Summary: Fighting immortals is a sweetheart job for someone obsessed with the afterlife. Dying on the job, however, is cutting it too close. But Julian's curiosity with the great beyond pushes him a little too far, back to the land of the living and cursed with a damned soul, just like the immortals he's sworn to fight...
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Matti got to sit at the grown up table for this interrogation. The helicopter was too small for true privacy; cover story was that Schmidt was taking her for a routine pickup trip to Milan when he’d been made aware of a terrorist attack at the Munich Airport. He’d checked it out but the situation had gotten a tad too spicy for him and he’d had to put some distance between himself and his target location, until things blew over and it was safe to fly again.
According to Pooja, it’d have been too suspicious for them to request another eighteen seater, so instead, they crammed all the privates in the front, squeezing three in the cockpit with Schmidt. Pooja, Kyline, and Matti, meanwhile, got to crowd around Julian, who was crushed so close to Helga that he was practically on her lap.
The four held their breaths, watching Helga’s chest rise more and more with each second before her eyes blinked open, like Sleeping Beauty being kissed by Prince Charming. Except Julian, with his sweat soaked sandy hair and still slightly unfocused eyes couldn’t have been less prince-like. And instead of kissing her, he gave her a feeble wave before remembering she was his enemy, at which point he tried to cover his tracks with a fierce glare.
Matti couldn’t blame the guy too much. He was, after all, about thirty minutes recovered from being essentially bled dry.
“Ah, Mr. Julian Blake.”
“Dr.”
“Of course, my bad. Dr. Julian Blake, Ph.D. in quantum physics, yes?”
“At least I’ve earned my title. Are you actually the lady of any land? Or do you just call yourself that?”
She looked delighted at the question. “Well there is a story there. One I’d love to share. You see, I’ve never really had the opportunity to sit down across from you and make acquaintances. It’s always been straight to the furnace. And before that, what was it? Body mashed into mash and trapped in a teeny tiny container. And before that, frozen, if I’m remembering correctly. Before that it was—”
“We don’t have time for this,” Kyline snapped, her voice that spinecrushing tone, that ‘keep talking and everyone explodes’ cadence. “We have questions.”
“Well I have answers. There is a reason I wanted to speak to Dr. Blake here.” She eyed him over the way Sofia eyed a plane or helicopter, one whose model was just good enough to warrant ripping into the rest of the design. “I hear you’re immortal.”
“Who’d you hear that from?”
“Huh.” She clicked with her tongue a few times. “Direct, I like that. Well, you’ll soon come to realize that I have no incentive to lie to you, Julian, so why don’t I just answer candidly. I have followers in Omicron Headquarters, same as I had in Upsilon.”
“Those aren’t the same. You were being held in Upsilon. Omicron holds Serenity Pax.” He held eye contact but he was shaking. Now, to give Julian full credit, he was doing a good job of visibly hiding the shaking. Unfortunately, even from his poor vantage point, Matti could see the trembling because he was sitting on top of Helga and her whole body was visibly shuddering.
“It is the same because the goal is the same.” Her lip curled into a smile.
“Destroying the base?”
“Freeing an immortal.”
The helicopter fell as silent as an active helicopter can fall without actually falling. Was Helga genuinely trying to convince them that she was working with Serenity? That was actually an incredibly harrowing prospect. Of the two dozen known immortals, AngelThana had never held more than ten at once. It often took multiple attacks from the followers of the immortals to free them. However, were the immortals to work together… Were they to team up, launching organized attacks with their followers, calling shots during the combat itself.
AngelThana would never hold another immortal for longer than a few months. They’d always relied on the general apathy of the immortals, the self preservation. But if Lady Helga launched an attack to free Serenity and failed, then the next week, Archibald Wagner and his followers could launch an attack against the weakened group. If that failed, then Abraham Kebede and his followers would. A team up could mean activating the fifteen or so dormant immortal armies against a single base at a time.
Matti eyed Pooja and Kyline to see their faces, but both remained stoic, so Matti remained stoic. Even Julian made an effort but he couldn’t stop the shaking.
“What do you want with Mother Pax?” he asked.
She tutted again, before attempting to shift. “Oh do let my old legs stretch a bit. I don’t mean—” she cut Kyline a glare, “let me free. But you’re squeezing the blood out of them, sitting on me like that.”
Julian mindlessly obeyed the request, climbing off her. Matti saw the woman’s legs twitch slightly but they barely moved.
“Did you poison me already?” she asked, a heavy sigh in her voice. “You really ought not to keep doing that.”
“Makes it so that you can’t convince us to let you go,” Julian said.
Matti winced at that and was pretty sure the other two did as well. Bit much and logically nonsensical, but it wasn’t terrible.
“Well I’d suggest not doing that next time.” She ground her jaw a bit. “I have time sensitive information and these two minute bursts aren’t helping anything.”
“You won’t get more than a few minutes to talk until we land and get you secured on the ground,” Julian said. “I’m not even sure why you wanted to talk to me. You’ve said nothing except that you want to free Pax and you could have told anyone that.”
She sighed. “But I wanted to tell you, Julian. I suppose I did want a bit more privacy, since there are some things we need to discuss that the mortals simply wouldn’t understand.”
Matti expected the eyeroll here, but instead, Julian just looked intently at the woman’s eyes, as if studying himself in the reflection.
“You’ll only talk in private?” he asked.
“Mmm, you know how bored they’ll get.”
Julian looked back at Pooja, avoiding Kyline’s hard eyes. “Can we arrange that?” he asked.
“We can consider it when we arrive.”
“Ah lovely.” At this, Helga pressed her lips together in a smug little pout.
To her credit, Kyline did a good job not shouting down both of them. And also to her credit, Matti absolutely understood her outrage. Julian was probably the worst interrogator of the entire Infleurgent group. He lost his cool too easily and getting him started on some science bit was enough for his entire defense to slip. Now for sure Pooja would set up a room under the pretense of privacy, for the two immortals to talk. But if she told the honorable civie himself that this privacy was only a guise, no doubt Helga would pry it from him. So if Pooja was going to honor the request of privacy back home, she’d have to make sure Julian thought it was private too.
The question was whether the honorable Colonel would understand the importance of lying.
Julian looked back to Helga. “So you won’t say anything until we get back to Fleur? Anything?”
“I could sing you some Hungarian songs? Little white flowers will never awaken you. Not where the black coach of sorrow has taken you…” she trailed off, grinning. “Did you know tha song was Hungarian?”
“I’m not familiar with it,” Julian said.
She didn’t need to rub it in; all three mortals knew well her point. It had taken fewer than five minutes for her to weedle information from Julian, potentially devastating information. And he didn’t even know it because he was a scientist and shouldn’t have to.
“Hmm. Maybe I’ll sing more after my agonizing paralysis and suffocation.” Helga’s jaw had again grown stiff. “How close are we… to your little… base?”
Julian backed away as Pooja inspected the immortal for signs of movement. After a few seconds she ushered the group to the cockpit, kicking out Achmed, Silva, and Howard who were all doing some kind of complex three way rock, paper, scissors.
“Dunno how the four of you are gonna fit up there,” one said. “Even with the zombie and renegade being only about half person sized.”
“Hey the zombie’s been hitting the gym, you shoulda seen the size of his pecs when Tenneson took his shirt off.”
“Missed them myself,” said the medic, “but at least they were a fair sight bigger than the sniper’s.”
Matti grinned back at them. “Being small helps in my line of work. Like watch this, I bet I get to sit in Hector’s lap when he’s flying.”
This was met by a satisfactory amount of laughter and Mati followed the others into the cockpit, where he was, disappointingly, not put in Hector’s lap, but was rather put on top of Pooja while Kyline and Julian half sat on top of each other.
“No,” Kylin said, the minute Pooja opened her mouth. “He literally just outed the location of our hideout. He’s trash at interrogation and he’ll get us killed.”
“Grace—”
“I mean it. You’re not putting him in there with her, fully private, where we can’t hear what they’re saying.” Kyline’s face was fraught with emotion and Matti himself slowly prepared to move if it became necessary. Being that he sat on Pooja, he didn’t want to immediately tense up like a housecat hearing a dog’s bark, but he was ready in case Kyline decided to back up her words.
Meanwhile, Julian’s eyes tripled in size as he realized his gaff, and he pressed a fist to his mouth.
“I didn’t— Grace, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have— I didn’t even realize—”
Matti leveled him a look, warning him against further speaking. It was Pooja’s time to handle this situation.
“Blake, we aren’t angry at you.” Pooja put a hand on his knee, her voice calming his newly invigorated shudders. “This was something we knew we were risking when we let you speak to her unfiltered. We took that risk.”
“I shoulda—”
“Yes. But you didn’t and us being angry at you doesn’t fix what you did.” Then her eyes met Kyline’s. “Grace and I will discuss upon landing how to handle this situation, along with Sykes, Malone, and Cortez. That conversation will be exclusively handled by people who were officially granted elevated roles of command, which means the two of you,” she pointed and Julian and Matti, “will not be attending. There are reasons we were put in charge of managing people.”
And just like that, Matti was back at the little kids’ table. Sucked being so quickly demoted becaues of Julian’s blunder but Pooja’s deferral of action eased Kyline’s temper, almost surprisingly so. Her whole body relaxed and her eyes turned tired, almost as if her lids couldn’t keep up anymore.
“Smart. Helicopter’s not the place for this.” The Sergeant rubbed the back of her neck before massaging her temples, all tells of her being extremely stressed out. Matti understood why the tension ran through her blood more thickly than blood. As a Colonel, Pooja made calls broad and drastic enough to cause glorious success, widespread destruction, or an obscene amount of death. Usually a bit of all. She did care about the individual soldiers; her taking in Matti had demonstrated that. But Kyline felt so responsible for all of her soldiers. She didn’t need to refer to them by their first names or get to know their favorite breed of dog to immediately empathize with them.
It was that immediate empathy with soldiers that would always stop her from progressing up the ranks but General couldn't exactly be everyone’s goal. She was where she should be, fighting tooth and nail for her kids.
“Matti, gag Von Marwitz and then ensure no further contact is made with her.” Pooja fixed him with a dark stare. “We’ve learned enough troubling things from her.”
“Colonel.” He saluted and as he scrambled from the cockpit, heard the conversation turn to Helga’s harrowing claim.
The immortals working together, to free each other. The idea had been dismissed early on because after a thousand years, why would they suddenly start to work together? What could have changed?
It could be a bluff but Matti had a sinking suspicion that they were rapidly running out of time to discover a real way of killing the immortals.
—
Sofia and Harry waited at the landing pad as Hector brought them to a silky smooth landing, the kind really only he could manage.
The privates left first and from his vantage point in the chopper, Matti could see Sofia and Harry counting them aloud as they left. He saw Harry’s tongue trip on eleven before the doctor looked up to see Luli and Vikas leave the plane. A shadow crossed the man’s face and he ordered in two of his doctors at the field medic’s uring.
Then the tensions on Harry’s face melted away as his doctors wheeled a weak but still as obnoxious as ever Shanti from the helicopter. Matti had learned the man’s first name a few times but for once couldn’t get it to stick over his last name.
Finally Matti and the others were allowed to wheel the unconscious and currently near-dead Helga from the vehicle.
Sofia walked over to the five command staff and their prisoner. “Shanti says he’s immortal now.” She fixed Julian with a stern glare. “That’s not possible, right?”
“One way to find out,” Kyline said.
Julian laughed. “No, no he just got some of… or most of my blood after eating a few too much lead at the mission site.”
Sofia caught Matti’s amused grin at Julian’s attempt to sound like some grizzled war vet and the two exchanged a quiet laugh while Kyline rolled her eyes, also unable to bite back a grin. Only Hector really kept stoic, the pilot’s eyes as hard set as always.
“Alright,” he said, “let’s get her to an iso chamber and discuss what’s next. Lapinsky, keep an eye on our boy here.” He clasped a hand on Julian’s shoulder and thrust him forward towards Matti.
Sofia eyed the two men as she headed off with Hector, Pooja, and Kyline. “We’ll tell you everything when we get back.”
“No we won’t!” called Kyline.
Sofia held a finger to her lips, a movement Matti mimicked, smile still on his face.
“You think she will?” Julian asked. “I feel like such a dunce giving up that we were in Fleur.”
Matti was almost entirely sure that this meeting would end in a bugged room and Julian unaware of the true lack of privacy. All he could do now was set the stage for that.
“I think,” he started, leading Julian down the hall to their little officers’ lounge, “that you will be much better briefed before they next let you go in with Helga. They really don’t have a choice but to give her what she wants so it’ll be up to you to get useful information from her while not giving anymore away.” Julian’s face was still so stricken that Matti sighed and detoured them down towards the mess hall. “Hungry? Could use a snack.”
“Actually famished.”
“Mission’s will do that to you. Adrenaline can only keep you going so far but your body needs some nourishment.” Matti glowed at the grin on Julian’s face. The man had such a love hate relationship with actual combat. He loved feeling cool, that much was apparent, but he also had a complicated enough relationship with death that it must muddle everything more.
“Plus I lost a lot of blood.”
“Doesn’t all come back?”
Julian let out a long breath and Matti could tell he was in for quite the lecture. He put on the same listening face that he used when he’d spend hours in Sofia’s lab, listening to her rattle off about vtols in between blowing things up. The face that said ‘I am not catching 90% of what you’re saying but think you’re really smart and am enjoying listening to you lecture all the same.’
To his credit, Julian kept the lecture to a manageable ten minutes as the two men stopped at the mess hall to find any food they could scrounge up. The rules had grown lax since the rebellion, as was demonstrated by the cluster of privates lounging about on the floor with a small feast of jerky, apple sauce, toast, and some carefully rationed bars of chocolates.
“Eda! Karl!” Matti called to the injured soldiers from the ruins mission. “They catching you up on Munich?”
“Yeah. Apparently thanks to zombie boy, we gotta put up with more of Shanti’s shit,” Eda hollered back. “Thanks for that.”
“This is just standard military bs-ing, right?” Julian asked. “I thought once he got in actual danger…”
“That people would lay off and treat him nicer?” Matti laughed and coded them into the kitchen. “That’s pretty much the opposite of how it works here. But I suppose for the science folk, maybe someone almost dying would make you treat them extra nice. Seemed like the M.O. of my old classmates.”
“Did you make friends in college?” Julian asked, cracking open a can of orange soda. Since they’d gone under, Pooja smuggled back the strangest of rations. “Like, since you knew you were going into undercover spy life, I figure maybe not.”
Matti’s fingers landed on a can of soup, which he popped open and took a drink from. “No I did. I’m always trying to make friends. Only been here about a few weeks and I already got loads of ‘em.”
“Yeah, real big man on campus.” Julian grabbed a can of cold soup himself. “Unless things are different in Russia or wherever you’re from and people do go for your type.”
“Well, they thought I was an arrogant prick back then too, so not too too much has changed. But back then I was also bad at my classes. Here my ‘ego’ is deserved.” He spat out some strange, hard piece of chicken from his can. “I mean it is. And you can see how easily I slot myself into the important roles, even though if I wasn’t a renegade, I’d be the same level as Luli or Vikas.”
“Thought was just Laghardi that got you into our meetings.”
“It’s a few things. I essentially go where I think I could do something important and most times people don’t stop me. They just glare but I guess they trust my judgement cause I’m so old.” He grinned at this and finished his soup.
“You’re old?”
“For a sniper. We don’t usually last long and that makes people nervous so they just go along with where I think I’m most needed.
“And right now that’s with me?” Julian raised an eyebrow.
“Would you be surprised if I said yes?” Matti turned back to the kitchen in search of something to round off the post meeting snack. “You’re about to go in, untapped, to a room with a rather dangerous immortal. You’ll have nothing but your wits and your wisdom. So yes, I think making sure you remember what’s at stake is important. Aha!” Matti unearthed a final remaining chocolate bar. “Hope Pooja gets more.” He broke off a piece and gave it to Julian.
“I know what’s at stake. If the immortals are working together, then life as we know it could be in serious risk!” Julian popped the entire half chocolate bar in his mouth as he spoke. Rookie mistake.
“No, not the world. Them.” Matti guided him back out to the hall to point at the soldiers, who seemed to be engaging in a little foreign language exchange of their home country’s most colorful language.
“I know. They’ll die and that’s bad. But—”
“You know, this is something Kyline gets better than any of us.” Matti sighed, annoyed, as the two started back to the lounge. “Pooja, Harry, Sykes, they’ve all gotten so desensitized. I try not to be but it’s damn hard. You and Sofia, god bless her, are so stuck in this world of hypotheticals and theoreticals that you can watch your entire team of scientists go down and still not understand the cost of human life.”
Julian looked as though Matti had slapped him. “Why is it that you think I’m not taking that seriously? I literally let a medic pump my entire body dry just to save a private.”
“But why ‘just’. Why ‘just’ to save a private. What’s ‘just’ about that? You didn’t do anyone a favor.” Despite the weight of his words, Matti kept his tone even. “The problem is, Julian, you see soldiers as disposable. I don’t know how high up that goes, if you think of Pooja or Kyline as disposable, but it’s very civilian. Very ‘they signed up for this’. Yes, I know you’ve died to save them. Twice now, so I’ve heard.” The two emerged into the lounge but didn’t quite head for the couches yet. “Did anyone at Upsilon ever die when you were there?”
“Hmm?”
“Any of your soldiers. Did they die? Did you ever go to any of their services?”
Julan’s face drooped and Matti could see the answers written plainly in the way his eyes shifted from side to side.
“It’s natural,” Matti said, “to have that civilian’s apathy towards people who serve. I can’t fault you for that. It’s also natural to gain a soldier’s apathy, as you get more seasoned. But you went from having a civilian’s apathy to an immortal’s apathy. You see your death as something we should care about. You feel like a video game protagonist. You get extra bonus points for saving the soldiers on the side. Just remember that when you’re in there. Every single one of them thinks they’re the goddamned protagonist. Every single one of them thinks of Game Over as some faint thing that may someday happen. You just have more power to make that come true.”
It was hard to see if Matti’s words were really getting through to Julian and in a sense, Matti figured it may be pointless. Julian was a good man, really. He wasn’t cold or unfeeling. But he also wasn’t realizing how easy it would be for him to center this whole operation around himself. It was the lack of self awareness more than anything that Matti felt the need to highlight.
“I don’t even want to talk to her.” Julian’s voice was quiet and he turned for the couches, Matti scrambling on his heels. “It’s too much pressure. I’ll fuck something up.”
Matti hopped over the back of the couch to sit next to Julian. “Good. Feel that pressure with every word you say to her. When you realize how easy it is, a single word, the push of a button, the pull of a trigger, to completely end people, that’s when you consciously and actively need to build a respect for human life. Do not rely on the one you thought you’ve passively built your whole life. That will abandon you in moments.”
Julian looked at Matti, his shoulders still slumped. Then his eyes fell to Matti’s hands. “You’ve still got chocolate?”
Yes, Matti did, because he’d nursed it, like you’re supposed to do with rations. Grinning and rolling his eyes, Matti broke off another square and gave it to Julian.
“You also need to cultivate a respect for your chocolate.”
“Yeah.” Julian popped the whole thing in his mouth again. “At least I’ve never tricked myself into thinking I’ve developed a passive respect for dessert.”
“Well I’d imagine not. You are American.”
Then Julian’s phone vibrated. He pulled it out, eyes flashing over the message. Then he climbed to his feet, a stern look on his face.
“That was Laghardi. She wants me in interrogation bay 1. The private one. I’m going to speak to Helga again.”
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[The Beginning of the End] [Derby] - Chapter 16: Facing Down Von Marwitz

