchange. Updates were too costly with centralized exchanges so the move to ethereum chain was the direction we agreed on. So basically, the main reason why we moved to Ethereum chain is to focus on product development and not worry about blockchain issues. We have Vitalik looking after our chain, no need to develop a blockchain ourselves.”
Did any tokens get lost?
> I asked about this and they said the 200million listed on etherscan is the full amount. Investors initially assumed that tokens were lost originally with the swap, but that is not the case.
The major thing a lot of you guys wanted to know about were the Team, Whitepapers and Roadmaps:
> “Expect team info to be available within the new couple days. Whitepaper draft has already started alongside roadmap, expect publishment within 2 weeks or so.”
> “We also plan to hire more staffing to fill the downtime as our userbase is increasing rapidly need to adapt with demand Over 1200 users signed up total. The total amount of team members we have is 10 (6 developers).”
I asked about bingo not working after being advertised as working, got a nice response, good to see priorities being taken care of:
> “Bingo has been taken offline temporarily; we’ll revisit the product as it requires some attention. AceDbets.io/sports betting is our primary focus right now.”
Considering live sports betting is the only thing running at the moment, what is the current daily, weekly, total wagered through you guys, how do the tokens get redistributed?
> “We shared a chart showing steady growth in bets over the past 3 months. Betting volume is out the roof this month, NBA resumes next week expecting even bigger volumes to roll in with major sports resuming. July numbers will be shared in 3-4 days. Currently there is no dividends model for users, the bankroll profits help fund development and future marketing goals.”
I find that last part interesting, could potentially be implemented as a system to reward staking if it were introduced. Hmm.
​
​
ACED and their future. What they plan on doing with Acedbet.io and their product as a whole.
What is there to look forward to in the next upcoming update, Any set time release? (This is in relation to the website and the extra features they plan to add to their sports betting. I have seen a lot of people comment on it.)
> “No firm date for the update, however we’re in the final stages of testing. It is a massive update for our platform need to ensure everything is down right and functional before we make the transition. Always room for improvement, the new update has many changes which will improve the user experience. We will continue to make changes, always listening to feedback and suggestions from our community.”
> “Support desk is being introduced along with update, where users will have access to knowledge tools, how to use acedbets, understanding betting odds, rules for events and quick support with ticketing system.”
> “in the near future we plan to introduce betting and bankroll management tracking tools. to help a better understand their track record.”
> “Updates will be provided in stages, we find that a more effective approach instead of blasting one big update every few months.”
This update is essential for the QOL of this product, the team seems to be absolutely working their arses off.
Ok, onto the future updates then:
THE BIG QUESTION? WHEN POKER?
> “Focus is on acedbets.io right now. There are not many bugs left, one major one with All IN freeze up issue and then a bunch of minor visual bugs that need to be ironed out. This will be revealed in our roadmap, we hope to have the product live in Q42020. It’s 80% complete with a few user facing bugs that will be addressed when we resume development in August.”
> “After poker, we will be adding more games to the platform such as Keno, Bingo, Roulette, Blackjack. Considering adding live dealers as well.”
WHEN STAKING?
> “Staking on platform will be introduced eventually not sure of the timeline for this. We would have a community vote on how to fund the staking model, a certain amount of coins could be minted for example to support long tem staking.”
I personally find this part to be interesting, if they manage to pull off a staking + betting crypto site, where potentially dividends could be paid off to stakers, etc. it would be crazy, never seen anything like this.
WHEN EXCHANGE?
> “Waiting for IDEX to reply, we have followed up and our listing request is now with their manager for review. We are actively seeking new exchanges and will find a better alternative to graviex very soon. IDEX application submitted, being reviewed by their listing manager.”
WHEN MARKETING?
> “We will be ramping up marketing after our acedbets.io update. Social media, influencers, AMA’s podcasts, some fun contests, publishing articles on major crypto sites, telegram and discord server promotions, partnerships.”
WHEN WILL YOU MAKE BLOG POSTS AGAIN?
> We will be appointing 2 team members to handle our social media profiles. This includes our medium account. All information will be available on acedcoin.com and medium.
I am unsure of anymore future updates as they have said they do not want to make too many promises. I believe with the roadmap release we will be able to get a grand idea of the project. PLEASE DO NOT BE AFRAID TO JOIN THE DISCORD AND SUGGEST IDEAS, THEY LOVE ALL INPUT AND TAKE IT SERIOUSLY.
​
Why bother investing in this?
> How about you guys have a look at the online gambling market predictions for the next 10 years…
> “The global online gambling market size was valued at USD 53.7 billion in 2019 and is expected to grow at a compound annual growth rate (CAGR) of 11.5% from 2020 to 2027. The high internet penetration and increasing use of mobile phones among individuals for playing online games from their homes and public places are driving the market.
In addition, factors such as easy access to online gambling, legalization and cultural approval, corporate sponsorships, and celebrity endorsements are also contributing to market growth. The growing availability of cost-effective mobile applications across the globe is further expected to fuel market growth.”
THIS PUTS A $104B VALUATION EXPACTATION FOR 2025.
IT THEN GOES ON TO SAY THIS: > “ The growing number of sports followers across the globe has fuelled the demand for sports betting. The majority of bets are placed on boxing, baseball, football, and hockey sports, which is, in turn, driving the market.
Increasing the development of new technologies such as virtual reality and blockchain is also driving the growth of the industry. This may be attributed to the fact that several companies are now integrating the blockchain technology into their online gambling business. This helps them ensure transparency in gambling activities and offer enhanced user experience. In addition, blockchain-based gambling platforms are completely decentralized and are free of third-party influence.”
They LITERALLY KNOW AND INCLUDE BLOCKCHAIN in their report. THEY KNOW IT WILL BE A BIG INFLUENCE IN YEARS TO COME. Even with COVID-19, AceD covers every sport you could think of that would be running right now, it even has E-Sports. This market prediction, alongside the ACED betting website WITH FULL ANONYMITY… This is going to blow. Once more betting options are released too, especially live poker. Man, you guys better be ready, do not complain about not getting in. I have laid this all out for you, now the choice is yours.
The closest thing that even compares to $ACED is 25mc, and then the next is 40mc. Neither have Anonymous gambling. Once $ACED gains more features, they will be far ahead of these other platforms.
​
EXTRAS
What are you current biggest draw backs? what is stopping you guys from really excelling and achieving these visions faster?
> “Funding, our goal is to build a self-sustainable model with acedbets.io and we are well on our way to achieving this. We would also like to introduce more entertainment options such as live streaming with tip functionality. With our growing userbase I think we can attract a lot of streamers to use our platform to share their content. In order to achieve these, we can have community votes on coins being minted and offered as OTC crowd sale.”
Legal troubles, could this happen with the anonymous betting? Once you guys do pop off and blow up, will this bite you? I don’t personally see a reason for it to but please explain if there would be.
> “Currently, we don’t offer betting in fiat currencies, our platform is strictly crypto therefore a gaming license is not required to operate in this space. However, if need be we are prepared to comply with any changes and a gaming license would be obtained if required.”
If the site does get hacked or anything happens, how safe are everyone’s funds? Sorry if this is rather random it’s just good to know.
> “All funds deposited into acedbets.io are moved over to cold storage. We only keep a small threshold to payout daily withdrawals which is replenished on a daily basis.”
Wtf went on with DGN? saw a lot of fud > “I was in touch with Bubba-Degen (founder of DGN) , announcement was made on their discord. The FUD started due to couple members requesting a refund and were unhappy with the announcement of launch date being extended to upcoming Friday. The 2 guys went ahead and started spamming telegram groups with false information and accusing DGN as scammers. The DGN token will be listed on acedbets.io this weekend and the project will be live be going live on Uniswap on Friday. “

Link to Previous Tales From 2+2: Poker player steals $1m+ chips and tries to sell it on 2+2 poker forums More Tales From 2+2: A Very Controversial $70k prop bet If you or a friend are familiar with online poker and want to see the unedited version of this post then click here
Here's another Tales From 2+2 post, this one is a bit longer but well worth the read. It follows the story of an online poker player posting on the 2+2 online poker forums and that takes him on the ride of a lifetime. I have made some light edits so it's easier to understand for non poker players, my explanations are within [these brackets]. If you want to understand how to play the poker watch this 3 minute how to play poker video.

