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[OC] What if every world cup team had the same population? - Group C
Hello again all, trying to distract myself from the fact that it’s already May, I’ve put my matching Friday pants and socks set on to bring you another edition of the alternative World Cup. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the premise of this series why not indulge yourself in the last two groups. Group A, Group B Whilst yesterday featured a group with sprinkles of quality throughout, I’m afraid to say this gathering is a little one-sided. One African team dwarfs three squads of an Asian persuasion, so with more utopian island spots than full time pro’s on display, I’ll try my utmost not to drift into a Thomas Cook holiday blog, no promises though. Group C West Africa Togo, Ghana, Côte d'Ivoire, Liberia, Sierra Leone, Guinea, Guinnea Bissau, Senegal, The Gambia, Mauritania, Mali, Burkina Faso, Western Sahara, Algeria, Morrocco Population (millions): 240.19 When it comes to brainchildren it’s strongly advised not to have favourites, but between you and me this is the funnest squad of the lot. Similarly to Eastern Europe, West Africa has often been a hive of sporting talent restrained by the labyrinth of borders within its confines. George Weah, Emmanuel Adebayor, Yaya Toure, Didier Drogba and Abedi Pele are some notable stars of the past, but the conveyor belt of sporadic world-class attacking talent over the last 30 years appears to have crescendoed into a full blown production line of stars in every outfield position. Something that my hypothesis can’t fairly simulate is what affect an open plan Africa would have on the decision making of some of our games Euro-Africano elite. N’Golo Kante is of Malean descent whilst fellow Parisian Paul Pogba boasts his Guinean parentage. It would be a safe bet to assume at least some juggling would take place with the region's newfound affluence, but until I am able to read the minds of millionaire athletes I’m not going to touch the subject with a barge pole, besides I think I’d go for the sort codes well before I look at their national preference. What we DO have however is a terrific squad on paper that will continue to improve as the years continue, with 17 year old Barcelona wunderkind Ansu Fati hailing from Guinea-Bissau, as long as he doesn’t succumb to a Spanish inquisition.
Goalkeepers
Birthplace
FM20
Value
Age
Edouard Mendy
SEN
Rennes
GK
Montivilliers, France
65
€4.40
28
Yassine Bounou
MAR
Sevilla
GK
Montreal, Canada
68
€10.00
29
Defenders
Faouzi Ghoulam
ALG
Napoli
LB
Saint-Priest, France
72
€17.10
29
Dakonam Djene
TOG
Getafe
CB
Dapaong
74
€26.80
28
Kalidou Koulibaly
SEN
Napoli
CB
Saint-Die, France
84
€64.30
28
Achraf Hakimi
MAR
B. Dortmund
RWB
Madrid, Spain
72
€23.30
21
Eric Bailly
CIV
Man United
CB
Bingerville
72
€31.40
26
Salif Sane
SEN
Schalke 04
CB
Lormont, France
69
€9.00
29
Serge Aurier
CIV
Tottenham
RB
Ouragahio
70
€19.90
27
Kwadwo Asamoah
GHA
Inter Milan
LWB
Accra
74
€21.10
31
Midfielders
Riyad Mahrez
ALG
Man City
RW
Sarcelles, France
77
€62.00
29
Hakim Ziyech
MAR
Ajax
CAM
Dronten, Netherlands
79
€42.80
27
Thomas Partey
GHA
Atleti
CDM
Krobo Odumase
76
€33.40
26
Naby Keita
GUI
Liverpool
CM
Conakry
78
€52.20
25
Ismaila Sarr
SEN
Watford
RW
Saint-Louis
67
€22.20
22
Pepe
CIV
Arsenal
RW
Mantes-la-Jolie, France
76
€45.60
24
Idrissa Gana Gueye
SEN
PSG
CDM
Dakar
75
€28.80
30
Amine Harit
MOR
Schalke
CAM
Pontoise, France
69
€10.07
22
Forwards
Sadio Mane
SEN
Liverpool
LF
Sedhiou
90
€92.40
28
Wilfried Zaha
CIV
Crystal Palace
CF
Abidjan
77
€59.60
27
Moussa Marega
MLI
Porto
ST
Les Ulis, France
70
€16.80
29
Islam Slimani
ALG
Monaco
ST
Algiers
68
€19.80
31
Average/Totals
74
€712.90
27.13636364
A difficult pick but I’ve settled on a squad that could play in numerous formations, Sadio Mané and Riyad Mahrez are two of the Premier Leagues most potent wide players whilst the midfield is a superfluity of athleticism and technique. The likes of Feghouli, Kessie and Gervinho didn’t survive the longlist but the competition was stiff. I’m not overly happy with the inclusion of goal starved Islam Slimani but the area is surprisingly scarce of talented out and out forwards. If this team fails to collect all nine points in this group it would be the worst thing to happen to West Africa since Di Caprio’s accent in Blood Diamond. South India & Arabian Sea 6 Indian provinces (Karnataka, Kerala, Tamil Nadu, Andhra Pradesh, Goa), Sri Lanka, Maldives Population (millions):239.70 Another region that practises footballing atheism, this was one of the most difficult to research. But if any documentarians want to make this into a series then I’d be happy to take some time out to fly out and research the Maldives for a while. The two island nations donate their services to an uninspiring mess of Indian nonentity. Including the world’s sixth highest scoring active player Ali Ashfaq, never heard of him? Nah me neither.