Summary: Fighting immortals is a sweetheart job for someone obsessed with the afterlife. Dying on the job, however, is cutting it too close. However, Julian's curiosity with the great beyond pushes him a little too far, back to the land of the living and cursed with a newly damned soul, just like the immortals he's sworn to fight...
First chapter --- Previous chapter here!! ---Next Chapter here!
Cover art --- Rate me on Royal Road!
Matti got to sit at the grown up table for this interrogation. The helicopter was too small for true privacy; cover story was that Schmidt was taking her for a routine pickup trip to Milan when he’d been made aware of a terrorist attack at the Munich Airport. He’d checked it out but the situation had gotten a tad too spicy for him and he’d had to put some distance between himself and his target location, until things blew over and it was safe to fly again.
According to Pooja, it’d have been too suspicious for them to request another eighteen seater, so instead, they crammed all the privates in the front, squeezing three in the cockpit with Schmidt. Pooja, Kyline, and Matti, meanwhile, got to crowd around Julian, who was crushed so close to Helga that he was practically on her lap.
The four held their breaths, watching Helga’s chest rise more and more with each second before her eyes blinked open, like Sleeping Beauty being kissed by Prince Charming. Except Julian, with his sweat soaked sandy hair and still slightly unfocused eyes couldn’t have been less prince-like. And instead of kissing her, he gave her a feeble wave before remembering she was his enemy, at which point he tried to cover his tracks with a fierce glare.
Matti couldn’t blame the guy too much. He was, after all, about thirty minutes recovered from being essentially bled dry.
“Ah, Mr. Julian Blake.”
“Dr.”
“Of course, my bad. Dr. Julian Blake, Ph.D. in quantum physics, yes?”
“At least I’ve earned my title. Are you actually the lady of any land? Or do you just call yourself that?”
She looked delighted at the question. “Well there is a story there. One I’d love to share. You see, I’ve never really had the opportunity to sit down across from you and make acquaintances. It’s always been straight to the furnace. And before that, what was it? Body mashed into mash and trapped in a teeny tiny container. And before that, frozen, if I’m remembering correctly. Before that it was—”
“We don’t have time for this,” Kyline snapped, her voice that spinecrushing tone, that ‘keep talking and everyone explodes’ cadence. “We have questions.”
“Well I have answers. There is a reason I wanted to speak to Dr. Blake here.” She eyed him over the way Sofia eyed a plane or helicopter, one whose model was just good enough to warrant ripping into the rest of the design. “I hear you’re immortal.”
“Who’d you hear that from?”
“Huh.” She clicked with her tongue a few times. “Direct, I like that. Well, you’ll soon come to realize that I have no incentive to lie to you, Julian, so why don’t I just answer candidly. I have followers in Omicron Headquarters, same as I had in Upsilon.”
“Those aren’t the same. You were being held in Upsilon. Omicron holds Serenity Pax.” He held eye contact but he was shaking. Now, to give Julian full credit, he was doing a good job of visibly hiding the shaking. Unfortunately, even from his poor vantage point, Matti could see the trembling because he was sitting on top of Helga and her whole body was visibly shuddering.
“It is the same because the goal is the same.” Her lip curled into a smile.
“Destroying the base?”
“Freeing an immortal.”
The helicopter fell as silent as an active helicopter can fall without actually falling. Was Helga genuinely trying to convince them that she was working with Serenity? That was actually an incredibly harrowing prospect. Of the two dozen known immortals, AngelThana had never held more than ten at once. It often took multiple attacks from the followers of the immortals to free them. However, were the immortals to work together… Were they to team up, launching organized attacks with their followers, calling shots during the combat itself.
AngelThana would never hold another immortal for longer than a few months. They’d always relied on the general apathy of the immortals, the self preservation. But if Lady Helga launched an attack to free Serenity and failed, then the next week, Archibald Wagner and his followers could launch an attack against the weakened group. If that failed, then Abraham Kebede and his followers would. A team up could mean activating the fifteen or so dormant immortal armies against a single base at a time.
Matti eyed Pooja and Kyline to see their faces, but both remained stoic, so Matti remained stoic. Even Julian made an effort but he couldn’t stop the shaking.
“What do you want with Mother Pax?” he asked.
She tutted again, before attempting to shift. “Oh do let my old legs stretch a bit. I don’t mean—” she cut Kyline a glare, “let me free. But you’re squeezing the blood out of them, sitting on me like that.”
Julian mindlessly obeyed the request, climbing off her. Matti saw the woman’s legs twitch slightly but they barely moved.
“Did you poison me already?” she asked, a heavy sigh in her voice. “You really ought not to keep doing that.”
“Makes it so that you can’t convince us to let you go,” Julian said.
Matti winced at that and was pretty sure the other two did as well. Bit much and logically nonsensical, but it wasn’t terrible.
“Well I’d suggest not doing that next time.” She ground her jaw a bit. “I have time sensitive information and these two minute bursts aren’t helping anything.”
“You won’t get more than a few minutes to talk until we land and get you secured on the ground,” Julian said. “I’m not even sure why you wanted to talk to me. You’ve said nothing except that you want to free Pax and you could have told anyone that.”
She sighed. “But I wanted to tell you, Julian. I suppose I did want a bit more privacy, since there are some things we need to discuss that the mortals simply wouldn’t understand.”
Matti expected the eyeroll here, but instead, Julian just looked intently at the woman’s eyes, as if studying himself in the reflection.
“You’ll only talk in private?” he asked.
“Mmm, you know how bored they’ll get.”
Julian looked back at Pooja, avoiding Kyline’s hard eyes. “Can we arrange that?” he asked.
“We can consider it when we arrive.”
“Ah lovely.” At this, Helga pressed her lips together in a smug little pout.
To her credit, Kyline did a good job not shouting down both of them. And also to her credit, Matti absolutely understood her outrage. Julian was probably the worst interrogator of the entire Infleurgent group. He lost his cool too easily and getting him started on some science bit was enough for his entire defense to slip. Now for sure Pooja would set up a room under the pretense of privacy, for the two immortals to talk. But if she told the honorable civie himself that this privacy was only a guise, no doubt Helga would pry it from him. So if Pooja was going to honor the request of privacy back home, she’d have to make sure Julian thought it was private too.
The question was whether the honorable Colonel would understand the importance of lying.
Julian looked back to Helga. “So you won’t say anything until we get back to Fleur? Anything?”
“I could sing you some Hungarian songs? Little white flowers will never awaken you. Not where the black coach of sorrow has taken you…” she trailed off, grinning. “Did you know tha song was Hungarian?”
“I’m not familiar with it,” Julian said.
She didn’t need to rub it in; all three mortals knew well her point. It had taken fewer than five minutes for her to weedle information from Julian, potentially devastating information. And he didn’t even know it because he was a scientist and shouldn’t have to.
“Hmm. Maybe I’ll sing more after my agonizing paralysis and suffocation.” Helga’s jaw had again grown stiff. “How close are we… to your little… base?”
Julian backed away as Pooja inspected the immortal for signs of movement. After a few seconds she ushered the group to the cockpit, kicking out Achmed, Silva, and Howard who were all doing some kind of complex three way rock, paper, scissors.
“Dunno how the four of you are gonna fit up there,” one said. “Even with the zombie and renegade being only about half person sized.”
“Hey the zombie’s been hitting the gym, you shoulda seen the size of his pecs when Tenneson took his shirt off.”
“Missed them myself,” said the medic, “but at least they were a fair sight bigger than the sniper’s.”
Matti grinned back at them. “Being small helps in my line of work. Like watch this, I bet I get to sit in Hector’s lap when he’s flying.”
This was met by a satisfactory amount of laughter and Mati followed the others into the cockpit, where he was, disappointingly, not put in Hector’s lap, but was rather put on top of Pooja while Kyline and Julian half sat on top of each other.
“No,” Kylin said, the minute Pooja opened her mouth. “He literally just outed the location of our hideout. He’s trash at interrogation and he’ll get us killed.”
“Grace—”
“I mean it. You’re not putting him in there with her, fully private, where we can’t hear what they’re saying.” Kyline’s face was fraught with emotion and Matti himself slowly prepared to move if it became necessary. Being that he sat on Pooja, he didn’t want to immediately tense up like a housecat hearing a dog’s bark, but he was ready in case Kyline decided to back up her words.
Meanwhile, Julian’s eyes tripled in size as he realized his gaff, and he pressed a fist to his mouth.
“I didn’t— Grace, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have— I didn’t even realize—”
Matti leveled him a look, warning him against further speaking. It was Pooja’s time to handle this situation.
“Blake, we aren’t angry at you.” Pooja put a hand on his knee, her voice calming his newly invigorated shudders. “This was something we knew we were risking when we let you speak to her unfiltered. We took that risk.”
“I shoulda—”
“Yes. But you didn’t and us being angry at you doesn’t fix what you did.” Then her eyes met Kyline’s. “Grace and I will discuss upon landing how to handle this situation, along with Sykes, Malone, and Cortez. That conversation will be exclusively handled by people who were officially granted elevated roles of command, which means the two of you,” she pointed and Julian and Matti, “will not be attending. There are reasons we were put in charge of managing people.”
And just like that, Matti was back at the little kids’ table. Sucked being so quickly demoted becaues of Julian’s blunder but Pooja’s deferral of action eased Kyline’s temper, almost surprisingly so. Her whole body relaxed and her eyes turned tired, almost as if her lids couldn’t keep up anymore.
“Smart. Helicopter’s not the place for this.” The Sergeant rubbed the back of her neck before massaging her temples, all tells of her being extremely stressed out. Matti understood why the tension ran through her blood more thickly than blood. As a Colonel, Pooja made calls broad and drastic enough to cause glorious success, widespread destruction, or an obscene amount of death. Usually a bit of all. She did care about the individual soldiers; her taking in Matti had demonstrated that. But Kyline felt so responsible for all of her soldiers. She didn’t need to refer to them by their first names or get to know their favorite breed of dog to immediately empathize with them.