Still Booming

The year is 2010.
The effects of the 2003 poker boom are still being felt and Black Friday [Black Friday is when online poker was forced to shut down in the USA, it hit the industry hard] is a year away.
Americans, Europeans, Australians and almost the whole world are playing side by side on Pokerstars and Full Tilt [The two biggest online sites at the time]. Hundreds of people are signing up for poker sites each day. Tournament guarantees are at an all-time high. Poker sites’ pockets are overflowing and sites are offering generous bonuses and promotions. Poker TV is popular worldwide and Poker After Dark just entered its 6th season. The 2+2 poker forums are in full swing, it’s the epicenter of poker communication. Dozens of threads are made on popular subforums like NVG (News, Views and Gossip) or BBV (Beats, Brags and Variance) every day.
BBV is a subforum of 2+2 where the moderation is far laxer than the rest of the 2+2. People often create posts showing off their tournament wins or lamenting huge downswings. After the initial post is made, the trolls would descend and replies like this were often seen:

Colin_Piddle: Ur a clown OP
Tank Home & Away: Somebody call Donald Trump. OP thinks online poker is rigged.
FranFran: Shut up. Idiot.
Dave Coulier: LOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL OLLOLOLOLOLOLOL

The BBV Post

On 20th Feb 2010 Jared Huggins, posting under RelaxedPrecision, visits BBV to vent his frustration over busting his meager roll playing 100nl HU:

RelaxedPrecision: Beat: HU vs drooler, lost my $100 bankroll ($100 table obv.)
He raised preflop every single hand including out of position.
Called 75% of my three bets with trash.
Only pot bet, regardless of board, his holdings, or position.
He is -$1132 in 2000 hands, -33/bb 100
We played 250 hands.
This guy was a corpse and I ran so cold it was insane. Only hitting any pair or a decent draw a couple of times. Twilight zone.
Brag: Not homeless again till the end of the month. Getting a third job today. This week I've begged for food at fast food joints and have scored two steak tacos and 1 piece of chicken.

[Jared is complaining that he lost the last of his poker bankroll, $100] The usual procedure in BBV is for the BBV regulars to berate the original poster, usually in meme form. Jared’s thread is no exception:

Sobad87: FAIIIIIIL, homeless shelters exist for a reason.
SmilingOrange: rock bottom itt
Sump: in b4 homeless

However, the thread takes a darker turn when Jared starts to post more details about his living and financial situation.

RelaxedPrecision: I'm 5 peanuts and 2 cups of water into my day. Finding some awesome links about food for broke people in LA. RelaxedPrecision: Last time round, 6 month period, I chose cruising the back streets near my job/sleeping in car, rather than driving hours per day to/from shelter and risking jail/car impoundaments/belongings confiscated.

Jared seems to be not only in dire poverty but also grinding microstakes [microstakes in poker is buying in for $2-10 dollars] for any cash he can get. He posts that the roll he lost was from a referral payment on a poker website but he cant’t withdraw it. The posters start to get a little more sympathetic:

FastPlaySlow: Wow. I feel bad for ya OP.
Kidlover: Keep your head up bro. Gimme a call if you want

A user named Airwave16 offers helps in his own way:

airwave16: create youtube vid of you dancing to around the world by daft punk in your boxers with a large sign that says "i love burningbend" and i'll ship you $30

Within 40 minutes Jared accepts this:

RelaxedPrecision: Never thought I'd do something like this, but I don't have much choice.
RelaxedPrecision: Don't want to go back to living in my car. Last month some guys tried to break into my car while I was inside of it. Terrible experience.

The next day, to the surprise of many he posts a video on Youtube of him around his room, just as Airwave16 asked. Unfortunately the video is lost to time but this small photo of the video remains. 2+2 posters start to show more compassion when they see how desperate Jared is for money:

mcfals02: Hilarious video. Hope you run good at life soon OP.
shikari424: If you've got a ftp [Full Tilt Poker,] account i'll ship something over bro[money could be sent between accounts], made me laugh

Ccuster_911 then offers a little more money for another challenge:

Ccuster_911 : Make a video of you going outside on the streets in LA offering people free HUGs(holding a sign ldo), I will ship you 30$, I want at least 10 random people being hugged

Others start to offer extra money to shoot this video:

cds0699: I'll chip in $10 for this.
Greeson08: $20 more here...$30 more if you paint yourself green before doing the hug thing.

Jared is very thankful for the support and lets his fellow posters know:

RelaxedPrecision: I'm really overwhelmed and surprised. Thank you guys so much, you have no idea how good it feels that people on 2+2 would reach out to me like this. I'm totally blown away. Thank you so much. This is one of the best things that has happened to me in a very long time.
Talked to the lady who rented me this room for 2 weeks. I got 5 days left here, then I'm back living in my car.
I am going to do everything in my power to get back on my feet. I am so close. Every suggestion, I will do. I'll dance for penny. I'll come to your house and clean your toilet. That's where my mind is at

A user asks for him to take a photo with ‘Free Pageh’ on his head, he posts this

swd805: that pic is disturbing
RelaxedPrecision: Mission accomplished.

Jared gives an insight into his mood while performing these tasks

RelaxedPrecision: Please do laugh at me. I laugh at myself as much as possible.
I cried twice. 1st when Airwave propositioned me and I felt different inside, like "time to get desperate man". It was a nasty feeling.
2nd time I cried, when I finished the video & began to ask myself whether or not I would do various things for $ & heard some of the answers in my head.
Both times I fought the tears back & realized I got no choice, need the $. So let's get some more ideas & keep this ball rolling. You guys are helping me, thank you

He also gives insight into his poor mental state and reveals that a 2+2 poster gave him a small stake [someone will send Jared money to play and Jared will split the profits]:

RelaxedPrecision: My friend (who's house I crashed at) is a pro MMA fighter , he lets me attend his MMA/BJJ class once a week. At class today, he yelled at me for doing a takedown wrong. I had a meltdown & broke down in tears in front of the class cuz I've barely eaten in 6 days. Shed 12 pounds this week. Just real drained.
Prop update: Got staked to play $5 Sit n Go's [a one table tournament] on FTP. 5 hours of play, up a few bucks.
4 days till I'm homeless again.

Jared tells a story and hatches a plan while working at his new job:

RelaxedPrecision: Today, this big husky girl with linebacker shoulders came in2 my job today to buy shoes...size 11. She looks exactly like a man. She had this big lady with her who told me the size 11 girl liked me. So I gave her my digits. I hope she calls me soon. If she calls me I'm going to try & seduce her & go live with her. Wherever she lives, I'm sure there's plenty of food.

Over the next few hundred posts the mood of the thread becomes caring and many people are asking Jared about his current lifestyle. He tells the thread about his struggles with permanent housing, a bad back, hunger and employment. He posts photos of his car (where he sleeps) and a video of him dancing at work. Jared reveals intimate parts of himself and his passion for writing and music. He also posts that he has encountered problems with substance abuse and has been sober for a while. The trickle of small donations from posters becomes a steady flow:

JeReMyHaSSpoKen: pm me western union or paypal And ill ship you some cash
Greeson08: Jared, hit me up on Skype. Sending $11.11 via FTP.

A month after Jared creates the BBV thread, March 9th, Jared posts the long awaited video of him hugging strangers that Ccuster_911 requested. Luckily, the video is still on YouTube. Here is the link. At this point he fittingly reveals his name is Jared Huggins and his nickname in school was Huggy. His fans love the video and let him know:

Doomriders: amazing nice job brothaa
cds0699: Very amazing vid and I wish you nothing but the best
Talking Poker: Video is awesome. Thread is awesome. You are awesome.

And he really enjoyed the experience:

RelaxedPrecision: I was surprised by the number of people who literally RAN into my arms.
It was a day & an experience that I will never forget.
If you enjoy the video half as much as I enjoyed making it, I'll be happy.

He tells 2+2 more about his life:

RelaxedPrecision: You guys reaching out to me is very much appreciated. I've had my fair share of obstacles in life. Born in a crack house, father died when I was 9, mother is an alcoholic, one brother a heroine addict, the other a crack dealer who was beaten and left for dead and never fully recovered his mind.
Last year ran bad at life...lost my job, ripped my meniscus in two places, had a terrible reaction to prescription stress meds..etc etc. I ended up living in my calosing contact with my family... cuz my cousin is hooked on muscle relaxers & vicodin and it hurts too much to watch people I love hurt themselves.We all have challenges, and obstacles. Life is tough for everybody.
I'm healthy, normal, moving in a positive direction

Jared’s birthday comes on the 12th of March and many posters wish him a happy birthday. At this point the donations from 2+2 posters continue and totals $1k. A few weeks later and Jared posts an amusing and NSFW story about living in a car. It’s long and not essential to the story so I won’t quote it. Read it here.
Jared thanks the community again:

RelaxedPrecision: I've never had people care about me like this before, let alone strangers.
From the bottom of my heart I would like to thank all of you.

