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Best Prime Day Deals Reddit
Amazon Prime Day Deals 2020 Reddit , Amazon’s yearly deals bonanza for Prime members, is almost here, and it’s not too early to start pulling together your wish list. Last year’s mid-July event yielded some of the best prices we saw during all of 2019, and we expect to see the same quality of deals this year on October 13 and 14. Here’s a quick preview of the early deals we’ve found and a primer (see what we did there?) on what you can expect during Prime Day 2020.The best early Prime Day deals As Amazon’s deals bonanza draws closer, we’ve already begun to see some pre–Prime Day deals crop up on the site. Some of these early Prime Day deals have already come and gone, but don’t worry: Those that have disappeared will likely be back in time for Prime Day looking just as good or even better. Until then, here are the best early discounts we’ve spotted so far. More details here https://techbylight.com/best-tech-deals-today/ Amazon device deals Kindle Paperwhite deals After rounds of diligent testing, our guide writers have come to the conclusion that the Kindle Paperwhite is the best ebook reader money can buy—and, luckily for avid readers, we fully expect the Paperwhite to drop to $85 or less during Prime Day. Right now, we’ve found a bundled Pre-Prime Day deal that includes the Paperwhite, an Amazon leather cover, and a power adapter for $120. However, we don’t think this deal is that great, considering the case isn’t a Techbylight pick and most people will find the extra USB wall charger extraneous. Audible 1-Year Subscription Deal price: $100; street price: $150 Kindle Unlimited (6 Months) Deal price: $30; street price: $60 Amazon Echo Show 5 and Echo Show 8 Deals Both the Amazon Echo Show 5 and the Echo Show 8 are Techbylight-approved smart displays that can serve many functions—they can act as alarm clocks, kitchen sous chefs, a way to spend time with your family virtually. We expect to see good deals on both the Show 8 and the Show 5 (which is just a smaller version of the 8) this Prime Day, and the Show 5 is actually on sale right now for $45 in a pre-Prime Day deal. For an extra $5, Prime members can also add the Blink Mini indoor security camera to their carts as part of that same promotion. Amazon Echo Show 5 Smart Display Deal price: $45; street price: $75 Read our review of the best smart display for Amazon Alexa and Google Assistant. Amazon Echo Dot Deals The Echo Dot is the perfect choice for a beginner looking to dip their toe into the world of smart speakers. Affordable and compact, the Echo Dot gives you a surprisingly good sound for something so small, along with all the control and features of Alexa; for folks already entrenched in the Alexa ecosystem, adding another Echo Dot to another part of your home can extend your smart assistants’ range. We’ve already seen the price of the Echo Dot drop in the run up to Prime Day 2020—we found an exclusive Prime member deal that brought a two-pack of Dots down to $40. Unfortunately, that deal has already expired, but we’ll likely see the price of Dot drop again during Prime Day proper. Amazon Music Unlimited 4 Months for $1 Deal price: $1; street price: $32 For details https://techbylight.com/best-tech-deals-today/ Echo Auto Deals The Echo Auto is a way to add Alexa to your vehicle. Available for $20 as part of a pre-Prime Day promotion, it claims to allow you to use your voice to play music, check the news, make calls, add to your to-do list, or manage your calendar. We don't recommend the Echo Auto, as per Techbylight Senior Editor Grant Clauser: "It's an interesting concept, and is nice when it works, but it frequently doesn't." Blink Mini Indoor Camera The Blink Mini is Amazon’s new security camera, and, as part of a Pre-Prime Day deal, can be added on to an Echo Show 5 purchase for $5 extra. Compact and light, this small indoor security camera (which sells for $25 on its own) claims to offer motion detection, night vision, and Alexa capabilities. Techbylight does not recommend the Blink Mini for a few reasons, the biggest being its tendency to overlook motion along with its recording limitations. “It missed some events completely during testing and limits recordings to 30 seconds, with 10-second gaps in between captured clips,” says smart home senior staff writer Rachel Cericola. “And while that may not seem like a lot, it means every time there’s 90 seconds of movement, you’re missing a third of that.” Blink Minis purchased now come with a free trial of the Blink cloud storage subscription through the end of December 2020—but once the year is over, you’ll be required to subscribe to the monthly service if you want the camera to make and save recordings, and Rachel says there are far better options for that (which we recommend!). Kitchen deals We’ll see deals on small kitchen appliances, including favorites from OXO and Instant Pot. Historically, the Instant Pot has been one of the star deals of Prime Day—we’ve seen deals that have taken it to as much as 50% off. Expect to see deals on coffee makers, as well, with our top pick, the OXO Brew 9 Cup Coffee Maker, likely to be well discounted. One caveat: Small kitchen appliance deals are trickier this year than on previous Prime Days, as the coronavirus pandemic has driven tremendous demand for some sought-after products and brands. Since March, for example, we haven’t seen the KitchenAid stand mixer deals we usually see with some regularity, and that’s largely true of our best blender picks, as well. All-Clad D3 Stainless 12″ Fry Pan with Lid Deal price: $100; street price: $125 Read our review of the best skillet. For Details https://kitchenkm.com/best-nonstick-skillet/ OXO Good Grips Spiralizer Deal price: $32; street price: $40 (use code FALL) Read our review of the best spiralizer. OXO Steel Salad Spinner Deal price: $38; street price: $50 (use code FALL) Read our review of the best salad spinner. For details https://kitchenkm.com/blog Rubbermaid Brilliance Pantry Food Storage Containers (24-Piece Set) Deal price: $28; street price: $40 Read our review of the best dry food storage containers. Apple deals In the past few years, Prime members have also been able to nab deals on select Apple products. We expect to see discounts on the Apple Watch Series 5 if it remains available after the recent release of the Series 6 and Apple Watch SE, but keep an eye on our Apple Watch review, as the SE might be a better option (pending testing) for anyone who doesn’t need the ECG feature. The 8th-generation iPad has been just recently released, if you want the latest and greatest, and while we may not see huge discounts, initial discounts may appear. The 3rd-generation iPad Air may be worth your while if it’s cheap enough, as it too got a September refresh and the 4th gen is now available. We also expect to see MacBook Air and Pro models discounted to match previous sale prices in 2020. The previous-generation iPad Pro could be discounted, too, a tablet that our resident Apple expert, senior staff writer Nick Guy, still considers a great value if the price is right. Apple iMac (27-inch, with Retina Display) All-In-One Computer Deal price: $1,650; street price: $1,750 (10 gen intel core i5, Costco Members only) Read our review of the best all-in-one computer. Apple MacBook Air (13-inch, 2020, 8 GB RAM, 512 GB SSD, Space Gray) Deal price: $1200; street price: $1300 Read our review of the best MacBooks. Apple iPad mini (5th generation, 64 GB) Deal price: $336; street price: $385 Read our guide to why the iPad is the best tablet. Will the release of the Apple iPhone 12 affect Prime Day deals? Apple has a product announcement event on October 13, the first day of Amazon Prime Day. It's widely expected that the company will announce the iPhone 12 lineup, though actual availability dates are still unknown. For right now, Deals team has the feeling that the timing of this release might mean some deals on the iPhone 11 (our current top pick)—perhaps gift card or BOGO deals rather than price drops. You’ll probably want to pass if you’re an Apple aficionado with eyes for the latest and greatest tech, but if you want to save a few bucks on an iPhone that our guide writers love, this could be a good time to pick one up. Vacuums on Prime Day Vacuums are almost certain to see great prices during Prime Day, but some vacuum types in particular (robot vacuums from Eufy and Roomba and cordless stick vacuums from Dyson) have historically had the best Prime Day deals. Last Prime Day, we saw the Eufy Robovac 11S, our budget pick, drop all the way down to $150. Shoppers will have a variety of options to choose from, as we expect multiple models robot vacuums and cordless stick vacuums to be heavily discounted. For the best deals, keep an eye on all retailers, not just Amazon—vacuums at Walmart typically see good discounts, too, especially on Dyson vacuum refurbs and Roombas. Upright and canister vacuum sales are also a possibility, as we usually see at least one worthwhile Prime Day discount on our top pick from Shark. Even handheld vacuums have been the subject of Prime Day deals in previous years, so we’re likely to see vacuum discounts for every vacuum category covers. Dyson V8 Animal+ Cordless Stick Vacuum Deal price: $300; street price: $340 (For Costco members only) Read our review of the best cordless stick vacuum. Eufy RoboVac 30 Robot Vacuum Deal price: $160; street price: $240 (budget pick variant; free shipping for Prime Members) Read our review of the best robot vacuums. Best Battery LawnMower Deals Reddit 2020 Gaming deals When it comes to PlayStation and Xbox, the deals will essentially be for the last-gen consoles due to the impending release of the PlayStation 5 and the Xbox Series X. If you’re okay with last-gen technology, however, you’ll enjoy the best pricing we’ve ever seen for the older consoles, but we only recommend that you grab the Xbox One S or standard PS4, as you’ll overpay for the PS4 Pro or Xbox One X. Note that PS4 controllers won’t work on PS5 games, though Microsoft claims that all Xbox accessories save Kinect will be compatible with the Series X and Series S. Best Powerful cordless drill deals reddit The Nintendo Switch hasn’t seen any deals at all since very early in 2020, and we don’t expect to see any deals during Prime Day. In fact, since March it has been rare to find the slightly refreshed new Switch model (which offers longer battery life) available even at full price. Deals on the Nintendo Switch Lite are slightly more likely, as inventory is more steady. We will, however, likely see deals on recommended Nintendo Switch accessories such as the Switch Pro controller or charging accessories. PlayStation Store $100 Gift Card (Digital Delivery) Deal price: $90; street price: $100 (For Costco members only) Read our review of the best game consoles. Super Mario Party (Amazon) Deal price: $40; street price: $50 Read our review of the best game consoles. Super Mario Party (Walmart) Deal price: $40; street price: $50 Read our review of the best game consoles. Fitness deals As the coronavirus pandemic continues to impact gymgoers, quality home fitness equipment continues to experience high demand, which means its unlikely we’ll see deals in this category. Our top adjustable dumbbell pick, the Core Home Fitness Adjustable Dumbbell Set, has been sold out at reliable sources for months. Even large and expensive fitness gear like our treadmill picks and the Peloton bike are experiencing stock issues and shipping delays as shoppers attempt to duplicate their gym experience at home. At this point, we’d be happy to see many of our fitness picks in stock at all, and we’ll do our best to highlight these items if they become available. We are currently searching for the best deals on picks in this category and will add them here if we find them! Prime Day TV deals Amazon Prime Day has historically offered deals on budget and ultra-budget TV models doesn’t recommend that use Amazon’s own Fire TV interface, but in recent years we’ve seen more variety in the types of TV deals available. For instance, the newest TCL 6-Series line, our new top LCD/LED pick, could see some discounts, but Amazon Prime Day TV deals on Sony TVs are less likely, so new picks like the Sony X950H (for those seeking a wider viewing angle) will probably stay at full price. Finally, in 2019, we noted Amazon Prime TV deals that included bonus gift cards for our OLED pick, and hope to see similar deals for the newer LG CX, which will almost certainly be our new OLED TV pick. LG CX Series OLED TV Deal price: $3,700; street price: $4,100 (plus a $300 Visa Gift Card w/ purchase) Read our review of the best OLED TV. Samsung The Frame LCD TV 55" and other sizes Deal price: $1,100; street price: $1,400 Read our blog on designer TVs. Roku Streaming Stick+ Media Streamer (Amazon) Deal price: $37; street price: $45 Read our review of the best media streaming devices. Roku Streaming Stick+ Media Streamer (Walmart) Deal price: $37; street price: $48 Read our review of the best media streaming devices. Laptop deals Historically, we haven’t often seen great deals on laptops or computers during Prime Day, and we expect that to hold true this year, too. We’ve seen small deals on MacBook Pro laptops and some configurations of the MacBook Air recently which will likely stick around through the duration of Prime Day. We don’t expect to see too many deals from Amazon on Windows Ultrabooks, either, but that won’t stop us from keeping an eye on other retailers. The best Prime Day laptop deals we’ll see this year—if any—will likely be on Lenovo branded laptops, either through Lenovo itself or through Best Buy. Deals on Chromebooks, even small ones, will be very rare this Prime Day—so if you do see one, nab it while you can! In past years, we’ve seen a few good Amazon Prime Day computer monitor deals, but because of the pandemic, those too have been in short supply. Though we’re starting to see a few monitor deals crop up again, they’re usually on our budget or upgrade models, rather than our top or runner-up picks (which are still out of stock). In the run-up to Prime Day, we’ve also seen a few price drops on variations of our top mini PC pick, the HP Prodesk 600 G5. https://techbylight.com/best-gaming-notebook-reddit/ Dell U3419W Ultrawide Monitor & $100 Dell Gift Card Deal price: $648; street price: $770 (use code STAND4SMALL, $100 Dell Gift Card) Read our review of the best ultrawide monitors. Baby and kid deals Prime Day features a number of deals for kids, some of which are picked by Techbylight. Notably, we expect it to include some STEM toys we recommend in addition to bath, beach, and sandbox toys from Green Toys made from recycled materials. Gear for those with younger kids could well see deals too, with baby carriers, strollers, and car seats often available at a discount. Ergobaby 360 Cool Air Mesh Baby Carrier Deal price: $98; street price: $130 Read our review of the best baby carriers. Whole Foods, small business, and other early Amazon promotions On October 13 and 14, Prime Members will get an extra $10 for every $40 put on an Amazon eGift Card. From now until October 12, Amazon is offering Prime members a $10 credit to use on Prime Day when members spend $10 on items sold by select small businesses. From now until October 14, Prime members can spend $10 at Whole Foods Market online or in-store to get $10 to spend on Amazon during Prime Day. Prime members who spend $10 in an Amazon Go store through October 14 get $10 to use during Prime Day. Prime Members can use the QR code in the Fresh In-Store section of the Amazon app to get $10 to use on Prime Day when they spend $10. Use your Prime account to spend $10 at checkout at an Amazon Books or Amazon Pop Up, and you get $10 to use during Prime Day. Whole Foods promotions overall may be less robust than those of prior years and geared toward online purchases, but we’ll note any additional promotions we see as Prime Day approaches. What time does Prime Day start? This year, Amazon Prime Day will be held on October 13 and 14. The event will begin at midnight Pacific Time, that's an early 3 a.m. Eastern Time wake-up call for dealseekers. CNET previously reported that Amazon Prime Day would begin October 13, but until late September Amazon had confirmed only that it planned to hold Prime Day in the fourth quarter of 2020. As CNBC previously reported, during the summer Amazon provided sellers with the week of October 5 as a placeholder date. The retailer has typically held Prime Day during the second week of July, so this delay has pushed the event back by roughly three months. Buy on Amazon Prime Day or wait? Because Prime Day was delayed by three months this year, you may be wondering whether you should capitalize on Amazon’s deal pricing now or wait for the upcoming holiday sales—Black Friday and Cyber Monday are only about a month away, after all. Here are the products we think you should buy now, and what we think will see even better pricing in just a few weeks. Robot vacuums. We’ve always seen great deals on robot vacuums (like Roombas and Eufys) on past Prime Days, and we expect the same to be true this year. Robot vacuum deals will be around on Black Friday too, but we think you should buy now to avoid potential shipping delays around the holidays. Air purifiers. Last year we saw exceptionally good deals for air purifiers during Prime Day, but this year, we expect to see fewer deals and smaller discounts as wildfires have driven up demand—so if you see a deal on any of our purifier picks, snag it! Noise-cancelling headphones. This year’s Prime Day will almost certainly offer deals on all our noise-cancelling picks, whether you’re looking for over-ear headphones or our favorite earbuds. We have a feeling we’ll see the Bose Noise Cancelling Headphones 700, our top pick, sell for $300 or less, and the Anker Soundcore Life Q20, our budget pick, for $40 or less; we’re pretty sure the 1More Dual Driver ANC Pros, our top noise-cancelling earbud pick, will drop to $110, and the Jabra Elite 85H is likely to fall to less than $200. Canister vacuums. We expect to see some solid deals on powerful canister vacuums like our Shark picks in the NV350 and NV360 line this Prime Day, so if you spot a deal in your price range, pounce on it! Apple Watch. Whether you’re looking for deals on dwindling 5th generation Apple Watch models or like the already-budget-friendly SE, Prime Day will likely deliver. We think we’ll see great deals on select 5th gen models now that the Apple Watch 6 and SE have been released—but act fast if you spot a discount, since stock may be low. Just don’t fall for any “deal” on the Series 3; its technology will soon become obsolete. Nintendo Switch, accessories, and games. Nintendo Switch deals are far and few between, so if you happen across one, snap it up! Deals on Switch accessories and games will be a bit more ubiquitous this Prime Day, and we think you should capitalize on those discounts too if you find them. Wait on it iPads. Though we’ve already been seeing the price of the 8th generation iPad (which happens to be our upcoming top pick) drop by $30, but we think the deals will be better come Black Friday. However, if you happen to see the price fall by more than $50, you should definitely snag the