It was that immediate empathy with soldiers that would always stop her from progressing up the ranks but General couldn't exactly be everyone’s goal. She was where she should be, fighting tooth and nail for her kids.
“Matti, gag Von Marwitz and then ensure no further contact is made with her.” Pooja fixed him with a dark stare. “We’ve learned enough troubling things from her.”
“Colonel.” He saluted and as he scrambled from the cockpit, heard the conversation turn to Helga’s harrowing claim.
The immortals working together, to free each other. The idea had been dismissed early on because after a thousand years, why would they suddenly start to work together? What could have changed?
It could be a bluff but Matti had a sinking suspicion that they were rapidly running out of time to discover a real way of killing the immortals.
—
Sofia and Harry waited at the landing pad as Hector brought them to a silky smooth landing, the kind really only he could manage.
The privates left first and from his vantage point in the chopper, Matti could see Sofia and Harry counting them aloud as they left. He saw Harry’s tongue trip on eleven before the doctor looked up to see Luli and Vikas leave the plane. A shadow crossed the man’s face and he ordered in two of his doctors at the field medic’s uring.
Then the tensions on Harry’s face melted away as his doctors wheeled a weak but still as obnoxious as ever Shanti from the helicopter. Matti had learned the man’s first name a few times but for once couldn’t get it to stick over his last name.
Finally Matti and the others were allowed to wheel the unconscious and currently near-dead Helga from the vehicle.
Sofia walked over to the five command staff and their prisoner. “Shanti says he’s immortal now.” She fixed Julian with a stern glare. “That’s not possible, right?”
“One way to find out,” Kyline said.
Julian laughed. “No, no he just got some of… or most of my blood after eating a few too much lead at the mission site.”
Sofia caught Matti’s amused grin at Julian’s attempt to sound like some grizzled war vet and the two exchanged a quiet laugh while Kyline rolled her eyes, also unable to bite back a grin. Only Hector really kept stoic, the pilot’s eyes as hard set as always.
“Alright,” he said, “let’s get her to an iso chamber and discuss what’s next. Lapinsky, keep an eye on our boy here.” He clasped a hand on Julian’s shoulder and thrust him forward towards Matti.
Sofia eyed the two men as she headed off with Hector, Pooja, and Kyline. “We’ll tell you everything when we get back.”
“No we won’t!” called Kyline.
Sofia held a finger to her lips, a movement Matti mimicked, smile still on his face.
“You think she will?” Julian asked. “I feel like such a dunce giving up that we were in Fleur.”
Matti was almost entirely sure that this meeting would end in a bugged room and Julian unaware of the true lack of privacy. All he could do now was set the stage for that.
“I think,” he started, leading Julian down the hall to their little officers’ lounge, “that you will be much better briefed before they next let you go in with Helga. They really don’t have a choice but to give her what she wants so it’ll be up to you to get useful information from her while not giving anymore away.” Julian’s face was still so stricken that Matti sighed and detoured them down towards the mess hall. “Hungry? Could use a snack.”
“Actually famished.”
“Mission’s will do that to you. Adrenaline can only keep you going so far but your body needs some nourishment.” Matti glowed at the grin on Julian’s face. The man had such a love hate relationship with actual combat. He loved feeling cool, that much was apparent, but he also had a complicated enough relationship with death that it must muddle everything more.
“Plus I lost a lot of blood.”
“Doesn’t all come back?”
Julian let out a long breath and Matti could tell he was in for quite the lecture. He put on the same listening face that he used when he’d spend hours in Sofia’s lab, listening to her rattle off about vtols in between blowing things up. The face that said ‘I am not catching 90% of what you’re saying but think you’re really smart and am enjoying listening to you lecture all the same.’
To his credit, Julian kept the lecture to a manageable ten minutes as the two men stopped at the mess hall to find any food they could scrounge up. The rules had grown lax since the rebellion, as was demonstrated by the cluster of privates lounging about on the floor with a small feast of jerky, apple sauce, toast, and some carefully rationed bars of chocolates.
“Eda! Karl!” Matti called to the injured soldiers from the ruins mission. “They catching you up on Munich?”
“Yeah. Apparently thanks to zombie boy, we gotta put up with more of Shanti’s shit,” Eda hollered back. “Thanks for that.”
“This is just standard military bs-ing, right?” Julian asked. “I thought once he got in actual danger…”
“That people would lay off and treat him nicer?” Matti laughed and coded them into the kitchen. “That’s pretty much the opposite of how it works here. But I suppose for the science folk, maybe someone almost dying would make you treat them extra nice. Seemed like the M.O. of my old classmates.”
“Did you make friends in college?” Julian asked, cracking open a can of orange soda. Since they’d gone under, Pooja smuggled back the strangest of rations. “Like, since you knew you were going into undercover spy life, I figure maybe not.”
Matti’s fingers landed on a can of soup, which he popped open and took a drink from. “No I did. I’m always trying to make friends. Only been here about a few weeks and I already got loads of ‘em.”
“Yeah, real big man on campus.” Julian grabbed a can of cold soup himself. “Unless things are different in Russia or wherever you’re from and people do go for your type.”
“Well, they thought I was an arrogant prick back then too, so not too too much has changed. But back then I was also bad at my classes. Here my ‘ego’ is deserved.” He spat out some strange, hard piece of chicken from his can. “I mean it is. And you can see how easily I slot myself into the important roles, even though if I wasn’t a renegade, I’d be the same level as Luli or Vikas.”
“Thought was just Laghardi that got you into our meetings.”
“It’s a few things. I essentially go where I think I could do something important and most times people don’t stop me. They just glare but I guess they trust my judgement cause I’m so old.” He grinned at this and finished his soup.
“You’re old?”
“For a sniper. We don’t usually last long and that makes people nervous so they just go along with where I think I’m most needed.
“And right now that’s with me?” Julian raised an eyebrow.
“Would you be surprised if I said yes?” Matti turned back to the kitchen in search of something to round off the post meeting snack. “You’re about to go in, untapped, to a room with a rather dangerous immortal. You’ll have nothing but your wits and your wisdom. So yes, I think making sure you remember what’s at stake is important. Aha!” Matti unearthed a final remaining chocolate bar. “Hope Pooja gets more.” He broke off a piece and gave it to Julian.
“I know what’s at stake. If the immortals are working together, then life as we know it could be in serious risk!” Julian popped the entire half chocolate bar in his mouth as he spoke. Rookie mistake.
“No, not the world. Them.” Matti guided him back out to the hall to point at the soldiers, who seemed to be engaging in a little foreign language exchange of their home country’s most colorful language.
“I know. They’ll die and that’s bad. But—”
“You know, this is something Kyline gets better than any of us.” Matti sighed, annoyed, as the two started back to the lounge. “Pooja, Harry, Sykes, they’ve all gotten so desensitized. I try not to be but it’s damn hard. You and Sofia, god bless her, are so stuck in this world of hypotheticals and theoreticals that you can watch your entire team of scientists go down and still not understand the cost of human life.”
Julian looked as though Matti had slapped him. “Why is it that you think I’m not taking that seriously? I literally let a medic pump my entire body dry just to save a private.”
“But why ‘just’. Why ‘just’ to save a private. What’s ‘just’ about that? You didn’t do anyone a favor.” Despite the weight of his words, Matti kept his tone even. “The problem is, Julian, you see soldiers as disposable. I don’t know how high up that goes, if you think of Pooja or Kyline as disposable, but it’s very civilian. Very ‘they signed up for this’. Yes, I know you’ve died to save them. Twice now, so I’ve heard.” The two emerged into the lounge but didn’t quite head for the couches yet. “Did anyone at Upsilon ever die when you were there?”
“Hmm?”
“Any of your soldiers. Did they die? Did you ever go to any of their services?”
Julan’s face drooped and Matti could see the answers written plainly in the way his eyes shifted from side to side.
“It’s natural,” Matti said, “to have that civilian’s apathy towards people who serve. I can’t fault you for that. It’s also natural to gain a soldier’s apathy, as you get more seasoned. But you went from having a civilian’s apathy to an immortal’s apathy. You see your death as something we should care about. You feel like a video game protagonist. You get extra bonus points for saving the soldiers on the side. Just remember that when you’re in there. Every single one of them thinks they’re the goddamned protagonist. Every single one of them thinks of Game Over as some faint thing that may someday happen. You just have more power to make that come true.”
It was hard to see if Matti’s words were really getting through to Julian and in a sense, Matti figured it may be pointless. Julian was a good man, really. He wasn’t cold or unfeeling. But he also wasn’t realizing how easy it would be for him to center this whole operation around himself. It was the lack of self awareness more than anything that Matti felt the need to highlight.
“I don’t even want to talk to her.” Julian’s voice was quiet and he turned for the couches, Matti scrambling on his heels. “It’s too much pressure. I’ll fuck something up.”
Matti hopped over the back of the couch to sit next to Julian. “Good. Feel that pressure with every word you say to her. When you realize how easy it is, a single word, the push of a button, the pull of a trigger, to completely end people, that’s when you consciously and actively need to build a respect for human life. Do not rely on the one you thought you’ve passively built your whole life. That will abandon you in moments.”
Julian looked at Matti, his shoulders still slumped. Then his eyes fell to Matti’s hands. “You’ve still got chocolate?”
Yes, Matti did, because he’d nursed it, like you’re supposed to do with rations. Grinning and rolling his eyes, Matti broke off another square and gave it to Julian.
“You also need to cultivate a respect for your chocolate.”
“Yeah.” Julian popped the whole thing in his mouth again. “At least I’ve never tricked myself into thinking I’ve developed a passive respect for dessert.”
“Well I’d imagine not. You are American.”
Then Julian’s phone vibrated. He pulled it out, eyes flashing over the message. Then he climbed to his feet, a stern look on his face.
“That was Laghardi. She wants me in interrogation bay 1. The private one. I’m going to speak to Helga again.”
I have a question for your consideration. Which of the characters do you feel you can picture/visualize? Which need more help? Let me know! It'll make revisions a lot better :D