The Big Game

Poker TV was very popular in 2010. The WSOP and other TV shows were broadcast across America and other countries. Pokersites were very keen on poker advertising appearing on TV, it was a very effective way to promote online poker sites. Full Tilt sponsored and regularly advertised on Poker After Dark. Full Tilt is even included in the show's title, which for a time prompted players associated with Pokerstars to stop appearing on the show. Pokerstars did not have as big a presence on TV as Full Tilt and they wanted to change that. How better than creating their own show? They would be able to have a majority of Pokerstars pros on TV and have players wearing their advertising patches.
Thus, Pokerstars created The Big Game. The Big Game was a televised cash game [a cash game is different to a tournament, the players' chips represent cash explained more here] with a novel concept: each episode featured a loose cannon. The loose cannon is a recreational player, who is given $100k to play 150 hands of high stakes poker. The loose cannon gets to keep any profits from their session and the biggest winner from the season also gets $50k in NAPT tournament entrance costs. Any Pokerstars player is welcome to try to become the Loose Cannon.
The line ups consisted of some popular pros who have a lively table presence like Daniel Negreanu, Phil Hellmuth and Tony G. It also had some of the strongest players of the time like Ike Haxton and Phil Galfond. Joe Stapleton made his debut on the show as an announcer. He who would go on to do a great deal of poker commentating over the next decade. Each episode aired on The Fox Network and Pokerstars.tv.
In the same BBV thread Jared started, one of the posters has a bright idea:

MasterWolf: I think you should apply to be a Loose Cannon on the Big Game. I know you'd get tons of 2+2 support, plus, you are awesome at making videos.

One of the Jared’s strongest supporters on 2+2 takes a keen interest in this idea:

John_Wray: THIS! Is this something we can make happen? I don't know anything about the process.

Others agree:

Rusemandingo: Would be amazing.
AyinHara: for the producers of the Big Game, this is an easy one. snap it up!
King Fish: PokerStars Steve was looking for 2p2 recommendations awhile ago. I sent him a text nominating OP but have not heard back. I suggest all of you PM him, and point him to this thread. Would make a much better story than anyone on here, and he has the video to back up both the story and personality already shot.

But how can Jared apply to go on The Big Game?
Pokerstars run several tournament qualifiers for The Big Game on Pokerstars. These are details taken from The Big Game website:

There are free-to-enter Big Game Round 1 satellites running four times a day. Finish in the top 300 and you’ll advance to Round 2. Make it into the top 1,000 in a Round 2 tournament and you’ll get a seat in the Big Game Final Round qualifier. All players that finish in the top 200 in the final will be invited to send PokerStars a casting video, telling us why you think you should be on TV’s best new cash game show. Impress us with your video and you’ll be heading off to Las Vegas to star on the show as a Loose Cannon qualifier. Once the video is posted, people will vote on the their favourite video.

The freerolls are popular and attract about 5000 people for each round 1 freeroll. Jared would need to finish in the top 6% of the round 1 freeroll then he’ll be in the round 2 freeroll, he would need to finish in the top 15% to qualify for round 3. In round 3, only 200 qualify to make a video. The round 2 and 3 qualifier only ran once a week so Jared had a limited amount of attempts.
John_Wray starts a new thread in support of Jared being considered to be a loose cannon on The Big Game. Within 24 hours the thread has over 400 posts, most of them people putting down their support for Jared to be on The Big Game.
Boosted J hears of Jared’s story and posts in the petition thread. Boosted J is the screen name of Justin Smith, a skilled professional player. Boosted J offers Jared a potential job, poker coaching and access to his private mental coach. Boosted J would go on to get Jared in a Dr Dre video as an extra.
At this point RelaxedPrecision is one year sober and life is looking good for him. He posts a video rapping about overcoming life’s obstacles. Daniel Negreanu notices and tweets about his rap:

RealKidPoker: Homeless guy Jared Huggins rapping about being sober 1 year, powerful lyrics. Guy has an amazing story to tell.

John_Wray reports that Jared has already started playing the freeroll qualifiers [a freeroll is a free to enter tournament]:

John_Wray: Jared's in a hotel tonight grinding the freerolls .

Jared is ready to play all four round 1 qualifiers on days he had free:

RelaxedPrecision: Going to grind as many of these things as humanly possible.
RelaxedPrecision: I got out my schedule for the month, there will be for sure be days coming up where I will play all 4 first round games.

Support pours in:

CrazyNL: awsome man gl
NomoneyHU: I'd like to wish you good luck man , i'm currently watching your video. Happy that things is going your way from now! I hope that you do qualify for the PS Big Game and ship all the manies.
Sump: I hope you win this and double up on Big Game, ship the NAPT Passport

People start to watch him play and offer him advice. Jared found the journey hard at times:

RelaxedPrecision: Watched guys ship all in preflop with 72o for 4 hours straight. I get an above average stack, get it in with 10 10, run it smack dab into KK. And encountered his fair share of bad beats: RelaxedPrecision: Survive that, get it in with. 58 on a 8s7h6d flop vs Js7s, turn and river are spades, and it's time for a cold shower. lol

[Here he is saying that he feels the other players in the tournament are not playing well but he feels when he played well he felt he was unlucky]
Jared starts a new day of round 1 qualifiers, ready to play all 4.

RelaxedPrecision: Fresh day of freerolls starts in 20 minutes. Playing more aggressive today. Feeling optimistic.

He starts playing a round 1 tournament qualifier and is doing well. He’s getting closer:

pokernutssss: 322/379! 79 to go GL jared
John_Wray: just fold into the win now. you've got enough chips

Until:

MicroRoller: Congrats! 1 down 2 to go.
RelaxedPrecision: YEEEEEEEEEEHAW!!!
Feels good to be out of round 1. Just gotta find a way to run good [getting lucky]!

The next day, Jared enters round 2 and plays this hand in the middle stages:

Poker Stars Freeroll No Limit Hold'em Tournament - t500/t1000 Blinds + t250 - 9 players
BSKid (BTN): t47500 M = 12.67
bones_522004 (SB): t119200 M = 31.79
tanwaruw (BB): t59200 M = 15.79
carlo 1959 (UTG): t1500 M = 0.40
mydream4u (UTG+1): t16200 M = 4.32
berdootim (UTG+2): t47150 M = 12.57
dickblow (MP1): t1750 M = 0.47
Life Guru (MP2): t42350 M = 11.29
Jared Huggins (CO:) with 6s6c : t9300 M = 2.48
Pre Flop: (t3750)
4 folds, Life Guru raises to t2000, Jared Huggins raises to t9050 all in, 3 folds, Life Guru calls t7050
Flop: (t21850) TcQh7s (2 players - 1 is all in)
Turn: (t21850) Jh (2 players - 1 is all in)
River: (t21850)Jd (2 players - 1 is all in)

Final Pot: t21850 Life Guru shows 8dAc (a pair of Jacks) Jared Huggins shows 6s6c (two pair, Jacks and Sixes) Jared Huggins wins t21850 [Jared plays well and wins]

RelaxedPrecision: **** yeah

But then falls:

John_Wray: ugh. You played great though.

After Jared asks about poker training sites, Taylor Caby pops into the thread to offer Jared membership to his training site: CardRunners:

Green Plastic: Hey Jared,
if you'd like to try out CardRunners for free shoot me a PM, I'll have someone set you up over there.

After making a few deep runs in the round 1 tournaments, Jared has several round 2 tickets and is putting his newly found membership to good use:

RelaxedPrecision: Won 3/4 round 1 tournaments today. Now I have four round 2 Tokens saved. Watching Cardrunner.com videos all day tommorrow, and grinding more freerolls

A few days later and Jared makes the final round of freerolls:

Amnestia: gg, jared, good luck in round 3 Isitdur?: It would be the sickest rags to riches story ever if you got on The Big Game, Jared. I really hope you do it. Good luck in Round 3 I will be railing along with all of your other supporters!