deal. We’ll probably see a few deals for the 7th generation iPad, but we think you’ll get more bang for your buck by investing in the newer model, which has a better processor—so skip the discounts for the 7th gen. Outdoor security cameras. We think there will be better discounts on a wider range of outdoor security camera brands we pick closer to Black Friday, so if you can wait, you should. Unsurprisingly, Amazon prioritizes deals on its own branded items, so it’s likely we’ll see mega discounts on Ring cameras, but Techbylight doesn’t recommend them. Gaming console bundles and games. Hold off until Black Friday if you’re on the hunt for new gaming consoles or game bundles; the deals will almost certainly be better. You should also wait until late November if you’ve got your eye on early PS5 and XBox Series X titles. Stick vacuums. Though we’ll likely see Dyson stick vacuums on sale from Prime Day through Black Friday, we expect to see slightly better quality deals across a variety of models closer to the holidays.. Best Impact Wrench Deals Reddit What can we expect from Walmart, Target and Best Buy? Amazon competitors are certain to have sales that run concurrently with Prime Day, but some also have a history of starting sales before Prime Day. Savvy buyers can take advantage of those early sales to save on things that may sell out quickly on Prime Day itself. Here’s what we know so far about early sales, as well as sales that will happen during Prime Day, at Amazon competitors. Best Buy Early Black Friday Deals Best Buy has now formally announced that it will be running a sale of its own concurrent with Prime Day on October 13 and 14. This is a slight departure for them, as Best Buy has a history of preempting Amazon Prime Day with discounts of its own, and prior to Prime Day and Black Friday of 2019, we noted sales from Best Buy that approached and even matched pricing we saw during the deals mayhem later. Best Buy is framing this event as a preview of its Black Friday event, so we look forward to seeing what it includes. Walmart Big Save event Walmart’s Prime Day–competing sale event, called the Big Save event, started last night at 7 p.m. Eastern. Walmart has historically followed Amazon’s lead and run its sales concurrent with Prime Day, but the company seems breaking with that history this year. As part of this event, the Roku Streaming Stick Plus is discounted to $37, the lowest we've seen it this year—although Amazon has already matched that drop. The emergence of Walmart+, which launched September 15, could also mean deals with membership or a free trial. Though we haven’t seen any sales or savings exclusive to Walmart+ just yet, we’ll still keep our eyes open. Regardless, we expect Walmart to match much of Amazon’s Prime Day pricing when the event goes live (pricing that folks will be able to take advantage of without a Walmart+ membership), so Walmart could be an option if you don’t want to shell out for Prime (or get a free Prime trial). Amazon items and brands aren’t available at Walmart, however, so if you’re looking for those things, Amazon or Best Buy will be your best bet. Target Deal Days We saw Target expand its efforts to compete with Prime Day with its Deal Days promotion in 2019, and Target has now announced it will be doing the same in 2020 with a Deal Days promotion that will run concurrent with Prime Day. At the very least, we expect Target to match some of the better Apple deals out there. The most notable benefits of shopping at Target versus Amazon are the possibility of store pickup (if that appeals to you) and the presence of Target’s RedCard 5% discount and promotions. Although 5% isn’t a huge amount, it becomes significant on large purchases. Additionally, Target frequently offers RedCard-exclusive promotions—while those haven’t been overwhelmingly good during Prime Day events and Black Fridays past, we wouldn’t be surprised to see them more this year. Amazon Prime Day shopping tips and tricks Prime Day shopping can feel overwhelming, but we’ve compiled some tips to help you get the most out of the event. Comparison shop: Many Amazon competitors are going to offer competing sales during Prime Day. The Walmart Big Save event, Target Deal Days, and Best Buy's early Black Friday sale will be in full force. We’ll be looking out for deals that originate with them or Amazon price matches. You should, too, particularly if you have a cash-back card or belong to a program that saves you a little extra (like Target’s RedCard). Use third-party price trackers: Techbylight uses a combination of internal and third-party price-tracking tools to monitor price history, but Deals editor Nathan Burrow is still partial to CamelCamelCamel, which tracks Amazon pricing. It’s free to use, and although it’s imperfect, it provides some directional data that can at least set you on the right path. Consider Amazon’s Wishlist, Watch, and Waitlist tools: We know that’s a confusing mouthful. Wishlist allows you to curate items you’re already interested in. Watching an item is a tool you can use to flag upcoming deals during Prime Day and get alerts via the Amazon Shopping app when those deals go live. Waitlist is a tool you can use when you’ve missed a Lightning Deal—if someone else fails to follow through and purchase the item after adding it to their cart, you might be able to claim it. Ask Alexa: If you already have an Amazon smart device and want to ask Alexa about Prime Day deals, say “Alexa, what are my Prime Day deals?” In past years, we’ve even seen early-access deals for Alexa users. Using the Amazon app and the Amazon browser extension to find deals Last year, we saw a number of app-exclusive deals that you couldn’t get on a laptop, so it might be worthwhile to download the Amazon iPhone or Android app. During the event, you can use the app to track your favorites as you shop and keep an eye out for upcoming Lightning Deals available for preview. Once you claim a Lightning deal, you have a limited amount of time (15 minutes) to pull the trigger and complete the purchase before your claim expires. Turn on push notifications in the Amazon app to increase your chances of grabbing a Lightning Deal on an item you’re watching before it goes out of stock. Three sections to note before Prime Day: “Get Ready for Prime Day” banner: New for 2020, this allows you to subscribe to get deal notifications about select items on Prime Day. The suggested items appear to be served based on your shopping preferences, and if you opt in, you’ll receive deal notifications at 9 a.m. and 5 p.m. on Prime Day. “Start shopping early” banner: Here you’ll find pre–Prime Day promotions such as Amazon’s $50-off deal for Audible. “Get Prepped for Prime Day” section: View tutorials showing some of the features of the app, such as how to “watch” an item—a helpful trick to make sure you can grab upcoming Lightning Deals on Prime Day. This year the Amazon Assistant browser extension is seeing expanded functionality. The Amazon Assistant helps you compare while browsing and easily add an item (even non-Amazon items) to a wishlist, and it also makes personalized product recommendations. The browser extension also allows you to get alerts in your browser for items you’ve watchlisted on the app in addition to delivery updates, a nice feature if you’re switching between your phone and computer. Lightning Deals on Amazon Prime Day To get a Lightning Deal on Prime Day, first and foremost you’ll need to be a Prime member. You can grab a free 30-day trial in advance of the event or join on a more permanent basis for $119 per year if you’ve decided to make the leap. Students are eligible for a special $59-per-year rate. You’ll also need to be quick to click that buy button—as their name suggests, Lightning Deals are designed to go quickly and to create a sense of urgency. If you miss out, though, never fear. You can add yourself to a waitlist for Lightning Deal items you may have missed out on—if some percentage of the “sold out” item never goes all the way through checkout, you’ll get an alert, and you may be able to snap one of those remaining units up if they become available. We’ve also noted a trend of Lightning Deals ending and then coming back on day two of Prime Day, something to keep an eye out for. Finally, you can also add items you have your eye on to a wishlist via an “Add to List” button right next to where the “Add to Cart” button is located. You can even adjust your settings to get push notifications on your phone via the Amazon app for these items when and if they become available as Lightning Deals. Best Stylish Diaper Bag Backpack Deals Reddit
How To Leverage Long Blog Posts To Build Your Brand
You guys were not joking with the amount of shit posts that are ending up on this sub lately. So, in order to change that, I thought I would throw out something that I have done in the past and am still seeing success with today. Leveraging your blog posts/articles to build a BRAND. I did it, you did it, almost everyone does it. They get started, they crank out some content, and they expect money to come in. You can make a great living doing this, but you will find it almost impossible to hit the "next level" unless you focus on building a brand. You see the rare comment here of people hitting 20, 30, 50k+ per month....I would bet almost anything their site is a brand that people actually CARE about. In order to actually get there, you have to create value, have a strategy and create trust with your audience. But how the hell do you create value and trust with an audience that does not yet exist? One of those ways is utilizing a platform that people already trust: Amazon. The basic idea before we get into the actual guide is twofold. 1: You are going to take your longest article or articles, and turn them into an ebook. You will create a coveinterior and publish this on Amazon via the KDP platform. Chances are, no one will actually want to buy your 99 cent ebook, so you are going to make it FREE (with a work around) and use this as a lead gen for your website/email list. 2: You are then going to take your longest article/articles, and turn these into an AUDIO book, which again acts as a springboard from Amazon to your content to build trust, educate and let them know about your website. Step 1 brings you no money up front, but if you do this right can net you a LOT of affiliate income and build your list at the same time. Step 2 actually surprised me when doing my taxes. I currently have a single audio book live and it brought me in a few thousand dollars in royalties the past year and I havn't looked at it or touched it since. Here is a bit of proof that this works and has led to hundreds of thousands of downloads:
So, let's first go over the free book, and then the more exiting method the audio book. Creating A Free Book On Amazon With Your Blog Posts I am not going to go into detail on how exactly to create a book (this is fairly straight forward), but you will need two things. 1: Get a KDP Account (free): https://kdp.amazon.com/ 2: Get a Smashwords account (free): https://www.smashwords.com/ Create your book, format it, and get it uploaded to KDP. This is so straight forward (Google it) In order to get your book perma free on Kindle, you need to get your book free on other major retailers that Amazon actually has some respect for. The one that I used was Barnes & Noble and this took about a week. Here is how to do it! Smashwords Smashwords is another retailer of ebooks. What makes this service so powerful is that its free, and they also distribute to major retailers such as Barnes & Noble, OverDrive, iBooks, and Kobo. Upload your Book and set a price of free It will almost immediately go online at Smashwords as a free book. On your dashboard, you will see that it has been submitted for premium status. This is where the magic happens. A real person will take a look over your work, and if it has followed all of proper formatting, then it will soon show up in the big retailers mentioned above. It is VERY important that you follow their style guide. It can take a few days at a time for Smashwords to review your book. If it is not up to par, they will deny you, give you a list of things you need to fix, and then you can resubmit it. One of the things that I did wrong was do my table of contents a different way than they wanted. Another reason I was denied was that my book had links back to Amazon, so remove those as well if you want perma free status. Premium Status Achieved Once your book has been looked over and has achieved premium status on Smashwords, it is just a waiting game from here. Eventually, your book will show up on Barnes & Noble. This is one of the only online retailers that Amazon seems to care about. I tried to ask Amazon to price match me as soon as it was free on Smashwords, but it seems they have no respect for this service and I had to wait. Emailing Amazon Now, you could wait and wait and eventually Amazon should pick up on the fact that your book is free somewhere else. If you are not in the business of waiting for months on end, it is time to do something about it! What I did was take the URL from Barnes & Noble, and email Amazon from inside my KDP dashboard. At the very bottom of your dashboard, in super small text, you should see Contact Us. Click on Contact Us –> Pricing & Royalties –> Price Matching, and send them an email asking them to help you out. I told them I had a reader on my blog disappointed that he could get my book for free on my website as well as Barnes & Noble but had to pay for it on Amazon. A few hours later I got an email back stating that while they can decide to price match or not, they had forwarded it to the correct department and a few hours after THAT it was priced to free! Do keep in mind that this is going to be geo dependent. If you want your eBook free on All Amazon TLDs you need to give them links from all GEO URLs from the major retailers Note: There are a million and a half Facebook groups for free books. Go post in a few of them to get the ball rolling. Once you have those initial downloads, everything should take off and remain a stable stream of downloads and traffic back to your site if you put links in your book. ALSO, make sure to put some sort of ask at the end of your book for a review, a subscribe to the email list, or give the reader something if they visit your site. Now, let's get into how even more money is made, by taking that same book/books and turning them into audio books spreading your brand around the internet. Making Money Selling Audiobooks (ACX) Through Amazon Note: I am going to be copy and pasting images from my own site because there is no way I am downloading a rehosting these. Feel free to complain about self promotion in the comments XD. In order to be a successful internet marketer, you always have to be testing new ideas and markets. Time and time again I see people who want to make their first dollars online actually succeed in doing so but after many months or many years, it all dries up. Why? Because these people were not willing to adapt and keep learning. This is the number 1 reason that people fail. They do not want to test the market but keep doing the same thing over and over again, getting stuck in a vicious cycle. During some downtime a while back, I stumbled across a video of a guy doing thousands of dollars through audiobooks. What really perked my interest is that these books are being sold through Amazon, or more importantly, Amazon’s audio book platform audible.com. This is one of the biggest audiobook portals in the entire world and I myself have purchased a few during some long road trips. When I first started selling t-shirts online, the driving factor and where most of my success came from is that they are being sold on Amazon where the customers already are. I did not have to drive traffic at all, only give an existing audience what they wanted. This opportunity looks EXACTLY the same and the competition is so low, its crazy! Chances are, your blog posts will fit right in. Why Audible.com (Amazon’s Audiobook Platform)? The very first thing I did was take a quick look at how much traffic the platform was getting. I was seeing people put up some pretty impressive numbers (into the 10 figures a month range) so before I dove in, I wanted to make sure the market was actually there. What I did was take the domain (audible.com) and run it through similar web. This website is incredibly helpful in estimating the amount of traffic that a platform receives each and every month. It is WILDLY inaccurate, but gives a brief overview. https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/audible.png As you can see at the time of writing this (I wrote this ages ago), there is almost 22 million visitors per month with an average duration of close to 5 minutes. This is exactly what I want to see! Lots of traffic, and relatively little competition because there are not that many books out there. I was down to give this method a try and to my surprise over a year later, it actually worked. Getting Your First Audiobook Published on ACX Before you attempt to put up an audio book at all, you need to make sure you RESEARCH the niche. Just as with everything else when it comes to internet marketing, you need to make sure that there is customer demand, but that you can break into the market in the first place. The way we do this is pretty simple. Audiobook (ACX) Niche Research First, you want to look at Amazon.com for books (NOT audiobooks). For the sake of this example, lets use the first niche that came to my head “merch by amazon”. Head on over to Amazon.com and just type in the niche you are interested in. If you are pulling back results that are not books, just follow it up with “book”. https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/amazon-page.png At the very top of the image, you can see that there are over “10,000” results for this niche. This is a good sign, that means there is customer demand there! Customers want to read and learn more about this niche. I also happen to hold the first and third position for this keyword (those are my books) so it makes this experiment a little easier to start! Even if there are a lot of results, you want to make sure to click on the first page of products, and look at the BSR or best sellers rank of an item. The lower the rank, the better it is selling. You can see this in the product details section of the product page: https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/product-details.png The best sellers rank is dependent on the category you are selling in. In this particular instance, this book gets about this many downloads per day: https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/merch-by-amazon-book.png NOTE: Old screenshot but this book still averages almost the exact same downloads per day even over a year later. Now that we have determined that there is customer demand here, we need to check the competition on Audible.com In the upper right hand corner you will see the search box. This is where you want to put the same search term that you checked over on Amazon.com. Click on search and see what comes up! In this particular case there are ZERO results (note: there are now more than a few results). That means that there is definitely customer demand over at Amazon.com