Skinception- ALL PRODUCTS TO MAKE MORE MONEY- Your Commissions Just Got Bigger

EVE Beginner's Guide/FAQ: Pre-WrestleQueendom II Edition

What is EVE?

Pro Wrestling: EVE, (often just called “EVE”), is an all-female wrestling company based out of England, with a feminist, punk rock/riot grrl aesthetic and mission statement. It features many—one could even argue most—of the best independent women’s wrestlers in the world, strong long term booking, and lots of curse words.

What is EVE Wrestling like?

EVE showcases a pretty wide variety of styles, with everything from WWE “Main Event” style workers to Joshi and lucha legends to vaudevillian comedy workers. Most matches are 10-20 minutes long. Singles, tag team, and triple threat/fatal fourway matches are their most common formats, though they have a few shows per year that get pretty weird with it. Most shows run between 90 to 150 minutes and feature 6 to 8 matches. EVE’s product features more comedy matches than some promotions (usually about one or two per show), but in general all their comedy workers are strong technical workers under the gimmick, and even their comedy matches often start out silly and get more serious as they go. The diversity of styles and high average quality of their workers usually make for fun, fast-paced shows.
As far as storytelling goes, they’re great at long-form stories that are compelling yet simple enough to pick up on without having to backtrack much (the Wrestle Friends angle is probably the best example), and they’re much more likely to give the mic to a heel than a face. Everything is extremely character-driven. The booking as a whole is creative, logical, and generally excellent.

What are the rules for EVE matches?

For most matches, victories come via 3 count pinfalls or submissions.
There is theoretically a 10 count outside the ring, although generally this isn’t enforced under the “Spirit of EVE” justification; if both wrestlers are consenting to something, whether it’s out-of-the-ring (sometimes even out-of-the-venue) brawling or bringing weapons into it, it’s allowed. I can remember exactly one count out in EVE and even then the match was immediately restarted under No DQ rules.
There is a 5 count for rope breaks or general misbehavior inside the ring.
Disqualifications are possible, but uncommon. Weapons are usually discouraged, but allowed under the “Spirit of EVE” clause if both wrestlers are trying to use them. Even if they’re not, the refs are reluctant to call for a DQ and will usually just try to get rid of the weapon/yell at the heel. Most DQs in EVE are a product of run-ins, and even then they’re pretty rare.

How often do EVE shows run?

EVE usually runs 1-2 shows per month out of their home base, the Resistance Gallery in London, England. In November that number jumps up to 4 thanks to their annual SHE-1 tournament.

Who wrestles for EVE?

EVE features a mix of UK and international talent. The international talent comes from the US, Mexico, Japan, and Europe. Big non-UK names such as Manami Toyota, Aja Kong, Meiko Satomura, Mari Apache, Mercedes Martinez, Emi Sakura, and more have appeared for EVE. Several current WWE talents (Toni Storm, Paige, Nikki Cross) used to work for EVE and almost all of NXT UK’s women’s division currently does double-duty with EVE, though how sustainable that status quo is remains to be scene.
A breakdown of the EVE roster:
The Current Upper Card: These are the women currently hanging around the title picture/most likely to be matched up with visiting legends:

Kay Lee Ray– “The Hardcore Daredevil”. Super versatile Scottish babyface who’s got a hardcore rep but is also a technical wizard. She’s the current Pro Wrestling EVE Champion. Can generally be depended upon to put on the match of the night, and a legitimate “best wrestler in the world’ candidate. The upcoming WrestleQueendom 2 is her farewell show, sadly.
Nina Samuels- "The Star of the BBC". A snide diva who despises basically everyone else on the roster and especially the fans. One of the top heels in the company right now. Generates nuclear heat on the mic. Currently feuding with Jamie Hayter & Utami Hayashishita for the EVE International Championship.
Jamie Hayter- Cocky, vicious, and petty in equal measure, Jamie is the current “Ace of EVE,” which means she gets a title shot at their biggest show of the year in June; she's chosen to use that shot to go after Utami's International title. Normally the other top heel in the company, she's recently turned kinda face-by-default by feuding with Nina; whether or not that holds after Queendom remains to be seen. Employs a good mix of impact strikes and traditional technical holds/slams in her offense. Talks a lot of (often hilarious) smack during her matches, to great heel effect. Tremendous wrestler, even better heel.
Viper – “The Vixen of Violence”. “The Megaton Barbie”. Another Scot, she’s Kay Lee Ray’s best friend (together they are “The Disnae Give a Fuck Princesses”). She is challenging Kay Lee for the title at Queendom, but like Kay Lee is leaving the company after that show, unfortunately. Agile and adorable.
“Fearless” Charlie Morgan – Former Ace of EVE and former champion, Charlie is a fiery British wrestler known for her fearlessness and is usually treated as the face of the company, even when she’s not the champ. She’s currently out with an injury but is always near the top of the card when healthy. Famously came out as gay during an EVE promo.

The Serious Midcard: These are regulars who win more than they lose, but aren’t in the main event as often as the bunch listed above.

Laura Di Matteo- Italian babyface who doesn’t say much but sports a fiery technical offense and a very serious competitive streak. Probably the most likely of this bunch to move up the card soon as she has a long-running feud with Jamie Hayter. Has one of the best babyface comebacks in the business.Feuding with Jordynne Grace for Queendom.
Jordynne Grace – Mighty American power worker. Currently in a feud with Laura, who mentioned tapping her out in a promo, which Jordynne didn’t like.
Jinny- “The Fashionista”. Posh, bitchy British heel who recently returned to EVE after previously losing a “Loser Leaves EVE” match under spurious circumstances. Uses a lot of vicious knee strikes in her offense.
Kasey- Unbalanced Irish heel with a mean streak. Great bumpeseller. Good heel promo.
Millie McKenzie- “Suplex Millie”. A teenage British suplex machine and longtime babyface whose friendship with Charli Evans recently turned her heel. Together they are “The Medusa Complex.”
Charli Evans- Cocky and cruel Australian heel who recently (legitimately) bonded with Millie McKenzie, passing up a singles title shot so the two could go after the tag title.
Baynz & Nightshade- Inseparable pair of monster heels. Rarely if ever worked alone, but Baynz just retired, so Nightshade is now a singles act.
Sammii Jayne- Scottish former heel champ who had a long reign with the belt but hasn’t don’t much since. Seems to be at least considering turning babyface.
Rhia O’Reilly- “The Fighting Irish”. Multiple time former champ who can never seem to stay healthy long enough to really get back into the title picture, Rhia is nonetheless treated as the defacto leader of EVE’s babyface locker room.
Roxxy- Tough but charismatic punk rocker who seems to be the heir apparent to Toni Storm as the promotions’ badass rocker babyface. She's representing EVE in an inter-promotional match against current Wonder of Stardom champion Arisa Hoshiki of Wonder Ring Stardom at WrestleQueendom.
Alpha Female- Monstrous German heel and former champ with a Fury Road gimmick.
Yuu- Judo-focused joshi worker who recently signed with EVE. A quiet, friendly babyface who's consistently treated as a major threat in-ring.
Su Yung- "The Bloody Undead Bride" is basically EVE's Undertaker; an unstoppable undead force of nebulous evil. Undefeated so far in EVE (including a rare clean win over Charlie Morgan), she's currently feuding with the Session Moth Martina.

The Comedy Midcard: What it says on the tin; these are midcarders with primarily comedic gimmicks, though that doesn’t mean they aren’t serious threats.