Jared registers and plays a round three qualifier tournament and encounters this hand:

Preflop: Jared Huggins in MP1 with AcKc
UTG bets t1200, Jared Huggins raises to t3000, 1 fold, MP2 calls t3000, MP3 calls t3000, 4 folds, UTG calls t1800
Flop: (t14250) 3c6sKs (4 players)
UTG checks, Jared Huggins bets t10000, MP2 calls t10000, MP3 calls t1950 (All-In), 1 fold
Turn: (t36200) Ac (3 players, 1 all-in)
Jared Huggins bets t25000, MP2 raises to t26050 (All-In), Jared Huggins calls t1050
River: (t88300) 4d (3 players, 2 all-in)
Total pot: t88300
Results: Jared Huggins shows AcKc (two pair, Aces and Kings). MP2 shows Js9s (flush, Ace high). MP3 shows KdTs (one pair, Kings). Outcome: MP2 won t88300 [Jared plays well but get unlucky in a large pot and is out of this round 2 tournament]

Jared is out and continues to grind the qualifying tournaments. A week later and he registers for a round three freeroll and is going deep. A fan posts his position:

MasterWolf: Current Stats: 81,262 chips. avg: 142,959. position 247 / 348. Top 200 get in

Jared gets closer…

MasterWolf: 44 left. he's got 7th shortest stack in tourney. BUT HE CAN DO IT! Go Jared!!

Jared wins a key pot:

John_Wray: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM
NomoneyHU: SSHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP PPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jared gets increasingly close but is very shortstacked [doesn't have many chips]:
The railbirds [players who watch online poker] watch on:

__27__: Never been so happy railing [watching] a freeroll, this is some crazy ****.

Hard bubble and the tournament goes hand for hand [this means there is only 1 player left to go out, when they do all remaining players qualify for the video round]:

MasterWolf: 1 person left

Jared posts. He has qualified!

RelaxedPrecision: I can't believe this is actually happening.

Jared has done it. With the full support of his fan base Jared is one big step closer to getting onto The Big Game. The posters go crazy in his sweat thread and dozens of people congratulate him.
Afterwards, Pokerstatic interview Jared and he opens up about his difficult upbringing and life. Link to summary here.
Jared is very popular on 2+2 and has a keen fan base but not everyone likes the attention and donations Jared is getting. Later on a Jared opposition thread would be created. Here’s an example of opposition towards Jared:

Lchampag: Its just the way everyone here is completely giving this story all their faith. Just reminds me of those old people that get scammed is all.
I work in the coal mining industry. Pay starts out at around $20/h for the first six months(for"red hats") and then goes to around 25 after that for a general laborer. There are men hired at my mines everyday, come and get a freaking job! I guess this work is too hard for those that would just rather get handouts...

Some people were upset he was getting so much in donations. In 2010 he received $6k from 2+2 members. Jared’s fans respond with posts like this:

Srkbigdaddy: i dont know why people would bother posting in a thread that actually has a ton of heart with their snide and rude remarks. obviously its okay to post your feelings but if they are not gonna help the situation then they are pointless. you are basically just stepping on someone who is down

John Wray gives an update on Jared and his health:

John Wray: Jared is seeing his therapist again, and has just moved into a new place. He's very happy with it as it is within his price range and his landlord is a former deacon. They plan to attend services together on Sundays.
His bad back is still a big problem, one that needs to be addressed immediately.

Grayson Physioc also known as Spacegravy on 2+2 is a SNG [Sit 'n' Go, a one table tournament] crusher who fought his way from from microstakes to highstakes [A common story for skilled players to deposit $100 on a pokersite, fight their way up the ranks and turn it into millions]. He arrives in the thread and offers to fly Jared to Maimi and coach him, Jared flies out and posts this from Miami:

RelaxedPrecision: Spacegravy flew me out here to Miami to learn Sit N Go's, I'm totally blown away! He is an A+ human being! Haven't gone to the beach, haven't gone sight-seeing, haven't gone anywhere, just straight up grinding poker. Grinding as much as possible!

While in Miami, Jared’s mind is on making the best video he can to ensure he gets onto The Big Game. John_Wray helped, by the 28th of October it is finished and posted.
Jared’s Big Game Audition Tape
November the first rolls by and the audition tapes of all the qualifiers are uploaded and ready to be voted on. Jared is looking good and is in second place with 1.1k votes.
2nd November and Jared returns from Miami. He’s up $800 on SNGs from his time playing and getting mentored by SpaceGravy.
The weeks pass by. People can vote on one video per day so Jared’s fans are visiting and voting as much as they can:

8Nilor: Voting everyday btw. and got others to also.

The thread builds with excitement. With so many fans in the poker world Jared is sure to be selected to go on The Big Game. In December, Jared posts that all is going well with him. He has two jobs and a room to stay in. Jared gives a few updates:

RelaxedPrecision: When I'm not at work, I am working on my game everyday, grinding 50NL 6 max deep on Stars, going over hand histories, and getting coaching when I can.

[50nl deep is a type of poker played with 6 maximum players on the table buying in for $50-100]
2011 begins. In January the voting closes and Jared can only wait.
And then the news that Jared and many 2+2 posters have been waiting for is here. Jared notices an email from Pokerstars. He reads the news from Pokerstars about The Big Game.
He receives the results and rushes to 2+2 to share the news:

RelaxedPrecision: I got an email from PokerStars informing me that I was not selected to compete as a Loose Cannon on next season’s PokerStars Big Game. I wasn’t given any specific reason why I wasn’t selected, but I was thanked for trying out.
TwoPlusTwo.com, thank all of you for supporting me and showing me love. To be loved was a dream come true for me. I'm convinced that love cures most illness.

Jared was not successful. It's crushing news to the community. All their efforts spent helping Jared onto The Big Game was for nothing.
The community reply to the news:

AlienSpaceBat: Wow, Jared, I'm really sorry to hear this
Isitdur?: So bummed to hear this news, Jared.
2ndUnit: I am very, very disappointed of this decision by PS. Don't let it bring you down Jared, keep going.

A few weeks pass and there’s not much news from Jared. He settles back into working and improving his situation.

It’s all over

Jared had not made the cut for The Big Game.
But it’s not all bad.
Jared is in a much better position than he was a year ago.
He has a roof over his head and steady employment.
The past year was a crazy ride for him and he’s made many friends from 2+2.
His poker skill is improving and he has top players coaching him.
But no one predicted what would happen next month.
In the middle of February 2011, a Pokerstars representative dropped into 2+2 to post unbelievable news:

PokerstarsSteve: The seven Loose Cannons scheduled for the July 2011 showing of The PokerStars.net Big Game are:
Gonzales Cannon II - Sacramento, CA
Courtney Gee - Vancouver BC
Jared Huggins - Los Angeles, CA
Massimiliano Martinez - Rome, Italy
Cari Bershell - Las Vegas, NV
Kenneth Hrankowski - Vancouver BC
Anton Dunyushkin - Moscow, Russia

Jared Huggins is confirmed to appear on The Big Game Season 2. This is shocking to the community because there was no knowledge on 2+2 that he was even considered for season 2. The community erupts:

ak47: YESSSSSSSSSSSSS!
ROADHEAD: WOW NO WAY, WHAT THE HECK JUST HAPPENED!!
MrPowell222: WOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOO!
TayWolf55: GO GO GO GO GO Jared!

Almost exactly a year after living in his car and making his BBV thread he has the shot of a lifetime for fame and fortune.
But first, Jared needs to prepare for the biggest shot of his life.
Jared dedicates four months to preparation for going on The Big Game. He plays as much online cash game poker as he can. He has access to a training site and receives free coaching from top pros. To simulate The Big Game he plays 50,000 hands of 6max deep online [6max deep is the poker format played on The Big Game] and even plays tough opponents who would drop down in stakes to play with him.
In 2011 he makes three trips from LA to Las Vegas to practice and get used to live play. He practices chip handling, breathing and getting comfortable going from online to live. He reads Caro’s Books of Tells and would sit at the lowest stakes while studying every player closely. He never parties on these trips, just play and study.
He watches all 72 episodes of The Big Game Season 1 and analyzes every hand. While watching he would have seen Season 1’s biggest winner, Bob Ferdinand, win $181,500 and $50k in NAPT tournament entries.
In this time Jared remakes his Free Hugs video and once again, wanders LA shores with a sign and offers free hugs to the public. Jared uses some of the money from this video and donates $1k to charity. Reshot video here
The line up for The Big Game is announced:
Seat 1: Jared Huggins
Seat 2: Nick Cassavetes – A recreational player. Cassavetes works in the film industry.
Seat 3: Barry Greenstein – Poker legend known for his ‎Philanthropy
Seat 4: Vanessa Selbst – An aggressive and skilled player. Won NAPT Mohegan Sun Main Event back to back.
Seat 5: Antonio Esfandiari – An accomplished player who would go on to win The Big Drop for $18m next year.
Seat 6: Prahlad Friedman – An experienced cash game player. Played under Spirit Rock and used to crush online games
Reserve: Phil Lakk - An entertaining professional player.
There are certainly some tough opponents on this table. Fortunately, Jared has a recreational player on his left [at the poker table players on the left are more likely to apply pressure than players on the right. Because Cassavetes is a recreational player he should be applying less pressure on Jared than a pro].
The community reacts:

blackjacki2: hard lineup
J0hny: Best of luck to you !