and there are literally zero books on this subject on the audible platform that Amazon owns (and gets 20+ million visitors each month). There is clearly an opportunity here. After you get good at searching, you will realize that almost every niche under the sun has very very little competition. What you want to look for is where there are lots of results with a good BSR (under 100k on Amazon.com) and you want to see that there is less than 100 results on Audible. The opportunities here are almost endless. Remember, it is all about niching down! Vegetable Gardening: https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/veggy-gardening.png Sleeping better: https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/sleep-better.png Make Money Online: https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/make-money-online.png If one of the most competitive niches on the internet (making money online) has such small search results, then you KNOW this is an untapped gold mine. NOTE: Screens are from when I published the book. Numbers are changed, but go check. Still stupid low competition in most niches that your blog posts are in. Getting Your Audiobook Created Now that we have a niche, we need an actual book! Any one of you reading this has the ability to write their own books. It does not matter if you are a great writer. However, if you are NOT a writer, no interest in being a writer, and simply want to get a book up to test this method, there is an easy way to do that. Outsource! I will be going over how to outsource the actual book creation as well as the audio voice over for that book once it is complete. Your book can be as long as you like or as short as you like. However, how long it ends up being is going to determine what kind of royalty you get once the entire process is complete. Because of this, I would recommend about 20-25k words per book. This should put your final audiobook at just over 3 hours in length and this is where you make the best money. To hit this, you may want to take a few of your articles and combine them. We have a niche, we have a target length for the book, now we just need to find someone to actually write the thing! Go hire someone or do it yourself. This is pretty self explanatory. I find that having a general outline for your book is the easiest way to get a good quality product. You can do this by looking at the chapter headings of some of the best sellers. Compile a list of all the headings, and then formulate your own online so that your book will be the most comprehensive book on the market for that niche. Upload Your eBook to Kindle (if you didn't previously) Before you can actually create your ACX book, you will need to upload your book to Kindle. This is a platform for ebooks that sell on Amazon and ANOTHER avenue for you to make money with your book (outside of audible sales). Head on over to kindle here: https://kdp.amazon.com/. Sign up for an account and enter in all your information so that you can get paid. Now that you have an account, you need a few other bits before you can actually upload your book. First, make sure you familiarize yourself with the cover requirements here: https://kdp.amazon.com/en_US/help/topic/G201113520 You now need to get a cover for your book created. The idea image requirements for kindle for your book cover are 2560 pixels by 1600 pixels. Your book cover is important!! I know everyone always says not to judge a book by its cover but we all do it. You do it, I do it, and your potential customers are going to do it too! Because of this, head over to upwork and post a job for an ebook cover designer. There are a lot of very very talented artists out there and you should get an amazing cover for your book for $20-$30 dollars. You can see here the cover that I went with that sticks out on the page: https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/blueprint-cover.png Now that you have your book and your cover, let’s upload to Kindle! Log in to Kindle and click on the Kindle new title button: https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/create-a-new-title.png After you are done adding the Kindle eBook, I would highly suggest adding a paperback as well. We will not be focusing on the paperback, but this is just another avenue that you can make money from your book. Give your book a title (what is on the book cover), an author, and a description. Make sure your description is long and detailed. I like to tell a little bit about what is in the book as well as outline the chapters and what the customer will be learning when they read the book. After you have filled those out, it is time to enter in some backend keywords. These are keywords that you want the book to rank for. Think like a customer here. Whatever they might search for, enter these as your back end keywords. You have 7 boxes of keywords to fill up here. No need for any punctuation. As long as the keywords are relevant, enter them in. Once you have your keywords selected, choose a category for your book, and then click on continue. Now all that is really left is to upload your book, the cover, and pick out pricing: https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/manuscript-.png You do not need to enter an ISBN so go ahead and click save and continue at the bottom of the page. Set your book at $2.99 or above, and select the 70% royalty share. If you price below $2.99, you will get a much smaller cut. Since we will not be focusing on the actual ebook, every time it sells, we want to maximize our profit. (This is if you are just doing audiobooks and not the free book method mentioned above) Now all you have to do is scroll to the bottom and click on publish your book! https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/publish-your-kindle-book.png It can take a while to publish, but I typically see all my books going live within 24 hours. You need to wait for your book to go live, so in the meanwhile, I would suggest publishing the paperback version as well! Publishing Your Book to ACX (Audible) If you have made it this far and are still with me, impressive. So far you should have a book with a cover, and it is published on Kindle meaning it is for sale on Amazon.com. This means we can FINALLY start creation of our audiobook! To begin, head over to ACX.com and sign up for an account. This is the dashboard for audible.com which is where we want to publish our book. Again, fill out all your information and take the tax interview. Once you have done that, click on “Add Your Title” from the upper right hand corner. Search by keyword and find your book on Amazon.com. Once you have found it, click on “This is my eBook”. https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/my-ebook.png Once you select your book, you will see a popup that asks what you want to do with your ebook: https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/produce-ebook.png Now the fun part starts! You can either upload audio for the book you already have (which I assume you don’t), of you can find someone to narrate the book for you. This is not going to be free, but you can find some real talent out there that will read your book and allow you to publish audiobooks without ever using your own voice. Select the first option and click on continue. Accept the terms and conditions, and click on continue. The next page is where you want to fill out your book information. Since your book is already on Kindle, most of this is going to be selected for you. The interesting parts are these: https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/book-deetz.png This lets you say that you want to receive auditions from narrators but also lets you describe the voice you are looking for. I like to select this based on the topic of the book and what would fit best. After you upload a test piece of your book for your narrator auditions, click on next. The next page is the MOST IMPORTANT part of the entire process. You can pick how you pay the person that is narrating your book. https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/pay-narrator.png By default, the first option is going to be selected (Royalty Share) but you do NOT want to do this! If you have a successful book, that means you will giving half your royalty away for many years to come. Instead, select pay for production and pay your narrators up front. I have found that the lowest level of $0-$50 per finished hour (PFH) works well and you get some quality people applying to narrate your book. For a book of 20,000 words, you can expect to pay a little over $100, but you do not have to do any of the work yourself! You will start getting auditions almost immediately over the next few days and you will be able to see this in your top menu. https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/auditions.png Make sure to go through all the auditions and listen to each one of them as everyone has their unique style and some attach specific notes about the project to their audition: https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/auditions2.png Once you have someone selected, all you have to do is then make an offer, and they will do the rest! The narrator you chose may send you a few questions over messages, so make sure you are watching your email whenever those come in. Once your narrator has finished the book, you have to approve it. After you approve it, you MUST pay your narrator before the book will go live on audible. This is not very clear for a first time user. I was expecting the system to use my card on file, but had to follow up and actually send the narrator the money over paypal. After that occurs, they will also approve the book, and it will get final approval from the ACX team! https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/approval.png Once you receive that email, it is just a waiting game as the book is pushed out to retail! https://neillassen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/book-to-audible.png TIP: If you email the ACX team and ask nicely, they will give you 25 codes for free books so that you can give them out to people for review. This is a good way to bump your book inside of audible and start getting downloads. Wrapping It Up When building your business, use every tool at your disposal to drive traffic and build up your audience. Focus on building a brand and not just a website.
If you’re starting from scratch with no traffic or influential friends, it’s easy to wonder… Is it reasonable for you to believe you can make money blogging? For that matter, how do blogs even make money? Ads? Or something else? Well, let’s take a look at exactly how I did it at Smart Blogger. Here’s my complete step-by-step process for how to make money blogging:
1. Choose a Profitable Blogging Niche
 Let’s start with a little brutal truth, shall we? Passion does not equal profit. Neither does expertise. Hard work doesn’t guarantee anything either. For example: You can be the world’s foremost expert on square-shaped tomatoes, wake up every morning with a burning passion to educate the public on their vast superiority to normal-shaped tomatoes, and work until your fingers bleed and your eyes fall out of your head, following all the right tactics for growing a popular blog, and… You’ll never have a chance in hell at making any money. Here’s why: Nobody but you gives a damn about square tomatoes Even if they did care, they wouldn’t spend any money In other words, you need a large audience who buys things. Without that, nothing else matters. It’s a prerequisite for everything else. In the case of Smart Blogger, I noticed early on that bloggers buy lots of different things:  In fact, there are companies with $10 million+ per year of revenue in most of those categories. It’s also a growing space with millions of people:  The only pVery to to Sherryroblem? Loads of competition. Whether it be my previous employers Brian Clark or Neil Patel, my good friends over at Problogger, or the gazillion other “blogging about blogging” peeps infesting the social media space, everyone was intent on snagging a piece of the pie. They also had a several year head start on me. So, how did I compete? The honest answer:
2. Level up Your Content Skills
 Embed This Infographic On Your Site You’ve probably heard that “Content is king,” and it’s true… to an extent. A more accurate statement would be… The Best Content Is King If that’s hard to understand, think about it this way: Lots of bloggers sit down and think, “What will I write today?” They jot down some thoughts, doing their best to be helpful, original, and entertaining. If they’re disciplined, they might even stick with it for a few months. But it almost never works. Here are a few reasons why: What you want to say isn’t what other people want to read You weren’t using a proven content framework It’s not the best post ever published on the topic Granted, it’s not your fault. Until today, chances are no one ever told you about any of those requirements. You thought you just had to write interesting stuff and publish it. No, grasshopper. No. The truth is, having good ideas and powerful words isn’t enough. you have to create the best content ever published on topics lots of people are interested in learning more about. And that brings us to the three levels of content creation: You know what content is popular in your niche, and you write exclusively about those topics You’ve mastered frameworks proven to make your content more popular (list post, how to post, etc.) Your content delivers more value to the reader than any other post published on that topic You’re probably thinking, “Geez. That sounds hard.” And you’re right, it is. I personally spent about three years honing my skills by writing for other sites before I started my own blog. It doesn’t have to take that long — I’m just a perfectionist, so I wanted to learn from the best people in my space.  It worked, though. Nowadays, my posts get millions and millions of visitors, not because I know some special “secret,” but because I’m really good at what I do. In fact, I’ll go ahead and say it… Blogging is really no different than anything else. The more of a bad ass you are, the easier it is for you to make money. So you want to know how to make some money blogging? Become a badass writer. Then the next step is to…
3. Figure out Which Traffic Sport to Play
 When you’re a beginner, getting traffic is confusing. Should you focus on optimizing your keywords? Growing your Facebook page? Leaving comments on blogs? Answering questions on Quora? Creating videos for YouTube? And so on. There are a gazillion traffic tactics out there. Everybody says theirs is the best. But here’s the data:  Source: Facebook and Google dominate web traffic, but not the same kind Pretty much all the traffic for written content comes from either Google or Facebook. The rest of traffic sources combined don’t even come close to competing with those two Goliaths. So, how do you get them to send you a bunch of traffic? One option is you can pay for it. They like that. But chances are, you’re reading about how to make money blogging because you don’t want to pay for traffic. You want it for free, right? Well, imagine this: There’s an arena where all the bloggers in your space go to compete for traffic. The number of other challengers you defeat determines the amount of traffic you receive. In other words, getting traffic is a sport. There are winners, and there are losers To be good, you have to train You need to study your opponents There are actually two sports, and I’d bet you’ve heard of both of them: search engine optimization (SEO) and going viral on Facebook. Both take years (yes, I said years) of study to master, but you can start getting pretty decent traffic after just a few months of study and practice. Which one should you focus on? Well, here are two questions to guide you: Is your topic something your friends and family regularly talk about on Facebook? Examples: pets, parenting, self-improvement, and health. If so, focus on playing the viral traffic sport. Is your topic something people actively search for information about on Google? Examples: product reviews, specific questions they would ask an expert, how-to information. If so, focus on SEO. For most topics, you can do both, but one or the other will be dominant. In that case, focus on whichever one is dominant. In the blogging space, for example, stuff about writing and grammar occasionally goes viral on Facebook, because we love criticizing our relatives about their terrible English. On the other hand, you rarely talk with your family about blogging platforms, WordPress plugins, affiliate marketing, or any other blogging topics. You will, however, search for them on Google. Just as you would guess then, the blogging niche is heavily dominated by search. Here’s a breakdown of Smart Blogger’s traffic by source:  The truth is, we pretty much ignore Facebook. The volume of traffic available there comes nowhere close to the volume of traffic available from Google. So, we focus on Google. I also spend WAY more time keeping up to date on SEO stuff than I do on social stuff. I’m a geek about it. Throw me in a room full of Google engineers, and I’d probably know more than half of them. Not to imply I’m the best, though. I’m also competing against people like Darren Rowse, Amy Lynn Andrews, and Neil Patel. They’re pretty freaking good too. In time, I think I can be better, but who knows? That’s why sports are fun. You never know who is going to win. If you’re good though, you’ll always be in the “playoffs,” for your space, and you’ll get lots of traffic. Maybe not the most, but still plenty. And then you can focus on how to…
4. Grow Your Email List with Pop Ups
 Chances are, you see pop ups as an annoyance. They get in the way when you’re trying to read. They ask you to hand over sensitive information like your name, email address, and phone number. Sometimes you have to deal with multiple pop ups on the same site, and it makes you feel hassled and uncared for. And all that sucks. In my opinion, you have every right to be annoyed. But here’s the thing… That’s where the money comes from. The best predictor of the revenue for a blog is the size of their email list. Here’s a breakdown of our revenue at Smart Blogger comparing revenue device from email to other sources. The rule of thumb is you can expect to make $1 per subscriber per month. So, if you have 10,000 email subscribers, you should be able to make about $10,000 per month. So obviously, growing your email list is a top priority. You might, however, feel conflicted about using pop ups. What are you supposed to do? Here’s a different way of looking at it: If a visitor comes to your site and doesn’t give you their email address, the chances of them returning are nearly zero. You’ll never have another opportunity to help them. If you believe your content is the best, and you believe you can help them over time, I believe you owe it to them to be as pushy as possible about staying in contact. In other words, not using a pop up is unethical. A little annoyance is a small price to pay for change. And remember, that doesn’t mean you have to be extremely pushy or spammy. You can absolutely use pop ups in authentic ways. But you absolutely must use them. Assuming you want to make money, anyway.