"Session Moth" Martina- A hard-drinking Irish party girl and comedy babyface. Enjoys drinking, dancing, drinking, grinding, and drinking. One half of the Strong Moths alongside Heidi Katrina.
Heidi Katrina- Amazonian power-face and the other half of the Strong Moths. Hasn't really been around much lately.
Jetta - "The Mouth of the Midlands,” “Coventry’s Loudest,” “The Shit-Talk Queen,” “British Wrestling Legend,” “The Princess Diana of British Wrestling.” Mouthy inveterate cheater whose matches tend towards the vaudevillian. Recently turned babyface after years as a (hysterically funny) heel, mostly due to her relationship with Erin Angel. Together they are the Wrestle Friends.
Erin Angel- "The All-Star". Optimistic, kind-hearted veteran mega-babyface. The (Erin) angel on Jetta’s shoulder. Often annoyed by Jetta’s antics, but too good a person to give up on her. Beating up on Erin is the easiest heel heat in the company.
"The Woke Queens"- Debbie Keitel & Valkyrie. Relatively new to EVE, they're clueless, condescending comedy heels. Think a less-shrill but even more deluded version of the Iiconics.
“El Motho” and “Session Goth Martina”- The Dude Love and Cactus Jack to Martina’s Mankind, she breaks out these gimmicks occasionally. The Session Goth is the most dangerous of the three, and uses the Wombstone Piledriver as her finish. After Martina's embarrassing loss to Su Young, the Session Goth has returned to fight Su Yung at Wrestle Queendom.

The Lower Midcard: They lose more than they win, but they’re generally treated as credible.

Livvii Grace- High-energy babyface who can really sell a beating.
Bea Priestley – Sort of a discount Jamie Hayter, she does everything Jamie does just not as well. Notably a member of STARDOM’s Queen’s Quest faction and current World of Stardom Champion. Also signed to AEW, so it's unclear how much we'll be seeing of her in EVE moving forward.
Chardonnay- Bea’s buddy. Hasn’t done much yet, but with more and more Stardom talent appearing, she may soon get more to do.
Zoe Lucas- Snotty heel, she can do the splits (and will snottily inform you of that fact should your offense put her into position). Likes to kick.
Rebel Kinney/- "The Psycho Dyke," Rebel Kinney is exactly what her name implies. Grungy, violent tweener with two tongues. You read that right.
Killer Kelly- Tough-as-nails Portuguese fighter with an MMA gimmick. Losing super competitive matches to main eventers (Kay Lee Ray, Charlie Morgan, Alpha Female) is kinda her thing.
Sierra Loxton- "The Freaky Princess”. Relatively new, it’s not super clear what her whole deal is yet, beyond that she is freaky, and a princess. Recently suffered a spinal injury and will be out for the foreseeable future.
Jayla Dark- “The One Woman Girl Gang”. Big mean heel. Likes hurting people. Not a ton more to it than that.
Candy Floss- A sugar high given human form. Teenage babyface that’s an easy source of heel heat for Nina Samuels whenever she feels like beating up a little girl.
Mischa East- The only true jobber on the roster, Mischa’s a rookie who gets the living crap kicked out of her whenever she shows up.

Stardom: Coming over from Japan for both WrestleQueendom and the two shows leading up to it, these women are some of the biggest stars of the biggest joshi promotion in Japan, World Wonder Ring Stardom.

Utami Hayashishita – A STARDOM wrestler who has yet to actually appear on an EVE show, but currently carries their International Championship after defeating Viper in a cross-promotional match. Awesome power wrestler with a cocky belt-collecting gimmick.
Mayu Iwatani – The "Icon" of Stardom, Mayu is a world-class technical wrestler and rubber-limbed "bump technician." Rose to prominence as past of "Threedom" alongside now-WWE stars Kairi Sane and Io Shirai. Mayu leads Stardom's only pure babyface faction, Stars.
Arisa Hoshiki - Current Wonder of Stardom Champion, and another member of Stars. Known primarily for her vicious, kick-based offense. Will be representing Stardom against Roxxy in an inter-promotional match at Queendom.
Kagetsu\ - The leader of the villainous Oedo Tai faction (of which current Ace of EVE Jamie Hayter is also a member), basically a gang of delinquent prankster ninjas. She's a world-class wrestler (trained by Meiko Satomura), and will be facing off against longtime rival Mayu in an exhibition match at Wrestle Queendom.

Foreign Stars: Around a little less than the rest of the roster, these women are nonetheless treated as main-event caliber threats and often headline the shows they’re on.

Meiko Satomura- Joshi legend and god tier in-ring performer. Meiko is one of the best wrestlers in the world both in and out of kayfabe and almost never loses in the UK.
DASH Chisako- “The Hardcore Queen”. One of Meiko’s apprentices, DASH is an electric violence machine who came to EVE to test out Kay Lee Ray’s hardcore credentials.
Chihiro Hashimoto- Meiko’s other protégé, a world-class power wrestler who shows up a bit more often than DASH but less often than Meiko.
Emi Sakura- Another Joshi legend and a former EVE champion. Emi is a world-class technical wrestler who also injects her matches with a welcome dose of joy and enthusiasm.
Mercedes Martinez- “The Latina Sensation”. SHIMMER legend and top-shelf technical wrestler from the US. Works a punishing, grapple-heavy style. Rules pretty fucking hard.
Mary Apache – A lucha legend.
Madison Eagles- Australian wrestling legend, she’s big, strong, and super technically skilled. Trained Charli Evans.
Command Bolshoi- Recently retired Joshi legend in a clown mask. Was particularly a problem for Kasey, who suffers from a debilitating fear of clowns.
Aja Kong- God-tier Joshi legend, she came to EVE to beat the shit out of Viper.
Shotzi Blackheart- Punk as the day is long, Shotzi’s an American worker who talks about her balls a lot. Make of that what you will.

Other people who matter: Significant people not covered above.

Toni Storm- Was a solid upper-carder for years in EVE, but recently wrestled her farewell match right around the time she won NXT UK’s Women’s Championship. Probably just a coincidence, right?
Kris Wolf – “The Box Breaker”. She’s a wolf. She likes delicious meat and kicking other women in their… well, you read the nickname. Accompanied to the ring by Tito, an apparently sentient wolf-mask. Very strong worker under the gimmick, and once one of the most over babyfaces on the roster. Recently had her retirement on an EVE show.
* Addy Starr- "The All American Canadian". Spunky babyface with a hardcore pedigree. Retired in 2018.
Emily Read- One of the owners of EVE, and their ring announcer. Has an awesome pink mohawk.
Dan Read- The other owner of EVE, and one of only two male character you’re really going to see on the show. Often does commentary.
Leah Owens-Sister of Kasey, Leah’s on the shelf for a year with an ACL injury and has recently been doing a lot of commentary.
Bubba the Pug- A pug. The other male character. Is adorable.

• There are a bunch of other workers who’ve either made little impact or haven’t shown up in long enough that I didn’t cover them here. Apologies to that whole bunch, but this thing is gonna be long as it is.

What's the deal with the NXT UK stuff?

This is the million dollar question right now. A huge chunk of EVE’s roster is signed in some capacity to NXT UK (Rhea Ripley is the only female NXT UK roster member not to appear on EVE at some point). Until recently this hadn’t been much of an issue; Toni Storm was the only person we’ve seen have to stop wrestling in EVE over it (and only when she was about to win the NXT UK title), and Jinny returned on EVE’s most recent show despite being a fringe contender for Toni’s belt on NXT UK at the time. However, Kay Lee Ray and Viper are now also leaving EVE after WrestleQueendom, and it's unclear how much longer the other NXT-signed members of the roster (Nina, Jinny, Candy, Martina, Kelly, Alpha Female, and Xia Brookside) will be allowed to keep performing on EVE events. We do know there are different tiers of NXT UK deals that allow different amounts of non-WWE involvement, but we don’t know who’s on what tier or deal, nor do we know how WWE classifies EVE (i.e., whether it’s considered an affiliate, a competitor, or something else), so we can’t safely draw any big conclusions. Only WWE and EVE know the whole story, unfortunately, so we just kinda have to cross our fingers and hope for the best.

Who are the current EVE Champions?

Pro Wrestling: EVE Championship- Kay Lee Ray
Pro Wrestling: EVE International Championship- Utami Hayashishita
Pro Wrestling: EVE Tag Team Championship- Vacant, will be awarded at WrestleQueendom to the winner of the Wrestle Friends vs. Medusa Complex match.
“Ace of Eve”- Jamie Hayter
The Wild Card Contract- Effectively a “Money in the Bank” for EVE, there is no current holder. Presumably another will be awarded at WrestleQueendom.

Are there any annual tournaments or special events?

Yes, a few:

WrestleQueendom- Effectively EVE’s WrestleMania. Everything builds to this. Last year’s edition included a War Games match, a ladder match for the Wild Card Contract, two “International Dream Clashes” featuring Kay Lee Ray vs. Meiko Satomura and Aja Kong vs. Viper, and a main event title match. WrestleQueendom 2 is the coming Sunday, June 30th.
The SHE-1 Series - A three bracket round robin tournament held in November, with the winner of each bracket squaring off in a triple threat to determine “The Ace of Eve,” a title they then hold for a year regardless of wins and losses. The Ace gets a title shot of their choice at WrestleQueendom. There’s also a trophy.
Battle Bowl- Held once so far (in January),10 randomly determined tag teams face off in five tag matches, and the ten winning wrestlers then have a Royal Rumble. When the Rumble gets down to two wrestlers, it reverts to a singles match. Winner of that gets a special ring, and can pick any match they want. This year, Charli Evans won and used the pick to effectively create the Tag Team Championship by requesting a match for it at WrestleQueendom for her and new friend Millie McKenzie.

Are there EVE power rankings?

Not officially, but if you needed some:

S Level – Meiko Satomura, Aja Kong, Kay Lee Ray, Toni Storm, Viper, Emi Sakura
A Level – Charlie Morgan, Nina Samuels, Jamie Hayter, Sammii Jayne
B Level – Laura Di Matteo, Kris Wolf, Jordynne Grace, Rhia O’Reilly, Kasey
C Level – Jinny, Roxxy, Erin Angel, Jetta, Session Moth Martina
D Level – Killer Kelly, Livvii Grace, Zoe Lucas, Bea Priestley
E Level – Mischa. Just Mischa.

That doesn't cover everyone, but it gives you a general idea. These tiers are not rigid, and a given worker can generally lose to anyone one tier below them or conceivably beat anyone one tier above them.

How can I watch EVE?

A couple of their shows are currently available on YouTube (including last year’s WrestleQueendom), but for most of their stuff, EVE has their own online streaming service, EVE OnDemand. It costs $9.99 a month. For that you get:

Every new EVE show: EVE usually runs 1-2 shows per month, though during SHE-1 that number doubles, and this year at least they're running two live shows on the Friday and Saturday before WrestleQueendom.
Assorted shows from other promotions. Right now, for instance, they’ve got the first seven RISE shows and a bunch of other cool, female-focused wrestling shows.
EVE’s back catalogue. This is the real draw, as they’ve got over 80 shows available at present.

I'm new to EVE, where should I start?