Then the day of filming arrives. Jared drives to Las Vegas to play in the biggest cash game of his life. He’s had months of training for this one moment. Hundreds of people on 2+2 are following his progress and Jared will soon be broadcast across the USA playing with seasoned professionals.

Now, the story is almost at an end. You have three options on how to consume the finale:

1. You can watch all four episodes of The Big Game to see what happens, links below. When you are finished watching, click the spoiler box below and read the end of the story.
2. If you don’t want to watch all 4 episodes then I’ve posted some timestamped links of Jared’s biggest hands, I’ve linked one hand per episode. There are 12 minutes of clips. When you are finished watching, click the spoiler box below and read the end of the story.
3. If you don’t want to watch any Big Game then click the spoiler box below and read on. [If you want to watch some of The Big Game it may be a good idea to watch this video I linked in the introduction again]

Full Episodes

Full episode. 1st episode
Full episode. 2nd episode
Full episode. 3rd episode
Full episode. 4th episode
Full episode. 5th episode

Highlights – Jared’s Biggest Hands

Jared Hand 1, watch from 35:00 - 37:28
Jared Hand 2, watch from 35:00 - 36:45
Jared Hand 3, watch from 39:40 - 42:10
Jared Hand 4, watch from 10:15 – 17:10

Epilogue

Jared did not end up profiting on the episode. He played until hand 126 of 150 when he ran his QQ into Cassavetes’ KK. Jared doesn’t hit and is off The Big Game.[KK is the second best hand in poker and QQ is the third best, so it was unlucky for Jared to get QQ and another player has KK. However, Jared was playing poorly and too passively in other hands in the episodes]
Posts from 2+2 were mixed, many posts in the thread were not kind towards his play. The community criticized some of the hands he played:

Jazzed23: the dude played like crap. No 3 betting, no bluffing, no floating and turn barrelling. he was playing scared and tight. Blew away $25k just by folding.
cobrastatus: How could this guy... get so much free coaching... and be so terrible...
trip_kings12: what a waste of a week for this show. Jared, the loose cannon, was almost unbearable to watch. I doubt I've ever seen a tighter, more scared loose cannon in all my years in poker.

[The posters here are saying that he was playing poorly and passively]
One fan posts this:

LolDonkamentz: I'll admit I was kind of disappointed with the result of this. I enjoyed all the build up and was really excited for this to be the climax of the Jared Huggins saga but it wasn't to be. His awkwardness at the table combined with his below average performance made for bad television

And Jared replied:

RelaxedPrecision: To you and others Donkamentz, sorry if I wasn't able to do my part to entertain you. It's a big show with lots of people on it, so I don't feel solely responsible for your entertainment, any more than I feel responsible for not hitting a huge hand. Thank you for caring about how I did.

Most of the posts were neutral or negative but there were still some positive posts:

kevmode: Gl to you in the future Jared. You are a nice guy, just block out the negative and think positive.

So, what happened to Jared after The Big Game?
After The Big Game, Jared stopped posting so much in 2+2 and he slowly faded from posters’ minds.
Shortly after The Big Game, he posted a post show reflection where he thanked the community, he spoke of how he enjoyed playing with the pros and his heartbreak after busting. He wished he had talked more and played some hands differently. He finishes with a final thought:

RelaxedPrecision: I'm happy and grateful for what this journey has been. I made some amazing friendships, saw amazing places, and had my dreams come true. I had amazing experiences, that I will never in my life forget, memories that I will always look back upon with a smile.

In 2012 he posted this post where he shared his battles with health conditions and how he still plays poker.
In 2016 he posted this in a thread about poker in developing countries. He wrote about living in China for 9 months.

Original Threads:

HU VS a drooler, lost my "roll"
**Petition to have Jared "RelaxedPrecision" Huggins for PS Big Game
**The Jared Huggins 'Big Game' Sweat Thread
Jared Huggins Big Game Trip Report-Thank You 2+2