5. Begin Monetizing with Affiliate Offers
 So, you’re operating in a profitable niche, and you have traffic and an email list. What next? Lots of bloggers jump into creating a course or book or community of some sort, but that’s a mistake, in my opinion. Before you start selling things, you need concrete evidence those things are what people want to buy. Otherwise, you’re risking wasting months or even years of your life trying to push a product no one wants. The simplest way to obtain that evidence: Affiliate offers. By seeing what your audience buys from other people, you can get a much better sense of what they might want to buy from you. If you promote a product and it converts well, you should think about creating a similar product. If it doesn’t convert well, you should probably move on. In other words, affiliate offers are a form of market research. As a bonus, you just so happen to get paid commissions on the products your customers buy in the process. So not only are you learning what your audience wants to buy, but you’re making money from your blog at the same time. Pretty sweet deal. At Smart Blogger, I’ve tried lots of different offers. WordPress hosting, landing page tools, email marketing software, WordPress themes, and half a dozen different types of courses. Since we sell courses, I pay the most attention to the results from those programs, and here are a couple of lessons: End to end solutions sell best. Courses promising to take someone from knowing nothing to making money far outperformed the others. For instance, here’s a screenshot showing us as the #1 affiliate for Danny Iny’s Course Builder’s Laboratory: Tools with a clear connection to making money also sell better than the others. For instance, landing page builders. As proof, here’s a screenshot of our earnings from promoting LeadPages: By themselves, neither of those promotions really moved the needle on our revenue, but they did teach us useful lessons that went into creating Freedom Machine, which brings us to…
6. Develop a Unique Mechanism
 Before you think about launching your own products or services, there’s one essential point about human nature you need to understand: Whenever anyone purchases anything, they expect to transition from where they are now (Point A) to where they want to be (Point B). For example… When you buy pizza, you want to transition from being hungry and craving pizza (Point A) to tasting delicious pizza and feeling full (Point B). When you hire a plumber, you want to transition from having a clogged, overflowing toilet (Point A) to having a normally functioning toilet (Point B). When you buy a course on SEO, you want to transition from feeling bewildered and getting ignored by Google (Point A) to ranking for competitive terms and getting traffic. The success of a product ultimately depends on helping customers make those transitions. If the customer doesn’t get to Point B, they typically view the experience as a failure. So, here’s the magic question: What makes you better equipped to deliver that transition than your competitors? The answer to that question is what marketing expert Todd Brown calls your “unique mechanism.” It’s a little different from a “unique selling proposition,” because it’s not just something about you that’s different. It’s something about you or your method that makes you better able to help customers than anyone else. For Freedom Machine, we have multiple unique mechanisms: Get published on Medium — a platform with more than 60 million active readers looking for content You don’t have to struggle with setting up your blog. We do it for you. A research concierge who will do your research for you instead of having to pay for expensive tools Content frameworks developed behind the scenes at Smart Blogger to produce popular content A monetization methodology proven by our success with Smart Blogger Advice on how to automate everything, so you eventually get more freedom Weekly calls with me where I will help you set up your Freedom Machine Combined, those unique mechanisms are EXTREMELY convincing at setting us up as the superior solution. Therefore, the product sells like hot cakes. To be clear… it’s not necessary to have 7 different unique mechanisms. Sometimes just one is all you need (i.e. fresh, hot pizza in 30 minutes or less). The core idea though is to make sure you are obviously far more capable than your competitors at delivering results. Then all you have to do is…
7. Launch the Minimum Viable Funnel
 Look around at successful entrepreneurs of any type, and you’ll find a surprising trend: They tend to sell their products before the product is created. To most people, this sounds like insanity at best or a disturbing lack of ethics at worst. How could you possibly ask people to buy something that doesn’t exist? The answer: It’s the same principle as Kickstarter.  You create a fancy minimal sales funnel of some sort (in this case, just a simple sales page), tell people the product is coming soon, and then wait to see if enough people sign up to justify making the product. If they don’t, you refund everyone’s money and start over. In other words, it’s the final step in validating you have a viable product. The steps go like this: Identify demand by promoting affiliate products Find a unique mechanism that makes you clearly superior Test the demand for that unique mechanism with a quick and dirty launch before you create the product In my case, the minimum viable funnel was a 90 minute webinar. The first time I did it, there was no product, no follow-up sequence, nothing. It was just a bare-bones test. And it resulted in $126,000 in sales live on the webinar. Seeing that $30,000 sales was my minimum for success, we went ahead and created the first version of the product live with students. About a year later, it’s now approaching $1 million in sales. That’s also just one product. We have others, and we have still more in the research pipeline. And guess what I would do if I had to start over again? The exact same thing. It’s not easy, it’s not fast, it’s not even that sexy, but it works. Go to top 7 Ways to Make Money Blogging (with Examples!) Now that you have a general framework to use, let’s jump into the specifics of how to make money blogging, including real-world examples you can study and learn from. Here are the top 7 ways to make money blogging:
1. Online Courses and Workshops
Here at Smart Blogger, we make most of our income from online courses and workshops — over $1 million per year — but we are far from the only ones. Most of the people making serious money from their blogs are doing it through courses Ramit Sethi reportedly crossed $10 million dollars in annual revenue with his suite of premium courses:  And it’s not only business or wealth focused topics that are doing well. You can find blogs on just about any topic monetizing with online courses. For instance, the popular interior designer Maria Killam has quite a few courses and workshops in her catalog: 
2. Books and Ebooks
Quite a few writers have parlayed their blogging success into a major publishing deal. Mark Manson, for instance, published a post called The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck in 2015. Millions of readers later, he got a book deal with Harper Collins and went on to sell over 3,000,000 copies in the US alone.  Self-published books have also been successful. The most notable success story among bloggers is probably James Altucher’s Choose Yourself, which is now sold over 500,000 copies: 
3. Affiliate Marketing
If you’d like to earn some passive income from your blog, one of the best choices is affiliate marketing — recommending the products and services of other companies in exchange for a commission. Here at Smart Blogger, we make more than $100,000 per year promoting affiliate products, most of that coming from casually recommending products we love like Siteground (affiliate link) and Ahrefs (affiliate link). But there are lots of other examples too. For instance, Digital Photography School has reportedly made over $500,000 in Amazon commissions from promoting photography equipment: 
4. Advertising
Normally, we’re not big fans of selling ads on your site. You need roughly a million visitors per year for the large advertising networks to take you seriously, and affiliate marketing is almost always more profitable and just as passive. That being said, some niches like recipes, fashion, and news are hard to monetize through many of the other methods mentioned here, and they get LOTS of traffic. In that case, putting a few ads on your site can make sense as a supplementary income source. For example, here’s a screenshot of a 2016 income report from Share the Yummy:  Normally, you make money by joining a network. Nearly anyone can join Google AdSense, for example, and you can later grow into more selective networks like Mediavine and AdThrive.
5. Speaking Gigs
If your blog takes off, and you start being recognized as an authority in your space, you might be surprised by how many invitations you get to speak at conferences. And it’s amazingly profitable. I typically make a minimum of $10,000 per speech and it can go as high as $100,000 when you count product sales resulting from the speech. Not bad for a 60-90 minute talk. 
6. Consulting/Coaching
While this certainly isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, doing a bit of coaching or consulting over the phone can earn you a surprisingly nice living, even when your audience is small. I don’t do consulting anymore, but the last time I did, I charged $1,000 an hour with a six-month waiting list. But I’m not the only one. Going back to Maria, again, she’s been quite innovative coming up with ways to do design consultations by photo and email, currently charging $1,275 per room:  You can make this work in almost any space. You just need to know what you’re doing and be confident in the value you are providing to clients.
7. Selling Freelance Services
The next step up from consulting is to actually do it for them. Typically, you’ll make more money with this than anything else, but it’s also the most draining and time intensive. That being said, I’ve seen bloggers make six-figure incomes with no more than a few thousand readers on their blog, essentially using their blog as a lead mechanism to get clients. It’s so profitable, even if successful bloggers continue to do it. For example, Elna Cain continues to sell her freelance writing services:  If you’re a writer, designer, photographer, programmer, or other service provider where your skills can be sold digitally instead of you having to be there in person, you might want to consider it from day one. All you really need to get started is a contact form for clients to reach out to you. Let’s close with some questions and answers, shall we? Go to top FAQ about How to Make Money Blogging So, we’ve covered the basic process. Now let’s step back for a moment and answer some of the questions I hear the most often: Do bloggers make money? I certainly do, but I don’t think that’s what you’re asking. I think you’re asking… “Is it reasonable for me to learn how to make money blogging?” The no BS answer: It depends on how patient and persistent you are. Starting a blog from scratch is just as difficult as starting any business. For example, it requires the same time and effort as starting your own restaurant, software company, or accounting service. Yes, those businesses are wildly different, but the first few years are usually the same story: low income, lots of stress, big learning curve. If you want a more concrete answer than that, we’ve found it takes even our smartest, most dedicated students 3-6 years to make enough money from blogging to quit their jobs. And that sounds like a long time, but so what? 3-6 years to be able to work from anywhere in the world, take a vacation whenever you want, and probably have passive income until the day you die? Sounds like a pretty good deal to me. How much money can you make from blogging? The fact is, most bloggers make as much money as any other type of entrepreneur: Nothing. And it’s not because there’s no money in it. This blog makes more than $1 million per year, for God sakes, and it’s nowhere close to the most profitable blog out there. Blogs like The Penny Hoarder, Moz, and Lifehacker power businesses worth hundreds of millions of dollars.  So why aren’t more bloggers rich? The truth is, most people quit. They start a blog, realize it’s hard work, and walk away. But if you’re patient and persistent? You can make millions. I have. So have lots of other smart, dedicated entrepreneurs. You just have to do the work. Consistently. For years. Can you do that? Then yeah, I think you can make six figures at least. Maybe more. How do you make money blogging? (Or, How do bloggers make money?) As I mentioned earlier, there 7 popular ways to make money blogging: Offering online course and workshops Writing books and eBooks Affiliate marketing (recommending products and services in exchange for a commission) Blog ads Speaking at conferences Offering your expertise as a consultant or coach Selling freelance services such as writing, designing, and programming Which is best for you will depend your blog, your expertise, and your situation. How do you start your own blog for free? Lots of people say you can’t. They tell you to buy a domain name and a hosting account and a premium WordPress theme. But I think that’s nonsense. You can get started for free within five minutes on Medium. They also have over 60 million monthly readers, so you can get a lot of exposure there if you get featured.  This article walks you through that strategy, step-by-step. Alternatively, you can write on WordPress.com, Linkedin, or any of the other platforms out there. It doesn’t really matter. The point is, start writing and learning as soon as possible. Once people start sharing your articles, and you begin to understand how everything works, then you can go through the trouble of setting up your own site, installing WordPress, and all that jazz. Until then though, it’s just a headache you don’t need. What are the most popular blogging platforms? WordPress is by far the most popular. No one else is even close. But that doesn’t mean it’s the best for everyone. There are several — and most of them are free. As I mentioned earlier, I think Medium is a good place to start. You can also create your own blog with tools like Blogger, Squarespace, Wix, Joomla, and countless others. What are the top blogs about how to make money blogging? I’d like to think Smart Blogger is the best (and most comprehensive) site on the topic, but it’s by no means the only one. Not all of these talk about how to make money blogging, but together, they give you a solid foundation:— Brian Dean doesn’t talk much about how to make money blogging, but he’s one of the top experts and educators in the world on SEO. What I love about his content is how easy to understand it is, despite covering some incredibly complex topics. If you’re a beginner, prepare for a treat. — In my opinion, my friends over at Digital Marketer are the best in the world at monetizing traffic. If you’d like to learn about marketing, list building, customer research, automation, or funnels, there’s no better source. If you’re interested in using your blog to build passive income, Pat Flynn is a master at showing you how to build a tiny little business that can support you and the lifestyle you want. Both his blog and podcast are excellent. Want me to walk you through all of the steps? Here's a free workshop where I'll walk you through the steps, so you can understand EXACTLY what you have to do to be successful. The Bottom Line about How to Make Money Blogging Is it possible? Absolutely, but only if you treat it as a business. Yes, you can start your blog as a side project. Yes, you can slowly grow it in the background. Yes, you can turn your blog into a source of passive income that eventually lets you quit your job, travel, spend more time with your family, whatever you want to do. But like anything worthwhile, it’s hard work getting there. You have to study. Practice. Master your craft. If you love writing, I can’t imagine a better business, though. Not only is blogging a great way to get your writing noticed, but it’s a great way to connect with people around the world who need you, teach them what you know, and get paid pretty damn well in exchange. There’s never a day I regret dedicating myself to blogging. Never. It’s not just because of the money, either. It’s because I also get to do what I love and help people at the same time. What could be better than that?