Depends on how much catching up you want to do. I personally started at the beginning of 2017 and worked my way up from there. Forced to offer guidance, I’d recommend either starting with the 2017 SHE-1 tournament, WrestleQueendom, or the 2018 SHE-1 tournament, pending how much catching up you want to do, as those three shows especially make an effort to introduce viewers to many of the major players and storylines. Worth noting is that both general production quality and average match quality improve pretty dramatically over the course of 2018, so earlier stuff may be a little lo-fi.
Also, because I’m mostly ripping of Xalazi’s format and they did this for Stardom:

10 Matches to Watch on EVE OnDemand

These aren’t necessarily the best 10 matches (there’d be a lot more Kay Lee Ray and Meiko Satomura on that list), as I prioritized diversity of workers and styles over sheer snowflake count, but should give you a good idea of both the roster EVE sports and the variety it offers. That said, some of these may spoil long-run storylines so if you’re planning to start at a point before any of them, use your own discretion when deciding what’s safe to skip to. In no particular order:

Kay Lee Ray vs. Meiko Satomura, WrestleQueendom- Arguably the two best female wrestlers in the world in a technical masterclass with serious big match feel.
Jamie Hayter vs. Roxxy, Command Attention- A vicious hardcore brawl that showcases both Hayter’s smashmouth style and Roxxy’s fighting babyface routine.
Viper vs. Madison Eagles, SHE-1 2018- Two world-class power wrestlers beating the snot out of each other.
Jetta vs. Toni Storm, Slayers in Spandex- A great introduction to Jetta’s unique brand of Looney Tunes nonsense, and a fun showcase for just how versatile Toni can be.
Mercedes Martinez vs. Laura Di Matteo, Global Women Strike 2- Excellent underdog babyface vs. veteran heel match.
Charlie Morgan vs. Nina Samuels, Shevivor Series: A big, heated, main event style title fight.
Kasey Owens vs. Millie McKenzie, Bad Ass Bitches From Mars- Good sampler of both Millie’s suplexes and Kasey’s bumping.
Martina vs. Jinny, We Do Right Not Nice- Jinny’s posh condescension vs. Martina’s glorious debauchery.
Squad Goals (Rhia O’Reilly, Addy Starr, Emi Sakura, & Laura Di Matteo) vs. The Deserving (Jamie Hayter, Charli Evans, Blue Nikita, & Jayla Dark) War Games match, WrestleQueendom- Classic NWA match format that’ll introduce you to a decent chunk of the midcard.
Kay Lee Ray vs. Viper, Riot, Grrrls – Kay Lee Ray’s birthday match against her best friend, features a great mix of fun comedy nonsense up front before turning into a super competitive bout between Scotland’s two greatest wrestlers.

How can I find out what's coming up?

Following EVE on Twitter or Facebook is your best bet.

I don’t want play catch-up, what are the big storylines right now?

Heading into WrestleQueendom, I’d say these are the biggest things going on:

WrestleQueendom is a co-production with Stardom this year. As such, there's an "EVE vs. Stardom" match between Roxxy and Arisa, as well as a Stardom-only match between Kagetsu and Mayu. There's also Utami, more on her in a second.
Jamie Hayter is the Ace of EVE and has chosen to use her title shot to go after Utami's EVE International Championship. Nina Samuels has managed to insert herself into the match as well, making it a triple threat. Of note, Nina's involvement has turned the normally mega-heel Jamie into a face for the time being, but whether or not Jamie has any interest in being a "good guy" remains to be seen.
Laura Di Matteo has been calling out Jordynne Grace pretty much nonstop after tapping her out in a four-way match in late 2018. Here's a video about it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a0xF2E2WA04
Session Moth Martina has been haunted and humiliated by Su Yung, leading her to unleash her most dangerous persona, the Session Goth. They're having a "Motherfucking Deathmatch" at WrestleQueendom.
Charli Evans and Millie McKenzie have become fast friends, and are now going around wrecking everybody else’s shit as the Medusa Complex. They’re challenging for the new tag belts at WrestleQueendom, against the Wrestle Friends, whom they've been attacking and harassing for months now.
Kay Lee Ray wants to leave EVE as the champion, while her best friend (and one of the only people she hasn't beaten) Viper wants to earn the belt once before leaving. Both are gone after WrestleQueendom, so this match is largely about pride, and to some extent, the end of this era of EVE.
There are several other EVE talents being promoted for WrestleQueendom (Jinny, Yuu, the Woke Queens) who don't have an announced match yet. It's likely they'll be in this year's version of the Wild Card ladder match, but that hasn't been confirmed yet.

I have other questions!

Well I might have other answers. I’m only familiar with the last two years or so of the product but I’ll do my best. (You could also contact EVE directly, if it’s a more legitimate question).

You got something wrong/left someone out!

Ok, tell me about it. Happy to update/I could honestly use the help.

Bottom line me: Why should I watch EVE?

Is there any reason I shouldn’t? I’d say their strong suits are long-term booking, commitment to character, and versatility. The match quality is very high, especially in the last year or so, but they’re not a pure work-rate promotion in the same sense that some Joshi promotions might be. That said, Kay Lee Ray and Meiko Satomura are two of the best ten wrestlers on the planet and at least one of them is on nearly every show (usually Kay Lee). The diversity of styles is also super cool, as you get everything from strong style Joshi work to wacky comedy to Western style sports entertainment matches.
I also think EVE’s feminist mission and politics are pretty admirable, and I dig their punk rock and counter-culture aesthetics… which reminds me, their intermissions are usually burlesque or drag shows. In at least two cases, Ewok-themed burlesque drag shows.
As for downsides, if forced to pick nits I’d point out that they’re a lower budget production so there’s not some of the polish you might be accustomed to elsewhere (i.e., no video packages recapping a feud before a big match). Commentary can be a little dicey as no one involved is a trained broadcaster, but I still prefer theirs to, say, WWE’s. If you’re watching from far enough back, the match quality is less reliable, and I personally didn’t think much of Sammii Jayne’s title reign, though mileage may vary there.
Also, if you’re into forty-five minute “epics,” EVE probably isn’t the place for you. Very few of their matches go much over 20, 25 minutes and most are probably closer to 10. For me personally, though, I prefer matches that are a bit more all-killer, no-filler, and EVE serves that pretty nicely.
Overall, it’s an exceedingly well-booked promotion that puts on at least a couple great matches per show with a very cool vibe. If you’re into women’s wrestling, you should probably be into EVE.
Support your local girl gang!

Back To The Future, 9/11 and Donald Trump

Haul via TB Direct | Réalisation Kate Dress, blanknyc Jeans, Cami NYC + More

Hi, friends. I spent money, again, so here's a review of some of the items from my most recent TB Direct haul. Hope you enjoy, or find something else to add to your cart :)

My sizing notes: pretty standard US small; size 4 in Lululemon, 26 or 27 in jeans, and (relevant to an item in this haul) size small in auth Réalisation.

>>> Logistics <<<

Total cost of items: 945 CNY
Shipping cost: 193 CNY
Carrier: SF Express, by default (did not have a choice for shipping carrier)
Package weight if available: 3.043 kg (going .043 into the next tier of shipping costs was not my preferred move, but I dgaf when Direct shipping is this inexpensive, so.)
Rough order timeline: (I submitted individual orders for my items sporadically, so no estimated timeline for that), 6/07 I submit parcel for overseas delivery; 6/11 TB warehouse ships package; 6/12 customs clearance; 6/18 I receive package...
TB direct selleshopping experience rating: 8/10 -- I do prefer direct shipping for smaller, more inexpensive items like clothing, and use an agent (Superbuy) for pricier stuff/things I need to QC. I'm deducting a point because the only way my payment will work is through the app on my iPad -- AliPay seems really buggy on my computer -- slightly inconvenient when I prefer to browse and shop on my laptop. I'm deducting an additional point because, despite having no problems with past direct orders, tracking information was sparse and made it hard to figure out where my package was, even with SF Express website tracking and 17track. I wish there were an option for choosing a different carrier. Oh, well.
- (I did not have any contact with individual sellers)
NB: no PSPs included with TB direct

>>> Reviews <<<
Réalisation Par "Kate" dress in navy pansy print (size small) -- 199 CNY
w2c | my pics | auth: Tradesy -- this color is no longer on the RP website

Quality: 9.5/10 -- I've ordered from this shop before and raved about it in a finds post, including another Kate dress in a different color. Stitching and silhouette is consistent with no major quality flaws. As I'll mention in Accuracy, this dress is not silk, but it's a decent simulation of the silk crepe texture that doesn't look cheap or feel scratchy on my skin.
Accuracy: 8/10 -- unbranded, has store name tag (-1.0); a polyester blend, I think, as opposed to the auth's silk crepe (-1.0). As sheer as the auth in the unlined areas -- I tried to capture a photo so you can see for yourself, but I don't mind the sheerness. My biggest concern was this rep nailing the fitted silhouette up top, with the lower neckline -- we've got a winner.
Satisfaction: 10/10 -- super happy that this worked out for me, as Réalisation no longer sells the Kate in this print, and there don't seem to be many in circulation on resale sites. I will possibly get this hemmed a tad, as I like my dresses truly mini-length. In my awkward fit pic, you can see that the skirt hits a few inches above my knee. Petition to add this dress to the RL starter pack~*

Boutique brand (Cotton Candy) polka dot mini dress (size small) -- 80 CNY
w2c | my pics | auth

Quality: 9/10 -- rayon material, fairly soft. No major stitching or design flaws I can see. This seems like a factory reject to me because there was only one satin hanger strap inside the dress, and it was sewn onto the opposite side -- does that make sense? I just snipped it off.
Accuracy: 10/10 -- yeah, so coupled with that weird strap I had to cut off, this has tags and is definitely grey market. I actually did not realize this was going to be branded, and thought it was just an unbranded For Love and Lemons, Reformation-inspired piece.
Satisfaction: 10/10 -- I feel like Kaia Gerber in this dress, this seems like something she'd rock. This cut is super flattering but comfy. I'll be wearing it with sneakers on days where I want to look cute but am lazy. Glad I paid $12 as opposed to $60 via Shoptiques!!

blanknyc skinny jeans (2) -- collective rating
my pics (both)
1: "The Bond" distressed jeans: w2c | auth/retail (similar) | 75 CNY
2: "The Great Jones" high rise jeans: w2c | auth/retail | 85 CNY

Quality: 9/10 -- on par with mid-range denim. Not as formidable as Mother jeans, and doesn't quite flatter me like the Levis 721 ankle jeans do. I haven't worn them out yet, but I'm concerned they might get loose and not retain their shape throughout the day. To be fair, this is also how I feel auth blanknyc. Nonetheless, no glaring quality-control issues and great for the price I paid.
Accuracy: 10/10 fully branded on hardware, back tab, pockets, and everywhere else. Even fonts and finer details look identical to the auth. I feel like auth blanknyc runs smaller on me, so I went for a 27 in both pairs, like I tend to do with the auth line. The 27s fit me well, and, funny enough, I tried on that same high rise pair in Nordstrom Rack -- would be willing to bet that these are grey market, or at least fell out of the blanknyc truck.
Satisfaction: 10/10 I needed some new jeans, and was feelin' too cheap to get myself some new Levis. These fit the bill, and are damn cute. Will not be returning to Nordstrom for any more blank nyc. Also, that TB store has a ton of blanknyc, FP, and one teaspoon denim, so shop your heart out: link to store homepage.

Cami NYC Charlie velvet camisole (size small) -- 188 CNY
w2c (dead link) | my pics | auth/retail

Quality: 10/10 -- I've always been satisfied with Cami NYC's tops and this one is no exception, as the material feels nice and attention to details on the lace panels renders no stitching flaws or cut corners. I mean, I still wouldn't pay full retail price (165 USD!) lol, but it's a quality staple piece that feels made to last.
Accuracy: 10/10 -- grey market; fully branded with complete care tags, identical to retail version. Also this size (small) fits me the same.
Satisfaction: 10/10 -- even with overseas shipping, this was still cheaper from TB than it would be from an authorized retailer on sale, or the Outnet, etc. Need to hunt down more grey market Cami NYC at once.

Sézane "mon coeur" t-shirt (size medium) -- 84 CNY
w2c | my pics | auth (different graphic)

Quality: 9/10 -- surpasses the quality I'd expect from a $12 t-shirt. This is nice, soft cotton. Some stitching errors here and there. The excess thread from where the tag was sewn on was not cut, but I'll fix that.
Accuracy: 10/10 -- so I know this was part of a collaboration, but I cannot find this shirt on the Sézane website or resale platforms. Going off the stock picture that shows the Sézane model, I think this shirt looks fairly accurate, considering that there's no much to mess up with a white tee and a small graphic. I'm not sure about the tag, but no one will be looking there besides me.
Satisfaction: 10/10 -- ordered a size up for a looser fit for lounging around or throwing over my swimsuit; I have another Sézane shirt from this store and wanted something else with a pocket because I'm secretly a middle-aged dad from the suburbs lol. Works for me!