Source
Previous post

Questions	Answers
the below question has been split into two, enumerated
Thanks for coming on here and answering our questions. I have two questions 1. Do you think aspiring writers should have to read or study other authors or their books in order to get better at their craft?	I think there's a limit to how much you can improve your writing without reading. Think of it like a compost heap: you want to be adding lots of stuff to it. Without input, your soil won't be as rich. (I have never maintained a compost heap, so, uh, my metaphor may not be literally accurate.) Or think of it like feeding a young animal so it can grow. I won't say you have to study other authors in a formal sense, though that works for some people; you just need to open yourself up to new input, rather than going around in circles in your own head forever. And that input can also come from comics/games/movies/TV, though those won't teach you the specific craft techniques of prose -- I've seen some pretty terrible writing from people who don't realize that movies and prose fiction aren't the same thing.
2. Who are some of your favorite lesser known authors?	I'm a huge fan of Dorothy Dunnett, a historical fiction writer from the 1960s and 1970s, particularly her Lymond Chronicles. She's the only writer who's ever made me feel just abjectly inferior about my own work. :-P I also highly recommend Lord Dunsany, one of the fantasists from the early 20th century, especially The King of Elfland's Daughter, and Hope Mirrlees, author of Lud-in-the-Mist. (If you've read Susanna Clark's Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell, I think of that book as "what the fantasy genre would look like if its founding text were Lud-in-the-Mist instead of Lord of the Rings.)
	Photo: I don't know why the city of Gdańsk in Poland has a place, Artus Court, which is basically a monument to the medieval period and King Arthur, but it does: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Gdansk-ArtusCourt-armor1-1024x724.jpg
So, I read the First Lady Trent book a couple of years back and absolutely loved it, because I’m a sucker for that kind of voice. Got the rest of the books on my TBR and plan to tackle them in ‘21. My question is: did you find people in the publishing world initially pushing back against the series’ distinct voice, or were they all on board for it? This is probably the number one thing I look for in any fiction I read, and I want to see more of it in fantasy, which is why LT was such a breath of fresh air.	No pushback at all! In fact, I think it was a selling point. As you say, it contributes so much to the story -- and like you, editors are often looking for that kind of distinctive voice.
	Photo: a view from the Vernal Loop trail in Yosemite National Park: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/05/Yosemite2019-VernalLoop-25.jpg
Thank you so much for answering questions and thank you even more for your books. I never know whether that’s a weird thing to do - thank an author for their work - but I can’t help myself. They mean a lot to me. I absolutely adore the Memoirs of Lady Trent. I'm an evolutionary biologist myself and reading about Isabella's passion for her field of study was such a joy! I rarely see biologists as main protagonists in fantasy and it was simply perfect. I haven’t had the time yet but I’m also very much looking forward to Driftwood, it sounds like such a great concept and I can't wait to read it. I have to admit, I mainly wanted to tell you how much I love your books. But in the end, I still came up with one (or 2?) questions. As a writer, how easy is it for you to look back at your own finished and published novels? Are they exactly as you want them to be, or are there things that you would do differently now? Or similarly, how easy is it to accept something as finished and not wanting to change it again and again? When do you decide that you’re done with a story? (Though I suspect your editorwill also have a say in that ;)).	The day I get tired of being thanked for my work is the day somebody should punch me, because I've become an insufferable git. :-)
	Some writers can't bear to look back at their own work because all they see are things they want to change and can't. I actually like doing it; sure, there are often things I would do differently now (because I should hope I've grown as a writer over the fifteen or so years I've been publishing), but I'm also capable of getting sucked into what I enjoyed about the story in the first place. That's why when I gather my short stories into ebook collections, the only changes I make are to fix typos, or to revise out offensive elements (like the use of "gypsy" in one story). The latter are the one exception to my "let it stand" rule, because that's not just about me growing as a writer; it's about not saying something hurtful if I can avoid it.
	As for deciding I'm done, heh. Yeah, when it comes to novels at least, the answer is "I'm done when my deadline arrives." :-) With short stories I have more leeway; they don't go out until I'm done with them. It's just developed instinct? If I hit a point where I can't see anything significant that needs fixing, then it's time to send it out. Otherwise I could wind up polishing the life out of i.
	Photo: it's impossible to truly capture the glory that is the interior of La Sagrada Familia and its stained glass, but this gives you one taste of the astonishing effect it has on the light: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/SagradaFamilia-interior-stainedglass-9-609x1024.jpg
Oh my god! I’m reading the tropic of serpents now. Small world 😂 I guess my question is how confident do you have to be to be a published author? I love writing, I’m doing a creative writing degree at university, but I am petrified of public speaking. Is that something you had to overcome?	Writers don't have to do public speaking, so if that part really does paralyze you with fear, you can always skip it! Me, I really enjoy reading out loud -- but it helps that I got warmed up to that by "Milk and Cookies," which is a social thing where people get together (ideally by a fire) to drink milk, eat cookies, and read stories out loud to each other. It's really lovely, and it gave me practice with public reading before I had to do that with my own work. So you might try things like that to help get you past your fear, since it can be helpful to do public readings, interviews, that sort of thing.
	There are other types of confidence you definitely need, though. Traditional publishing involves a lot of beating yourself against a wall until the wall gives up; you've got to be persistent, which means having a healthy enough dose of ego not to quit in the face of rejection.
	Good luck with your degree!
	Photo: some irises from the San Francisco Botanical Garden in Golden Gate Park: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/botanical-garden-iris-768x1024.jpg
What was the writing process like and how did u not go mentally insane from the stress u must have felt. :)	I've been publishing for over fifteen years and full-time for nearly twelve, so at this point I think I'm used to it. :-) But for Driftwood it was definitely a bit of a different game, because this book is what's called a "fix-up": it's built partially out of short stories I previously published, plus new material. So in this case I printed out teeny-tiny copies of each story and then sat on the floor rearranging them until I had a good sequence, then had to build the rest of the book around that. It's nice to get a new challenge sometimes!
	Photo: snowy egrets are beautifully elegant birds . . . most of the time: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/Gatorland-69.jpg
Hi Marie! I don’t have a question because I read through them all and everything I would have asked has already been answered. But I just want to say I love your Lady Trent books! They are amazing! I love what you do with the different types of dragons and I love the research Lady Trent does in Akhia when she learns about dragons hatching with different traits depending on how their eggs are handled. I just think that is so cool! And your dragons have inspired some of the dragons in my writing. (I’m not copying you I swear).	Thank you! You get a photo anyway, of the Rock of Cashel in Ireland. And good luck with your work! https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/HoreAbbey-Cashel2.jpg
In Voyage of The Basilisk you describe the concept of mana as a complicated system which determines social ranking. Were you inspired by any particular sources for this story element?	That comes directly from Polynesian beliefs (which are markedly different from "mana" as a spendable magic resource in fantasy games). All of Keonga is based on Polynesian cultural elements, with the exception of the "dragon-spirited" third gender.
	Photo: the island of Mokoli'i in Hawaii: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Hawaii-Mokolii-2-1024x768.jpg
the below is a reply to the above
Is the "Dragon-Spirited" not based on the Fa'afafine?	Ish, in the sense that it is likewise a third gender. But it doesn't operate in quite the same way as fa'afafine, in terms of either who falls into that category (ke'anaka'i can be assigned either male or female at birth, not just male), the expectations for their behavior, or the ideology behind the concept. It's certainly inspired by various real-world third genders, that one included, but the specifics of it are very much tailored to this specific world and story.
	Photo: Ganesha! Hanging out at Halebidu: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Halebidu-Ganesha-1024x768.jpg
the below is a reply to the above
I realized that they weren't quite one-to-one comparisons. I hadn't really given much thought to other cultures perhaps having a third gender as well. As a Samoan it was the first thing that popped in my head while reading about the "Dragon-Spirited". Seeing as how the rest of Keonga seemed to match rather well to Polynesia, it was kind of nice thinking that this aspect of our culture was also included. edit: Thank you for answering, btw! I did enjoy the whole series and look forward to your future books.	Oh, I'm sorry if that disappointed you! From my perspective it's an issue of not wanting to be all, "yeah, I totally based it on that (but then got a bunch of things wrong)!" -- since, y'know, white writers doing that sort of thing is kind of a problem. Better for me to acknowledge that something influenced the idea, but not to claim it's directly based on X. I do mean it when I say that fa'afafine were part of the inspiration for ke'anaka'i, though -- in fact, it's probable (though I can't say for sure, this many years on) that fa'afafine were the reason I decided that book was the one where I should include third gender, which had been on my mental list of "interesting things I should try to work into the story at some point."
the below question has been split into two, bulleted
I loved the Memoirs of Lady Trent a lot, the science, the world building, the story! Not to mention that Lady Trent herself is a very likable character and I want to congratulate you for creating such amazing story. I also loved the nods to real cultures and the time system (with the names for the days of the week and months). I loved "code breaking" those and I even sent you an email about those and I'm thankful that you replied to that. Now since this an AMA I have 2 questions for you: * How do you keep being motivated? I love writing and while I'm never short on ideas, I struggle to keep writing the same story and sometimes to write all together even if I know what I want to write. Do you deal with something like this?	Motivation is definitely a challenge sometimes, but how to approach it varies from person to person. For some people, deadlines are motivating; if you aren't locked into one with a publisher, maybe set one with a friend who will hold you accountable. For some people it can help to choose an external reward. For others, it's all about habit; if you make yourself write every day, then it gets easier. (Are you aware of 4thewords?) I'd experiment with different things and see what works for you. But that leads to the next question . . .