Goalkeepers
Birthplace
FM20
Value
Age
Kamaljit Singh
IND
Hyderabad
GK
Goa
24
€0.02
24
Chathura Ekanayake
SRI
Eagles Malé
GK
Sri Lanka
22
€0.00
27
Defenders
Anas Edathodika
IND
ATK
CB
Kerala
33
€0.03
33
Adil Khan
IND
Hyderabad
RB
Goa
32
€0.02
31
Mandar Rao Dessal
IND
Mumbai City
LB
Goa
31
€0.02
28
Lenny Ridrigues
IND
Goa
CDM
Goa
24
€0.02
32
Mohamed Imtiyas
SRI
Renown
CB
Kotahena
25
€0.01
24
Akram Abdul Ghanee
MDV
Valencia (MDV)
CB
Maafaru
28
€0.01
33
Edwin Sydney
IND
Chennaiyin
RWB
Kerala
21
€0.01
27
Asikur Alawadeen
SRI
Pelicans
CB
Kurunegala
23
€0.01
26
Midfielders
Brandon Fernandes
IND
Goa
CAM
Goa
33
€0.03
25
Rowllin Borges
IND
Mumbai City
CDM
Goa
32
€0.02
27
Sahal Abdul Samad
IND
Kerala Blasters
CM
Kerala
34
€0.04
23
Michael Soosairaj
IND
ATK
CM
Tamil Nadu
32
€0.03
25
Nikhil Poojari
IND
Hyderabad
CM
Karnataka
29
€0.02
24
Ahmed Razeek
SRI
Berliner AK
CDM
Berlin
44
€0.06
26
Mohamed Umair
MDV
Maziya
CM
Malé
27
€0.01
20
Romeo Fernandes
IND
Odisha
RM
Goa
23
€0.02
27
Forwards
Ashique Kuruniyan
IND
Bengaluru
CF
Kerala
35
€0.04
22
Jobby Justin
IND
ATK
ST
Kerala
28
€0.02
26
CK Vineeth
IND
Jamshedpur
ST
Kerala
27
€0.02
31
Ali Ashfaq
MDV
Club Green Streets
ST
Malé
27
€0.01
34
Average/Totals
29
€0.47
27.04545455
Ali Ashfaq has officially netted 463 times in his now 19 year career. Haters will say most of that was in the Maldivian league but I think I’d only be able to score half that amount so fair play to him. The most notable islander is German born Sri Lankan Ahmed Razeek, the Berliner came through the ranks at now-Bundesliga team Union Berlin, but finds himself playing fourth tier football at the time of writing. At 25, Razeek only dedicated his services to Golden Lion in 2019, a bit of European experience may help the nation who have commanded just four wins in the last five years. India’s most promising contribution to the side is 22 year old Ashique Kuruniyan, the young forward lacks goals but is known as something of a playmaker, Kuruniyan to Ashfaq could be the new Ozil to Ronaldo, but realistically I think this team will be lucky to find the net at all if the ratings are anything to Goa on. Oceania and Southeast Asia Australia, American Samoa, Cook Islands, Fiji, Kiribati, New Caledonia, New Zealand, Niue, Papua New Guinea, Samoa, Solomon Islands, Tahiti, Tonga, Tuvalu, Vanuatu, Cambodia, Singapore, Phillipines, Malaysia, 11 Indonisian Provinces (Papua, West Papua, Maluku, North Maluku, Sulawesi Island, East Nusa Tenggara, West Nusa Tenggara) Population: 231.57 I almost broke the comma button on my laptop writing out all those islands, and it still doesn’t quite reach 240m. The pacific islands are home to some of the worst national teams out there, none more infamous than American Samoa who hold the record for the biggest ever defeat in international football, a 31-0 loss to Australia. If anyone hasn’t seen the documentary that was inspired subsequently to the loss, ‘next goal wins’ is perhaps my favourite football film and couldn’t recommend it highly enough when trying to explain the humanity of playing football in this part of the world. The antagonists of the Samoan’s defeat, Australia have since changed confederations from lack of challenge. Joining the Asian Football Confederation in early 2006, the Socceroo’s have since won the Asian Cup on home soil and qualified for each of the previous four iterations of the World Cup. In 2006 a ‘golden generation’ fronted by Harry Kewell and Tim Cahill narrow missed out on a quarter final berth being beaten by eventual champions Italy in the 95th minute thanks to a controversial penalty. While the likes of Kewell, Cahill and Mark Schwarzer have long since retired, the Aussies produce a modest yet constant procession of pro’s. Along with fellow anglophone New Zealand, the select Oceanic islanders often choose a path of playing in England’s football pyramid, with a few Premier League stalwarts found within the squad below. Southeast Asia has a curious footballing culture, a strong general interest in the European game with seemingly little rewards for their appropriation, no malaysians manage to sneak into the selection whilst the Phillipines’ most famous athlete behind Manny Pacquiao only makes back up keeper.