Book 1 of The HEL Jumper Book 2 of The HEL Jumper ----- Previous | First | Next | Patreon Thanks to Tulip, Big_Papa_Dakky, Mr_Polygon, txgunman65, Darth Android, Mamish, Vikairious, Sam Berry, ClarityAndVision, RedHawkdude, KillTech, LilLaussa, Daddy Talon, Gruecifer, Gaelan Darkwater, and 34 others currently supporting me . ----- Bonus Art! ----- “Thank you for joining us this evening. I appreciate it,” Antoth spoke to Alice as the two of them sat around Ratha’s small table with bowls of stew. “Oh don’t act like it’s such a sacrifice. Her brother’s the one I want to knife,” Ratha snarked, sitting between them. “And yet your knives and arrows never find him unless he’s armored,” Antoth murmured pointedly as Alice coughed. “Please forgive my mate for her empty threats, Alice. Being with cub has changed her.” “You’re damn right it has! Sometimes you seem to forget that it’s your seed that grows in my belly,” Ratha leered. “Enough!” Antoth raised his voice to head off what was, in Alice’s opinion, a partially justified tirade on Ratha’s part. “We are here so that she can explain to us what will happen tonight when the shuttle arrives. Alice, please.” “Thank you for your hospitality, Ratha,” Alice began politely. The Huntress’ stern facial expression did not shift an iota, but she did flare her feathers curtly. “Antoth, I believe that my people can aid yours through an understanding of the Cauthan body and the development of a standardized practice of healing and medicine for your people. I hope to introduce two of my colleagues to you soon. With your permission I believe they can assist greatly in this matter. And I can assure you that Io and Russell will be present at all times while aboard the Event Horizon to oversee our interactions with your people.” “And why do you need Veera and Xan?” Antoth pressed, a patient frown on his face. Alice nodded as she swallowed a spoonful of stew. “I cannot learn about what I cannot observe.” “You can gut the mutt for all I care, but if you touch a feather on Xan’s head I’ll skin you alive,” Ratha hissed. “Ratha!” Antoth roared, pounding his fist into the table. “You were not there aboard that ship. You did not see what I saw. You do not understand the power that spirit Io possesses and the respect afforded to Winters. You did not see how terrifyingly incredible humanity is; and if you value our own lives or the life of our cub you will cease your needless provocations! Alice,” Antoth transitioned back to the human who looked truly uncomfortable. Ratha remained silent. “You will not be harmed so long as I am High Priest. You trusted us in leaving Private MacGregor at his post to meet with us tonight, and I will afford you whatever trust I think is prudent in turn. So please help me understand better why I should allow two of my own to be swallowed up by that metallic beast.” Alice nodded quietly, deciding that the ‘smallpox method’ would likely be far less effective on Antoth. She opted for a broader picture instead. “You saved my brother’s life, Antoth. My people dragged ourselves from subsistence to the stars over hundreds and thousands of years. To the extent possible I wish to confer those gifts to your people within a single lifetime, starting with better care of your bodies.” “What’s in it for you?” Ratha demanded, narrowing her eyes in search of deception. “And hold your tongue, oh mate of mine. I deserve this answer.” “Of course, Ratha. Pure benevolence is quite rare among humans too. You seemed to have snared the exception to the rule in Antoth,” Alice ventured, her chest tightening as she prepared for the very real possibility of having her abdominal cavity torn open by a hormonal Cauthan mother. To her immense relief, a smirk developed on Ratha’s muzzle. “Snared is the right word, human. Now answer me,” she insisted. Alice composed herself, sat straight, and replied. “I seek to gain reputation and notoriety among my people, to be recognized as one of humanity’s leading scholars. I want to repay a debt on behalf of my family to your village. Finally my brother, spirit Io, and I all have an interest in seeing your people raised up as humanity’s partner so we can prove that symbiotic uplift is possible; and to rub it in the face of every Ghaelen we see,” Alice finished aggressively. Ratha cocked her head at the mention of Ghaelen, but Antoth chuckled deeply. “Satisfied, Ratha? She, her family, and her species all have something to gain.” “Just make sure the trade is equal,” Ratha insisted as her cooking fire popped and sparked in the enclosed space. “You are welcome to come aboard whenever you like,” Alice extended the invitation. “And I would be happy to report my progress to you directly.” “I will…do so if necessary,” Antoth replied, a hint of uneasiness creeping into his voice as his stomach recalled the shuttle ride to the Event Horizon. “Thantis should receive your direct reports. Now my understanding is that you do not have an indefinite time before you must depart. Let us finish our meal in the spirit of cooperation. Would your friend like to join us?” Antoth offered. Alice shook her head, tucking her hair over her shoulder as she leaned in for another bite of some of the freshest stew she’d ever tasted. “He insisted he’d be fine tonight.” Ratha purred threateningly at his mention. “And I’ll make sure of that.” ----- “Are you certain, Lachlan?” Sentaura asked, busying herself around the cooking fire as Ursol did his level best to touch everything of Lachlan’s he could. Fortunately for the adults in the room, any ammunition or explosives not on the Marine’s person were locked away tightly. He checked the eyepiece on his helmet, tracking Pilot Cromwell’s descent. “If yer cookin’ is half as good as Veera’s I’ll sorely miss it, Sentaura,” he offered. “But my shuttle’s already on its way. We’ve got food aboard the ship and I wouldn’t want to impose on ya. Ye can probably tell I pack it away somethin’ fierce.” “It is still my duty to host you, human,” she insisted, her eyes sharp and focused. “You will not eat with us nor sleep under our roof tonight? If there is something not to your liking then-” “I beg yer pardon, fluffy lass. It’s nothin’ like that,” MacGregor said earnestly, his eyes widening as he realized he’s let slip such a colloquialism. “Excuse me? What is a ‘lass’?” Sentaura requested. “Ah, it's a common word in my native tongue for a young woman, such as yerself,” Lachlan hesitantly explained. “I meant no disrespect and I certainly meant none in leaving tonight. But Alice and her brother are stayin’ aboard tonight, so that’s where I should be too. I’ll leave that here for ya both,” he pointed to his bedroll. “Is there…something I can get for ya when I’m up there? We can make most anythin’.” The Marine felt something akin to ice water drip down his ribs and pool around his diaphragm. Sentaura’s feathers were shaking and her eyes had hardened. “I do not need your charity,” she hissed quietly, her ears turning slightly as a far-off rumbling could be heard in the sky above. “I believe that is your people, Lachlan. You should go.” Unwilling to protest or attempt to explain anything when there was a decent possibility of digging a deeper hole for himself, Lachlan nodded silently instead. The Marine gathered up his effects and weapons, patting the ever excitable Ursol on the head and letting the little one know that the new bed would be his for the night if he so wished. When the young Cauthan finally realized that Lachlan was leaving, he tottered after him and threw himself about the human’s leg. “You can’t go!” He insisted with urgency. “You no come back!” Sentaura looked miserably ready to scold her boy but Lachlan knelt on the floor, rubbing the cub’s head. “I’m not goin’ into that spooky forest, young laddie. I’m going back up to the sky, where my people are. It’s safe there, and I’ll be back to pick ya up from school on the morrow. But I want you ta have this when I’m gone,” the Marine insisted, reaching for his throat and grabbing the narrow, metal chain that rested there. He removed his helmet and then his tags, handing the latter to Ursol. “What’s this?” Ursol asked curiously. “That’s a very important thing, you’ve got there. So long as ye keep that safe, I have ta come back to ya. It’s against the rules for me ta leave without ‘em. Alright?” Lachlan tried to explain, not having the faintest idea whether or not Ursol would understand. The cub looked up at him before wearing the tags for himself. They came down to his waist. “I keep forever!” “Well, I’ll be needing them at some point-” “Forever!” Ursol insisted. Lachlan took a moment to collect himself before smiling down at the cub. He nodded once to him and then to his mother. “As you say, wee laddie. I’ll be back tomorrow. Selah, Sentaura.” “Selah,” she whispered only when she could no longer hear the sound of his boots. ----- “Mac, you alright?” Alice demanded as he approached the western gate. Xan, Veera, and Winters were already there, the latter armed and armored for the trip. She was thankful he'd procured a leash and harness for Fenrir, who also seemed to be coming along. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just thinkin’ I might need a bit of a crash course in xenoanthropology. Managed ta upset both the boy and his mum in the span of a minute.” “What did you do?!” Alice hissed quietly as the sound of the shuttle touching down afforded them a moment of privacy. “Nothin’!” He insisted. “Well at least it didn’t seem like anythin’! I just said I had ta go back up to the ship with the lot of ye and then she’s all terse about how I’m rejectin’ her hospitality. Then of course the little guy thought I wouldn’t be comin’ back.” “Nothing else?” Alice wondered, her tone making it clear there had to be something. “I asked if Sentaura needed anything from the Event Horizon?” “Well there’s your problem!” Alice chuckled, throwing an arm around his broad shoulders and walking him over to Brick. Cromwell was in the process of opening the main doors for them. “You insulted her pride. Don’t need to be a xenophile like me to understand that, just good with women!” “Do I look like a man who’s good with the lasses, much less fluffy lasses who also happen ta be mums?” Lachlan demanded, nodding to Russell as he hauled himself aboard the shuttle. Alice seated herself next to him as Cromwell began conversing with the Jumper, Veera, and Xan. Fenrir was a point of some contention. “I don’t see why you shouldn’t be, Lachlan.” ----- “Good to see you again Lieutenant. You as well, Veera. Are you coming aboard too, young man? What about the wolf cat thing?” Cromwell asked, guessing at Xan’s sex given her introductory conversations with both Antoth and Veera. “Pilot Elizabeth Cromwell at your service.” “My name’s Xan…just Xan,” the Cauthan replied. “That's a hyrven. What’s a pilot?” “I get to fly that thing,” Cromwell boasted, throwing a thumb over her shoulder. “I don’t mean to intrude, but the Admiral wants a report on who or what is coming up with each trip. Do you have anything interesting in the basket there, Veera? Doubt it would be more interesting than a wild animal in any case.” “He's quite well behaved, thank you. Otherwise it’s just food for myself, Fenrir, and Xan, some dried meat and vegetables,” she explained. “I’ll let him know. Need any help there, Xan?” Cromwell asked. “I’m fine,” he said tersely. “So how do you get that much metal to fly?” “Do you want the short answer or the long answer?” “How should I know?” Xan retorted, placing his cane on the floor of the shuttle and lifting his injured leg. Anyone watching him would be able to conclude the effort was painful, but he managed unassisted. “Damn that feels real great. How about the short answer?” He decided, taking a seat next to Alice who looked more than eager to show him around the system of straps and buckles. Upon seeing Xan enter the shuttle, Fenrir did the same. He protested noisily at first thanks to the feeling of metal against his paws, but Xan soon had him calm again and the pilot feeling safe enough to re-enter her own shuttle. “Looks like a zoo in here now. Short answer, Xan? You push, real hard,” Cromwell told him, smirking behind her helmet’s visor. He chuckled. “I guess you’d better push something fierce if we’re going to Kel’s domain.” “Oh don’t worry Xan, I do,” Cromwell assured him before heading for the cockpit. Alice called after her. “No flirting with my patients, Pilot!” “No need to project, Alice!” Cromwell sniped back, her British accent thick with humor. “I’ve done nothing of the sort!” The xenobiologist insisted adamantly as Xan suddenly found himself caught between two human females. It was a relief when Winters sat next to him and took a firm hold of Fenrir's harness. “Before you say anything, I’m fine,” Xan told him. Russell removed his helmet and cocked a brow at him. “There are three women in here who clearly have the whole doting on you thing covered. I want to know if you’re ready to rumble,” the Jumper replied. “Of course I- woah!” Xan yelped, gripping his own restraints tightly as Cromwell began the process of ‘pushing’ them back to the Event Horizon. “Haha! Welcome to the twenty-first century, Xan!” Russell exclaimed, earning a roll of his sister’s eyes. As soon as they began their ascent, Cromwell hailed them from the cockpit. “Alice? The Admiral’s on the line.” “Sure thing,” she acknowledged as Cromwell patched the call through. Natori’s beaming face could be seen on the screen in the main cabin. “Hello? Alice? There seems to be quite a bit of fur, armor, and feathers in the way. Perhaps we should redesign the grizzly class’ interior? Who figured putting the communications panel on the same side as all of the seats was a good idea? And is that some sort of twin tailed leopard?” “Uh…we designed the shuttle?” Alice suggested, leaning forward, turning to her left, and waving at the screen. Natori was stroking his chin thoughtfully. “Yes, I suppose we did. Excellent design if you plan to shoot at something outside. I digress. How are you, Alice? Based on your messages it sounds like we’re about to embark on quite the journey of discovery! I've set aside one of the basic spectroscopy machines for you.” “I’m well, Natori. And thank you.” “Ah, hello to you as well Veera, Lieutenant, Private. And I don’t believe we’ve been introduced yet. You must be Xan,” Kaczynski deduced, glancing quickly at the missive Alice had sent earlier in the day detailing who would be returning on the evening shuttle. “Try not to be a little punk? That guy’s our equivalent of Antoth,” Russell advised out of the corner of his mouth. “Yeah, they’re even the same color,” Xan agreed before addressing the Admiral. “I’m Xan, apprentice priest of Kel.” “And I am Admiral Natori Kaczynski of Beta Division. It’s a pleasure,” he said politely as the shuttle climbed into the upper atmosphere. “Now before we engage in too many pleasantries I would like to inform you all of some changes aboard the Event Horizon in anticipation of your arrival. Lieutenant, if you please?” Russell saw that his armor had received a message via the shuttle’s communications network, prompting Io to activate the B-MASS’ projector. A model of the Event Horizon spun slowly before them, captivating Xan’s gaze as it zoomed in on the bow portion of the ship. "In preparation for an ongoing Cauthan presence aboard the vessel, a handful of crew and passengers were relocated away from hull divisions one and two. With the help of whatever computational capacity Io left behind-” ‘Oh do not sound so much like a lost puppy, Admiral. I’m on my way back now,’ the AI assured him with a confident smile. “And I look forward to spending some time with you,” the Admiral declared unabashedly before redirecting their attention to the Event Horizon. A thin corridor of crew berths, labs, and hallways were glowing brighter than the rest. On one side they connected to hangar A-1 with its specialized sterilization equipment. On the other, to a hangar in section C-2. “As you can see, we have managed to create a partially isolated environment within the Event Horizon. Lieutenant Winters, while you appear to be in fine health and there were no adverse consequences from our brief diplomatic meeting a couple days ago, I have deemed it necessary to more thoroughly examine whether Mara holds any dangers for humanity by way of pathogens, foodborne toxins, etc. The same is equally true in the reverse. I appreciate your bravery, Xan and Veera, and I have taken every possible step to ensure that you are protected while on my ship. As you can all see, should you wish to access the rest of the ship you will simply have to proceed through the facilities adjacent to hangar A-1 for decontamination. Alice, please make this process’ suitability for Cauthan anatomy a priority of your research.” “I will, sir. Thank you for all of this effort. I’m sorry to have inconvenienced some of the crew,” Alice responded graciously. “You know well enough that we’re far from capacity. It was no problem,” Kaczynski insisted with a wave. “If anything, the crew was upset they wouldn’t be able to see Cauthan in person! But I believe that with all threat of conflict abated; we must proceed with caution and deliberacy. Is he potty trained?” The Admiral pointed at Fenrir. “Man, he enjoys his big words,” Xan muttered. "And no, Fenrir pretty much does his business wherever he wants near as I can tell." “And I would be happy to continue to confuse you if it so pleases,” Natori didn’t miss a beat. "Why did you decide to bring a pet aboard, Alice? I doubt he's for study?" "Without Xan, myself, or Veera around we aren't sure about his behavior, sir. He is a wild animal, but has been raised within the village since infancy. I'll take full responsibility," Russell cut in. Natori nodded. "I would be more comfortable with a muzzle, but I cannot deny the thrill. How old is he? Nevermind, I'm getting distracted. Alice, you and Private MacGregor have been given single cabins within the…" Natori paused and briefly licked his upper lip. "Cauthan zone. Quarantine sounds so…diseased. Lieutenant, given your rather unprecedented change in marital status, I have allocated a double cabin for you and Veera." Russell looked at his wife briefly and back to Kaczynski. "Thank you, sir." "Thank you very much," Veera followed suit, picking up on the fact that perhaps she and he had been given something special. Natori waved it off. "But of course! It seemed prudent given the fact that we are effectively stuck here until we determine the exact nature of whatever is affecting the warp point of this system. Xan, if you are to be a regular guest on my ship there are a handful of empty berths you may choose from." "Oh…thanks," Xan replied, far too focused on the odd weightlessness affecting his body than on anything the human on screen was saying. Cromwell had just killed the main thrusters for their approach and Fenrir was getting agitated. "Easy now boy, easy," Winters encouraged, taking the oversized 'dog' into his arms with ease thanks to the lack of