• Do you listen to music while writing or have something else on the side? I often find myself playing with a blob of modeling clay while writing and listening to music while drawing. Sounds counterproductive but doing multiple things at the same time actually helps me focus. Thank you!	I do listen to music while writing, and in fact, that's part of how I handle motivation! Quite by accident, I rediscovered the principle of Pavlovian conditioning: I'd gotten obsessed with this one song, so I listened to it while writing what eventually became my first finished novel, and after a while I realized that when I heard that song, it made me think of the story. So I regularly use a song (or these days, more often a playlist) in that way, because it's easier to hit "play" than it is to start typing, and the former winds up helping with the latter. Other people use tea, or lighting a candle, or some other small ritual they can associate with the work. Plus the mood of a playlist can help me get into the headspace of a scene, e.g. if it's dark and creepy or a battle (those being two common types of playlist I make for a book). And yeah, I find it helps me focus, by drowning out any sounds like the TV or my husband on the phone.
	Photo: my husband and I were lucky enough to be crossing the Grand Canal in Venice right at dusk, when the moon was posing near La Salute: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Venice1-LaSalute-sunset-close-1024x683.jpg
the below is a reply to the above
Thank you for your advice! I have a similar thing with music and drawing, there's a playlist I saved that no matter where I listen to it I end up sketching something. One more thing I find inspiring to me is nature, among trees I get so many interesting ideas :) Nice photo! Would you like to share some songs you listen to while writing?	I can do you one better: if you check the novel pages on my site, on the right-hand side (on desktop) or at the bottom (on mobile) most of them will have a link saying "Music," which will take you to the soundtrack (i.e. mix) I created for each book! And some of them also have links to Spotify playlists. Those are usually incomplete because a lot of the music I use isn't on Spotify, but I pull together what I can.
I'm a huge fan of yours from way back! :D What advice would you give to a writer who is having a hard time with the world at the moment, thanks to the pandemic and well... everything else?	Hoo boy. That's a tough one, in part because what works for some people won't work for others. Me, for example, one of my main coping mechanisms is to ignore as much of the news as I possibly can, because I know it will just suck me down into a cycle of anxiety and depression, without any productive result. But I have friends who cope much better if they feel like they're well-informed, and it's not knowing that freaks them out.
	But if there's anything I can say that might be universal, it's this: be kind. To yourself, and to others. We need kindness. We need consideration for others. We need to feel like we're not each in this alone; we're in it together. Find ways to help other people (safely!), to make somebody else's day a little brighter. That will also brighten your day, and the more of us who do that, the more the light will grow.
	Photo: my best sunset shot ever, from Point Lobos State Park: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/PointLobos-sunset-tree-768x1024.jpg
Besides the basics, reading and writing, what advice would you most recommend for an aspiring fantasy author?	Hobbies! There are so many random things that can feed into your writing -- Robin McKinley has a whole book that's basically about magic honey. Being able to work in some first-hand experience with painting or folk dancing or baking or gardening or whatever can add some vivid and unexpected depth to a story.
	Photo: a pretty glass bowl in Murano, Italy. I got to watch a glassblowing demonstration there, and it was awesome! https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Venice3-Murano-museum-bowl-1024x682.jpg
Hi Marie, what's your favorite non-spoilery piece of world building in The Mask of Mirrors? Or, what's a piece of world building that you really loved in one of your books, but couldn't find a way to incorporate into the story?	I kiiiiiiiinda have to brag about the pattern deck. :-D We knew we wanted our main protagonist to be essentially a tarot reader, but we didn't want the deck to be the tarot with some new names slapped on, so we (and I mean mostly me, because I was busy designing this while Alyc was busy making up numinatria, a magic system based on sacred geometry) came up with the pattern deck, which has a short introduction here. In fact, the title for The Mask of Mirrors is one of the cards from the deck, and all the chapters are titled with cards, too. But we didn't just stop at the divination: there are also two card games referenced in the story that can be played with a pattern deck -- and yes, I know what the rules for them are, and if we ever manage to crowdfund the creation of the actual deck like we hope to do, rules for both nytsa (based on koi-koi) and sixes (a form of poker) will be included as part of that. And I have rules for "pattern dice," which are a bit like cee-lo; that's basically a simple bidding dice game riffing off of the three threads (suits) of the pattern deck. There are lots of other little touches worked into the story, which I love because it makes it feel real rather than like a plot device -- like in a recent scene we wrote, one of the cards that comes up is The Laughing Crow, and a character in the scene says "Isn't that a tavern?" Because of course you'd wind up with taverns named after cards, too.
	Photo: some dice and dominoes from excavations beneath the Louvre in Paris: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Paris4-Louvre-dominoes-dice-1024x656.jpg
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I love this so much already. I really want a deck now!	We really, really hope we get to make one someday! I bought blank cards I wrote the names on, but it would be so much more awesome with art. That kind of thing is a massive undertaking, though.
Not a question, just wanted to say how much I’ve enjoyed ‘A Natural History of Dragons’. I received my copy from a Reddit Secret Santa. I finished my copy while on holiday and passed it along to a fellow lady traveler I met in Hong Kong. My hope is Lady Trent, wherever she is now, is thoroughly enjoying her new adventure somewhere around the world. Thanks again!!	Thank you! And passing along books is an excellent thing to do. :-D Photo for you anyway: the organ and rose window from St. Fin-Barre in Cork, Ireland: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/Cork2-organ-rose.jpg
Do you see Driftwood as part of a series? And, if so, do you see it as a series of short stories or will there be Driftwood novels?	In a sense Driftwood has always been a series, because it started out as short stories, which then got linked together into the book. I doubt I'll ever write a full-blown novel there, in part because I feel like that's antithetical to the setting: Driftwood is a place of fragments, not coherent wholes, and a novel is a big coherent whole. But I may very well write more short stories, plus I have a half-baked notion for a novella in the setting, so there may indeed be more in the future, even if it isn't a conventional novel.
	Photo: the old waterfront in Gdańsk, Poland: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Gdansk-Zuraw-night-1-1024x726.jpg
Hi Marie! I'd really appreciate it if you could talk a bit about your research process and approach to artistic licence specifically in relation to the Onyx Court series. It's so heavily caught up in scientific discovery and political intrigue that it seems like a difficult balance to strike between finding ways to make the story work and establishing the real world and history you're working with. Thanks for all your work and for any thoughts you have!	That's a particularly interesting case to look at because what I wound up writing was secret history: I tried to hew as close as possibly to the known facts of the past, while slipping my own additions into the cracks. So in that instance, a lot of it involved reading about the period with a constant question in my mind of "how can I use this?," which meant that "establishing the real world and history" went hand in hand with "making the story work." By far the hardest round of that was In Ashes Lie, because the history I'd decided to grapple with there was SO complex; it was much easier in the other books where real-world events weren't driving the plot quite so closely. But my approach meant I had countless instances where I discovered really cool things, then found ways to work them into the plot. It's a fun game, but also an exhausting one; it contributed heavily to my decision to set the Memoirs in a "not quite our world" setting rather than real history, so I wouldn't remain stuck in that gear.
	Photo: since we're talking about the Onyx Court, here's my favorite of the 1.7 million photos I've taken of St. Paul's: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/st-pauls-northwest-sunset-1024x768.jpg
Hi Marie! I love the conflicting legends of Last in Driftwood. I am wondering what some of your inspirations were for telling his story from multiple viewpoints.	It has to do with the order of composition for the stories. The first one I wrote was "Driftwood," which opens the book, and which alternates between Last in first person and Alsanit in third; the second one was "A Heretic by Degrees," and when I set out to write that one, I had to make a decision. Was I going to continue with that alternating structure? I decided that no, Last would be more interesting if we saw him through Qoress' eyes -- and that wound up setting the pattern for the rest of the stories, that apart from that first story (and "Smiling at the End of the World," which I originally wrote as just a flash bonus for my website), you wouldn't get Last's perspective directly. Any time you want a character to be enigmatic, it's way more interesting to view that enigma from the outside!
	Photo: kitten inna pot! From the Tsuboya pottery district in Naha, Okinawa: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Okinawa2017-Tsuboya-shops-cat.jpg
Hi Marie, What was the last place you visited pre-pandemic?	My answer to that is sadly uninteresting: Walnut Creek, a town to the east of the Bay Area that hosts the FOGcon convention. And prior to that, Boston for Christmas. I was slated to attend a convention in Toulouse in the spring, but that wound up being canceled.
	Here's a black-and-white photo I took from the base of the Eiffel Tower on my previous trip to France: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Imaginales2018-Paris-Eiffel-interior-2.jpg
Hello! Not a question, but I just wanted to say that I have been looking for a new fantasy series to read for such a long time now and no dice... however after seeing your post today I downloaded A Natural History of Dragons and so far it really is fantastic and I’m really excited to read the rest of your work. So I guess what I’m trying to say is - THANK YOU! You are awesome :)	I'm delighted that this inspired you to pick it up, and that you're enjoying it so much!
	Photo: an Oxford gargoyle! https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Oxford-University-Church-gargoyles-10-768x1024.jpg
Hi Marie! Good to see you here! Do you think you'll ever branch out into another genre? If so, what sub-genre or special section of that genre?	I definitely like the idea of not pigeonholing myself too narrowly -- that's why I'm writing everything from urban fantasy to epic fantasy to historical fantasy to (in short fiction) even some dark fantasy/horror. Probably the most likely direction to go in would be straight historical fiction, since I've already done a few short stories of that type, and it isn't too far afield from my usual work. I've got a couple of SF ideas, but wouldn't bet on them ever going anywhere. I think I'm unlikely to ever write mystery in the genre sense (though some of my plots are quasi-mysteries, like Turning Darkness Into Light or the upcoming Night Parade of a Hundred Demons), and since I find romantic plotlines more compelling when they're the B plot rather than the A plot, I doubt I'll ever write a genre romance.
	Photo: probably one of my favorite shots I've ever taken, of the Piazza San Marco in Venice at night: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Venice1-Piazza-night-tiles-1024x683.jpg
Memoirs of Lady Trent is something that has been recommend to me and other people before on here and I immediately went to buy it because it was such an interesting and refreshing concept for a fantasy novel. And driftwood looks so interesting too that I can’t wait to get a hold on it (assuming college doesn’t try to take all my time). But this is an AMA so I guess I’ll ask a question, what is your favorite color and why?	Green! For the very simple reason that when I was about ten I got contact lenses, and was offered a choice between a blue tint or a green tint. This was in the days before significant color effects from lenses; the ophthalmologist told me it was really just so I could find the lens more easily if I dropped it, and wouldn't change the color of my eyes. I chose green, and when I popped the first one in . . . my eye was EMERALD GREEN. It basically took the hints of green that are already there, and magnified them to the point where total strangers would comment on it. Green became my favorite color on the spot.