Goalkeepers
Birthplace
Football manager
Value
Age
Matthew Ryan
AUS
Brighton
GK
Plumpton
66
€15.80
28
Neil Etheridge
PH
Cardiff
GK
London, England
64
€11.00
30
Defenders
Winston Reid
NZ
West Ham
CB
Auckland
66
€14.50
31
Milos Degenek
AUS
Red Star
CB
Knin, Croatia
62
€1.30
26
Trent Sainsbury
AUS
Maccabi Haifa
RB
Thornlie
60
€0.88
28
Bailey Wright
AUS
Bristol City
CB
Melbourne
59
€3.30
27
Wesley Lautoa
NCA
Dijon
CB
Epernay, France
62
€2.20
32
Aziz Behich
AUS
Basaksehir
LB
Melbourne
60
€2.20
29
Brad Smith
AUS
Bournemouth
LWB
Penrith
63
€9.50
26
Stephan Schrock
PHI
Cares
RB
Schweinfurt, Germany
57
€0.77
33
Midfielders
Aaron Mooy
AUS
Brighton
CM
Sydney
70
€26.70
29
Tom Rogic
AUS
Celtic
CAM
Griffith
67
€11.90
27
Mathew Leckie
AUS
Hertha Berlin
CM
Melbourne
65
€4.80
29
Robbie Kruse
AUS
Mebourne Victory
RM
Brisbane
64
€1.30
31
Awer Mabil
AUS
Mitdtjylland
RW
Kakuma, Kenya
63
€1.50
24
Craig Goodwin
AUS
Al-Wehda
LM
Adelaide
58
€4.60
28
Ryan Thomas
NZ
PSV
CDM
Te Puke
65
€6.50
25
Massimo Luongo
AUS
Sheffield W
CDM
Sydney
62
€7.80
27
Forwards
Chris Wood
NZ
Burnley
ST
Auckland
67
€23.40
28
Adam Taggart
AUS
Suwon Bluewings
ST
Perth
62
€0.84
26
Aposrolos Giannou
AUS
AEK Larnaka
ST
Nousa, Greece
63
€1.30
30
Daniel Arzani
AUS
Celtic
CF
Khorramabad, Iran
60
€8.20
21
Average/Totals
63
€160.29
29.68181818
As you can see the team is dominated by Aussie and Kiwi men, but there is some polynesian persuasion in the way of Wesley Lautoa who takes restbite trying to defend the likes of Neymar, Mbappe and Depay by bullying semi-pro strikers playing for New Caledonia. Daniel Arzani is the best bet for a future talisman, despite really struggling to make the grade in Europe he’s still only 21 and could yet fulfil his potential. The Celtic forward has impeccable technical ability and has an eye on one day becoming a regular at his parent club Man City. Chris Wood has a Premier League goal record that any striker would be proud of and is the archetypal Sean Dyche forward, but I would suggest that his physical play style precedes his genuine international quality. New Zealand famously exited the 2010 World Cup as the only side to leave undefeated, and part of that was due to the defensive talents of Winston Reid, who at that time was a 21 year old padawan learner to Blackburn hero Ryan Nelson. Now 31, The former West Ham captain Reid leads this sides defensive line where he’ll do his best to make the younger lads do most of the legwork. Neil Etheridge is unlucky not to be the standout number one in this team, the keeper come underwear model caught the eyes of English fans saving three penalties in the 2018-19 season, although when on loan to Bristol Rovers he caught a free-kick and stepped backwards into his own goal, don’t think we’ve forgotten Neil. Western China 9 Chinese Provinces (Feng Jin, Gansu, Shaanxi, Sichaun, Tibet, Xinjiang Uygur, Ningxia, Qinghai) Population (millions): 256.25 A little over the limit for this one but you wouldn’t notice from the squad. The west of China is the least densely populated region and the one with the least investment in the club game, so it is no surprise that there is correlation to the talent, or lack thereof. Every metric I’ve used in research points to this being the Chinese team that will struggle the most, the bulk of the players hail from Sichuan, which since we’re on reddit may give most of you PTSD of Rick and Morty fans standing on McDonalds counters. None of the following players featured in the most recent Chinese national squad. In a sporting wilderness that hasn’t been invited to the game of Monopoly out east, you can’t blame this side for underwhelming.