gravity. The hyrven growled and whined but didn't try to escape. "I can see it might be best to leave anything further for once you're safely aboard," Natori said. "I shall be by tomorrow morning before the shuttle launch at a minimum. Lieutenant?" "Yes sir?" Winters replied cautiously, running his gloved hand over Fenrir's fur. "While I'm sure that Io will insist on being your personal caretaker given the nature of our facilities, I would like you to introduce yourself to the ship's chief physician and psychologist. Nothing serious, just to put faces to names before your official examinations and debrief. As I said previously, we are on a flexible timetable but protocol is protocol." "Understood," Winters nodded, knowing he didn't have a choice. Natori's brows rose at his complacent attitude, but he said nothing further on the subject. "Very well. Should there be any concerns don't hesitate to hail the bridge via the ship's VI system. To our guests, welcome." Alice could have sworn Natori was timing it, as he delivered his parting words precisely as the shuttle slipped past the forcefield separating hangar C-2 from the vacuum of space. Cromwell advised them all to remain seated, and with a gentle bump the craft finally landed. "Don't push it too hard, Xan," Russell advised. "Oh come on, not you too," the Cauthan groaned, making every effort to hide the vortex of excitement and dread that swirled in his chest. His danger sense was alight. To his surprise, Russell burst into laughter as Alice and MacGregor unbuckled their restraints and secured what little gear they'd brought with them. "No I mean literally don't push too hard. Gravity is still pretty low in this part of the ship. You'll hit your head." "I don't know what you're talking abou- whoa whoa whoa!" Xan yelped, finding that even in a crippled state the typical force he'd use to stand from a chair was enough to propel him out of the seat and towards the roof of the shuttle. Both Winters children were ready for that eventuality, taking him softly by the arm or hand and ensuring he landed safely. "What in Kel's name did you do to me?" "We did nothing, Xan. When we get to the core of the ship it will feel just like being back on Mara. I'll do my best to explain gravity to you but now's probably not the best time," Alice advised as Russell did his best to keep Fenrir calm and aid Veera in adapting to the low gravity environment. "Your feathers look great," he told her quietly, taking her hand and using gentle force to convey a sense of the strength necessary to move her body towards the hangar door and the corridors beyond. She smiled nervously, but was happy to take an opportunity to snuggle up to him in public. At the base of the shuttle he took a couple hops with her. "Think you can make it the rest of the way? Cromwell probably isn't coming out until Fenrir's at a safe distance." "I can't blame her," Veera agreed, knowing how most any Cauthan would regard a maturing hyrven. "I think I'm getting a hang of this now." "Knew you would," he responded with pride. "Wait for me at those doors over there, the ones with the green light above them. I'll just be a moment." "I'm glad you're feeling better," Veera whispered, just for him. He kissed her quickly. "You're not in danger." "I know it wasn't just that, darling." "That was a lot of it," the Jumper insisted before motioning back to the shuttle. "But look…that's a lot of change in a day." As Russell bounded gracefully back to the craft for Fenrir, his armor light and unobtrusive thanks to the hangar's distance from the ship's core, Veera watched as MacGregor and Cromwell disembarked with ease. Fenrir tried to scamper off and propelled himself into an awkward tumble instead, leading her husband on a merry chase through the expansive, metal chamber. Veera's focus lingered on Xan and Alice, however, with the female human taking over escorting the Cauthan apprentice as her brother found himself occupied. "I thought there would be more humans," Xan spoke, looking around and finding plenty of metal and odd lights, piping and cables, but no other humans. Another shuttle could be seen off to his left, but it was immobile. "Where is the one we were speaking to?" "Here," Alice offered, bidding him to relax while she fiddled with the device on her wrist. The same projection they'd seen on the way up appeared, and Alice managed to highlight the hangar. "We're in this space here. Admiral Kaczynski governs the ship from here," she pointed to the bridge back in the belly of the ship's other half. Xan's expression tightened. "You mean…all this metal is…that little thing?" He demanded quietly. "Yes," Alice affirmed simply, stepping aside as Xan developed a long stare in his eyes and began to wander off towards the forcefield. She caught her brother's gaze and made a silent hand gesture. I'll handle it, she mouthed, shooing him and Veera away so that they could settle in and hopefully begin the long process of reintegration into modern living. Cromwell had already departed for the long walk to hangar A-1 and Lachlan had followed, explaining briefly to Veera that he intended to make a report to the Admiral and asking her to pass the message along. That left Alice to comfortably stroll along at a safe distance behind Xan as the Cauthan inexorably approached the window into the vacuum of space. "By Kel's name and all that's sacred," Xan muttered with barely concealed dread, unable to tear his eyes away from the growing maw of darkness. The bright lights of the hangar overwhelmed most of the natural starlight, rendering the scene in quite dire terms from the young Cauthan's perspective. The sounds of bone cane and talons clicking on metal were the only thing he could hear over some unearthly, mechanical humming. His head felt light. "Hey, I gotcha," Alice assured him quietly as he stumbled. To Xan, all that registered was that a relatively soft body had stabilized him. Kel was calling out, and the unnatural urge to jump was setting every primitive portion of his mind on fear-based overdrive. He was floating in the black. To do so while still alive was nothing short of sacrilege. "Xan? Hey, you alright?" "What's…what in Kel's name is…" Xan wasn't sure if Alice's touch would have prompted him to turn around and head back towards the interior of the well-lit ship, but something else now demanded his attention. The smallest hint of white and blue could be seen peeking up from the lip of the hangar bay, and with every step he could see more. He pushed off his cane and moved forward, seeing the ice caps and oceans of Mara's northern hemisphere. Another step revealed the beginnings of greenery, shrouded by dusk. There were browns too, and maybe a bit of red. The little orb was just hanging there, suspended in Kel's domain. "Xan? Xan!" Alice whispered, watching with increasing concern as his feathers and scales began to shake violently. She could hear his breathing, ragged and forced. His pupils were wide and fearful. "Xan, it's ok!" The young death priest felt like he was drowning, swimming slowly through the black outside. He didn't want to believe, but what else could he conclude? Thantis would surely arrive at the same answer. He was looking down at his home, his entire world, small enough to frame between his hands. Fear gripped his heart, the kind of fear he'd only ever felt once before, the night he'd faced Kel. "Xan. Xan, you're hurting-" A high pitched cry of pain suddenly jerked Xan back to the then and there. His chest was heaving and he felt as though he'd run a lap around the village with his bad leg. To his right he saw Alice's visage wincing and contorted in pain. Looking down, it became clear that he was to blame. "I-I'm so sorry, Alice!" "I always knew these jumpsuits were crap!" She gasped, reaching down and removing his paw gently from her left forearm. In his panic he had deployed his claws, piercing her clothing and flesh as the nature of his world had been dumped upon him. Crimson blood dripped slowly to the floor of the hangar. "Alice! You're bleeding!" He yelped, terrified of what might happen to him; and her to a lesser extent. "I know just, be quiet a moment please," she commanded, activating the comm link between the A-MACS on her wrist and the ship. "Io, are you there? We've had a bit of a contamination incident in the hangar. Also I might need a tourniquet; he got in there pretty deep." "I didn't mean-" "I know, but please! I'd rather not bleed out right now, or ever. Io, Xan had a bit of a moment and his claws punctured the skin of my forearm. I'm applying pressure now but I need to know where the nearest medical bay is." 'I suppose the why can come later?' Io sighed dramatically. 'This way, please. Move swiftly but not rapidly enough to elevate your heart rate. The Admiral did ensure that one of the clinics would be available to the quarantine zone. Oh, and apply pressure and elevation.' "Yeah, I've got it," Alice replied, holding up her left arm up and tilting her head to review the map on her wrist. She made haste to the corridors beyond the hangar. With the low gravity lessening the burden she was soon at the doors as Xan hobbled after her faster than he'd ever pushed his body to move since his injury. "Xan just take your time. You can't do anything anyway!" She called behind her. "Io, make sure he gets somewhere safe?" 'Of course, Alice. I can see the panic on your face, but I would advise you to remain calm. Veera has clawed your brother a handful of times and there have never been adverse reactions after routine sterilization and treatment. Maran life is based on xDNA, as I’m sure you reviewed last evening. Any viruses will be unable to infect you.' "I know, I know and I can't wait for Gerard to take a crack at it but there could still be macrophages or parasites, or my artery could be nicked!" Fortunately for Alice, the sections of the ship available to her were more or less linear. The only way to go was deeper into the ship. That and Io had apparently found a new toy. "Are you allowed to be using the motorized gurneys?" 'You ask a lot of questions for a woman concerned about bleeding out. And it's not my fault every device on this ship is networked. Now hop on, Alice. I've always wanted to be a valiant steed. Probably best to avoid the tubes. To the elevators, away!' Io declared, garbed fully in medieval armor as Alice sat herself on the four-wheeled, motorized hospital bed and was whisked away into the belly of the ship. Behind her, Xan was left despondent and alone until Io's disembodied voice called out to him from somewhere above. 'Xan, please follow the blinking green lights. I will take you to where Alice is going. Thank you.' ----- By the time Xan arrived at the clinic, having already passed dozens of innovations, contraptions, and sights that should have made his head spin, Alice was already being bandaged up by a mechanical arm hanging from the ceiling of the room. It was a small area, intended for wellness visits and minor, lab-related injuries that did not merit transit to either the main civilian medical center in section 4, or the military one in section 9. The space was well lit, had almost full gravity, and was an assault on Xan’s senses; from the unnaturally smooth floor, to the blinking lights and panels, to the shelves and drawers stacked full of tools and objects whose purpose he could only begin to guess at. Alice gave the Cauthan a quick wave, one that was immediately mimicked by the hinged arm. Io's face could be seen on a control terminal adjacent to the multi-tool that formed the ‘operating end’ of the mechanical doctor. It was constantly moving back and forth between Alice and a small, standardized set of shelves full of medical implements packaged in such a way that the arm could make use of them if no human professionals were in the immediate area. Xan remained silent as the two women talked. "So no major damage?" Alice requested with concern. 'The wound was deep considering the location and your thin frame, but it missed the arteries and major ligaments,' Io reported professionally, having changed yet again and styled her hair up in her customary bun. 'Do your best to avoid heavily lifting or stress for a few weeks. If you do experience any numbness, pain, or tingling please notify your primary care AI immediately…that would be me.’ "But of course!" Alice laughed, flexing her fingers and resting her right hand atop the large bandage Io had wrapped around her left arm. "So you said my brother also got on the wrong end of Cauthan claws?" 'And teeth if I recall correctly. It was quite the…passionate experience for both of them,' Io remarked slyly. "Not taking that bait...yet," Alice insisted. "But before my bullheaded brother comes charging in here, get him to the military med bay and make sure a full antibody panel is run in addition to whatever else they do. Check for everything, and if something new or unique shows up, get it synthesized. Even if I'm fine after this you never know if we might need something like that later for one of the Cauthan or other crew. Ah…we can do that right?" Alice paused, considering that even aboard the Event Horizon some things might not be possible. 'Yes, Alice. That should be a minor inconvenience at worst given the tools available,' Io assured her, placing a hand on her temple. 'Oh my, yes what a wonderful blood lab. Thank you, Admiral.' "I was wondering when you'd let me join in. Alice, status?" He demanded. "I'm fine now, Admiral. Will the two of you please ensure that Veera and Fenrir are alright and that my brother knows I'm in no danger? He'd probably do something stupid and or kill Xan. I would at least like to study him first…that was a joke by the way," Alice clarified, seeing the distressed look on the Cauthan’s face. "Oh, Lachlan should be by soon with a report and Pilot Cromwell handled the hyrven situation splendidly. I’m sure he’ll be on the next shuttle down. Veera didn’t bring enough food for all three of them." Natori's deep laughter came over the speakers in the room, and he squeezed in next to Io on the arm's monitor. Alice was sure the two of them were already hamming it up on the bridge. "You are certainly your father's daughter, Miss Winters. It will be done as you…dare I say command? I suspect you'll need some time to get settled, but once you and your guest have come to an arrangement regarding ongoing relations and accommodations I would like to be made aware. I shall have to inform Qul'Roth as well. Best not to keep Ghaelen guessing, you know?" "Of course, Admiral. Xan and I need to have a discussion first though. I think he probably has a few questions for me regarding the Overview effect." "Hmm, I suppose hangar C-2 was oriented correctly for a view of the planet…" "Admiral, he's here now. I should go." "Oh yes yes, of course!" Natori replied cheerfully in his seemingly scatterbrained but ever astute manner. "Io, will you be remaining with me?" 'Only if you're willing to take the risk that my Jumper does something stupid on his way to your medical facilities. He's doing much better today but you never know what might set him off. Running through the crew rosters I can think of four individuals who might actively try that at some point. My money's not on Lipper and I am very much a betting woman,' Io assured them all with a sultry lilt. Alice hoped it was on account of betting and not the idea of her brother getting into an honor match against Lipper's squad. She liked them on the whole, but blood was thicker than water. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that Beta Jumpers might feel the need to prove themselves to an original from Omega. "Admiral, you can play with Io later. Io, take care of my brother and get yourself up to speed with the molecular synthesis equipment and the various labs aboard, if you please. We will need you to assist us with all sorts of examinations and experiments going forward should I acquire the necessary consent from our lovely partners." 'I await with anticipation. Goodbye Alice. It was my pleasure to take an intimate scan of your forearm.' Io promptly disappeared, leaving Natori’s image looking at Alice with a bemused expression. "Isn't she wonderful?" He gushed. "Don't you have a ship to run?" Alice countered lightly as she hopped off the gurney. "Well yes, I suppose I do. Feel better Alice, and do not hesitate to call for any of us. I hope to announce your progress to the rest of the crew sometime soon. Farewell." Xan was left standing in the doorway of the strange room, having been forced to reevaluate his opinion of Alice given that she'd just commanded Io, her brother, and even Natori as though she were a soldier herself. "Guess it's a good thing I wore a tank top under this thing instead of anything with sleeves. I'd never have forgiven you if you'd ripped the clothes I brought from Sol," she ‘warned’ him with a smile. Xan opened his mouth but no words came out. What could he even say? Alice frowned with concern. "Hey, it's fine, alright? Io took a peek in there, ultrasound, tiny cameras, everything. You didn't kill me, and I still have full use of my hand and arm. We'll just have to see if I'm infected by anything later." "Like the smallpox?!" Xan blurted, looking ready to descend into another panic attack. Alice couldn't help herself, striding forward and taking the completely inundated Cauthan into a hug, the type that she and her brother often shared when the burdens of life became onerous. "No Xan, not like the smallpox. If my brother has been with your people, eaten your food, gotten wounded, and survived for a year I'm sure I'll be fine. This is just an abundance of caution paired with an experiment. You're overwhelmed, aren't you?" "I'm not!" He insisted, standing stiffly as his chin rested just above her shoulder. They were almost the same height. "You don't have to be like this around me," Alice whispered. "I just want us both to learn, and I'm so sorry for just dropping you into this without any explanation. I should have waited a few days, explained about Mara and space. Forgive me?" She requested, pulling back and giving him the courtesy of looking into his eyes. "Why are you asking me? I'm the one who hurt you," he muttered. "Because I forced you to confront the fact that the nature of existence is so different from what you understand that you had a panic attack." Xan turned his head away. "Stop treating me like a cub." "Oh please, if you were a cub I'd be hugging and kissing and snuggling your incredibly cute fluffiness," Alice informed him with express sincerity. "So how about we stick to learning and knowledge, Xan?" "What in Seil's name could I possibly hope to teach you? Your people are demigods, even if you bleed. Last thing I need is another tutor, even a divine one." "You're going to make me blush, Xan. But I'll tell you what. Why don't you focus on what's important for you and your people, and let me worry about what's important for me and my people, alright?" The Cauthan sighed, remembering the colorful orb hanging in the darkness. "Yeah…yeah alright. I have a lot of questions." "And I hope to have all the answers, but how about we go find you a place to sit down and settle in. A clinic is no place for this kind of talk." Alice was just about to lead Xan out of the room when a pair of hurried footfalls reached their ears and an unmistakable voice called out in the corridors. "Alice? Ma chère, is that you?" Alice slipped past Xan into the hallway, her face lighting up. "Yvonne!" ----- Previous | First | Next ----- Own The HEL Jumper: Survive in the format of your choice: hardcover | paperback | epub | Amazon Kindle