Balzac Paris "bain d'avril" t-shirt (size medium) -- 93 CNY
w2c | my pics | auth

Quality: 8.5/10 -- material feels a bit thin and "slippery" in between my fingers; the auth is 100% cotton, but I'm not so sure about this rep. Likely, a cotton and polyester blend. I'd say Zara quality. Some bizarre stitching near the collar area.
Accuracy: 8/10 -- Have not seen this out in the wild, but the color of my shirt is darker and more yellow than the auth version (-1.0) -- this is a pretty niche line, so I'm not worried about running into someone wearing the auth. Graphic print looks pretty good. Also branded with random store name (-1.0).
Satisfaction: 9/10 -- not a huge fan of the fabric, but this works for its purposes as a cute summer t-shirt I can throw on with cutoffs or wear knotted in the front with leggings.

>>> BONUS (if you're still reading this...) links to stuff I just ordered -- LMK if you want any reviews once I receive it in the mail <<<
Sophia Webster caged stilettos 299 CNY
Aquazzura wild thing block heel sandal 300 CNY
Rails flannel 89 CNY
re/done x levis jeans 235 CNY

:)

[Community] GamerGate 2018: Infinity War (We Survived the Snapture)

FOUR YEARS of magic!
2018 was an extraordinary year, as /KotakuInAction celebrated...

100,000 subscribers!

But this was also a year fraught with peril! For while GamerGate celebrated yet another triumph, a villain tried to wipe us from existence with a snap of his fingers.
And he did.
But to the shock and horror of many subreddits and gaming/clickbait news media, the unthinkable happened: WE SURVIVED.
Because we are everywhere and everything.

GamerGate 2015: No Sense Running (We're Coming for You)

GamerGate 2016: An Empire Burns

GamerGate 2017: The Year We Laughed

GamerGate 2018: Infinity War (We Survived the Snapture)

And we laugh, because not only were we spared by The Snapture, but it instead claimed a VAST number of our most belligerent detractors, companies, franchises, and e-celebs... including the snapper himself!
So let us now look back on yesteryear and appreciate those still with us, and salute all those in GamerGate rogue's gallery who crashed and burned, or faded to nothingness in the year 2018.
Pointing, laughing, and pressing F may now commence.

SNAPPED!

PEOPLE:

David-me (creator of /KotakuInAction). The snapper himself! David-me became a full-fledged #resistance fighter of the US presidency, and covertly announced on /Drama his intention to shut down this subreddit as retribution for electing LiterallyHitler. But after snapping his fingers and wiping out KiA, the admins stepped in and (thanks to this being one of the most moderated subreddits on reddit.com) restored everything back to normal. A tumultuous week followed, filled with fiery debate and heroic cat bites... but in the end, KiA stood strong and David-me was dethroned and departed. [Archive] [Link] [Link] [Link] [Link]
John "Amir0x" Goldberg (NeoGaf, anti-GG activist ) is tried, convicted, and sentenced to 2 years in prison after pleading Guilty to multiple counts of possessing child pornography. [Link] [Link] [Album]
Matt Hickey (Gizmodo, anti-GG activist ) is tried, convicted, and sentenced to 3 years in prison after pleading Guilty to multiple rape charges. “GamerGate is a bunch of women-hating future rapists!” - Matt [Link] [Link] [Album]
Jessica Price (ArenaNet, anti-GG activist) and fellow video game writer Peter Fries are fired for attacking a polite and respectful streamer on Twitter. In Jessica's case, this follows a prolonged history of personal attacks and toxic hostility on social media, and the second time she's been fired for it. [Link] [Link]
Daniel Z. Klein (Riot, Anti-GG activist) is fired after a Twitter meltdown where he viciously attacked and insulted the LoL community, gamers, and... pretty much anyone not celebrating the new PAX "No Men Allowed" policy. [Link] [Link] [Link]
Laura Hudson (The Verge, anti-GG activist) is fired along with her rabidly anti-white recruiter Devon Maloney from stalwart anti-GamerGate tech blog The Verge. Maybe she can start up Offworld again with Leigh Alexander? [Link] [Link] [Link]
Joss Whedon (Director, anti-GG activist) lost his feminist hero status and his prized Batgirl film project (which he spent years getting off the ground) following revelations he cheated with numerous "needy, aggressive" young actresses from his films and TV shows... I mean, he stepped aside to let a woman take charge because he's such a good feminist. [Link] [Album] [Album]
James Portnow (Extra Credits, anti-GG activist) gets his own #MeToo treatment and community backlash after a nasty breakup with an employee, only to be hit by even more accusations of abuse and harassment by several more Extra Credits employees. [Album] [Link] [Link]
Andrew Dobson (Inflation porn artist, anti-GG activist) has his 7yr old Twitter account permanently banned. Who knew evading your previous ban, calling for violence and repeatedly posting death threats had consequences? [Archive] [Album]
Will Wheaton (anti-GG activist) abandoned Twitter, which he deems not safe enough for vulnerable users like himself, and moved to the Mastadon Fediverse... where a week later he delivers a tearful, masturbatory farewell after it's sensitive & woke community decreed he's transphobic and demands his exile to ensure their safety. [Link] [Album]
Graham Linehan (IT Crowd, anti-GG activist) is issued an official warning by the UK police under the 1997 Protection from Harassment Act, and issued a "Prevention of Harassment" notice, warning him to cease all communication with his latest target or face the frightfully dreadful ire of British justice. [Link] [Album] [Link]
Philip "Filip" Miucin (IGN) is fired, has all his content scrubbed, and becomes an Internet pariah after a Youtuber accuses him of almost word-for-word plagiarism of their review. Then the internet uncovered another plagiarized review. And another. And another, and another, and... [Link] [Link] [Link]
Mack "John Cheese" Leighty (Cracked) is fired as Editor-In-Chief of The Modern Rogue and has all his articles on Cracked purged after being exposed for sexually preying on numerous young women at Cracked. John confesses, insists he's gone to therapy, and issues a public apology for being caught. [Link] [Album]
Jason Schreier (Kotaku) wins an award and uses the opportunity to taunt GG. So naturally Zoe Quinn jumps in and attacks him for not giving her favorable-enough coverage years ago. An enormous Twitter slapfight erupts with many familiar faces making cameo appearances, and Jason issues grovelling public & private apologies... which are rejected by everyone, leaving Jason a broken, mewling mess. [Link] [Link]
Raju Narisetti (Gizmodo Media Group CEO) is forced out by parent company Univision following a failed IPO, and "deep cuts" are advised for the proud owners of Gizmodo, Jezebel, Kotaku, etc. Following the departure of 40+ staffers, a sale of the titles is now being "explored". [Link] [Archive] [Link]
Brian Krzanich (Intel CEO), who famously reversed his company's initial response to GG Operation: Disrespectful Nod and instead partnered Intel with Feminist Frequency, resigns in disgrace after revelations he violated his company's Code of Conduct by sleeping with a subordinate employee. [Link] [Archive]
Patrick Söderlund (DICE CEO) resigns following disastrously low sales of Battlefield V after literally telling gamers not to buy the game, and calling anyone who questions the historical accuracy of pink-haired cyborg women in WW2 "uneducated". [Link] [Link] [Link] [Link] [Link] [Link]
Cliff Bleszinski (Epic Games) shuts down his game studio (to the surprise of his employees on Twitter), and denies refunds. Who knew that constantly attacking gamers would not help you sell video games? [Link] [Album]
David Jaffe (God of War) pauses on calling gamers "entitled manbabies" long enough to announce massive layoffs, and the shutdown of yet another studio. Gamers... have to be your audience? [Archive] [Link]
Talia Lavin (New Yorker Magazine Fact Checker), who claimed GamerGate was "responsible for 2 mass murders", is universally condemned and promptly resigns for inciting a Twitter mob by claiming that a para-Olympian/ICE forensic analyst sported a Nazi tattoo... which was actually a Titan2 symbol of his platoon in Afghanistan. [Link] [Link]
Matt "Fantastic" Loter (FemFreq disciple) has been identified as the man who assaulted Youtuber Jeremy Hambly at Gen Con 2018 in Anita Sarkeesian's name, and while the wheels of the lawsuit filed by The Quartering turns at a typical snail's pace, the dissociation by Quinnipiac University was swift, removing all mentions of Matt Loter and the course he was going to teach from their website. [Link] [Link] [Link]
Zoe Quinn (Goddess Mode) fails to win at the Hugo Awards for Best Science FICTION and FANTASY Works for her novel Crash Override (hmm...), and insists she's now broke... while on holiday in Japan. Backers of her latest Kickstarter are left wondering what happened to the 85K she raised to develop a Chuck Tingle game that Chuck himself insists he has nothing to do with. [Link] [Album]
Robbie Rodriguez (co-creator of Goddess Mode) all but nukes his Twitter account after sending unsolicited graphic photos of his anus to comic artist Ethan Van Sciver. The obscene photos are quickly deleted, and Robbie deletes almost all his tweets, and relabels his Twitter a "parody account". [Link] [Link]
Heather Antos (Marvel Comics) quits as editor of social justice titles at Marvel Comics to go run a gambling website following multiple comic cancellations. New Marvel E.I.C announces "fresh start." [Link] [Link]
Chuck Wendig (Star Wars author) is fired by Disney and has his books immediately cancelled mid-run for one too many obscene, vitriolic Twitter rants/meltdowns championing social justice and unleashing torrents of obscenities at Trump, GamerGate, white males, Star Wars fans, comic fans, cannibalistic humanoid underground dwellers... wait, what? [Album] [Link] [Link] [Link] [Archive]
Claire McCaskill (US Senator-D) loses her seat in the 2018 midterm elections. Was it demanding resignations for the crime of meeting with Russians, while lying about her own meeting? Or the video telling men they need to "shut the hell up" about a range of things from Star Wars to "ethics in gaming journalism"? Who knows? [Youtube] [Archive]
Brianna Wu (Revolution 60, Anti-GG activist) fails to win a seat in congress. Whether it was due to the dire warnings of weaponized moon rocks or the support from GamerGate amidst a spurious #MeToo accusation (you're welcome, Brianna!), we'll never know... [Archive] [Link] [Album]

NOTEWORTHY MENTIONS:

James Gunn (Marvel Studios) resigns after becoming king o' the world with his celebrated Guardians of the Galaxy franchise after hundreds of old child pornography jokes resurface. And the thousands of redditors who laughed and jeered at KiA when Milo Yiannopoulos resigned after a years-old offensive joke was dug up to discredit him suddenly start wailing "Can we PLEASE stop firing people for horrible things they said years ago?!" Should James ever be rehired, will his conservative counterparts be also? Place your bets. [Album] [Album] [Archive] [Link]
Ruby Rose & Scarlett Johansson are victims of an SJW harassment campaign backlash as Ruby Rose (a genderfluid lesbian) quits Twitter after being hounded for not being " gay enough" and "Jewish enough" to play the gay, Jewish Batwoman, while Scarlett is forced to quit a trans film role because in 2018 actors are only allowed to pretend to be what they already are (unless the role is a redhead). [Link] [Link] [Link] [Link]
/StarWars Head Mod and creator of the subreddit issues a proclamation decreeing that although he loves democracy, and is "the last person to want to censor anything", he is imposing a "no negative posts" rule on the subreddit. All criticism of the new films is hereby banned. The formation of a rebellion was swift, and within mere days he ~~is thrown~~ voluntarily and amicably hurls himself down a reactor shaft. [Image] [Image]
Cathy Newman (Channel 4 News) became the laughing stock of the entire Internet following her disastrously cringey interview with Jordan Peterson. Cue the claims of "GamerGate"-style harassment and abuse... which she was caught laughing at and enjoying (before deleting the evidence). [Youtube] [Youtube] [Archive] [Link]