	Tragically, at this point my vision is bad enough that only a few companies make lenses in my prescription, and they don't offer tints. So my days of emerald green eyes are behind me.
	Photo: I would probably like moss even if it weren't green, but that adds. :-) And Japan does some SERIOUS moss: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Kyoto-Arashiyama-moss-3-1024x768.jpg
Sorry if this has been asked, but how much did your "past" life influence how you write fantasy and how you create your worlds? As a fan of the Lady Trent novels and the Malazan novels of Steven Erikson, it feels like there's a deeper understanding of worldbuilding for those authors with an academic knowledge of the myths and stories that inform and shape societies/civilizations.	Oh, it influenced me enormously! I mean, literally my entire Patreon is about leveraging that. (Well, it's about me going "I'd like to write a book about worldbuilding!" followed by "but I have no idea how to organize a book about worldbuilding!" followed by "huh, if I did it as a Patreon I could just write it in whatever order I like and worry about organization later" -- followed by three and a half years of me writing about worldbuilding every week. But hey, I've gotten three books out of it so far.)
	Honestly, what I say to people is that I didn't choose my majors in college by asking "what would be most useful to me as a fantasy writer?" . . . but that's more or less what I ended up with. It's absolutely integral to how I work now.
	Photo: two gorgeous medallions of Arabic calligraphy in the Hagia Sophia: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Hagia-Sophia-medallion-3-782x1024.jpg
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Well, now that I know you have a Patreon, you have a new subscriber! It's really cool to hear that it's integral - there's a bit of a difference between "knowing" and knowing, ya know?	Thank you so much!
Hi, - obligatiory first of all - I really love your works, especially the Lady Trents Memoirs Series. Despite the tons of books I've read, it remains among my top favorites. I really like the characters and one of them in particular stands out to me: Natalie. Her statements about not "liking" men, but neither "liking" women, reminded me a lot of my own thoughts I had, before finding out that it wasn't about "liking", it was sexual attraction, and I'm simply asexual. So I wanted to ask wether Natalie is asexual too, or if she's simply very introverted or something similar. (I'm sorry for being a bit late, I've been traveling for weeks and don't always have access to the internet)	No worries about being late! And yes, Natalie is ace -- but that's not a term that feels like it would fit into the period/the propriety of a Victorian lady, which is why she speaks of it merely in terms of "liking."
	Photo: a butterfly at the Cal Academy of Sciences in San Francisco. https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Academy-butterfly-4-1024x768.jpg
This is one of the best AMAs I've seen on the internet, thank you very much! I've already asked a question, but I'm really loving your pictures (you've got a great eye for framing) so I'm curious: What kind of camera do you use?	A Leica V-Lux Typ 114, and before that, a Leica V-Lux . . . 2, I think? It's actually not a system camera (i.e. interchangeable lenses -- what people usually call an SLR, though those don't actually mean the same thing), so it has distinct limitations compared to being able to swap in a macro lens or whatever. But I don't want to carry the extra weight of lenses when I travel, nor make my husband be even more patient than he already is so I can swap things out. Also, I love that these models have their screens on a full-swivel hinge, so I can do things like place the camera on the ground aiming upward and still see what the viewfinder is showing.
	Another photo! One of my favorite temizuya I've seen, at Fushimi Inari: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/FushimiInari-fox-temizuya-666x1024.jpg
With women receiving 90% of nominations in all major literary awards this year (Nebula, Hugo, etc.), how much of writing is affirmative action?	With men receiving the overwhelming majority of nominations and awards for decades on end, how much of that was sexism?
	Photo: another carving from Bath, England: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Bath-baths-museum-trio-768x1024.jpg
I LOVE your Lady Trent series! I have only one question: What was your favorite dragon to design/write about?	I think I have to give that to savannah snakes. Mostly because I based their behavior in cheetahs, and I am an unabashed cat person. :-D
	Photo: sailors climbing the rigging of the Lady Washington: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/CoosBay-trio-aloft-757x1024.jpg
I don't have a question, I just wanted to say how much I truly loved your Lady Trent series. I am an avid fantasy reader and particularly love a story with thoughtful world building. I massively look forward to reading your future books!	Thank you! A photo for you, of the Blue Mosque in Istanbul: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Blue-Mosque-1-1024x768.jpg
What's your favorite candy?	There's a chocolatier at our farmers' market who makes these little chocolate-wrapped squares of toffee and caramel -- they're amazing.
	Photo: this fellow in the Dublin Castle chapel looks like he has a headache: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/DublinCastle-chapel-head1.jpg
I listened to the Lady Trent books with my mom and she loved them. So thanks for giving us that :)	You're welcome! Credit also goes to Kate Reading -- her narration for those is amazing.
	Photo for you: a houseboat in the backwaters of Kerala: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Kerala-houseboat-1024x611.jpg
Omgosh I have nothing to ask. I just freaking LOVE your books!! 🥰	Thank you! Have a photo of a stone lion sleeping in the snow: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Krakow-TownHall-lion-snow-1-768x1024.jpg
What keyboard do you type on? And may I recommend MechanicalKeyboards	A Microsoft Sculpt. I really like the curvature and split, and the backward tilt is much better for me than the frontward tilt of most keyboards.
	Photo: San Francisco's City Hall at night, with a statue silhouetted in the foreground: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/City-Hall-night-734x1024.jpg
I just wanted to say you are wonderful. I resonate with you, your career, and entertainment choices. My undergrad is in anthropology, and will forever have portion of my heart, but when I went for my MA, I went for English literature. I haven’t done LARP but ♥️ RPG. Thank you for taking the time to answer questions. We appreciate you.	That's incredibly kind of you to say, thank you!
	Photo: candles at Montserrat: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Montserrat-SantaMaria-candles-candles-long-683x1024.jpg
I found the Lady Trent series just at the start of the pandemic and it was exactly the kind of book I needed at the time. We even read it for my book club (where it got glowing reviews). Thank you so much for an excellent series! I look forward to reading more work by you :-)	I'm so glad you enjoyed it!
	Photo: Himeji-jou, posing with cherry trees: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Japan02-287-Himejijo-1024x676.jpg
I don't have a question per se. As a conservation biologist who wishes she were a naturalist, thank you for your Lady Trent books. I've only read the first one so far but I've absolutely loved it and I am looking forward to reading the rest of the series.	Thank you! I've been giving out photos even without questions, so here's some cool moss on a fallen tree in Yosemite National Park: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/05/Yosemite2019-MariposaGrove-4.jpg
Is it too late to ask questions? Just read your blog post about finishing #2 in R&R. WAs curious how long the breaks you take between books are and how long you write per day/week (including writing for short stories).	You managed to catch me before I drifted away from Reddit again! :-)
	Breaks between books vary wildly. I had basically none this year between finishing the draft of Night Parade and the second Rook and Rose book, because my deadlines said I couldn't afford one. But when I'm writing just one book a year, I regularly have six months or so between the end of one draft and the beginning of the next -- during which time I'm doing revisions and such, of course, but for me that's a different mental burden from writing the initial draft.
	As for time per day or week, it varies even more, and I'm bad at tracking it. I usually measure my progress by wordcount rather than time, and my default is to aim for 1K a day during novel drafting. Which used to mean seven days a week, but these days it's often more irregular; I might write more like 1500-2K, then take a day off, etc. On a good day I can probably do 1K in an hour or so; on a bad day, it takes longer. Short stories tend to come out in bursts, so that it rarely takes me more than maybe 3-4 sittings to polish one off, and often less. But of course none of that factors in the time spent just kind of mulling stuff over while I'm washing the dishes or whatever. If I were a more data-driven person, I'd actually track this and know what the real numbers are!
	Photo: a statue in the Japanese tea garden in San Francisco: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/teagarden-Buddha-1024x768.jpg
[removed]	Hi! For the first of your questions, I went into that here; I'm just linking rather than re-answering because it turns out I've written more than 7K words of answers to things in this AMA, and my wrists need a break. :-)
	Historical period . . . I don't know that I would visit any period just for the sake of being there. Without attempting to claim that our modern age is perfect, historical periods generally have much worse sexism, racism, and classism, not to mention horrible diseases, food scarcity, general lack of indoor plumbing, and so forth. (I know, what a romantic answer!) BUT -- I would totally visit any number of time periods if it would let me find the answer to a question. What was {insert New Worlds society of your choice} like before European contact? How did people make {insert forgotten substance of your choice}? Who was Jack the Ripper? (I just finished reading Katherine Addison's Angel of the Crows, so that's on my mind.) I don't know what question I would most want to answer, but that would definitely be my motivation for time travel.
	Photo: the clock from the Rathaus in Basel, Switzerland: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/Basel-Munster-clock-left.jpg
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[removed]	No worries about re-asking; with over 150 comments on this AMA, I don't expect anybody to have read them all!
OH I hope I'm not too late, I've been doing for an opportunity to ask! How do the Moulish reach the island?	You are not too late! But I do not know the answer to that; they never shared that secret with me. :-)
	Photo: another Costa Rican bug, that being the place I drew on to think about life in a jungle: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Costa-Rica-insect-1024x682.jpg
If the characters lived in 2020, what would their lives be like?	From the Memoirs? Easier in some ways, harder in others. The social barriers of gender and class wouldn't be as significant, but on the other hand -- as Isabella says at one point -- back in her day, the field of dragon naturalism was so new, all you had to do was hold your hand out for new data to fall into it. At this point it would be far more advanced, and they'd have to learn a lot more before being ready to go study a much more fine-grained topic.
	Photo: a fellow chilling in his punt in Cambridge, England: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Cambridge-punter-1024x768.jpg
What is your age if that's not too personal	Since I'll probably be posting about it publicly in seventeen days, I am almost forty.
	Photo: the lake pavilion at Shikina-en in Okinawa: https://www.swantower.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Okinawa2017-Shikinaen-porch-lake.jpg