Book 1 of The HEL Jumper ----- Previous | First | Next | Patreon Thanks to Tulip, Big_Papa_Dakky, Mr_Polygon, txgunman65, Darth Android, Mamish, Vikairious, Sam Berry, ClarityAndVision, RedHawkdude, KillTech, LilLaussa, Daddy Talon, Gruecifer, Gaelan Darkwater, and 33 others currently supporting me on patreon. ----- “Oh my god oh my god oh my god,” Alice muttered rapidly under her breath, walking the short distance to the temple of Kel with her brother and Veera. She was thankful he’d brought her a small, yet hearty and fresh breakfast. Her butterfly-filled stomach didn’t feel capable of handling an Event Horizon ration bar. “Is it worth bothering to tell you to calm down?” Russell joked lightly. It was an overcast but warm morning, heralding a toilsome and humid day in the fields for most of the village. “Probably not!” Alice admitted. He shrugged. “Just remember you’re the one with all the tech…and power. Try to act like it,” he encouraged in a more serious tone. “Yeah, you’re right, I’m sorry,” Alice accepted his point. Even so she mumbled a retort under her breath, unwilling to let her brother have the last word. "I bet you were excited when you hopped out of your pod, mister super serious bigshot." “You don’t need to be sorry,” Veera insisted warmly, casting a sidelong glance at her husband as they stood just outside the temple. “I find it wonderful that you’re so excited to get to know our people.” “Thanks Veera! Glad to see Lieutenant Buzzkill hasn’t rubbed off on you too much,” Alice sniggered, giving even Io a laugh as she did her best to translate the phrase for Veera’s understanding. Slang was not a major part of the Cauthan’s command of the English language just yet. “Well if you’re all done I’m going in,” Winters informed them, holding aside the black cloth door cover featuring the curious diamond filled with branching lines. “Hey Xan, Thantis, you in here? Fenrir around? He behave alright?” Alice could not hear the reply, but given that her brother continued inside she figured it was an affirmative. When Veera followed after him she steeled herself, took a final deep breath and strode forward. Her words caught in her throat, turning to a gasp as she got her first look at the inside of a Cauthan temple. To her it seemed something like a primitive library, apothecary, and doctor’s office all smashed together. But even that heavenly alien amalgamation of purpose was nothing compared to who, and what, was inside. “He’s beautiful,” she whispered. “Which one?” Her brother joked, though her reply wiped the smile clean off his face. “Yes.” ----- Xan glanced up from his customary seat within the temple, furs padding his leg and Fenrir taking a morning snooze at his side. It seemed even hyrven suffered in humid weather and Thantis was, of course, making notes to that effect. Distraction arrived in the form of Winters, who waltzed into the temple like he owned the place, as was his custom. Xan reasoned he did ‘own’ the hyrven, at least. Behind him came Veera, and then another human. He allowed the vellumn he’d been reading by the light from one of the two small windows on either side of the building to lay flat in his lap, old treatises on the setting of broken bones more than outmatched by her. He knew it was a female thanks to his friendship with Io, but he’d never seen the spirit clothe herself in such a way as this human. The long, reflective fur that grew from the top of her head was tied in a loose band and hung at least as far down her back as the voluminous crests of a well-endowed Cauthan female. She wore tight fitting clothing, a pair of blue pants that were made from a relatively durable fabric, and a white sleeveless top that left nothing about her torso’s anatomy to the imagination. He grimaced as he beheld the odd lumps of a human female’s chest for the first time in the flesh. A lance of phantom pain ran through his leg. She was far too happy for his liking, saying something to her brother he didn’t understand. The Jumper extended his translator to him. He accepted it. “What’s she doing here?” He demanded. “Damn, Xan. Wake up on the wrong side of the bed, or did Fenrir gnaw on your cane?” Russell asked with a smirk. “That’s your dog?!” The female yelped. “It’s called a hyrven, human. Who in Kel’s name are you?” Either Xan’s tone or words did not sit well with Russell. He walked right up to the young Cauthan and leaned over him. “That’s my sister you’re taking pot shots at, you little sack of shen shit.” “Piss off, hyrven breath.” “Takes one to know one, short stuff.” “I’ll have you know I’m average in height and I have the scrolls to prove it, you furless wonder.” “Don’t make me call you a cripple, cripple.” “At least I have claws, squishy male.” Russell’s face broke into a broad smile as he took a knee to scratch Fenrir under the chin and bump forearms with Xan. The toothy grin from the former guardsman made it clear that there were no hard feelings between them. “Seriously though dude, she’s my sister. Take it easy would you?” “You know how good change has been to me,” Xan groused. “Forgive me if I don’t take well to outsiders. Last ones took my leg.” “And the outsider before that slaughtered them all to a man and then killed a fucking ursae so you could be nice and warm and have a spankin’ new cane,” Russell shot back. “Look man, if today’s a bad day of the leg we’ll come back. We just wanted to say hi, exchange some knowledge, and help Alice think of some ways to start improving life here in the village.” “Did you not just hear what I said about change?” Xan demanded in disbelief. Russell rolled his eyes. “Do you want technology from the people capable of traversing Kel’s domain or not, you little shit?” “Russell!” Veera and Alice yelled in unison. “What?!” Both men replied. Russell looked back at Xan. “Thank you,” he said in a righteous tone. “Us males have to stick together, right Fenrir?” Xan asked. “I, for one, would love some new technology. Good day to you all!” Thantis called as he emerged from his private quarters. “And Alice? Good day to you. Oh dear let me see…hmm, I may have another mug around here somewhere,” Thantis mused, immediately returning from whence he came to rummage around for glassware. “Traitor,” Xan muttered jokingly, looking up at the newest human to intrude into his life. He could see the resemblance between Russell and her, especially in the nose and their hair. Her eyes were different, however, a deep, earthen brown. He took a long breath. “So your name is Alice? My name is Xan. I’m a-” “A death priest, right?!” She blurted out. “I was…going to say apprentice. But I prefer that,” he eventually replied, grabbing his cane and making to stand. “Oh no it’s alright, you don’t have to-” “Never tell me what I can and can’t do,” Xan snapped. He was momentarily afraid Winters would bite his head off, but the human stood by quietly, holding onto the scruff of Fenrir’s neck instead. The hyrven didn’t seem interested in moving at all, much less attacking anyone given the humidity and temperature. “I’m very sorry, I didn’t mean to insult you,” Alice replied in a much more reserved fashion. The hurt in her tone made his feathers wilt. “Yeah well, I’m still getting used to being a gods-forsaken cripple. My bad,” he said, figuring she wouldn’t mind salty language if she was Russell’s sister. “Xan served in the city guard; has the scars and kill count to show for it,” Russell supplied. “Yes, I can see that,” Alice agreed, incapable of missing the nicked ear, eyepatch, and cane. She extended her hand to him. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, priest of Kel. My name is Alice Winters.” “Yeah, I could definitely get used to that,” Xan smiled earnestly for perhaps the first time in her presence, taking her hand as she didn’t seem to want to bump forearms. His eyes widened a fraction as he came in contact with her skin. “You’re soft.” “I…” Alice suddenly withdrew her hand, clasping it with the other. The Cauthan regarded her face with interest. “Hey Thantis, forget the tea and get out here would you? She’s turning colors!” “Oh now you’ve done it, jackwagon,” Russell interjected, dragging Xan back into his seat by his ear as Veera sighed and took a seat on the stone table in the middle of the room. Thantis soon arrived and handed her the first mug of tea. “A cold brew to energize you on a muggy day,” he declared with vibrancy. “And yes, my apprentice I witnessed this very phenomenon yesterday. Remind me, spirit Io. This is embarrassment?” ‘Or self-consciousness, or potentially bashfulness, yes,’ the AI supplied. “I apologize for my apprentice, Alice,” Thantis said immediately. “Might I offer you some tea?” “That would be lovely, thank you. And don’t worry, I’m fine standing,” she added as Thantis continued to look around the space as if another chair might materialize from nothing. “Io, this is alright to drink?” ‘I have not encountered anything lethal to humans within the Cauthan diet so far, but one can never be too careful. A shame the A-MACS don’t come with the same suite of spectroscopy tools as the B-MASS. Sir, would you mind testing it for us?’ Io asked politely. “Seriously?” He replied, having left his armor at home. ‘Women and children first, mein barbar,’ she countered with a wink. “Oh yeah, real funny. Hey Thantis, what’s in this stuff?” The elderly priest rattled off a list of ingredients without missing a beat, returning with more cups for Xan and Russell before finally taking one for himself. By that time Io had cleared the concoction for human consumption and Alice had taken a tentative sip. “Oh my, that is wonderful!” She agreed, feeling a cooling sensation akin to mint wash over her tongue as well as a couple of other savory flavors. “I am thrilled to hear it, and please consider yourself welcome in the house of Kel,” Thantis stated, greeting her more officially. “Thank you for your time,” Alice replied. “I had hoped to speak with you about a great many things today, should you have the time.” “And I you. Time will be made,” Thantis spoke. “I see you have already met my apprentice and our most intriguing object of study?” “I have. He’s a hyrven, right?” Alice asked, recalling the word from Io’s encyclopedia on the Cauthan. “They both are,” her brother jested, though she now understood his relationship with Xan a bit better. They were blood brothers, veterans. “Those are bold words for someone within striking distance,” Xan quipped, brandishing his cane. “Hey now. I had that made for you and I can have it taken away!” Russell insisted as Xan swung lazily at his head. “Boys!” Veera interrupted sternly. “Alice has business here and the two of you are behaving like hyrven. Russell, I should go on patrol soon. Are you coming?” “Yeah, course. Just wanted to make sure the introductions went smoothly.” “Oh you achieved that much,” Alice assured him sarcastically. He winked at her. “Welcome to my world, sis.” “Oh you are so full of it,” she shot back. “How delightful, such youthful energy,” Thantis remarked, having dragged a single chair out from his living quarters. He simply sat and observed the goings on, enjoying a livelihood that rarely graced his solemn temple. After a few more minutes of light conversation, Veera and Russell finished their tea and bade them farewell. Fenrir, after some persuasion, decided to accompany them. That left Alice sitting politely in a second chair across from Thantis and Xan. The former was looking at her with unbridled excitement, the latter with a guarded expression. “Now then, Alice, what did you wish to discuss? I daresay there is an entire world of both knowns and unknowns for us to speak of?” The elder began. “I’ve not forgotten your request about the Egyptians,” Alice began, wanting to put a courteous foot forward as she began a recording on her A-MACS. “However I would like to start with something a bit more immediate and relevant.” “That seems a prudent suggestion,” the death priest agreed. “Please.” “Yes well, I’ve been charged with fulfilling part of the treaty that was just signed between our peoples, namely the portion where humanity will assist this village. It’s rather open ended and is not limited to research that we conduct here on Mara. But at the same time I don’t want to overstep.” “How courteous,” Xan deadpanned. “Courteous indeed,” Thantis agreed earnestly with a sharp look at his apprentice. “Perhaps it is best to start small, Alice.” “That was my thought as well. To that end I was hoping to inquire about your cooking pots.” “Oh? What about them?” Thantis asked, not anticipating that particular line of questioning. “Well, during human history there have been some instances of civilizations poisoning themselves with metals,” Alice began, causing Xan and Thantis to look at one another with worry. “Not all metals are toxic, but on occasion the refining process can miss something.” “I see. You have concerns regarding the metal we use to prepare food? You think we may be ingesting foulness?” Thantis asked. “Yes.” “And how will you go about determining if this is the case?” “No poking and prodding, at least initially” Alice promised, earning a smile from Thantis. “I’ve asked Lachlan to interview villagers with a series of questions. He’s the man who was with me yesterday.” “There’s another?!” Xan ejaculated. “There is, my apprentice,” Thantis confirmed. “Sentaura was quite taken with him, likely on account of the instant bond he formed with her son. He is staying with them.” “No hyrven-fucking way…” “Xan!” Thantis snapped. “You will comport yourself in a manner worthy of Kel or you will study runes all day. Is that clear?” Thantis demanded. Both Alice and Xan fell silent as the grave, having never seen Thantis snap at anyone before. “Yes sir, I’m sorry sir,” he replied. “Please continue, Alice.” “Ah yeah, so…right! Lachlan is out there and hopefully the responses he’s given will indicate if there’s a problem. I can share them with you now if you’d like. Did my brother ever explain the periodic table to either of you?” The blank look on the faces of the death priests answered that question well enough. Alice was unperturbed. “Alright, no worries. It’s probably more boring than runes,” she suggested, tossing a smile Xan’s way. The Cauthan partially returned it. “What matters now is health. I can explain the ‘what’ later. The ‘how’ is that, in humans at least, the body is unable to get rid of certain types of metal. It accumulates in our nervous systems, the parts of our body that allow us to control our movements and thoughts. Eventually it can even kill.” “My word!” Thantis gasped. “Here I was thinking the only way metal could kill you is if you get stabbed in the gut with it,” Xan quipped. “That would be quicker,” Alice agreed before listing out the various terms and conditions that she’d requested Lachlan look into. The two Cauthan nodded and listened, occasionally asking for clarification. When she finished they put their heads together. “There was a scroll about a hunter who lost control of his limbs and eventually died, but that happened rather quickly and I think it was on account of something he ate out in the forest,” Xan mused. “Of course you would remember that account, my apprentice,” Thantis smiled. “Yeah well, it’s a lot more interesting than most of what you’ve got laying around,” he replied. “But I don’t recall anything like what you described, Alice. I mean, if anyone was going to have this metal poisoning it would be Thantis and Gentia, and they’re two of the healthiest Cauthan in the village.” “Flattery will get you nowhere with me, but probably somewhere with my mate,” Thantis admitted. “Alice, we would be happy to secure a small sample of metal for analysis aboard your ship, but I do not have any records detailing what you describe.” “That’s a relief!” Alice exclaimed. “So Xan, feel like coming up to the Event Horizon with me? See Kel’s domain from the inside?” “You jest,” Xan eventually replied warily. “Oh, you could come too if you like, Thantis,” Alice suddenly added, seeing the dejected look on his face. It was amazing how easily she thought she could read them, and it explained a great deal of how her brother had integrated himself so seamlessly into their population. “Why do you want me to go up there?” The young Cauthan pressed. Alice did not hide anything from them. “My desire is to introduce you to a couple of other scientists I know and respect. They are doctors, people who specialize in healing the sick and caring for the vulnerable. It’s my hope that we can begin gathering information on your species to help us better understand and treat you.” “And why in Kel’s name would we agree to that? Will you let us strip you down and play around with your body?” Xan demanded hotly. “While my apprentice’s choice of words is most inappropriate...I must echo his sentiments,” Thantis added. Alice did not seem upset in the slightest. Instead she pressed a couple buttons on the personal tablet that she’d brought with her and held it out to them. “My word! What in Meylith’s merciful name is that?!” “That’s a young boy infected with smallpox,” Alice described the image in front of them. “He’s about nine years old, which would make him about the same age here on Mara. You have diseases don't you? Sickness?” “Veera’s own mother passed away from illness many winters ago,” Thantis confirmed. “She is one of many that I can recall.” “I’m sorry,” Alice replied sympathetically before continuing her story. “Smallpox is a virus, a tiny pseudo-lifeform that hijacks human bodies to replicate itself.” “Alright, that’s screwed up,” Xan interjected with disgust. “It is,” Alice agreed strongly. “The human body contains a system for fighting off invaders like that, but the damage is done by the time we can defeat smallpox on our own. I don’t mean to reopen fresh wounds, but it sounds like the most recent raid on your village was similar. They were beaten back but…many Cauthan suffered.” “Yeah, that just about sums it up.” Xan’s tone was harsh, but she could tell it was not directed at her. “So what’s the deal with this smallpawks thing? What does it have to do with you wanting to study our bodies?” “We cured it,” Alice informed them happily. “We discovered a way to immunize people, prevent them from ever getting the disease. As of today smallpox is extinct in the wild. The only remaining samples are kept in a handful of high security virology labs. That’s the field of study devoted to viruses, by the way.” “You have people