ENTERTAINMENT:

SOLO: A Star Wars Story (2018 film) bombs so badly (despite making history!) that it effectively kills the entire Star Wars standalone film franchise, with many attributing the film's loss to irate audiences unhappy with The Last Jedi, and boycotting Solo is the only way to acquire a refund and exercise their power as consumers. [Link] [Youtube] [Youtube]
Doom (2019 film), with it's brave diverse cast and brave diverse female DoomGuy and brave open-mouthed director championing diversity, bravely announced that the movie will instead be released straight-to-video. [Album] [Link] [Link]
Star Trek: Discovery continued it's crash and burn into the atmosphere as it loses it's lead showrunners yet again... this time for chronic "leadership & operational issues", financial mismanagement, "increasingly abusive" treatment of staff, and threatening them to keep quiet to prevent filing complaints to HR. [Archive] [Archive]
Diablo Immortal has a disastrous announcement event at BlizzCon, blindsiding Blizzard staff who received boos for telling the PC enthusiast audience that the much anticipated Diablo game will be a smartphone game, with no plans to bring it to PC. What was immortalized into a viral meme was the host's utterly bewildered response: "Don't you people have phones?!", as were deleted comments from the Youtube Trailer. [Link] [Link] [MP4] [Link] [Youtube]
Where the Water Tastes Like Wine, darling of the gaming press and the ultimate anti-GG game we were forbidden to buy because it's "the antithesis" of everything GamerGate stands for... is a commercial disaster, leaving the heartbroken developers "scared" as they plan to leave San Francisco. [Link] [Link]
Border Town (DC Comics) is abruptly cancelled from DC's Vertigo lineup (where it featured alongside Zoe Quinn's Goddess Mode) after creator Eric Esquivel's past history of sexual abuse is made public. Before nuking his social media, he blamed it on The Patriarchy infusing him with toxic masculinity. [Link] [Link] [Link]
Youtube Rewind (2018) officially becomes the most disliked video in Youtube history. Rather than showcasing the stars and events of Youtube in 2018, they instead opted to showcase diversity by producing the most commercialized Rewind retrospective yet, packed with socio-political agendas, Twitch stars, Late Night TV hosts, and so much brave diversity. [Link] [Image]

COMPANIES:

BullyHunters peaks and vanishes within days as the lauded female-empowered anti-bullying initiative loses all credibility (and sponsorship) when it's revealed the "live" stream was faked, the spokeswoman was an obscenity-hurling bully, the cited statistics were falsified, and the whole thing was an ad to sell headsets. [Link] [Link] [Link]
Crash Override Network & Feminist Frequency are both quietly and surreptitiously dropped from the much lauded Twitter Trusted Safety Resource partner list and notorious Trust and Safety Council. [Link] [Link] [Archive]
Magic Mirror Comics, demonstrating how woke they are by condemning Richard C. Meyer, banning any customer interested in his comic from their store, and threatening violence against anyone who has a problem with that... shuts down due to lack of business. [Link] [Link]
Kotaku issues a grovelling apology for launching a harassment campaign against a poor woman who turned down a marriage proposal hidden as an easter egg in the Spider-Man PS4 game, after Kotaku falsely claimed she left him for his brother. [Archive] [Link]
CrunchyRoll is dumped by Funimation, and loses streaming rights to almost 300 anime franchises (and associated series). This bookends a disastrous year after coming under fire for censoring a game advertised as uncensored, unstable servers, and accusations of misappropriating subscriber funds to produce feminist diversity cartoons. [Link] [Youtube] [Link] [Youtube]
Google+ announces it's shutting down. While it's failure may be attributed to the recent massive data breach (and not it's rabid anti-GG Chief Architect), we would be remiss if we didn't give a smug salute to 4chan founder Christopher "Moot" Poole; one-time champion of free speech (before getting seduced by Gawker, subscribing to Feminist Frequency, and banning Gamergate threads) who left 4chan to save Google+. [Link] [Link] [Album]
SPLC (Southern Poverty Law Center) is ordered to apologize and pay Islamic reformist Maajid Nawaz $3.4m for naming him as an "anti-Muslim extremist" for his activities opposing jihadism and encouraging his fellow believers to embrace western values. Also apologizes to Tim Pool & co. for labelling them white supremacists, fascists, anti-semites and/or Russia conspirators. [Link] [Archive]
Tumblr Fandoms recoil in horror as Tumblr implements a "no porn" rule, shutting down all adult content on their platform. The LGBT community despair as what was considered the most queer-friendly social media board starts banning them en masse for anything and everything, prompting an exodus not seen since 4chan banned Gamergate. [Link] [Archive] (nsfw)

COMMUNITIES:

#SaveGawker (Kickstarter campaign) tried and failed, barely raising 15% of the funds necessary needed for a collective of former employees to "save" it at auction, with the property ultimately falling into ownership by a former Gawker hitpiece target. [Link] [Image]
AntiFa terrorists violently storm a free speech forum featuring Sargon. After standing his ground, they're sent running and Sargon claims their flag and holds it up in triumph as a trophy. [Link] [Link] [Image]
The LGBTQ+ Society (of Goldsmiths University) is denounced, disassociated and disbanded from the campus and student union for insisting that communist gulags have been historically misunderstood. In fact, those sent there learned new skills via "classes, book clubs, newspaper editorial teams, sports, theatre & performance groups", and modern-day gulags aren't an idea we should discount so quickly, so bigots (like you) can be eradicated... through re-education. [Archive] [Link]
Twitch Thots (to use the Internet vernacular) cried out in their hundreds as numerous social media accounts shut down after those wacky rascals on /pol/ started reporting Snapchat Premium (ie. porn for sale) users to the IRS for tax evasion. It was extraordinary, watching those who for years smugly proclaimed "Sex work is real work, Trump's gonna pay his fair share lol!" flip overnight to wailing "Why am I being audited? It wasn't work income; they were gifts! Taxation is theft!" [Link] [Youtube]

IN MEMORIUM

TotalBiscuit passed away in 2018. While many felt a personal sting after he publically turned on KotakuInAction (and pretty much everybody) in his final months, we fondly remember the years he proudly stood by GamerGate. Be to his virtues very kind Be to his faults a little blind [Link] [Link] [Mp4]
Gator (1976) passed away in 2018. All he wanted was to be left alone to enjoy his hobbies at home with his daughter, but fate had other ideas. And so Gator was forced to go out and bring down the corrupt and crooked people rigging the industry who just wouldn't let him and his daughter live in peace, leaving a trail of destruction in his wake. We salute you, Gator. May you be immortalized in the KiA sidebar. [Image] [Youtube] [Link]

SPARED:

/KotakuInAction celebrates 100,000 subscribers! For a consumer movement pronounced dead in 2014, we continue to grow in size and influence. From getting US presidents elected to turning the whole world against the mainstream news media to weaponizing eggplant emojis, GamerGate continues to be responsible for literally everything. [Link]
OneAngryGamer is a regular target for DDOS attacks, but this year the hackers succeeded in bringing the gaming news site down... and corrupting the backups! For the better part of a month, OAG was offline with no ETA on it's return (if ever). But surprise; it's back, and once again making feminists quake at the sight of it's sidebar ads for anime tiddy statues. Just remember, kiddies: Archive Everything. TWICE. [Link] [Link] [Link]
Xenoblade Chronicles 2 becomes the best selling game in the franchise, shipping over a million units across the world. All despite dire warnings by gaming news and woke forums who insisted the game was "too Japanese", and the shapely, feminine girls had visible lumps on their chest that don't belong in western releases. [Link] [Link] [Album]
Kingdom Come: Deliverence overcomes industry-wide blacklisting, hit pieces, and agenda-driven reviews, and succeeds in achieving every SJW game dev's ultimate dream: record-breaking sales, widespread praise and acclaim, and most importantly... being used as a teaching tool in schools! [Album] [Link] [Link] [Link] [Archive]
Hulk Hogan, GamerGate's iconic tag-team partner in body-slamming Gawker into bankruptcy and oblivion is once more reinstated into the WWE Hall of Fame. #BringBackBullying: FAILED. #BringBackHulkamania: SUCCESS. [Link] [Album] [Youtube]
Soe Gschwind-Penski (eSports announcer) uses International Women's Day to thank all the men in gaming who treated her with respect and as an equal, whom offered her nothing but support, assistance, and positive reinforcement in a triumph for female equality in gaming. She promptly received hundreds of hate mail, hot takes, and death threats from feminists for her "internalized misogyny"... yet she neither retreated nor apologized, and stood strong for true equality in gaming. [Link] [Archive]
#WeStand4Flood. Five "Mean Girls" falsely accused a boy at school of sexual assault in 2017 because they "just didn't like him". He was shackled, charged, and despite desperately pleading Not Guilty sentenced to juvenile detention. In 2018, the Mean Girls confessed and he returned to school, whereupon he was bullied and terrorized as a sex offender while the girls received no punishment. But good news, everyone! The family is suing the girl's parents, the school, and the County DA who didn't dismiss the case for months after the confessions. Thanks to overwhelming local outcry and global exposure, justice is finally being done! [Link] [Album]
Freedom X won a $122,000 lawsuit against University of Washington, who can no longer charge ludicrously expensive "security" fees when conservative speakers wished to hold speaking events. The university agreed to end charging security fees entirely, ensuring conservative speakers are no longer "dissuaded" from appearing. [Link] [Link]
ComicsGate continues to surpass all obstacles, from breaking the GoFundme goal and raising $400,000, to raising $120,000 to take vitriolic writer Mark Waid to court for tortious interference. The wheels of justice turn slow as ever, but we've stockpiled popcorn and are ready to watch the show. [Link] [Link] [Link]
BBC Comedy proved that the world still has a licence to laugh at Social Justice Warriors with the hilarious skit "When You So Woke, You Asleep." With over 20,000 retweets and nearly 40,000 Likes, legendary entertainer Tracey Ullman perfectly skewers the modern affliction of "wokeness" to the delight of all. [Link] [Link] [Link]

WHAT A YEAR!
Sorry for not posting this earlier, but the truth is... I've been busy playing vidya!
Well, that and we're barely into 2019 and it seems every ~~week~~ day there is a MAJOR HAPPENING on reddit:

Government shutdowns, while Buzzfeed tricks the world with fake "We got him!" stories...
...TWICE.
The Covington School saga inciting a global news media/Hollywood witch hunt over weaponized smirks...
Gillette getting everyone in a frothy lather over masculinity...
GG's most notorious clickbait media adversaries (Buzzfeed, HuffPo, Vice, etc) got scythed, announcing thousands of layoffs as the clickbait bubble finally bursts to wails of despair as #LearnToCode becomes the latest meme banned for domestic terrorism...

And that was only the first month! And it's only February and the media is copping yet another shellacking over the way journalists and celebrities climbed over each other to condemn their ideological enemies over the Jussie Smollett attack... which turned out to be an orchestrated hoax. Yikes! The planet keeps spinning on it's axis and never slowing down!

But I managed to pause the rollercoaster of life just long enough to type this all up, so I hope you enjoyed this little retrospective! I have no doubt that after clicking the SUBMIT button, there will be some other major breaking story (or I realize I forgot to include some major 2018 event, or missed some dumb typo).
But whatever it may be... it's all GamerGate's fault. Because GG continues to be the runaway train that just won't stop; the bogeyman responsible for everything, everywhere!
2018's major pop culture event was The Infinity War, and we at /KotakuInAction all watched awestruck as so, so many anti-GG preachers and SocJus activists got utterly snapped. And we're still here!

So HAPPY NEW YEAR, a fond farewell to all those taken by The Snapture, and say a prayer alongside the girl with the Infinity Ribbon in her hair for an amazing 2019!

2018 /VIDYA/ Retrospective
(03:57s)
(Can you spot Vivian?)

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The Beginning of the End --- Chapter 16: Facing Down Von Marwitz