Goalkeepers
Birthplace
FM20
Value
Age
Wang QI
CHI
Shaanxi Athletic
GK
Shaanxi
35
€0.60
27
Yerjet Yerzat
CHI
Chongqing Lifan
GK
Xinjiang Uygur
36
€0.72
27
Defenders
Yang Xiaotian
CHI
Jiangsu Suning
LB
Shaanxi
40
€1.40
30
Wang Erzhuo
CHI
Shaanxi Athletic
CB
Shaanxi
28
€0.24
33
Alishat
CHI
Xinjiang Sport Lottery
CB
Xinjiang
40
€0.43
25
Zhang Ao
CHI
Xinjiang Sport Lottery
RB
Shanxi
28
€0.37
29
Liu Yu
CHI
Shanghai Shenxin
CB
Sichuan
30
€0.44
25
Zhou Xuri
CHI
Dalian Yifang
CB
Sichuan
29
€0.30
21
Otkur Hesen
CHI
Sichaun Jiuniu
LB
Xinjiang
20
€0.00
27
Bari Mamatil
CHI
Qiangdao Huanghai
RWB
Xinjiang
39
€1.50
31
Midfielders
Peng Xinli
CHI
Shanghai Shenhua
CM
Shanxi
47
€2.60
29
Mirahmetjan Muzepper
CHI
Shanghai SIPG
CAM
Xinjiang
46
€3.30
29
Zhang Xiuwei
CHI
Guangzhou E
CM
Sichuan
46
€2.70
24
Luo Senwen
CHI
Hebei China Fortune
CDM
Sichuan
44
€2.10
27
Li Yuanyi
CHI
Shenzhen
CM
SIchuan
42
€1.30
26
Zhang Chiming
CHI
Tianjin
RW
SIchuan
38
€1.10
31
Shewket Yalqun
CHI
Guangzhou E
LW
Xinjiang
33
€0.94
27
Yehya
CHI
Xinjiang Tianshan
CM
Xinjiang
24
€0.24
32
Forwards
Yan Dinghao
CHI
Gondomar
CF
Sichuan
45
€2.40
22
Li Fang
CHI
Chongqing Lifan
ST
Sichuan
34
€1.30
27
Gan Yingbo
CHI
Sichaun Longfor
CF
Sichuan
24
€0.16
35
Abduhamit Abdugheni
CHI
Jiangsu Suning
CF
Shaanxi
35
€0.75
23
Average/Totals
36
€24.89
27.59090909
Finding a 22 was a real struggle and there is an imbalance of positions to show for it. The only true striker is Chongqing’s Li Fang, who is officially listed as a striker-come-right back which is an oddly specific duology of skills. The squad is predominantly composed of players from the nations second tier CL1, which to enlight the general reader means they probably aren’t going to win the tournament. Another day another group, tomorrow we finally see one of the long anticipated Western European megasquads, and play a game of spot the Uzbekistani. Thanks again for reading, let me know if you think I've missed anyone from the squads or made an error and try to have a stab at the starting XI’s for today's teams.
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(Pt 2) Ping-Pong Picks (4-10-20) Table Tennis Betting Predictions Russia Liga Pro Moscow Sports
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