whose entire lives are spent studying just one thing?” Thantis requested. “Our most advanced men and women of learning choose to specialize in one subject,” Alice elaborated. “The body of human knowledge is simply too great for anyone to be an expert in everything, or even most things.” “By Kel, how extraordinary,” the elder whispered in awe. “So this virus you spoke of, how did you find this immunity?” “The trick was in helping the body to develop its own defenses,” Alice explained, switching to images of an immunization clinic. “We would take tiny samples of the virus, samples we knew to be dead, and introduce them into the body intentionally. That’s what that doctor is doing right there with that needle.” “Yes, yes and then?” Thantis demanded eagerly. “What happens when you intentionally introduce it?” “The body recognizes it and stores that information away, so that if it ever encounters smallpox in the wild, it destroys it immediately. We have vaccines like this for dozens of diseases…and almost all of our children live to become adults,” Alice concluded with gravity, driving home the point. “So what you’re saying is, if you study us you can begin doing this sort of stuff to our bodies?” Xan asked cautiously. “That’s the hope, Xan. I would not dare make any promises I cannot keep personally, but at a minimum I would like to understand your body better. Even if we don’t cure diseases, maybe we could help with lesser things like broken bones or wounds. Take your leg for example. I’ve met many human soldiers who were wounded like you and we’ve begun making biological prosthetics for them! Think limbs made of metal and plastics that integrate seamlessly into the body. Oh drat, I don’t have any pictures of those available on my device and you have no idea what plastic is. I’ll have to grab some for you next time I’m up on the Event Horizon.” Alice was too busy playing with her tablet to notice the change in Xan’s expression. “What else…?” “Hmm?” She lifted her head to find Thantis looking sadly at his apprentice. “What else can you…fix?” Xan demanded. “I…” Alice suddenly understood the question. “I’m sorry, Xan. I can’t promise anything. I was reading some information that Io put together last night. Even at the most basic level our bodies are different. I couldn’t…I wouldn’t dare do anything to any of you until we understand exactly how your bodies work. It could take years. There are so many humans who died trying to advance our study of medicine…I cannot allow that to happen here.” “On that we are in agreement, young Alice,” Thantis spoke up. “While I would heartily welcome any knowledge or assistance in improving the health of our people, we have lost so many recently. Besides, to consider the very idea of killing one so that another might live? Such bloody sacrifice is antithetical to the balance.” “Your death god…doesn’t like death?” Alice cocked her head, causing Xan to snort in derision. “Since you seem to be so confident, Xan, why don’t you explain the balance to Alice, hmm?” Thantis put him on the spot. The young Cauthan felt his scales shake for a moment. He met Alice’s eyes. “Kel is like winter,” he began. “That’s your name, isn’t it?” “It is,” Alice affirmed, oddly spellbound as she prepared herself to absorb Cauthan mythology. “Right, so Kel is the Lord of Winter. He comes and reaps what remains of the harvest. The trees retreat and crops wither and die. Snow blankets the ground and the cold…it kills. But then it fades. It delivers a new world to us each spring where life can grow anew. That is the balance, and that is the sort of death that Kel brings.” Thantis nodded sagely in the silence, proud of his pupil. Alice took a moment to process the philosophy, finding it to be both elegant and compelling. “I see. Thank you for sharing with me. Humanity does not have a god like Kel, at least not in modern times, but we have something known as the Hippocratic Oath. My friends, the doctors I spoke of, they both took this oath.” “And what oath might that be?” Thantis wondered. “Do no harm.” ----- “And up ya go now, wee fluffy lad! How was yer playdate?” Lachlan asked Ursol, having retrieved the tyke from the temple of Meylith in the early afternoon. Sentaura had accompanied him there that morning, explaining that Ursol would be learning with the acolytes and the other cubs of the village. Lachlan referred to it as a school, earning a tilt of her head. After turning Ursol over to Gentia, they had parted ways. Sentaura made her way to the fields, while Lachlan began his tour of the village at Alice’s behest. He introduced himself as politely as possible given that he was armed, armored, and worst of all acting in the manner of a door to door salesman or Jehovah’s Witness. Surprisingly, more than a few Cauthan found time in their day to speak about their lord and savior heavy metal poisoning, and by the time he retrieved Ursol, MacGregor had a statistically significant dataset to deliver to Alice. “Well well, left Sentaura in the fields to come and play around at my temple?” Gentia teased as Ursol waddled his way over, eager to see and play with the strange but friendly human some more. “When does she usually come for him?” Lachlan asked, unsure if he should attempt to engage in humor or sarcasm with one of the village elders. “When she’s done,” Gentia offered, watching as the human Marine lifted Ursol into his lap as he sat on one of the many benches throughout the place of worship. With most families returned to some form of residence, it had returned to its primary function. Only a handful of homeless still resided there. “How did you know we were finished with today’s lessons?” “I can’t say I did, just happened to be done with my work and it seems Alice is still over at tha temple next door,” he replied, grabbing Ursol’s tiny paw as he reached for the knife that was strapped to his chest. “Now now little one, let’s not be gettin’ curious with the weapons, alright?” “Can we see momma?” Ursol requested. “I don’ see why not,” the Marine agreed, looking at Gentia to see if she would suggest otherwise. “I think that would be wise. He should be with his mother,” she remarked pointedly. “Ya won’t be hearing protest from me on that point. Could ya give me an idea o’ where she might be?” Lachlan requested. “Head to the north gate and search the fields to the northeast. If she is still there I’m sure you will find her. I don’t know how you humans stand this sort of heat dressed like that.” “Heh, that would be thanks to a little thing we call sweat.” Lachlan pointed to his brow where he knew there would be a fine sheen of moisture given the weather. Fortunately for him relief was but a shuttle ride away, and he privately admitted to counting down the hours until dusk. Not wanting to let any aspect of the new male in his life go unexplored, Ursol promptly stood on MacGregor’s legs and licked at his forehead. “Now just what do ya think yer doing?” The Marine exclaimed, holding the youngster at arm’s length. His muzzle was scrunched up in displeasure. “Yucky salt!” “While I’m sure my mate would be utterly fascinated by such a development, I am not,” Gentia chuckled. “And on that subject I believe you have a guest, human.” “Hey Lachlan!” Alice called from the entrance to the temple. “How’s it going?” “Not too bad, lassie!” He replied, happy to see a familiar face as she walked over to him. “Here, let me transfer what I’ve got to ya. I was just about ta head out and find this little guy’s mum. What have you been up ta all day?” “Chatting up the death priests,” Alice replied with a laugh, enjoying her new life immensely. “I’m sure I won’t hear the end of it tonight,” Gentia remarked knowingly. “Selah to you, Gentia,” Alice added, internally kicking herself for not having addressed the Cauthan matriarch sooner. “Your husband was quite welcoming and he and I had a fruitful discussion. We’ve agreed to meet again within the next couple of days and Xan has tentatively volunteered for some simple medical procedures aboard our ship. I hope we’ll be able to lessen his pain and learn more about how your bodies work.” “I see,” Gentia said sternly. “Perhaps I will need to discuss my mate’s liberal interpretation of the duties of an apprentice? No offense, Alice Winters, but you will not be taking any of my acolytes up to your ship.” “I do apologize if I implied such a thing,” Alice conceded as Lachlan bade them both farewell. Ursol had grown bored and agitated given the shift in conversation, but the promise of seeing his mother and getting a ride on MacGregor’s shoulders was more than enough to get him back on track. “Ow hey now, watch what yer doin’ with that helmet!” Alice and Gentia both had a small chuckle at the Marine’s expense as he departed into the afternoon sun, leaving the two women to watch over the few remaining Cauthan children who were waiting for their parents to come and collect them. “How long will they stay here?” Alice requested. “I presume you mean until what age?” Gentia sought clarification. Alice nodded. “Most will leave our daily care right around Ursol’s age, perhaps a year or two later. Farming is hard work, and every hand is a blessing.” “I’m sure,” Alice agreed. “Those who remain with us longer will learn runes or other skills, depending on their parents’ wishes. Most continue on to apprentice as hunters, craftsmen, or artisans. Some cubs will never spend a day here.” “So there’s no formal system of education,” Alice concluded. “I liked your brother. He didn’t judge and was easy to poke fun at,” Gentia declared, gazing at Alice. “Oh and don’t look at me like that. You think I don’t realize how different things are? Look at you. You’re young, have no mate or cubs, and have spent your entire life learning. I am sure we must seem-” “Beautiful,” Alice surprised her. “I’ve studied many alien cultures, and yours is wonderful in so many ways. I didn’t mean to imply anything, Gentia, and I apologize for interrupting your day. I had just hoped to learn a bit about Meylith and your customs around mating since my own brother has participated in them. It was Thantis’ suggestion.” “Was it now?” Gentia asked with a smile. “That tea-obsessed mate of mine actually let you go willingly? You must have said something quite offensive. I half expected him to tie you to a chair and bombard you with questions until your brother or Veera came calling.” “No offense to your mate or his apprentice, but I doubt either of them could manage that feat,” Alice smiled, though Gentia seemed to deflate slightly. “So what did you promise young Xan, hmm?” The elder wondered. “To restore his sight; to give him his leg back? After what your brother has done it seems reasonable to entertain the possibility.” “I promised him nothing of the sort, though I hope one day those things might be a possibility,” Alice stated soberly. “All I offered him was the chance to help his people. We cannot heal what we do not know. Veera will be participating as well. You may not know me, but you know my brother and Io. They will make sure those two are kept safe. All I want is to learn. The more I know, the more I can help.” “Mmm, the proud female and Cauthan in me wants to tell you to leave with your paternalistic words,” Gentia admitted, watching as a cub far younger than Ursol crawled and occasionally toddled her way around the room. To the untrained eye it looked as though she were unattended, but every so often an acolyte would glance her way, ensuring she didn’t go anywhere without supervision. Alice cooed as Gentia reached down and hoisted the small fluffy and feathery bundle onto her lap. “But when I think of her, I would give anything to change her fate for the better.” Alice remained silent, feeling an icy chill creep down the back of her neck as Gentia allowed the little cub to play with her fingers and grasp at her garments. “What’s her name?” She requested, reaching out with a single finger to gently stroke the cub’s crest feathers. They were downy soft. “It’s Ketra. Yes, little one, that’s you,” Gentia spoke kindly as though she’d had dozens of children and grandchildren before. The light brown bundle of fur babbled and cooed back, though Io’s translation suite was not up to the task. Alice concluded the cub was pre-lingual. “And what can I do for Ketra?” The human whispered. “I think I might come to like you, Alice Winters. So far you have asked instead of told. You have looked at us as people instead of subjects. You wish to learn but also to help. Those flying metal…I don’t even know what to call them.” “They’re referred to as shuttles, Gentia,” Alice supplied politely. “Yes, thank you. I sense they are but the tip of the spear in terms of how our lives will change. I enjoy poking fun at Ratha quite often but I share her concerns. On Mara the strong survive and the weak perish. In the face of humanity…we are hopelessly weak, just like Ketra.” Alice blinked rapidly, trying to fight off the weight of a people who understood just how fragile their existence had become. “I think I understand a bit now why contact with civilizations like your own is forbidden under normal circumstances.” “Your brother seemed to have other thoughts,” Gentia chuckled, cradling Ketra and shushing the cub as she began to cry softly. “But we are all grateful for the things he has done. It is…difficult to rely on the benevolence of another when all around us we see so little of it, even from the gods.” “What…where are Ketra’s parents?” Alice asked fearfully. “And you’re brave like him as well,” Gentia observed. “You don’t want to know, but something in you felt compelled to ask. They are dead, Alice Winters. Her home was set ablaze during the raid. When morning came we found her, protected by their bodies. I am unsure exactly how they died. Only Kel knows, and were it not for the swift death your brother delivered to those heathens I would curse His divine name!” The elder paused momentarily, taking a breath to calm herself and to settle Ketra, who seemed to have picked up on the anxiousness around her. “But the balance can be…difficult to understand at times. My mate knows even better than I. Perhaps it is Kel’s idea of a joke or trial, leaving a cub not a season old without family. At least she will not remember such terrors. Her grandparents are able to stop by sometimes but…food must be grown.” “I…I’m so sorry. Please excuse me!” Alice whispered, holding her forearm to her eyes and walking swiftly from the temple. Gentia smiled sadly in her wake. “She has a tender heart even at her age? Perhaps humanity will not disappoint me after all. Forgive me, little Ketra. When you live as long as I have…when you are grown perhaps it would be better if all you have of our way are memories.” ----- Alice did not make it more than a few feet outside the temple before she sat herself in the road, leaned back against the wooden building and cried. “It’s not fair!” She insisted to the ether. Cauthan children were already adorable by nature of their fluffy fur, downy feathers, and curious little faces. They tugged at the heartstrings even with two parents alive and well, but Ketra’s story had Alice’s heart momentarily in tatters. Drawing her knees to her chest, she allowed herself to rest her forehead against her arms and cry in the darkness provided by that position. She questioned how she, alone, could make any real difference in that cub’s life. Alice didn’t even sense him until he was kneeling at her side. “Who the hell do I need to kill?” Her brother demanded quietly. She looked up at him with puffy red eyes and shimmering cheeks, where her tears had left trails of moisture that refused to evaporate in the muggy air. “It sounds like you already killed them,” she replied, prompting Russell to sit at her side. “Did you know about Ketra, Rusty?” “The tiny orphan girl? We found out when we got back,” he affirmed shortly. “Cute little thing.” “This probably isn’t my place but you and Veera…can’t have cubs right? So why not…you’re pretty wealthy for Cauthan, aren’t you?” “It was never an option” he insisted. “We aren’t ready for something like that, Alice. At least we weren’t this year. We decided to head out on our own. We found and cared for Fenrir. That’s no life for a little girl. And…” “What?” Alice placed a hand on his shoulder, seeing the brooding and pained look that had often marked his face as a teen. “Veera prays to Meylith…every night. You think I would suggest something like that to-” he began. The Jumper tried to finish but ended up punching the ground instead and cursing under his breath. “Fuck…fuck!” Even with her limited knowledge of the Cauthan, Alice was able to put two and two together. Meylith was the goddess of home and hearth, and the patron deity of motherhood. An immense cultural significance existed around the institution of child rearing, and not even the thought of her brother mating with an alien could lighten the mood of realizing that Veera was praying every night for her own cubs. “Oh Rusty, I’m sorry.” “We’re alive, Alice. Everything else is just a bonus,” he ground out. His tone was bitter but not sarcastic as he looked around at weary farmers and bustling craftsmen, at Cauthan who worked themselves to the bone to provide for themselves and their children before dying. Even the priests lived ascetic lifestyles, especially now that Antoth held the title of High Priest. “At least now that you’re here I can let off some of this steam. Hobbes was a right cunt.” “Nasty, brutish, and short. The Leviathan,” Alice quoted. “Yeah, but you can’t fault him for calling it like he saw it. Feels like being dropped into medieval Europe.” “I love her, Alice. And I love them,” he whispered to the only human he could imagine saying those words to. “They deserve better.” ‘Ich auch!’ Io agreed emphatically as Russell continued. “I’m not a monster to them. I’m a husband, a friend…a hero.” “You’re not a monster! How could you say such a thing?” Alice gasped, revolted by his language and blindsided by his opinion of himself. He was wearing a shirt and cargo pants, but Io was still with them somehow, using Alice’s A-MACS to present her with a folder full of medical documents. Everything was redacted except for a single line item. “Berserker syndrome?” Alice read softly. “Russell, what…what is this?” “You’re going to help them, right?” He asked instead, forcing a smile to his face and waving to a Cauthan who Alice did not know. “Please, Alice.” Confusion, sorrow born of sympathy, and worry for her brother swirled within Alice’s mind and heart. She had never felt a greater need for a sit down with Yvonne. She thought of the compelling Frenchwoman and her husband, and considered what they would do in her stead. The answer was obvious. “Xan agreed to come to the Event Horizon,” Alice told him, taking his hand and squeezing hard. “It’ll be a long, long journey, but we start tonight!” ----- Previous | First | Next ----- Own The HEL Jumper: Survive in the format of your choice: hardcover | paperback | epub | Amazon Kindle
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